Bella pov

I kept hitting the damn fucking steering wheel. How can he trust me like that with his life and not forgive me for what I did?

I started crying again. Stay by Miley Cyrus on my cd and I turned it up all the way and turned on my walkie and I restarted the song over and pressed the button on the walkie as I song the song to how I felt.

Well, it's good to hear your voice, I hope you're doing fine
And if you ever wonder, I'm lonely here tonight
I'm lost here in this moment and time keeps slipping by
And if I could have just one wish, I'd have you by my side
Oh-oh, I miss you
Oh-oh, I need you
And I love you more than I did before
And if today I don't see your face
Nothing's changed, no one could take your place
It gets harder every day
Say you love me more than you did before
And I'm sorry it's this way
But I'm coming home, I'll be coming home
And if you ask me, I will stay
I will stay
Well, I try to live without you, but tears fall from my eyes
I'm alone, and I feel empty, God, I'm torn apart inside
I look up at the stars, hoping you're doing the same
And somehow I feel closer, and I can hear you say
Oh-oh, I miss you
Oh-oh, I need you
I love you more than I did before
And if today I don't see, your face
Nothing's changed, no one could take your place
It gets harder every day
Say you love me more than you did before
And I'm sorry it's this way
But I'm coming home, I'll be coming home
And if you ask me, I will stay
I will stay, always stay
I never want to lose you and if I had to, I would choose you
So stay, please always stay
You're the one that I hold on to 'cause my heart would stop without you
I love you more than I did before
And if today I don't see your face
Nothing's changed, no one could take your place
It gets harder every day
Say you love me more than you did before
And I'm sorry that it's this way
But I'm coming home, I'll be coming home
And if you ask me, I will stay
I will stay
I'll always stay
And I love you more than I did before
And I'm sorry that it's this way
But I'm coming home, I'll be coming home
And if you ask, I will stay
I will stay
I will stay

I threw the walkie and covered my mouth with the back of my hand as my lips trembled as I completely lost it.

But I just kept on driving and Jack came and laid his head on my lap and I automatically started petting him.

Mason needed to know how I felt I at least owed him that.

I was truly sorry! I fucked up with him and I knew it!

That's what hurts the fucking most. I couldn't let him touch me or nothing until he really forgave me.

Plus I didn't really know if he did have sex with someone else or not and the way he's been acting with me or the way both been acting towards each other.

I just couldn't! My heart belongs to him and him only! That's a fact!

I guess I had the song on repeat and I tried to change it.

"COME THE FUCK ON CHANGE YOU STUPID FUCKING THING!" I started hitting the damn fucking radio and then I got beyond furious with the god damn thing and ripped it out and rolled down the fucking window and whipped it out of fucking window.

"YOU FUCKING WON'T WORK I WILL MAKE SURE IT DOESN'T WORK PERMANENTLY! TAKE THAT YOU PIECE OF SHIT RADIO!" I was beyond furious and I started speeding up now and floating through gears.

I needed speed now! I didn't have my safe place and I was tracking it again.

I put the light on top of the truck and I started whipping around vehicles.

Mother fuckers better stay out of my fucking way! I was on a fucking mission again.

No music to fucking distract me.

       Edward pov

"OH HOLY FUCKING HELL! NOT FUCKING NOW PUNCH! COME ON THIS CAN'T BE FUCKING HAPPENING TO ME!" She ripped out my radio out of my truck and whipped it out the fucking window.

All I could think of is it quick working and now this shit and she figured out the light on my fucking truck.

I stuck back here in this rental fucking truck. I was hitting the back of my head against the fucking seat.

That song tore my heart apart. I was slapping the fucking steering wheel when I heard her sang it that way and crying like that.

She knows God damn it! I trust her but the forgiving her for what she did to me is the hardest part for me.

It really fucking hurt me God damn it and she keeps telling she sorry.

I started crying. I know I don't want to lose her just like she doesn't want to lose me.

I completely understand her and me not wanting to her and we not talk about how we feel about each other.

Why does it always take her to point things out to me like this.

She feels empty inside right now and without her safe place and our connection being static I can understand totally about the lost part.

Because I feel the lost feeling with her too. It really fucking sucks too and I really hated it.

All I could do is try to keep up or her to give me a sign or clue of where we're going.

Oh she gave me clues through the fucking walkie alright.

