"Words in double quotes" - Talking

'Words in single quotes' - Thoughts

Chapter 1 - Realization

Sanskar entered his room and closed the door. All the others were outside celebrating Ragini and Laksh's engagement. He was also in the mood for celebration. But it was not because of the engagement. It was because he was one step closer to destroying Laksh and Durgaprasad.

He turned to look at the family photo. He recalled creating a havoc in the market and entering Ragini's house. He remembers how Laksh confessed his love to Swara. He recalls how he made Laksh promise to marry Ragini. He smirked 'Finally, you all will pay! I will make sure you don't get the one you love Lucky, just like I didn't get mine.'

Suddenly, his phone rang. He received the call and told Kunal the details of their plan. He cut the call and looked back at the family photo. He let out an evil smile and spoke aloud "Durgaprasad Maheshwari and Laksh Maheshwari. I have come back to take my revenge on you. I already destroyed your business. Now I will destroy your reputation."

He turned around to leave his room. However, he froze at the door when he found Annapurna standing outside. 'Damn! I hope she didn't hear me. If she comes to know the truth, all my efforts will be useless.'

Sanskar tried to put on the act of a mad person "I...I want to go to my dost. Dost! Where are you!?"

However, Annapurna grabbed his wrist and pulled him along with her. She took him to her room and locked the door. She turned to Sanskar, with her eyes filled with rage.

"What is this Sanskar!? We all trusted you, and here you are planning our destruction! How could you do this to your family!?"

"What are you saying lady? I want to go to my dost! Take me there, right now!"

Annapurna came and slapped him "Quit your acting. How could you lie to your own family!?"

Sanskar gave up the act, as he realized she knows the truth.

He spoke in anger "Family? Family!!! Which family? The one that killed my love? The one that heartlessly murdered her!"

Annapurna's eyes softened on seeing Sanskar's eyes. Behind the anger, there was so much sadness, loneliness and pain hidden in those eyes.

"Sanskar, I'm sure there is some misunderstanding. Talk to me beta. I-"

"There is no misunderstanding! I know that Laksh and Durgaprasad killed Kavita. I despise them for it and I will get peace only when I completely break them."

"No. They would never do that! Trust me Sanskar, Laksh would never-"

"Yes he would and he did! He was the one who went and told Durgaprasad that I was meeting Kavita. He is the one who is responsible for her death!"

"That's not true Sanskar. Laksh didn't complain about Kavita to your Bade Papa."

"Then how did he know about it?"

"Sanskar, listen to me beta. Laksh did tell about you and Kavita to your Bade Papa, but he was trying to convince him to accept Kavita as your wife. He even kneeled down in front of your Bade Papa for you."

Sanskar looked at her shocked. 'Could it be...could it be that all this time I...I had assumed wrong?' He shook his head of those thoughts and focused on his anger.

"Whatever. No matter what, he told Bade Papa, which led him to send goons to kill Kavita. I can never forgive both of them for that!"

Annapurna had tears in her eyes "Sanskar beta. Oh my goodness Sanskar. You....you don't know how much of a misunderstanding you're living in. Your Bade Papa never did such a thing. In fact, he was the one who sent the goons to jail"

Sanskar felt like the world was crashing down on him. It was as if the very ground had disappeared from below his feet. He could barely believe what he was hearing.

"No....no! You're lying!"

Annapurna was crying bitterly. "No Sanskar no. I'm not lying. Oh my goodness. You...you have been buried deep under a misunderstanding all this time Sanskar."

Sanskar stumbled back in shock. His mind was spinning with all that he was hearing. 'All that I had been thinking was false? All this time, whatever I did, was just the result of a misunderstanding? My reason to live....it was all something that I created based on a misunderstanding?' Sanskar fell to his knees in shock.

"I'm sorry beta, but its true." Annapurna felt deeply sorry for Sanskar. 'All this time, he had lived with the sorrow and pain of being betrayed by his family, of his love being stolen by the people he called his own. But it was nothing but a misunderstanding. How devastating must it feel to be in his position! He had made his revenge his life's purpose, only to learn that it was all an illusion, a sham.'

"Badi Maa, this means...this means that all this time, I lived for nothing?"

"Don't say that Sanskar. Don't ever say that." she sat down near him and put a hand on his shoulder "You lived for us, for your family who loves you."

"But Badi Maa, don't you hate me now? After knowing that I lied to you, all of you! Ruined Bade Papa's business and tried to ruin your lives. How...how could you forgive someone like me!?"

