One month had passed. There wasn't much time left, so you gathered your savings in search of your new equipment and as if fate called it, you found the right place, quite far from the tavern and the town centre...dangerous men gathered there, but you paid no attention to them, not when you were hidden in a cloak.

Without knowing it, you were returning to your old, dark pact and when you laid hands on your new sword, adrenaline coursed through your veins, as if to remember your dexterity with it.

You wondered if it also reached the baby's blood...but shook your head and put the rest of your stuff in a big bag to head back, before the sun set over the city.

As you had calculated, Guts hadn't returned to the inn yet. After a long breath, you knocked on the door and to welcome you, there was the smile of Noelia's father.

«How can I help you, my dear?» He was just as kind as his daughter, but because of what you had to do, you didn't dare ask her for help. Not this time.

«I need one of your horses. What's the fastest you have?» You got straight to the point without worrying about what he would think, but the old man just thought about your request and headed towards the stable.

«I understand. What time do you prefer it to be ready?»

With what you were carrying on your shoulders, he didn't need to know why, but was surprised it was just one, and not two.

«Tonight.» You had to leave before dawn and the older man nodded silently «I've some things to fix...don't say anything to Noelia, nor Guts.»

Although your actions sounded inexplicable, he didn't dare judge and gently, placed a hand on your shoulder in understanding.

«Whatever it is, seems to be very important to you...you have my word, Y/n.»

You were relieved to be able to count on him, even if he would do it behind his daughter's back; it wouldn't be the same for Guts and most likely, he would chase you to bring you back...

But, as you went down the stairs, you heard the swordsman's voice a few steps from you.

«...I don't care if she hates me. I can't tell it.» Guts wasn't alone apparently, but in the company of someone who wasn't in your line of sight.

Was he talking about you? If so, he was hiding something from you and couldn't help but listen to the conversation go on to find out what it was.

Until Puck came at high speed, making your ears ring with his flapping wings and deafening voice.

«Y/nnn~ What are you doing here–»

«Lower your voice!» You whispered and the flying elf covered his mouth with both hands, before looking towards the subject you were studying.

«Oooh I see, you're secretly spying on Guts, huh?» He smiled like an idiot, but you continued to stare at the man, this time walking away on his behalf with a composed attitude «Why don't you go to him, no doubt he's looking for ya!»

You stared at his genuine smile, ready to rip it away with your words.

«There's something you need to know...» You said firmly, causing Puck to become very confused and scared «But I can't do this alone. I need your help, because he won't have to know about it.»

You knew he wouldn't take it well, but to make your plan work, you had to tell the whole truth.

«P-pregnant?!?» Instantly, Puck recovered and flew towards your belly to eavesdrop on it «Aaah you're right, there's someone in here and you can't go anywhere in these conditions, Y/n!»

You tried not to smile at his naivety, honestly pregnancy wasn't something to be proud of, not when your life was filled with battles; as Puck enjoyed the moment on your shirt, you hid your terrible secret.

«Guts will be happy with this news, I'm sure! He really needs this baby, and you of course!»

For being a highly empathetic creature, Puck would undoubtedly discover your true intentions regarding the child's fate. And to not make him suffer about it, you decided to play this game a little bit.

«...that's why I want your silence, it must be a surprise.» You faked a smile with wide eyes as you told that bullshit to the poor elf «You know how Guts is...I don't want him to run away before this even comes out, haha!»

Puck burst out laughing, agreeing with you before taking the vow of silence on the argument, at least until the right time came. He was immensely over the moon and you would have used this opportunity not to be suspicious in front of your friends.

«Oh! Hello Guts and see ya around Y/n~»

As Puck flew away, you turned to the new arrival. He didn't seem to have heard anything of what you were talking about, on the contrary he was busy studying your head critically.

«Mpf, you're back to your old style.» He chuckled slightly when noticed your very short hair, exactly like at your first meeting «It suits you more frankly, as well as attracting less attention.»

You rolled your eyes, Guts would be jealous of you even if you weren't a female, taking possession of you had made him more confident...

«Your eye hasn't changed since the last time either.» You joked nodding towards his closed eye, but Guts was in a good mood to take it badly «You're not out as usual, something happened?»

«I'll stay out all night tomorrow and be back before dawn.» When he said it, you stored that information in your mind, so that you could act accordingly and change your plans at the last second.

«That's why I'm here. I need to talk to you, Y/n.»

In that moment, it was as if he had backed you into a corner, as there was nothing else to see but his magnificent figure. You hadn't forgotten what happened between you two and honestly, you hadn't stopped thinking about him.

«...what you want to tell me?» Guts sensed your discomfort and though he wanted to, he didn't try to touch you.

«I won't stay here much longer.» He spoke in a serious tone, catching your attention on his tense lips «I haven't decided when yet. I want to know what you think and if you want to come with me...»

Ah dammit, you thought in the next second. This wasn't expected and now your times became more shorter. Guts took your hesitation as if you were holding words in your throat, as if something was scaring you.

«You don't have to force yourself–»

«It's not this.» You stopped him with a hand on his armor, as you felt like you were falling to the ground. You had enough of these stupors.

«How can I tell him that I'm like this for a fucking child?! This is all so absurd.»

«Y/n.»

You quickly looked up at him and from then on, you knew you were fucked, because your eyes were about to swell.

«Don't go away tonight...please Guts, stay with me.»

