ESRIN
SAGE

I haven't decided if things make sense or they don't as yet.

So unlikely that Death Hood, a horrifying serial killer sets free someone caught sniffing where their nose shouldn't be. Even more, set free without any major harm done to their physical body. Why choose to blackmail me into keeping quiet instead of just killing me?

Why is he doing this? Also, to get his hands on this and in the span of a few hours...I've definitely underestimated him. Everyone has and they don't even know it. For heaven's sake, Death Hood got his hands on my email!

Anyway, to answer the very obvious question, no things do not make sense at all.
What did I get myself into?

It's hard to pretend as if this never happened. Last night was already enough as it is now this...

Is there more? I'll stay quiet so that means there can't be more. I don't think I can handle more than this.

The rest of the workday progresses so slowly. It's difficult to concentrate on work or anything at all. Louis is bubbly as ever, having a new topic to chat off Seth and  I's ears about but I think he sensed something was up today.

Thankfully, Zayn physically avoids me for another day. He keeps most interactions over professional emails or phone calls. Is his office a few steps away from mine? Yes. Does it take less time to walk over and tell me instead of typing an entire email? Yes. However, I still appreciate that I don't have to see his face.

Unfortunately, I didn't finish all the tasks I'd set out for myself today. Thankfully, I finished the ones that were a priority and needed to be done today. Hopefully, tomorrow is better and I can tackle the rest of it.

Settling into my Jeep when I was ready to go home, I stared at the radio and turned the dial up, letting music flood into the car. I pulled out of the parking lot and made my way to the road and within five minutes, I turned the music off again. Every moment I get, I keep replaying the main horrifying events from the last twenty-four hours.

Is it possible for an elevator to hate me? Because I swear it, today the elevator that takes me up to the penthouse takes a few seconds too long. Eventually, it takes me to my floor and when I opened the penthouse door, the sound of laughter hits my ears.

Already, I'm confused because Remi said she's working late tonight. Usually, that means somewhere between ten at the night to three in the morning. It's currently a few minutes after eight.

I was planning to have the entire place to myself, submerge my body in a nice scented body and realise how messed up my life has become. Truthfully, I was in desperate need to hide away from the world. I needed to organize and clear my thoughts.

The second reason for my confusion, that didn't sound like one person that was laughing. I walked into the penthouse, peering over to the living room area straight ahead and my eyes catches with Remi first. She's definitely not alone.

She jumps from the sofa and darts my way, I see that there are a few other people with her but I don't look at them because I know they're looking at me. There's just a voice in my head repeating don't look at them, don't look at them, don't look at them.

"You haven't responded to any of my text messages all day," Remi states, frowning at me with a worried look. Still captive in her eyes you could see the happiness that held them before I arrived. Still dressed in her dark police uniform but her long sleeves that were usually buttoned at her wrists were pushed to her elbows, showing her inked designs.

Remi was covered in tattoos. I look- and I am- a very blank canvass compared to her. Her right arm was complete, her left one still had space for more. She even had designs on both sides of her neck. She loves them but hates getting them done but they give her the perfect vibe for her job because at the first glance, people are afraid of her.

"Yeah, sorry. I guess I should've," I apologised. My phone was buried in my bag and it was the least of my worries today. When I couldn't feel their stares burning into my skin, I finally drifted my eyes to the unfamiliar bodies sitting around our living room area.

There were three of them.

I didn't keep my eyes on them long enough to make it obvious. "I thought you were working late tonight?" I mentioned, walking to the table to rest down everything I was holding. "They didn't need me to shift in anymore and the guys decided to check out my place and chill," she fills me in, nodding her head in the direction of her friends.

"Ready to meet them?" She continues but I can't get myself out of it this time so I have to agree. "Sure but I'm tired so I can't stay downstairs long," I truthfully tell her. I'm a very sociable person. Only when my social battery is high. Right now, it's drained.