"Because you are not evil Sanskar. You did all those things because you believed Laksh and your Bade Papa had wronged you. I'm not mad at you Sanskar." she gave him a soft smile "I can never be mad at you. You are like my own son. In fact, I'm sorry for not being able to help you. If I had tried to support you and Kavita more, things may have turned out differently. I'm...I'm sorry beta."

"Maa, please. Please don't say such things. You have nothing to be sorry. Its me that should be sorry. However, I don't think I deserve to be forgiven."

Annapurna gently rubbed his tears and pulled him into a hug "That's not true Sanskar. I forgive you, and I'm sure everyone else will too, once they learn the reason behind your actions. Its okay Sanskar, its okay." Sanskar hugged her back. Annapurna knew that he was trying to hold back his tears, trying to remain strong "Its okay Sanskar. Don't hold back. Cry if you want. Its okay to cry, its okay to express your sorrow. Let it all out Sanskar. Let all the sorrow, pain, anger flow away. It takes a strong man to show bravery, but it takes a stronger man to be able to cry and show his emotions. Let it go Sanskar. Let it all go."

Sanskar could not hold his tears any longer. He cried his heart out in his Badi Maa's arms. He cried for his lost love, cried for all the unfairness he felt, the loneliness, all the wrongs he did, for everything that he has lost...everything. Annapurn let him cry and looked on with sorrow.

After sometime...

Sanskar had calmed down and Annapurna made him sit on the bed. She reached for the nearby table for the glass of water.

"Here Sanskar, have some water."

Sanskar drank slowly and put the glass on the table. "Badi Maa I...I must go to Bade Papa and apologize to him. And also to Laksh."

"Not now Sanskar. It is not the right time. They might not be so forgiving if you tell them now."

"I don't care what happens to me Maa. I-"

"No Sanskar. We got you back after so long. I don't want anything to happen that would make you leave us again." she came near him and looked him in the eyes "Promise me. Promise me that you won't tell anyone anything."

"But Maa-"

"Sanskar please. Your Bade Papa is complete distressed and angry about the loss in business. If you go and tell the truth now, he would never forgive you. He still hasn't accepted you. Sanskar, you must keep acting as you are, try to make him accept you as a son. When he accepts you back to the family, you and I shall reveal the truth to him. Don't tell Laksh either, as he won't hide it from his father. Promise me, Sanskar!"

Sanskar could never deny his Badi Maa's wishes, and he nodded. There was a knock on the door, and Sujata's voice came from outside "Jiji, come quick! Ragini's mother has fainted and Ragini wants to postpone the engagement. Only you can make her understand now. Jiji! Are you there?"

"I'm coming in a minute Sujata. You move on ahead and try to convince Ragini."

"Okay Jiji. But come quick." They heard Sujata rush off.

Annapurna turned to Sanskar "Remember your promise Sanskar." saying that, she unlocked the door and moved out.

Sanskar stood there for sometime, thinking about everything that happened. Slowly, he too moved out towards where everyone was. He reached there in the middle of an arguement between Ragini and her grandmother, Parvati.

"Maa's health is more important than my engagement Dadi"

"She isn't faltally injured! She had just lost consciousness. Its not something that should stop your engagement." spoke her Dadi. Parvati turned to Swara "Swara, take your mother home. We shall continue the engagement."

"Your Dadi is right Ragini. Listen to her please" said Sujata.

"But I want my mother to be here and give her blessings to us. I can't see her in this state while I celebrate one of my most happiest moments. I want her to be present in the engagement."

Sanskar looked at Ragini 'Such an innocent soul. Laksh is lucky to have you as his future wife. I wish he would value you too dost.' However, when he looked at Laksh, he could see him looking at Swara like a love-sick puppy.

'I made Lucky promise me that he would marry Ragini, but will he ever be able to give her the happiness that she deserves? Should I...should I somehow take back my promise, so that both Lucky and Ragini don't suffer in future?'

Sujata tried to convince Ragini again "But Ragini. Your engagement is-"

"I love Laksh dearly. But I value my mother more. I won't get engaged without her being present." Ragini spoke, determined.

Sanskar sighed 'There's the problem. If I take back my promise, Laksh will no doubt cancel the wedding. And ragini would be broken again. I can't do that to her. She has done nothing wrong to deserve so much sorrow and betrayal. She has just been used as a tool by her family. They had shown her dreams of being married to Laksh, and so she created the illusion that Laksh is her true love.'

