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..........M.E.R.I.D.I.A.N......L.I.G.H.T.S..........

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December 6, 2009

I watched from the sidelines as these world-famous skaters went through the Closing Ceremony for the Grand Prix Final Gala Exhibition. They all bowed to each side of the rink prompting loud cheers from the stands.

The noise wasn't able to disrupt my persistent daze.

A while ago, Yuzuru threw my world off its axis.

...

Am I overreacting?

...

It's probably nothing.

...

Every time I tried to shake it off, this nagging feeling just came crashing back in my chest.

I shook my head and lightly slapped my cheeks.

...

No, it's nothing.

It's only a Friend thing.

...

But...

...

I didn't know what to think of it.

It's probably what friends did.

Other... foreign... friends.

I mean, my guy friends back in the Philippines didn't kiss me - even cheeks to cheeks, orBeso, the word in Tagalog - even when we knew each other for years. They didn't have the nerve to do so because while I did give out hugs, I was quite averse when it came to kissing.

True, I did like to kiss Shoma.

But he's a kid. I love kids.

Kids are ok to kiss. That's like a memorandum for all the Adults out there.

On the other hand... Yuzuru was also a kid, in a way. However, he's much older than Shoma. He's already a middle-aged teen for Christ's sake.

Yuzuru's maturity was off the bounds. He had this goofy and dorky side in him but when it came to serious matters, one would think they're dealing with a full grown man instead of a teenager.

This was so confusing.

A warm hand settled on the top of my head. With a jolt, I looked up and saw the person in mind.

"Ready to go?" Yuzuru smiled down at me, without a care for the world.

Whilst I was here stressing about this matter, he's out there enjoying and being his care-free self. I wanted to knock myself on the head for worrying about nothing.

Yuzuru's hand slid from my head, down to my cheek for a moment, before grasping my hand once again in a quite familiar manner already. He then pulled me on as we strolled towards the backstage area.

I sneaked a discreet glance at our entwined hands. I kept on getting mixed signals with this guy.

Is this really only a Friend thing?

Or, was there something more?

In a way, I would like to confront him about it. It's fine if he's only doing these things as a friend. However, if there was some underlying reason - a romantic notion - in his side... then I would have to talk to him about it.

I like Yuzuru as a Friend.

I didn't like Yuzuru as something more.

With that thought firmly in mind, I pulled Yuzuru to a stop. We were currently in a deserted offside corridor that led to one of the resting areas where Yumi and Coach Nanami were waiting.

"Yuzuru... about earlier..." I hesitated. I didn't want to make things awkward just in case I'm entirely wrong about the matter.

"Earlier?" Yuzuru appeared confused.

"You know... the..." I gestured at my forehead distractedly. What happened earlier was clearly nagging at me. I didn't like this feeling. My expression was downcast as this matter heavily weighed on my mind.

Yuzuru went silent for a moment as he took in my state. He raised his hand and gently wiped my forehead with his thumb.

"This?"

Yuzuru laid another kiss on my forehead, leading me to emit a startled gasp. Wide-and-vulnerable peach blossom eyes met the narrowed-yet-amused phoenix eyes.

"What's wrong?" Yuzuru had the gall to ask me.

"You... you..." I indignantly stuttered. A faint pink glow dusted my entire face.

"Me what?" He had a nonchalant look on him.

"Why did you do that?" my voice came out in a tiny whisper. Him acting normally after doing these acts shattered my confidence.

Am I really overreacting?

"I wanted to kiss you, so I kissed you."

"It's not right. We're friends."

"Exactly." Yuzuru's confused gaze bore in my own. "That's why I'm comfortable enough to do it. Is there something wrong with that?"

"But..." I bit my lip. This wasn't going in the direction I had expected it to go. Maybe I was really acting weird. "Do you do this to your... other friends?"

"No."

"Then why-"

"You're the one I'm closest to," Yuzuru interrupted me. "Did I make you uncomfortable?"