"That's alright, they might leave soon anyway," she informs me and a thank God moment happens. It's not that I don't want to meet Remi's friends because I do, they make her happy. Today is just a bad day, the worst day to do this.

With a sigh, I allowed her to take me away. "Everyone," Remi sings excitedly, effectively grabbing her friend's attention. "This is Esrin," she introduces and I forced my eyes off the ground to look at them.

Our sofa set had three pieces. The single seater, three-person seater and double seater. Remi previously sat on the single-seater, two of her friends on either end of the three-person seater and one of them sat on the double seater.

A guy that sits on the widest couch darts up, pure excitement radiating his body. "Roman, Finley Roman," he introduces himself, casually holding his hand out and automatically my hand lifts to shake his hand. His name rings a bell, few times Remi has ranted to me about a crazy story with Finley being the star.

"I'm pretty sure I know everything about you and I haven't even met you. Our mutual friend blabbers a lot, doesn't she," Finley continues, sending a glare to Remi which she rolls her eyes at.

Still in my heels, Finley and I were the same height. He still wore a boyish smile, chocolate eyes that reminds me of Remi's and charcoal black hair that has longer strands to the top that hides part of his forehead. I wondered how old he was, by his appearance I could guess he was younger than Remi and me but I wasn't too sure.

"My pronouns are he/him and I'm gay as fuck. I'll consider being bisexual for a night if you're ever interested," Finley babbles, sending me a friendly wink at his proposition. "I'll consider considering that," I joke and he's pleased with my reply. "Just make sure enough tequila is involved," he carried on and happily flopped back down on the sofa.

My eyes glide off Finley and land on the guy that shared the triple-seater with him. His right arm was on the armrest holding a beer bottle, the left one thrown across the back of the sofa. The guy wore a wine red shirt with short sleeves, allowing me to see how inked his entire left arm was as well as how much blank space the right one had.

My curious eyes found his face. That face. I drink all of him in, the structure of his defined jaw, intense pale green eyes with some darker flecks matched my stare, framed by thick curled eyelashes. His hair was lustrous brown, messy curls that looked so effortlessly perfect. His curls were pushed away from the frame of his face beside the single curl fallen down his forehead.

"Esrin, this is Harry." When that name slipped off Remi's mouth it was like something had finally clicked together inside me and again my head snapped towards the man she just named.

Harry.

Harry. My old Harry was already staring at me, trying to hold back a smirk as he watches the wheels turn behind my eyes. My eyes widened, looking at him from a new perspective. Suddenly, everything just made sense and I started to notice all the similarities while obviously staring at him but I couldn't help myself.

His entire arm being inked made so much sense now- it was Harry's dream from the first day I met him. His eyes dropped slowly scanning me from head to toe with a look that didn't settle pleasantly with me but I brushed it off.

It's like I couldn't breathe, so many memories from my childhood through the middle of adolescence with this same person skipping through my mind. I was simply frozen, compelled by those green eyes that unlocked so many memories I kept away from the surface of my mind.

Harry stands and I follow his every moment as he gets a little closer to us. I had to tilt my head up slightly to look at him and when I'm out of these heels, he's going to be even taller. If I had to admit it, I was prepared to hug him.

"It's nice to meet you, Esrin," Harry holds his hand out for me to shake just like Finley. Only for him, my body isn't as willing to but nevertheless, I still placed my hand in his. His fingers locked around my palm, the firm warmth of them mixing with the coolness from his rings.

I'm confused and stunned. He remembers me, right? Ten years is a long time, I know a lot has changed but I'd think he'd remember me. At least slightly? We grew up together. I was part of a life that he had to leave behind.

"You okay?" Remi confusedly asks me after Harry released my hand and took his seat again. I looked away, blinking to snap myself out of it. "Uh yeah thanks," I replied and convinced her. Something Finley says grabs her attention and I walked to the double-seater where Remi's other friend sat.