Sujata was about to speak, but Annapurna interrupted. "Wait Sujata" Annapurna turned to Ragini "Alright Ragini, we won't proceed with the engagement until your mother is well. Swara will take her to one of our guest rooms and she can rest there. When she feels better, we will continue with the engagement in the evening. Will that be alright?"

Ragini gave her a wide smile and nodded.

After sometime...

Shramishtha was put in a guest room and Swara was beside her, while everyone else was in the living room, chatting.

Sanskar however, was in his room, sitting morosely on his bed. 😞

He was thinking about everything that happened in such a short time. For him, it was as if the world had turned a complete 360°. He still found it hard to believe that his reason to live, his quest for revenge.... everything was a lie. After Kavita's death, he had made his revenge the soul purpose of his living. He filled his heart with hatred for the Maheshwaris and the thirst for revenge. However, now that his Badi Maa told him the truth, he didn't know what to do anymore. He felt completely lost and empty.

Suddenly, he felt someone sit beside him on the bed. It was Ragini.

"Oho. My dost seems to be in deep thought today. What is it? Will you not tell you favorite dost what you are thinking about?" she asked with a smile.

'Here we go again. Time to act' thought Sanskar in frustration, but began to play his role "I was, I was thinking of a scenery dost. I... I want to draw dost!"

Ragini chuckled "Alright. Let me get you a paper and a pencil."

She got him the things and he started sketching.

"You know Sanskar, me and Laksh will be engaged today. Aren't you happy? I'll be coming to this house forever after the marriage."

Sanskar paused while drawing, but kept up the act "Really?! You'll stay here and play with me everyday!? Nice!"

"Yes, Sanskar. I will come here forever, to stay with the one I love and play with you."

"Love? You love Lucky?"

"Yes Sanskar. That's why I want to marry him."

"Oh. What is love?" he asked innocently. However, he was planning something bigger in his mind.

"Love? Well its... its something you feel for a person who you want to spend the rest of your lives with. That person brings you happiness. That person would make you feel like you are the most important person for them, they would stay beside you, help you through everything. You know that person from your heart and that the person would keep you forever happy" she tried to explain.

"Oh! I understand now. Lucky brings you happiness, right?"

Ragini smiled and nodded.

"Tell me how. Tell me please!"

"Well Laksh has helped me unite my Maa and Baba. He helped me and Swara when we were facing so many obstacles to reunite them. That made me happy. Also, he is always there when we need him."

'Aha! Got you right where I wanted' Sanskar thought in his mind and suppressed a smirk, so that Ragini doesn't see "You mean like dosti?"

On Ragini's questioning look, he continued "You helped me, saved me from the bad people at the market and also make me happy by playing with me. So dosti is same as love right?" he asked with an innocent face.

"Hahaha... Sanskar, its-" Ragini shook her head "Forget that. Why don't you continue drawing? It's such a beautiful scenery."

"It is, isn't it? I drew it." Sanskar pretended to forget the matter and acted like he was concentrating on the drawing again. However, he knew that his words had the desired effect on Ragini. He sneaked a glance at her and saw her deep in thought. He smirked and got back to drawing.

Ragini's mind was in turmoil. She knew Sanskar wasn't normal, but what he said made her doubt her feelings for Laksh. 'Sanskar made a valid point. What Laksh had done for me and Swara was also something a good friend would have done. But there are other things that he did for me, hasn't he?' Ragini tried to recall, but she couldn't find anything.

"Ragini, you said the person makes you feel impo-impor-...what was it?"

"Important Sanskar"

"Right! How does one do that?"

This got Ragini thinking again 'Laksh has made me feel important, hasn't he? He has given me the importance one gives to the someone they consider their love, hasn't he?' Ragini tried to remember desperately, but she found nothing to recall.

"Sanskar I...I will be back. Keep drawing the scenery, ok?" she rushed out of there.

Sanskar slowly looked up and smiled towards the way she went. 'Finally I know what to do. I can't take back my promise, as it would break your heart. Neither can I let you marry Lucky and let your and Lucky's future be destroyed. But I can make you realize that what you feel for Lucky isn't real. Its your Dadi's dream to see you become Lucky's wife, but its time you realized that its not what your heart wants. Its time you stopped filling colours to the rainbows of others. Dost, now you shall live to fill colours in your own dreams.'

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To be continued...