"Ah, a littl-"

"It's my first time becoming this close with someone. I'm not making you uncomfortable, right?" Yuzuru asked, uncertainly. His words had gone a bit weak in the end as if he was afraid of being rejected.

My heart tugged at the sight.

"I mean... It's not-... It's not Not ok... As a friend... I'm not making any sense am I?" I tried to explain but I kept on getting flustered and losing my train of thought as I was beset by Yuzuru's arresting gaze.

"Good. You think too much." Yuzuru grinned humorously before draping his arm around my shoulders and leading my perplexed self towards the resting area.

With my mind still whirling around in conflict, I missed the strange blank expression that covered Yuzuru's face.

*****

It was already past midnight when the black van came up the hotel's driveway.

The athletes that participated in the GPF were sponsored by the organizing committee and was given rooms in this grand hotel for the entire duration of the competition.

I was able to book a deluxe room a day earlier despite the busy season. It was good thinking on our part because the Gala Exhibition ended late at night. It would be too late to head back to Nagoya.

Yuzuru was allocated with two rooms by the organizing committee. Two double bedrooms to be exact. One for the athlete, and the second room for the coaches and other entourage members.

Yumi tried to offer by letting me room with them since, technically, there was one extra bed. Yuzuru was staying alone in his room, so Yumi offered that she'll room with Yuzuru tonight and I'll room with Coach Nanami.

However, I couldn't intrude any longer. They already managed to give me a backstage pass, it would be too much for me if I accepted their offer. Even though they were willing, I just couldn't.

Coach Nanami was napping on one of the beds, so Yumi's voice was hushed when she talked to me.

I checked my phone and saw a few missed calls.

"I better check up on my mom. She's probably asleep by now."

"Tell your Mom that I said hi, alright? I won't be bothering you anymore, it's pretty late. I'll chat her up online. Yuzu, accompany her back."

I set my lips in a firm line lest I let out a laugh. Yuzuru quietly snickered at the side.

"Ok, thank you Yumi-san. I'll get going." I bowed to her before stepping out of their hotel room. Yuzuru followed soon after. We shared a smile as we trekked up the hallway towards the elevator.

"Our moms are more high-tech than us," I joked around causing him to laugh. The elevator opened then we stepped in. "You think we should get social media?"

"Hm..." He cocked his head with a hint of distaste. "I'm not a fan of those sites."

"Me neither. But texting is getting pretty expensive nowadays. Especially in our case."

"Is there, like, a private social media then? Just for chatting or calling?"

The elevator door opened.

"I'll check it out." I winked with a playful smile.

We headed down the hallway before stopping in front of my hotel room.

"This is your stop." Yuzuru placed his hands in his pockets as he smiled.

"This is my stop." I chuckled at his weird wordings and nodded, then I jerked my head up as I remembered something. I glanced at my watch.

It read 12:35 am.

"Just wait a sec'." I held up a finger as I told him to stay still before changing my mind as I remembered where we were. I quickly glanced around the hallway, when I saw that we're alone, I beckoned him to go inside with me. Yuzuru was a little confused but happily obliged.

It wouldn't do for a Grand Prix Final Champion to be caught standing around in front of a hotel room late at night in such a public place. Let alone going into a hotel room with a girl.

The scandal that would follow would be tremendous.

I hurriedly went inside the room and dug around the cabinet. Finally, I took out a brightly colored package with a ribbon placed on it.

His eyes brightened up in curiosity as he saw the neat package in my hands.

"Happy Birthday!" I yelled out in English. I grinned happily as I presented my gift to him.

Yuzuru laughed loudly before accepting the package.

"Can I?" his excited movements halted for a moment as he asked me.

"Sure."

He immediately tore the wrapping paper apart to get to the gift.

"Woah!" his delighted exclamation left my hanging heart drop down in relief. I was afraid that he wouldn't like my gift.

Yuzuru whole face lit up as he held the cuddly Pooh tissue box in his hands.

"I didn't exactly know what to give you. Then I saw that tissue holder that Coach Nanami always carries around. You like Pooh, right? So, why not?" I sheepishly twirled a lock of my hair as I explained.