Or, you would have run away from him forever. You almost begged him, not thinking about whether you were being pathetic or not, as the final proof that he truly loved you, he had to choose you over anything else...

But your hope was extinguished when you felt his hands push you away with a gentle, but brutal touch.

«I promise I'll tell you about it. But for now, you have to trust me.»

You blocked your tears and in their place, a blank expression fell on your face. You were the only one who was screwed, deluding yourself that you could change the cards of your life with stupid friendships, kindness, and love...

You had been true from the beginning. But what you had received was just falsehood and Guts proved it to you right in that moment, rejecting you.

«Ok, it's your duty after all.» You quickly freed yourself from him and when he tried to approach you again, you avoided him like he was the plague himself, with a quick wave of the hand.

«Didn't you hear me? Don't waste your time here. You must go, Black Swordsman.»

Guts stared at you in silence, weakened by your sweet and desperate attempt to stop him. But he couldn't allow himself that, not when he had finally found who he was looking for all this time...

This just worsened your relationship, making you more wary of his selfishness.

Anyway, Guts hoped to come back and hold you like he had always wanted, after everything was settled...

But he didn't know this would be the last time he would see you again.

• • •

The night was approaching, pushing aside the sun as you had done with your feelings. Without hesitation, you waited for the city to fall asleep, to put on your new combat uniform and strap the sword behind your back. This way, whether your belly was growing or not didn't matter anymore, since it was covered in a thick layer of iron.

You took some bags. The journey was long, but you couldn't wait for the contractions to arrive...

«I'll return to the place where my mother was buried, under the tree with pink flowers...that's where I will kill the baby and put an end to its future suffering.»

This was your decision. And you were ready to follow it, riding your horse, if you hadn't noticed a shadow behind you.

«What are you doing here...» You hadn't turned around yet, but judging by the light and brisk step, it wasn't a man «You should be in bed, Noelia.»

She hadn't spoken yet, as the other girl was focused on admiring a Y/n she had never seen before. With that shiny armor and deep face, she was clearly no longer looking at a woman, but a goddess.

«I couldn't sleep. But I did well, why the hell are you doing all this?» Her voice trembled and her eyes already showed the first signs of despair «You can't leave us...and can't leave Guts, you love each other!»

You gave a light pat on the horse's head to calm him down, remembering that made you feel worse again.

«True. I loved him before this happened.» You looked her, in reference to the unwanted fruit of your union with the warrior «We're not ready for a son...and I won't let this world ruin him like it did us.»

At that point, Noelia understood perfectly what you meant with those words and cried in silence; she approached your dark horse and stroked it gently, so majestic and powerful just like you.

But also an animal would have turned its face up at that cruel gesture...

«I made a promise, and I won't break it.» The redhead announced with apparent firmness «But you have to promise me, you will come back. No matter what. Promise Y/n!»

You couldn't guarantee that. With a sudden gesture, Noelia pulled your right forearm, jerking it as if she wanted to throw you off the horse, but didn't happen.

«H-how will I be able to face Guts from now on...this is so terrible...»

Seeing her so worried about you opened a hole in your heart, it wasn't right for her to suffer like this for you.

You placed your armored hand on her shoulder, as you had always done when you two worked together. But that joy was over and nothing would stay the same as before.

«Do what's right for you. For everything you have done for me, I will never forget it. Thank you, Noelia.»

You leaned down just enough to leave a kiss on her ginger head and that was the drop which broke the camel's back, now full of tears. Noelia hoped to reciprocate, but your horse had already started to travel the path you had set, barely illuminated by the moonlight.

«See ya, Y/n.»

This wouldn't have been a goodbye, not for her. When was in her bedroom again, she prayed you had returned home safely, along with the wonderful newborn.

• • ● • •

Somewhere in the Midland, not far from Falconia

• • •

Another week passed. According to your calculations, the cherry tree must have been in bloom when you arrived; regarding your condition, you were in your second month of gestation.

The sun was shining that day and after some kilometers, you stopped to let your horse drink. Wind had been patient with you, as well as incredibly fast...in a way, its fierce eyes reminded you of Guts' and you looked away when thought of him.

You did that day and night. Even a month later, your feelings for him hadn't faded.

You wondered what his reaction had been. And if he thought about you, what if he was already on your trail?

Did he know the truth?

Sometimes, you imagined seeing him in front of you with his usual, serious look, as he vowed to bring you back. But never happened and also now, you waited for the imminent...

But there, you blinked as a small light hit your eye.

«...Guts??»

You thought it was the reflection of some metal. Instead, it came from the surface of the river you stopped next to. Intrigued, you went to look closer and underwater, you picked up a small and strange object.

At first glance, it looked like a tiny, bluish green stone, similar to an egg. When you looked more carefully, this seemed to have disturbing ridges, similar to a crooked face.

«...what the hell is this?»

You turned it over and over, and at that point, you frozed when an eye looked at you.

That's when the horse's neigh brought you back to reality and there, you decided what to do...something was wrong with it and having in your hands, definitely didn't lead to anything good.

You threw it to the ground. But because of that, the stone made an expression of pain you couldn't see and got back on the road, forgetting that weird sensation...

A new owner had appeared among humanity.

• • ● • •

𝑇𝐻𝐸 𝐸𝑁𝐷 - 𝑃𝐴𝑅𝑇 𝑂𝑁𝐸