Long black waves, ending at his shoulders with a few visible brown streaks through them. The hairs at the top and side of his face were pulled back and tied at the back allowing me to see him properly.

"And I'm Edgar but you can call me Eddie," Gentle but happy blue eyes stared into my honey brown ones. "Please call me Eddie," he insists, more like pleads with a sense of seriousness. "Okay, hi Eddie," I smile, already liking him.

Besides his gorgeous eyes and luscious long hair, the second thing I noticed about him that caught my attention was the thin scar that could be seen through his left eyebrow. It's deeper at the top and at the end where it stops just below his eyelashes but is faint near his eyelids. I don't stare at it longer than one look because I'm sure he wouldn't like that.

"Pretty scar," I tell him as we sit down together on the double couch, a space still between us. The compliment surprises him, I could see it in his eyes. "Thank you," Eddie replies softly, looking away and smiling to himself.

"How was work today?" Remi breaks the conversation, her question aimed at me. "The usual," I answered, obviously not wanting to go into details because my performance at work today wasn't the best. "Tell me about it," Finley muttered, taking the beer bottle that was sitting at the foot of the sofa and bringing the tip of it to his lips.

"Anyone hungry? I can whip up a quick something," Remi suggests, her hands resting on her knees while looking at me and her friends for an answer. "No thank you, love. I still refuse to eat anything you cook," Eddie denies right away and I am intrigued.

"It was one time! The first time I cooked for you!" Remi defends herself and they don't even appear to be joking. "Now I have Esrin's mom's recipe book, there's no meal I can't conquer," she brags with a proud smile. I facepalmed, shaking my head in my hands.

My mother. She hates cooking but she's so good at it. When I moved so far away from home as a Christmas present she gave me a personalized recipe book made by her. Remi uses it most of the time and even though she follows everything to perfection, it still never tastes the same as mom's. A mother's special touch can never be replaced. Remi still gets really close though.

I slide my hands away from my face just in time for them to land on Harry and notice the sudden interest he has in the conversation. At the mention of my mom, Harry sits up, crossing his leg over the other, placing both hands on his knee now. That's a good sign, right?

"Oh yeah, I'm sure your mom is a real killer," Harry jabs, that smug look still worn on his face. "At cooking," he adds after taking a pause, adding much more emphasis on his last two words. He knows. How does he know?

That was just a coincidence. It was to be. Right? Please say it was just a coincidence.
If it was then why did my body stiffen the way it did? Mind shattering completely blank from shock?

Something chokes me up and suddenly, it feels as if the world darkened slightly and I get that familiar feeling of someone standing over me. It's the exact feeling that chilled me when Death Hood stood behind me in that store. Death Hood.

"Oh yeah, the best really," Remi agrees, not figuring him out thank goodness. "I'll have to make something soon and have a little dinner here. Instead of eating out all the time," she decides on the spot. "Fuck yeah! Free food!"
I watch from the corner of my eyes as Finley cheers, clapping his hands together in excitement.

My eyes remained on Harry because he also kept his eyes on me and I didn't like it. His stare wasn't normal...those familiar green oceans held so much intent that it scared me.

"Couldn't stay away." As Harry said those words with his eyes remaining on me as if knowing what the effects of them would cause. Those were the first three words Death Hood spoke to me last night while hovering the blade of a knife on my neck.

That voice.

I could feel the life flashing off my face, suddenly feeling how a deer would when caught in unexpected headlights. Harry's voice matches the perfect way with Death Hood's. It's clear to me now that today, he held no fright that I'd recognize his voice. Last night, he held no caution to hide his voice.

With remembering the sound of his voice, now I can perfectly see this Harry wearing that mask and clothes. Even something that I didn't realise I picked up on. The roughness of Death Hood's fingers under the gloves he wore. They weren't a smooth fit. My eyes dropped to Harry's fingers. They were decorated with thick rings on almost all of them.