"Thanks!" He gathered me in for a squeezing embrace.

We stayed like that for a while, before I moved back slightly and looked up at this taller than ever guy. His hands were still settled comfortably around my waist.

"I'm glad that you liked it." I smiled softly as I readjusted his scarf. "I was pretty nervous that you wouldn't."

"Are you kidding? I love it." His face neared mine as he bends down slightly before planting his lips at the side of my head. "Thank you."

I blushed a little before smiling happily up at him.

"So, the hugs had now successfully evolved to kisses, huh?" I shook my head in exasperation.

"Is it too much?" Yuzuru's earnest gaze turned to me.

"Hm...I think... it's alright. " I seriously pondered at this. "We are friends, right?"

I meant to say it in a light and joking manner, but the tone at the end of my question held a sense of uncertainty in it.

What happened earlier made it clear that Yuzuru didn't like me as more than that. More than Friends.

I was very relieved by that.

However, I was still uncertain as I kept on getting confused by the signals that he was raising up. Signals that I'm sure didn't exist in the first place.

I was just thinking too much from it.

Creating smoke when there was none.

"If we're not friends, then what are we?" Yuzuru lightly pinched my cheek while smirking.

*****

February 12, 2010

My hands were clammy as I clumsily held the flagpole representing my country.

I sighed deeply as I tried to calm down my rapidly beating heart.

"Philippines, you're up next. Please stand in line and wait for the signal," The organizer informed us, leading the way to our designated starting point.

The Philippine team only had four people. The team consisted of Coach Edmund, a head member in the Philippine Support Team, and a spokesperson in the Philippine Figure Skating Society.

The last was, of course, me. The flag bearer.

I could hear them shuffling around behind me as anxiety also ate at them. Finally, the signal went up and we proceeded to do the parade.

It was an overwhelming experience.

We were greeted by the sight of thousands of people in the stands, cheering for the athletes parading around the oval stadium.

I led the way, a few paces ahead of my team, as we went around the specific path that the organizers dictated to us earlier.

Various emotions that I couldn't exactly comprehend bombarded me at that moment. I felt a chill of amazement, anxiety, fright, and happiness.

It was very confusing.

Confusing enough that it almost affected my mindset.

That's why I did my best and paid the utmost attention to the path I was walking lest I fall, or worse, drop the flagpole from my hands that would then let me drown in utter embarrassment.

Nope.

Not happening.

The stadium was filled with deafening cheers. As the path was nearing to an end, I idly wondered where my family was currently seated.

Several moments later, after the Parade of Athletes. The event commenced and the Olympic Torch was lit.

It was just then that I truly felt the magnitude of the event that I was participating in.

Goosebumps ran through my entire body.

In my whole life, I never expected to go this far. To be able to participate in the Olympics.

A sense of duty fell upon my being as I stood there, staring at this humongous torch blazing ferociously amidst the darkened environment. I vowed then and there that I would give it my all in this year's Olympics.

For Glory and For Honor.

*****

"Ugh." I groaned from my comfy bed as my alarm blared around the room.

The ceremony ended late at night and the organization committee immediately led the athletes and their respective teams to the Athlete's Village where the competitive teams would be housed for the duration of the Olympics.

Before departing the Philippines, my family decided that they wouldn't bother me during the Olympics. Their reasoning was that I needed to focus on this competition.

I felt a tad lonely, but I'm comforted by the idea that they're right there, cheering for me in the stands. I may not know where they were exactly, but their presence here alone was enough for me.

Suddenly, my stomach grumbled. Loudly.

I moaned in agony at my protesting stomach. All I wanted to do was sleep. My stomach clearly disagreed. My alarm did too.

"Tsk." I smacked my phone, turning off the alarm, before irritably getting off the bed.

After taking a bath and doing my morning rituals, I looked around the apartment studio for some food. There were only a few knick-knacks and fruits in the mini-fridge. Pacing around, I saw the comfort bag that was individually handed to each of the team members by the organizing committee.

Curious, I dug around the small comfort bag and found a few candies, a small key-chain depicting the Olympic logo, and a bunch of multi-colored square-like packages.

Absentmindedly, and still a bit groggy even after taking a nice cold shower, I opened one of the square-like packages.

Huh?

Why're there squashed balloons here?

I stretched the squashed balloon. It was actually quite narrow and lengthy. The balloon was strangely firm yet elastic. I played around with the balloon a bit before tossing it on the table.

Shrugging, I grabbed a random candy and popped it in my mouth as I headed out the door in search of food. It was still pretty early in the morning when I traversed through the corridors. Surprisingly enough, I passed by plenty of other athletes.

A majority were with their teammates as they chatted loudly, some nodded or smiled at me in greeting when they passed by, while a select few shot me this strange look of some kind. If I didn't know any better, they were kind of eyeing on me.

I was honestly weirded out.

Finally, I arrived at the food hall.

The food hall in the Olympic Village was open day and night, and most importantly, free of charge. Grabbing a plate, I immediately filled it with a few sausages, scrambled eggs, potatoes, and bread.

There were a few people in the food hall occupying some of the tables. I was glancing around for an empty table when I caught sight of a certain familiar individual. His eyes met mine as well.

"Good morning. Miss Philippines, right?" Evan smiled, grabbing a plate himself and filled it with food. He grabbed a bottle of juice, before grabbing another bottle again as he saw me eyeing it. I thanked him as he handed the bottle over.

"Good morning," I greeted back, before once again searching for a table. I didn't mind as he followed my tracks as we continued to converse. "Yep, Mister... America... American. Ok, never mind, it sounds way too much like Captain America. Ok, I'm so corny. Ignore me, please," I fumbled, flushing. I would be hitting my head right about now if my hands were free.

Evan laughed loudly.

He's quite the gorgeous guy. His smile just managed to enhance his features in an extraordinarily rugged way. I closed my eyes painfully in embarrassment before a chuckle eventually escaped my lips.

Somehow, I was comfortable with his presence.

We just kind of clicked.

No, it wasn't those heart-stopping moments like those cheesy novels described when you finally meet your one true love. It was more like you found an old friend again and had the joy of reconnecting.

"And I was like, what?" Evan had a weird look on his face as he recounted his tale of a middle-aged cop, a slobbery bulldog, and him. Don't ask.

Cracking up once again, I tried to get my breath back together as I wiped the amused tears from my eyes. I think we were chatting non-stop for about half an hour already before someone interrupted us.

"Well, well. Lookie here," a sassy voice called out.

I glanced over and, subsequently, my eyes widened in awe as I recognized the lithe man who confidently strode towards our table.

"Johnny." Evan smiled and raised a hand in greeting.

It was the one, the only, Johnny Weir.

I was a big fan of his, starting when I first saw his Ave Maria program back in '08. He was so elegant when he did that program in the Gala Exhibition.

"Hey Evan," the beautiful guy greeted back before laying his plate daintily on the table and sitting down like a queen, "mind if I join?"

This guy was just pure awesomeness.

"No, not at all. Please, do sit," Evan sarcastically joked around as Johnny laughed in response. I stifled the giggle that threatened to leave me.

"So..." Johnny dragged out his word as he eyed Evan before glancing in my direction. "Who's this?" He wiggled his brows in teasing. Before Evan could get the chance to introduce us, I took the initiative myself. I really would love to get to know Johnny Weir.

"Hello, I'm Elana." I held out a hand.

"Johnny. It's very nice to meet you," he shook my hand and replied with sincerity. "You work fast," Johnny joked at Evan, who was currently drinking his juice, subsequently causing him to choke on it.

I laughed loudly as I helped pat Evan's back. I didn't mind the attitude, I actually love Johnny's sassy personality. It was like a breath of fresh air from the usual polite conversations that new acquaintances often project.

"What sport are you in?" Johnny curiously asked, ignoring the scowling Evan at our side.

"Figure skating." I was very much amused at their interactions.

"Oh? I am too."

