Warning: Panic attack

"You're staying with us until your rib heals," Payton's dad Aurthur says to me as he rolls the wheelchair into the house. He sets me up in the living room and waits as Payton walks into the room with a suitcase trailing behind her, a fresh bruise on her cheek.

I look away as she sets the suitcase down beside me, still feeling guilty. She taps me on the shoulder and I quickly look up at her, being able to see how bad the bruise is going to be from how close we are. "C'mon, let's get you on the couch," she says, helping me waddle over to the couch and sit down. Stella walks in with a bag of groceries, looking over at me sitting on the couch and frowning.

She sets the groceries down on the kitchen counter and walks over to where me and Payton are sitting, standing in front of us. She crouches down in front of me and I flinch back instinctively, making her sigh softly. She slowly reaches out and grabs one of my hands, holding it in here and looking me in the eyes.

"Please don't ever go back there," she says, her soft green eyes boring into my hazel ones. I slowly take my hand out of hers and move back, wincing slightly at the thought of going back. "You know I have to," I whisper quietly. She shakes her head and stands up, patting me on the shoulder before grabbing my suitcase and walking up the stairs.

I turn to the tv, seeing it playing some random show that I would never choose on my own. "You know, she thinks of you as her own son," Payton says. I look over at her and see that her eyes are still on the tv. "She loves you more than that, that person who doesn't even deserve the right to call himself your father," she says, clenching and unclenching her fists in her lap as she stares at the tv.

She sighs and rubs her hands on her billowy orange skirt, looking away from me. "If you want to stay here and not go back, we'll figure something out," she says, finally turning to look at me. I look at the bright purple bruise on her face and feel tears prick my eyes as I grasp the bottom of my shirt.

"I'm going back," I say after a minute, looking down at my legs. She gently touches my back and I make sure I don't look up, not wanting to burst into tears. I have to go back or he's going to hurt someone else. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you," I whisper, barely able to hear myself. I hear Payton's sharp intake of breath and I move closer to the side of the couch, slowly looking up.

Her eyes glisten with tears as she looks at me, her whole demeanor fallen. She tackles me into a hug and I hold her, even when my rib starts to hurt. She sniffles into my hair and I slowly smooth it down, softly telling her how sorry I am. She looks up at me and wipes her eyes with one hand, a few strands of her messy bun falling out and cradling her face. 

"He hurts you Linc! He hits you and yells at you!" She yells. I move closer to the couch as she abruptly stands up, looking down at me with a furious look on her face. I whimper and try to move back into the couch more, making her face fall and soften. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean-" she starts but I cut her off by standing up.

I feel a bit of pain from my broken rib as I stand up, but ignore it as I walk away from her and over to the back door. I unlock in and it swings open, letting the warm air inside. I walk out and close the door behind me, carefully making my way across the grass to the middle of the yard.

I sit down and look around, focusing on the way the wind moves all the leaves on the small maple tree in the corner of the yard instead of how mad Payton was. The wind ruffles my hair and I let myself be immersed in all the sounds and feelings, not wanting to think about anything at all.

I don't know how long I sit out there for but after a while I feel a small tap on my shoulder, making me turn to face the person. Stella stands there looking a bit sheepish as she holds her hand out to me. "It's dinner time if you want some," she says. I nod and grab her hand, her helping me stand and walk back to the house.

We walk inside and I see Payton sitting at the kitchen table, as well as Desmond and Oakley, who must have come over at some point when I was sitting outside. I stop in my tracks and look into the kitchen from where I'm standing in the doorway. I probably made Payton mad by running out of the room and I've already caused her so much trouble by having her pick up my stuff from my dad's house and her getting hit.

"You coming?" Stella asks me, making me shake my head. She walks into the kitchen without me, leaving me in the doorway to watch them. I feel my lungs start to tighten and I scramble to get out of the doorway, only to realize that the only way to get to another room is to go through the kitchen from the hallway.

I frantically look around, trying, and failing, to find anywhere to go. I start to feel like the walks are coming closer to me and I run out of the hallway, drawing the attention of everyone sitting in the kitchen. "Linc you just broke a rib you shouldn't be running. Wait, are-" Oakley says as I run out of the room and book it down the hall.

I scamper into the guest bedroom and somehow manage to close the door with my shaking hands. I slide down the back of the door and onto the floor, feeling tears stream down my face. I grip onto my hair and try to breath, only to realize that I can't because of how much I'm hyperventilating.

There's a knock on the door and I whimper as I hear someone move around outside. "Linc? Are you alright?" Desmond's muffled voice comes from outside the door. I grab my arms and curl closer to myself, hating the pity. "Can I come in?" He asks softly from outside after a minute, startling me and making me jump.

I shake even harder as I slowly move away from the door and into the one corner of the room that doesn't have a piece of furniture in it. "I'm really worried so I'm coming in!" Desmond says, making me curl closer to myself, hiding my face in my knees. I hear the door open and a gasp as he walks in.

I shake even harder, trying to move back closer to the wall. "I'm sorry! I don't, I don't know what's wrong. I just-" I mutter frantically, still not looking up at him. I hear the door close and soft footsteps walk over to me. "Hey you're okay," he says softly. I hear him sit down in front of me and I slowly look up at him, wiping my eyes off with my sleeves.

"Can I touch you?" He asks softly. I nod and he holds his arms out, moving over so I can hug him. I wrap my arms around his waist and listen to him breath, trying to match my breathing with his. He softly rubs my back and I lean into him, trying to calm down.
I hear the door open and I start shaking harder. Payton and Oakley walk over to where I'm sitting with Desmond and I try not to look any of them in the eye. "I'm not mad at you. I promise," Payton says softly. I look up at her and see her usual worried expression on her face.

I stop shaking as much and Desmond seems to realize as he unwraps his arms from around me and moves over to where his boyfriend is sitting. He sits down next to Oakley and wraps an arm around him, smiling softly at me. "I'm sorry," I whisper, making Payton shake her head and hold out her arms. I scoot over to where she's sitting and lean against her, letting her wrap her arms around me.

"Do you have panic attacks often?" Oakley asks from where he's sitting. I look at him from over Payton's shoulder, seeing him looking at me worriedly. I pull out of the hug and shrug, making him sigh and look at me pointedly. "Maybe once a week," I mumble, seeing him nod.

Stella walks into the room with two trays full of food. She sets the down on the floor in front of us and smiles before walking over to me, quickly looking me over to make sure I'm okay. When she she's satisfied, she walks back to the doorway before quickly turning to us. "You can eat dinner in here, also there's a new movie that just came out and We rented it if you all want to watch it later," she says before walking out of the room and closing the door.

"Alright. Well I don't know about you guys but I'm starving," Payton says, making me laugh softly. She smiles at me before moving closer to the trays in the room and taking a piece of watermelon out of one of the bowls. I scoot closer and take a sandwich, biting into it and sighing.

Stella is honestly one of the best cooks I know, the other one being Max. Stella works for Max at his restaurant and she's been trying to open her own for as long as I've known Payton. I take another bite of the food, watching as Desmond and Payton talk animatedly about some show that I've never watched.

Oakley seems uninterested so I lean over and tap him on the shoulder, making him look over at me. I motion for him to move closer so he scoots next to me. "I dare you to spray whipped cream on Des' face," I whisper to him. He nods and takes a strawberry and the bottle of whipped cream off the tray.

He opens the cap and puts some whipped cream on the strawberry before abruptly turning it and spraying it all over Desmond. He looks up at his whipped cream wielding boyfriend in shock and I cover my mouth with my hand, trying not to laugh. "How dare you?" He gasps, putting a hand over his heart and falling into the floor dramatically.

"Eh, you'll taste good later," Oakley says, shrugging before popping the strawberry in his mouth. Desmond's while face goes red and Payton moves over, covering my ears with her hands. "Guys, there are innocents present," she says, loud enough for me to hear. I snort and take her hands off my ears, shaking my head.

We finish eating and I go to grab a tray off the ground, only to have Payton smack my hand. "You are injured, let me do it," she says, picking up one of the trays while Oakley grabs the other. We walk out of the room and into the kitchen, where they set the trays beside the sink.

Payton turns to Desmond, who is still somewhat covered in whipped cream and sighs. "If you want, you can shower in the upstairs bathroom. Linc's got his soap in there," she says. "No!" Oakley yells making me look over at him in surprise. He seems to panic for a moment before he smirks and turns to Desmond.

"He won't taste like whipped cream then," he says, feigning sadness. Payton sighs and shakes her head at the couple, walking out of the room. I follow Desmond and Oakley to the living room, wondering why in the world Oakley looked so panicked when Payton said Desmond could take a shower.

I shrug it off and sit down on the couch, watching as Desmond walks over and puts the movie into the player. He sits back down on the floor next to his boyfriend, pulling a bunch of pillows off of the couch for them to sit on. I manage to grab one before he can take them all, putting it under my back.

All the running and panicking I did today did not help my rib heal at all. The movie starts playing and I watch as a blue hedgehog runs across the screen. I lean back against the pillow sitting on the arm of the couch and watch with interest as the intro ends and the beginning of the movie plays.

Stella walks out mid-movie with a bucket of popcorn and a packet of gummy bears for each of us. She puts the popcorn on the floor near the boys and Payton, knowing that I don't like popcorn. She hands me a bag of gummy bear and some m&ms, winking as she hands me the second one.

"Thank you Stella," I says softly as she walks out of the room, seeing her smile before walking up the stairs. I eat the whole packet of m&ms by the time the movie ends, not even having opened the bag of gummy bears yet. "Is 'The Princess and the Frog' okay?" Payton asks us, getting a murmur of agreement.

She puts the movie in and I fight to keep my eyes open as the movie comes on, eventually succumbing to sleep.