Suddenly, I could see the green in Death Hood's eyes. I knew it was never brown or black, had to be something else. Even when Harry stood to shake my hand, his height shared no difference from Death Hood's when he stood in front of me last night.

Undeniable. It is undeniable.

"Excuse me, I need..." I don't finish my sentence, I stood up and walked off, needing to put as much space between us as possible. If I could've made it up the stairs so I could get to my bedroom, I would. My legs wobbled slightly as I walked off, I didn't trust them to run up those stairs.

Found myself walking down the hallway where the little gym room was because there were wide glass windows that view the open city. Seeing Harry today after ten years really felt like a slap across the cheek. Connecting his voice to Death Hood was like a slap across the other cheek. Way to even it out.

"I'm sure your mom is a real killer."

Hearing him say that, the sneaky mention of my mother's worst mistake and one of my family's hidden blemishes- that couldn't be a coincidence. It gave me the feeling of a wave knocking me over and I could no longer feel the sand between my toes and I'm thrashing around in the water.

Next, came that...realization of Harry being Death Hood. Just the possibility of that was me finding the surface and breaking free, getting air into my lungs for a split second, only for another wave to push me down again. One after the next.

"Sage." Harry. My body froze at the sound of his voice, low and calm yet a little commanding. My eyes were on the glass gym door, I could see our equipment through it.

He already followed me here and he'll probably follow me in that room too. Here is better, I can escape faster. So with that, I turned on my heel and there he was standing maybe two steps away.

"Did you get my little message?" Harry asks, a smile with wicked intentions stretches across his face. "I know you did. Loud and clear, yeah?" He continues, taking an intimidating step closer but it's more towards my side. He really is Death Hood.

That makes me take three steps back to the side so he wasn't standing next to me, still in front of me. My eyes flickered between both of his, searching for the joke of this all or at least some sense of familiarity.

"Who are you?" That question falls off my mouth without permission but it's one that I kept asking myself about him. The corner of Harry's mouth twitches up, obvious amusement mirroring in his face at my question. "You know who I am, Esrin," Harry smoothly answers. My jaw clenches tightly, proof of how much he boiled my anger.

When the pieces magnetically joined just now, I was knocked over by a train of shock. I've thought about Harry a lot over the past couple of years and sometimes I create scenarios about his life right now.

This, being a serial killer under my best friend's nose, is not one of them. She's going to be so hurt when she finds out... Harry read my mind. I swear it. He had to know what I was thinking of.

"One would uttered about any of this and everyone knows. How would Remi react to knowing her best friend assaulted someone and is covering it up?" The threat is bold in his words, his power reeking off every word, move- him. "Mr Malik wouldn't be pleased to know his employee doesn't have a clean background after all, wouldn't he?" He adds.

My face pales and he loves the reaction he gets out of me. How did he know I work at Malik Creations? What more does he know? Something tells me he didn't get that from Remi even though it's possible.

"You don't scare me," I bluff. His name was at the tip of my tongue, wanting to add it at the end but for some reason, I can't say it. His name runs across my mind a million times but voicing it- I can't.

Harry's eyes narrow slightly and he takes a step forward and I take another one back and I soon realise that's exactly what he wanted. Now my back is almost against the wall and Harry snatches the opportunity, pushing my shoulder into the wall suddenly, his hand was around my neck with his knee separating both of my legs.

How can this be my Harry?  My Harry would try to count the stars with me, taught me to ride a bicycle without training wheels, and wrote a bedtime story for me- this can't be the same person.

"You suck at lying too," he noted. The sound of Remi laughing loudly from the living room reaches our ears. It's like a reminder that anyone can catch him at any moment and he turns his head, looking down the hallway to make sure we were still alone.

When his eyes met my nervous ones again, it was like they were so encrypted that I can't read anything from him. "Let me make it clear for you, yeah?" It's like he's offering something I don't want but I can't refuse it either. "Keep it to yourself," I snapped, paired with my hands attempting to push at his chest and scrape his hand away from my neck.

