Chapter theme : Me without you - Ashley Tisdale

"Isn't it fucked up how the people we love get to hurt us the most?" Reika said as she poured me a glass of beer.

It's already midnight, the neighborhood is asleep, and yet, Reika and I are still in the living room, surrounded by bottles of beer and snacks, drinking our sorrows out.

"Pain is part of the package when it comes to love." I shrugged as I spoiled myself on Buffalo Wings. Thank God for their 24-hour service.

Reika drank straight out of the bottle, ignoring the alcohol slipping from the side of her lips. I couldn't count how many bottles we've had, not including the glasses of wine from earlier's so-called celebration.

She stopped drinking just to catch her breath, then wiped her lips with the back of her hand.

"I like seeing you smile and laugh, pero 'yung kanina... iba 'yon eh," she said while looking straight ahead, holding the bottle as if it's her most prized possession.

"Did I overdo it?" I chuckled as I took a sip of beer, ignoring its bitter taste. "I wanted to look happy and unbothered by having fun."

"Kilala na kasi kita kaya siguro naramdaman kong peke 'yong mga ngiti at tawa mo." Reika shrugged. "You rarely laugh and smile after all."

Natawa ako sa sinabi niya at pabiro siyang binato ng buto. "Hey, I smile and laugh all the time! Kayo lang ang nagbabansag sa aking bato o multo."

"Parang hanggang sa isip mo lang ginagawa 'yon eh!" she argued kaya natawa na lang ako.

Reika and I are both too drunk already. We're more stubborn than before. Arguing is pointless.

"Hay..." Reika heaved a sigh as she continued drinking.

"Easy..." paalala ko. Mamaya maospital pa kami sa sobrang pag-inom. Wag naman.

"Damn, it's hard to be a member of the broken hearts club," she said.

I chuckled knowing Sober Reika wouldn't say such thing.

"I'm glad you stayed," pag-amin ko. Tutal pareho na kaming lasing at naglalabasan ng hinanakit, sasabihin ko na lang ang mga bagay na nahihiya akong ipahayag sa kanya.

"In Filimon Heights?" It was her turn to chuckle.

Nagpatuloy siya sa pag-inom na para bang walang pakialam sa mundo.

"Sinabi mo sa akin noon na kaya ka lang nandito sa Filimon Heights para sundan at gantihan si Riley, sabi mo pa ilang buwan ka lang na mananatili rito. I got worried at first kasi attached na ako sa presence mo, kaya masaya ako na hanggang ngayon nandito ka pa rin."

Huminto si Reika sa pag-inom dahil sa mga sinabi ko. Pinunasan niyang muli ang labi at patawa-tawang tumingin sa akin.

"Ampota, alangan ba naman iwan kita! Hoy Elemeto, Reika De Juan never abandons!" aniya na para bang galit kasi tinuro-turo pa ako.

"I sure hope it stays that way." I smiled at her. At the back of my mind, I'm still scared of how she'd react once she finds out my connection to her biological father. 

She heaved a sigh and scratched her head. "Alam mo kasi, bakit pa ako aalis kung masaya akong kasama ka at sina Magno? Pucha, at least dito hindi ako mag-isa! Noong high school, marami akong barkada at kainuman pero wala naman sa kanila ang masasabi kong kaibigan talaga. Mag-isa lang ako sa Wilkinson kaya bakit pa ako babalik doon? Why should I continue my independent facade when you and the guys are here?"

Dahil sa mga sinabing iyon ni Reika ay kusang pumatak ang luha ko.

Pinunasan ko ang luha ko at uminom na lamang ulit. 

Huminga ako nang malalim at muling napatangin sa kanya.

"I used to have a best friend. We were like sisters from elementary to high school." I smiled at the memories of CJ. "We were so close that in my mind, I thought our friendship would last a lifetime. I always pictured my future with her, tapos biglang isang araw, wala na. Somewhere along the way, we drifted apart... and I don't want that to happen to us Rei."

I shook my head as my tears continued to escape my eyes. "I don't want to lose another friend, so whatever happens, sana 'wag na 'wag kang magagalit sa akin. I'm full of shit but I hope you'll stay."