I hated one words and now she was sending me images of exit signs.

So this was how it was going to be and now the gas station she was at.

I shake my head. I finally got there and walked into the camper and shut the door behind me.

"Did my fucking cd player quit working Punch?" I asked her.

"You can say that and it pissed me off or should I say made me beyond furious!" I jumped when she told me that.

"Okay, let me go in here and see if I can get a new one and I will install it in my truck for you!" I told her.

"Thank you Mason! I don't want to have to fuck up your baby!" I whipped my head around and looked at her.

"You wouldn't dare!" I told her. She tilted her head and gave me that look.

"Oh but Mason but I thought you knew me?" My eyes widened. I glupped.

"Oh shit! What the hell did I do Punch to make you this fucking furious at me and yes I do know you. What the fuck did I do to you?" I asked her.

She tilted her head. "Hmm, what did you do Mason? Figure it out yourself because I know you already did!" I hurried and walked out of the camper and walked into the truck stop she actually went to.

Fuck! I didn't think it make her furious with me. I found the radios and grabbed the on with the cd player and went and paid for it and went and made coffee first and boy did I needed it right now.

Once it was made I made both of us a fucking cup and handed her one and I walked out and I grabbed my tools and went to work.

       Bella pov

I was finally calming down and I everything started to feel funny and I could feel myself fall sideways off the bench I was sitting on next to the table.

I could hear and see Jack in front of me and he was barking and running in a fast circle until my head hit the floor of the camper and everything went black.

        Edward pov

All of a sudden Jack was barking like something was wrong and I jumped out of the truck and I heard a loud thud and I ran to the camper and whipped the doors open.

Punch was on the floor and hers eyes were closed and Jack was barking at me and I ran inside and kneeled down beside her.

"Punch!" I called out and nothing and I put to fingers over her neck to check her pulse.

I collapsed to the ground in relief she was still alive.

I had my hand over my heart trying to catch my breath.

Oh my fucking God I can't lose her like that again not now when I just got her back!

Tears fell from my eyes. It takes this for me to realize this. Wow!

I looked down on at her. "I'm sorry so sorry Punch!" I started running my fingers through her hair.

I started to sang to her.

When I get blue, I get dark blue
When I have one, I always have a few
When I get gone, I get real gone
When I get it wrong, I get it real wrong
I'm out tonight, and I'm feelin' like I should call you up
Maybe take a shot that you're wide awake at a quarter to three
Made you lookin' through your camera roll
The tequila's startin' to take a toll
I was hopin', baby, maybe you'd be
As messed up as me and all alone
And all of your friends have all gone home
And you hate that the truth
Is nobody leaves your head and your heart, and your bed and your sheets
As messed up as me
As messed up as me
When you get mad, you stay that way
And you always say you're doin' okay
But we both know it's probably a lie
And you're fallin' to pieces on the inside
And you're out tonight like you always are
You're dressed to kill, and your lips are red, and misery still loves company
Are you as messed up as me and all alone?
And all of your friends have all gone home
And you hate that the truth
Is nobody leaves your head and your heart, and your bed and your sheets
As messed up as
Me and you (me and you)
When we used to (we used to)
Paint this town, burn it down and go 'round for 'round for 'round
Hey, what are you doin' right now?
I'm out tonight, and I'm feelin' like I should call you up
Maybe take a shot that you're wide awake at a quarter to three
As messed up as me and all alone
And all of your friends have all gone home
And you hate that the truth
Is nobody leaves your head and your heart, and your bed and your sheets
As messed up as me
As messed up as me

I cupped the side of her face. "I forgive you Punch!" I gasped when she leaned into my touch and I felt the shock go through my body.

I closed my eyes and losted it and I leaned my forehead against hers.

"I'm here Punch! Your safe my girl!" I pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead like I used to when we were just best friends.

I missed this so much with her. I sat up and braced my back against the cupboard and put her head on my lap.

I just kept running my fingers through her hair and waited for her to wake up.

I was glad I locked up the truck before I came in here and locked the camper door.

She had a complete total fucking shut down on me. Now I just had to wait for her to wait for her to wake up.

Our connection was still static but the shocks were back and she had that safe place connection with me again.

I had to forgive her first. It wasn't her at all it was me. I wasn't ready for her to let her have that connection with me yet.

I do not own all the characters in the story Stephanie Meyers does

I own the rest of the characters and the story