"I know. I really love your programs. Ave Maria was just heavenly."

"Aw! Thank you, love." For a guy his size, it was quite surprising to watch as Johnny ate a lot. Even now, he's munching on bread and butter. "You know what? I like you." He narrowed his eyes at me, in a good gestured way.

"I like you too." I chuckled, feeling the beginning of a nice, fun, and genuine friendship with these guys.

*****

"Skaters, there is one minute remaining for this practice session."

I glided around the ice, milking the time I had left before we were forced to leave the rink. Readying my stance, I gracefully circled before launching off to a triple Axel.

Whirling around mid-air gave off an otherworldly feeling. It would only last for a second, but it gave a person an addicting experience, especially when you landed cleanly and with such cat-like precision.

Ice flecks rose as I swiftly landed.

I twizzled and proceeded to do my free skate step sequence whilst the time was ticking off towards the end of our practice. When the time finally ran out, each of the skaters that were in my practice time bowed to each side of the rink which then elicited applause from the stands.

There were quite a lot of people in the audience that attended my time slot. That was probably because I was in the same time slot as Asada Mao and Kim Yuna. The two favorites in this year's Olympics.

Skating towards the rink side, I grabbed my tumbler and took a quick swig before wiping my nose with a tissue. The cold atmosphere in the rink kind of irritates the nose that's why you would often see professional skaters, especially those who spent hours on the ice, having these so-called runny noses.

"Good job out there." Coach Edmund patted my shoulder and handed my blade covers. Smiling in thanks, I got another tissue to wipe my nose then threw it in the trash bag before accepting the blade covers. I was leaning on the ledge as I put on the covers when the other skaters in my time slot came through the entrance.

I glanced up just in time to see Mao looking at me. We both smiled reflexively and greeted each other simultaneously.

"Hi," Mao greeted in a heavy English tone.

"Hello," likewise, I greeted in fluent Japanese.

"Oh, you speak Japanese," Mao's surprised words were more of a statement rather than a question. She leaned forward as she covered her skates.

I chuckled.

"Yes, I do speak Japanese."

"That's nice. I'm Mao, by the way." She held out her hand which I shook immediately.

"I'm Elana. I actually know of you." At Mao's inquisitive gaze, I explained further, "I'm a member of the Grand Prix Tokai SC. I'm good friends with Shoma, and I also know Coach Higuchi and Coach Yamada. But they're not my coach," I added right after, to dispel any misunderstanding.

"Wow, really?" Mao smiled cheerfully. We continued to chat as we headed towards the locker rooms. "How's Shoma? It's been a long time since I saw that kid. I miss the coaches back in Tokai."

"Shoma's doing good. He's improving way too fast. He's also winning competitions left and right," I praised Shoma like a dutiful *Ate that I was.

"I knew Shoma would be great. He has a lot of potential."

"I totally agree. Give it a few years, no doubt he'll be joining Worlds and the GPF."

We just entered the locker room when I bumped into Kim Yuna.

"Sorry," I said instinctively, bowing my head.

Yuna just tightened her lips and nodded back then proceeded on her way.

I was normally patient and understanding when it came to these unintended altercations, but it rubbed me off the wrong way. I guess I was a bit chagrined with the way she's acting. Even before in GPF, she also acted in that same impatient manner.

Admittedly, I did have a fault in it too being my usual clumsy self.

"Uh, don't mind her." Mao noticed the slight as well. She just smiled timidly at my expression. "She's alright to be with. I guess, she's just stressed out."

I sighed in understanding.

All the athletes were high strung in the Olympics. Some were just more talented in calming their minds or hiding their nervousness. This was such an important event that only happened every four years. It couldn't be helped.

"So, you train in Nagoya?" Mao asked. She's already sitting on a long bench with her suitcase beside her. On the other hand, I was still organizing my things and wiping my blades for maintenance.

"Yeah, I think I've been visiting Japan for... four... five years?" I had a pondering look as I tried to calculate how many years it had been since my skating career had its jump start.

"And you know how to speak Japanese then?"

"No." I laughed incredulously while shaking my head. "I knew a few words but that's about it."

"I know the feeling." Mao excitedly turned on her seat. "When I left Japan and trained in other countries, I really had a hard time because I mostly only know Japanese."

"It's frustrating, right?"

We laughed as we bonded over our difficulties of overcoming the language barrier. A few moments later, with our things all set and ready, we departed off towards the provided buses.

We continued to chat on as we made our way to the entrance.

"I miss Japan," Mao said wistfully. "I mean, I do live there, but I'm often away. Too busy training."

"Likewise, the Philippines will always have my heart. Don't you participate in ice shows though? I saw the recording on TV."

"Yeah, my agency signs me up in ice shows."

"Your agency?"

Mao nodded, biting her lip.

I got a notification from my phone. Taking it out from my pocket, I opened it and saw a message from Yuzuru.

How are you? It's morning there right?

I smiled at the message before typing in a reply.

Afternoon. Just finished practicing. Planning to take a nice, long, warm bath in that heavenly bathtub in my room. <3

Sending the message, I quickly turned to Mao as she continued speaking.

"It's required for us to do ice shows as part of the contract. Of course, we can refuse if we wanted to."

"Oh, that's tough."

"It's a bit tiring, but also fun." Mao shrugged with a grin on her face.

"Speaking of ice shows, do you know Yuzuru?" I got a little curious. Yuzuru was also doing ice shows and those were televised in Japan. However, I only watched a few recordings. I didn't know if Mao and Yuzuru met yet.

"Yuzu? Hanyu Yuzuru? Yes, I met him several times. Why, you know him?" Mao's eyes widened in interest.

"I'm actually texting him right now." I chuckled, showing my phone to Mao. Just in time, another notification came through.

Quickly opening the message, my lips quirked up in mirth.

I thought you don't like warm baths? Let's go to an onsen when you get back.

"Sorry." I gestured at the phone. Mao waved her hand.

"Go ahead."

I just discovered the joys of warm baths. It's so relaxing. xoxo

I giggled silently as I typed in my next message immediately after.

And sure! your pay? Haha! :D

If you go to Sendai then I'll pay for everything. ;)

Dude, you better ready, lol!~ >:)

Still smiling, I noticed Mao observing on the side in interest.

"You're close with Yuzu?" Mao asked.

"Pretty much," I replied in affirmative. Another set of notifications rang out from my phone. "As you can see, he's pretty talkative. It would be hard not to be close to him." I chuckled as I opened the new messages.

When it came to friends, Yuzuru had taken the number one spot on my close friends' list. Sure, I was still close to my friends back in the Philippines. However, we took our own paths and separated in our own ways. My friends went to different colleges and enrolled in different courses.

It's inevitable that we would meet and have a new set of friends and make new unforgettable experiences. It's sad because, in a way, we're gradually drifting apart. I knew though, that I would always consider them as my friends.

"That's unusual for Yuzu," I heard Mao mutter.

"What?"

"Ah, well. As I said, I met Yuzu in ice shows." Mao shrugged, before smiling at me with a strange expression. "Yuzuru's very respectful. A little too respectful at times. It's nice to know that he could act like any other ordinary kid."

Respectful?

I stifled a snicker as I remembered Yuzuru's quite obstinate nature. He could be one sarcastic fellow if he wanted to.

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..........M.E.R.I.D.I.A.N......L.I.G.H.T.S..........

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TERMS:

Ate: Older Sister

Beso / Beso-Beso: Cheeks to Cheeks Kissing

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(The Olympics will kick start Elana's social life, in a sense.)

(By the way, I don't have any problems with Yuna. She's an amazing skater. Admittedly not my favorite, but still amazing. However, this is Fanfiction. I don't want every skater to get along well with Elana. You could say that I'm doing this to create more diversity when it came to my characters.)

(If you enjoyed reading this chapter, please do vote. It's like my fuel when it comes to writing. Of course, one other major fuel of mine is Yuzuru.)

(Just look how adorable he is!~)

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