Harry gets enough of my hands in his way and he lets out an annoyed sound. Next- I find myself in another trap- Harry's free hands snapped both of my hands by the wrists and slammed my hands above my head, keeping them locked with his grip on my wrists. Lovely.

"One word about what you know and I'll make sure no one ever considers your employment ever again. Dozens of that emails will be shared with Remi, mommy and dad-"

"Okay! I get it," I snapped, cutting him off because the impact he was promising felt brutal to think about. I didn't want to hear any more of it. How easy he could destroy my life even more than he's already ruined it.

"It's a fair game. We both keep our mouths shut. You do want to play fair, don't you?" He questions, faking to be actually curious about my answer. "That's it, I have had enough of this. You're forgetting that I can expose you to Remi. She may not believe me at first but if I make her do a little bit of digging, you're done," I shared, hoping to seem as threatening and convincing as him.

Harry's not as nearly as phased by my words. In fact, if I had to guess I'd say that he appeared as if he just heard something funny. "You think I'm the only one, Sweetheart? I've thought through all possible outcomes and they all end with your secret out. Even if I'm wearing an orange jumpsuit or not," he hinted.

Right then, Harry's grip on my neck adjusts in a way that it hurts so unexpectedly good. I didn't know if he meant to or not but it happened. The pleasure of it came across as so uncontrollable that I let out a sound, that voices the sudden rush that was shot throughout my body. 

Harry's hand around my throat weakens slightly, part of the shock that flashes across his face. The dangerous look he wore that scared me so much actually went away for a moment. Clearly, neither of us was expecting that to happen. Yes, I hated that it happen but no way I was going to apologize for it.

That wasn't supposed to happen. From the moment it happened, I hated myself for it.

"Oh this is going to be fun," Harry mutters more to himself, showing that smirk of his again. I gritted my teeth in annoyance and frustration.
Damn him and his smug stupid face.

I spit at him.

Yes. I spat in his face, feeling pleased with myself when his face twists with shock and his hand around my neck loosens just a little bit. Harry releases my wrists and they drop at my sides again, his now free hand wiping it away from his cheek and then wipes his hand on the front of my blazer.

"Are you trying to turn me on too?" He smirks, probably feeling so proud of himself for saying that. "I hate you," I gritted out, using my hands to push at his face and at one point my finger even pressed into his eyes. Harry let out a sound that tells me he's had enough of this.

"Message isn't clear enough?" Harry assumes. I didn't know if it was because he didn't like that we weren't at eye level or because he simply wanted to scare me even more than he already has. Very possible it's the second option. Harry tightens his hold around my throat. It forces me to up the wall, my feet no longer planted flat on the ground and now I could feel the tip of my toes hovering over the ground.

It frightened me. There wasn't one ounce of hesitation or regret I could find in him. Those deceitful eyes tell me that he wouldn't mind taking this further, doing something much worse. My hands abandoned trying to push him away and instead started to get his hand away from my neck.

"S-Stop," I stuttered, feeling flames burst and burn behind my skin, my throat and entire body screaming for help. It took absolutely most of my strength to mutter that simple word. Harry doesn't stop though, nothing I do fazes him.

At first, my hands were scraping and digging at his arms and wrist to let me go, even pushing his face away, bringing my knee up to hit him anywhere I could but nothing worked. In fact, it probably gave Harry motivation to keep going.

I don't care about anything else right now other than getting myself far and away from this position.

The struggle and fight I try to put up against Harry probably get him off but eventually- it becomes too much.

I couldn't feel myself choking and gasping for air but I know I was. I didn't stop trying to get away though, even when everything suddenly started to turn dark, and I could barely feel my hands.

"There's worse in your cards, don't force me to draw another one," I hear his words but I can't listen to them. He knew. Harry knew I had enough and was about to pass out when he finally releases his hold. Having zero stability to land on my feet, I drop to the ground, hitting my head on the wall in the process.

