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Chapter 5/6

Many months passed. Jordan continued writing lyrics and living with Chloe, and he never saw Alex again. But he was far from feeling content. Christi's Alzheimer's disease substantially worsened; she couldn't even eat on her own, and she wasn't able to speak more than a few words. The assisted living facility where Christi used to live advised Jordan and Chloe that they would no longer be able to care for Christi, so they had no choice but to bring her to a nursing home. It wasn't long before Christi contracted pneumonia and needed oxygen to breathe. Her deteriorating physical health put a significant strain on Jordan and Chloe's already chaotic marriage. Jordan spent most of his time next to Christi's bed. He was less concerned with alienating Chloe and more concerned with giving Christi the best quality of life for as long as possible.

One cloudy Friday night, Jordan visited Christi in her room. She was hooked up to a breathing machine, making her overall appearance quite disheartening. Jordan quietly sat down on the chair. Her eyes were closed as usual, so he couldn't tell if she was sleeping or not, but he spoke to her anyways. "Hey Christi, it's Jordan" he said. She had no response. "I'm sorry I'm so late; I had a... an email I had to look over". Jordan fidgeted. "The doctors said you spoke a whole sentence yesterday; that's pretty good. But you haven't had much to eat lately; that's kinda concerning... I just wish you were better, Christi, cuz I really need your company. I don't have anyone to talk to anymore" ... Christi's ECG beeped; it was hypnotic, almost soothing, with its sound. "You know... I feel more alone as married than I did as single. Before I could speak to Chloe about anything; now she just critiques everything I say. She doesn't get it, not one thing I do. It's so frustrating".

Jordan looked out the window. "You know, sometimes I wonder why I married her. I know I always thought she was gorgeous; I was always a sucker for blondes. And I felt as though I connected with her; she was certainly my favorite dancer. But I guess that was then and this is now; things are different now. It's funny... way back when she was the underdog everyone rooted for; she was the one you loved to watch on TV. But then she left the show, and there really wasn't much significant about her anymore. After awhile, she basically stopped being famous. She was kinda like a has-been" ... Feeling restless, Jordan sat up from the chair and paced around the room. "I dunno... I wish I could just go back in time, back to when she was famous. There was so much more to love about her back then. But I know it was too much for her to handle, at least after a few seasons. Perhaps it was for the best she quit".

It was raining outside. Jordan watched the puddles on the ground. The sound of raindrops soon became background noise. Jordan sat down on the chair again. Feeling exhausted, he allowed his thoughts to wander for what seemed like an eternity. Some time passed before he looked across the room and noticed Christi staring blankly at him. Although she was mute, Jordan could tell she recognized his face. Jordan decided to avoid asking questions and instead focus on making statements. "Hey, Christi, I'm glad you're awake now. I've been here for quite awhile. I'm not sure how long you've been awake for, but I was talking to myself about things. I needed to let a lot out, I guess ... I'm just not sure how much longer I can hold on for. Chloe and I are just about at each other's throats, and I dunno what'll happen with you down the road. Things are so hard now. But no matter what, you'll always be my number one priority". Jordan looked into Christi's eyes. "I never thought you'd end up like this. No one believed it, not at first. We didn't want to. But then you... you couldn't even remember my name... I never regretted having you go to an assisted living facility. Chloe did, but not me. And I know you never objected to it. We just wanted the best for you; that's all".

Jordan looked down at the floor. Christi maintained her silence, but she continued staring at Jordan. "You know what, Christi? I haven't been too honest about your life. There are things I... I never really told you about. I'm sorry. Chloe said I would always cherry-pick what I wanted to speak about, and I guess she was right about that. But I'll tell the truth for now on. I dunno what the future holds, so I wanna come clean. You deserve to know about yourself". Jordan took a deep breath before continuing. "Your mother's name wasn't Elizabeth. She was actually your grandmother, and she passed away over twenty years ago. Your biological mother's name is Deborah. As far as I'm aware, she's still alive, but I could be mistaken. But anyways, your father's name was James. I don't ever recall you bringing him up, so I dunno if he's still alive. Deborah had you when she was seventeen, and I can't imagine James was that much older. In any case, I don't think your parents planned on having you".

At this point, Jordan hesitated. Christi looked uncomfortable, but he wasn't sure why. Still, he wanted to share as much with her as he could. Despite Christi's visible distress, Jordan felt obligated to go on. "Obviously, your childhood wasn't very fun. Deborah didn't allow you to be a cheerleader, so you always had to sneak out the window to go. James didn't seem involved in the picture, and I wouldn't be surprised if he left at some point. I can't imagine your little sister, Jodi, enjoyed her life, either. But then you moved to your grandparents' house. I think the address was 56 Poplar Road in Groton Connecticut... yeah, I remember. Elizabeth and Andrew raised you. They loved you as if you were their own daughter, no matter what". Jordan paused to look at Christi; there was a look of anguish on her face. She kept staring at him, but there was something different about her demeanor. Jordan felt guilty, and so he faced away. As he looked out the window, Christi uttered a single word: "Why" ...

Jordan choked up for a moment. He felt like Christi was suffering in her current state of mind, and he was somewhat to blame. It became apparent he had to do something. He stood up and reluctantly walked over to Christi; his voice faltered a bit as he spoke. "You know what's weird? You know what really keeps me up at night? I always thought you would never see Elizabeth and Andrew again, but now I know, you will". Jordan reached into his pocket and took out a bottle of slightly red water. It got its color from several Secobarbital pills; they were meant to help Christi's insomnia. Jordan hoarded them. No one ever noticed, not even Christi's aid. Jordan gave the bottle to Christi. He made her drink, despite her initial reluctance. Jordan then proceeded to put a piece of paper underneath Christi's hand. It was a letter from Christi's viewpoint, and it alluded to her desire to see her grandparents. Jordan fooled Christi into writing the letter years ago. Since it was her handwriting, no one would question it. He noticed Christi fall asleep and put some more Secobarbital pills under her pillow. By doing so, everything would appear natural. There were tears in Jordan's eyes. Without a doubt, today was the worst day of his entire life. Christi's ECG started to beep less and less often. Eventually, it became silent. Christi was finally at peace. Most importantly, she was with Elizabeth and Andrew again. 

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