Reika looked at me sharply. Tears were beginning to pool in her eyes. "Tangina ka, 'wag ka ngang umiyak! Kung full of shit ka, ano na lang ako?! Magagalit lang ako sa'yo kung jojowain mo si Riley!"

Napangiti ako sa sinabi niya pero sa kabila nito ay patuloy ang pagpatak ng luha ko. "Alam mo, naisip ko... okay lang pala na wala akong Haji Kazemi III, basta may Reika De Juan ako."

"Tangina ka, Silverianne." Narinig kong sumingshot-singhot si Reika. Nakita kong umiiyak na rin ito, pero imbes na punasan ang luha niya, uninom lang ito mula sa mismong bote.

Bumuntong-hininga siya nang maubos ang laman nito. Saka lang din niya pinunasan ang mga luha niya. "Basta, 'wag ka ring mang-iiwan. Kahit walang Riley Bognacia, basta may Silverianne Villafranca."

Reika heaved a deep sigh once again and stared at the ceiling. "Tangina mo, Haji Kazemi III! Mas tangina ka pa kaysa kay the IV! Isang napakalaking insulto niyan! Akala mo sino kang gwapo!"

Natawa ako habang nagpupunas pa rin ng luha. "Reika, gwapo talaga si Tres."

"Mas gwapo si Riley ko!" she screamed, making me flinch. 

"Pero wala nang mas ga-gwapo pa kay Warren," I argued.

Reika stilled and looked at me. 

All of a sudden, we both sighed and chuckled. 

"Warren," we spoke at the same time and nodded. At least we can both agree that Clint Warren Vasquez is the number one Papi of Filimon Heights.

****

"Sakit ng ulo ko," reklamo ni Reika at mula sa salamin ay nakita kong nagpagulong-gulong sa kama niya. It's 9 am pero wala sa amin ang bumabangon.

"Absent ka ulit?" tanong ko at tumango-tango naman siya. 

"Absent ka rin para patas tayo," aniya.

"Ok," sabi ko at agad naman itong napabangon.

"Seryoso?! Aabsent ka?" bulalas niya.

"We drank till 4 in the morning. I'll die if I go to school," giit ko.

"Uy, we should celebrate. First time mong umabsent," she chuckled.

"You better not invite you-know-who!" I joked.

"Hoy, kahit sa libing mo hindi ko siya iimbitahin!" giit niya. Pinatay pa ako ng leche.

Reika and I spent the entire day lying and eating around while watching netflix. Unfortunately, I still had to go work — ayoko naman kasing maabala pa ang kung sinong papalit sa akin sa shift kung a-absent ako nang biglaan.

"Sama ako," giit ni Reika habang nagbibihis ako. 

"Sasama eh nakahandusay ka lang diyan. Tulog ka lang para makapasok ka na bukas," giit ko at tumango-tango naman ito saka bumalik sa pagtulog.

***

Masakit ang ulo ko at mas sumama pa ang pakiramdam ko dahil sa sobrang ingay at neon lights sa tumatama sa mga mata ko. Gustong-gusto ko nang humandusay at matulog na lang pero sobrang dami ko pang kailangang gawin.

"Hoy! Ba't ka absent kanina?!" bulalas ni Colette nang bigla itong lumapit sa bar. Kinabahan ako bigla.

"Bakit? Nag long quiz ba kayo kanina? Did I miss something important?" I asked as my heartbeat began to race. 

"Wala naman, na miss lang kita." Colette just giggled and sat on the stool right in front of me. 

"'ll get you a mojito." I rolled my eyes. 

"Make it five with a tray, I'm with my soro sisters. Wanna hangout?" She grinned as she placed her elbows up the counter. 

"You do realize I'm at work right?" I raised an eyebrow.

"Just trying." She giggled.

Pagkakuha ng order niya, umalis agad si Colette. Napansin ko namang may dumating na bagong customer na naupo sa dulong bar stool kaya agad ko itong nilapitan.

"What can I --" Naputol ko ang sinasabi ko nang makitang si Jethro pala ito. Bumalik agad ang inis ko sa kanya dahil sa sinabi niya kagabi. Bwisit na Gori.

"Can we talk?" he asked with his usual cold baritone voice. 

"We're talking." I took a deep breath, trying to control my anger.

"I'm sorry for what I said last night," he said while looking at my eyes with an expression I couldn't fathom; must be from the way the neon lights grazed his black jacket, or the way the darkness seemed to have surrounded us.

"I was out of line and--"

"Damn right you were out of line," I cut him off out of anger. "I was there last night, trying to have fun, and there you were, accusing me of using someone for such a petty reason. You know what? Learn to mind your own business. After all, you are Reika's friend and not mine." And with that, I walked out from the bar and headed straight to the locker room. 

I heaved a deep sigh the moment I was alone to myself.

Minasahe ko ang sentido ko habang paulit-ulit na humihinga nang malalim. Sobrang sakit ng ulo ko at sobrang bigat pa ng kalooban ko. Mukhang mali yatang pinilit kong magtrabaho sa gabing 'to. 

"Sil?" All of a sudden there was a knock on the door. I recognized Maru's voice right away kaya naman paulit-ulit akong huminga nang malalim bago binuksan ang pinto.

"Everything alright?" he asked with concern. "Saw you walk out from the CCTV."

"Yeah." I nodded. "Just a little hangover. Reika and I had too much to--"

"Go home," he said with a firm tone. 

"No, it's okay." I shook my head, trying to look like my head doesn't feel like bursting.

"No, Go home," he insisted. "I'll cover for the rest of your shift."

"Lorenzo is upstairs, baka mamaya--"

"When I first started, unang bilin sa akin ni Boss na kapag masama ang pakiramdam ay umatras na agad. Most of our customers are drunk and unruly, we can't handle them if we're not our 100%," aniya dahilan para makunot ang noo ko.

"Lorenzo Cohen really said that?" I mused.  "The king of the fuckboys, Lorenzo Cohen?" I asked.

"Shocking right?" He chuckled as he nodded.

Cohen may be a piece of shit but at least he's a pretty good employer. 

Heeding Maru's advice, kinuha ko ang mga gamit ko at naghanda na lamang na umalis. Paglabas ko ng club, natanaw ko ang sasakyan ni Jethro na naka-park. Lilihis sana ako ng dinadaan kaso nakita ko na siyang lumabas. 

"Ihahatid na kita," he offered.

Umiling ako at naglakad palayo pero narinig ko ang mga yapak niyang sumusunod sa akin. "Reika would prefer for you to catch a ride with me."

Huminto na lamang ako sa paglalakad at bumuntong-hininga. Pambawi na nga lang sa pamb-bwisit niya sa akin kagabi.

By the time we got inside his car, and after putting on the seatbelt, napapikit agad ako sabay masahe ng sentido ko.

"You okay?" I heard him ask.

"My head hurts like hell and I want to go home," I answered in almost a whisper.

"Okay," he said and I heard the engine start.

The ride entire ride was silent. Muli, hindi ulit kami nagkibuan hanggang sa namalayan kong huminto ang sasakyan. Dumilat ako at nang makitang nasa tapat na kami ng bahay, lumabas na agad ako nang walang ibang sinasabi.

Reika was surprised to see me home earlier than expected kaya pagkatapos magpaliwanag, I headed off to bed right away.

Next thing I know, I found myself waking up in my bed. It was only 11 in the evening, but I couldn't bring myself to go back to sleep anymore. 

I took a peek under Reika's part of the bed, and I saw her deep in slumber. 

I sighed and laid back on my bed, staring at the blank ceiling. All of a sudden, I remembered the exchange between Jethro and me back at the bar. 

I can't help but wince, remembering the words that escaped my mouth.

I think that was too much considering he was just trying to apologize.

I let my anger get the best of me.

I was out of line too.

I heaved another sigh and grabbed my phone. I felt guilty so I quickly sent him a message.

Jethro

11:56 PM

Silver:

sorry about what I said earlier

good night

Ibinaba ko ang cellphone ko at muling napatitig sa kisame. Ilang sandali pa ay bigla itong lumiwanag at nakita ko ang pangalan niya sa screen.

Jethro:

can we be friends? 

Silver:

ok

Napangiwi ako. "Para tayong mga tanga."

| End of 27 - Thank you! |