My throat burns from what previously happened but also from the rush of air and my body trying to compose itself after that. When my coughing and gasping became too loud for Harry, he bends down and slams his hand across my mouth.

"Shut the fuck up," he ordered, pressing down his hand for an extra measure before pulling away and standing straight. He wants me quiet in every way. Quiet but alive.

He makes his move to leave, already walking away from my vision finally. So why did I stop him? "What happened to you?" I softly asked Harry. Not because of decency but because I physically couldn't talk normally right now.

He heard me. Harry stops walking, he stands frozen for a few seconds and then he turns around, green eyes falling on me. "You don't want to know, Sweetheart," He told me, turned around and kept walking, leaving me here alone.

Relieved, I stretched out my legs, leaning my aching head carefully against the wall while the last five minutes replayed in my head over and over until I could've wrapped my head around it. Now is the perfect moment where I ask myself what just happened.

I take a few minutes to calm myself so that breathing no longer was a struggle and my fingertips no longer felt like stars crawling inside them. I composed myself then a few minutes after that, I prepared myself to resurface into the living room.

First I walked to the kitchen to grab myself a tall glass of water because after that encounter and all of that coughing, I needed water.

Leaning against the countertop, I look over to the living room area and noticed that Harry was gone. Relief has never felt so good. It makes me laugh because all those years I spent growing up with Harry, I never imagined that there'd be a day when I'm relieved that he's gone.

Before returning to them, I pulled up my blazer as much as possible to conceal my neck. I needed to escape to my room before anyone can notice the handprint I'm sure is on my neck.

"I'm sorry about that," I told everyone as I sat down in the space where Harry was previously. "Where's the other one?" I asked, innocently looking around. "Harry? Oh, he got a package he needs to sign for so he left," Remi fills me in.

Her face lit up at the mention as if she just remembered something. "Harry's the friend that owns Spooky Silhouettes by the way," she tells me. I had to refrain from rolling my eyes. Thanks for that Remi. "Oh, that's nice," I plastered a fake smile across my face.

"Alright, well I think all that stress at work is finally starting to hit me. I'm going to head upstairs and get comfortable," I babbled out the first excuse that seemed the clearest in my clouded head. Remi's eyes softened, I know she'd be sad I was ditching but...I couldn't.

My eyes landed on Finley and Eddie. "I'm sorry for the bad timing but hopefully we can continue this another time," I apologized. Today was truly an awful day. "Of course, sweet pea. We know how it is," Eddie assured me.

"When are we going to see you again?" Finley asks, catching my eyes on him. "Uh..." I drag out, blank on how to reply to that.

"You know because we haven't decided if we like you yet. So I'd say you join us some time again so we can get a verdict," Eddie informs me. He says it in such a way that I think he's joking about but I can't be certain because he's also serious.

I flicked my eyes to Remi, she was grinning, clearly entertained by her friends. I like seeing her this way, carefree and happy. So when I returned my eyes to Eddie and Finley, I wear a promising smile. "Soon," I tell them and I meant it.

"Feel better," Eddie says and I offer him a smile- a real one surprisingly- before turning around and finally making my way up the stairs.

Even though I had to drag myself to my bedroom, I made it there in one piece and already eagerly found the zipper of my skirt. When it dropped to my feet, I stepped out of it and followed the rest of my clothes until all of it was a heap on the ground.

My body moved on its own. Naked, I went into the shower and the temperature of the water was between warm and too hot- perfection. Today, I wasn't supposed to wash my hair but I walked right under the falling water and stood there.

Harry.

Death Hood.

In that hallway, rid of no eyes besides our own, I found no difference between the two. This Harry though, not the old one I grew up with.

Why did I think we could've left all of this at Spooky Silhouettes?

———
AUTHOR'S
NOTE

That's the end of chapter five! Thoughts?

Here's a visual representation of me after realizing the amount of character development that's going to be needed: