"I didn't tell you that to make you...feel any kind of way."

Oh no? Sure sounded like it to me! What was I supposed to do with King saying those three little words? Words I just heard from my ex weeks ago?

"I know uh...uh..." I had no words.

Here I was telling King I was ready for sex with him but he shocked me even more saying something I did not expect to hear. He was in love with me. Me? What did I even do to deserve his love?

"Rave, it's cool, stop overthinking." King kissed my forehead. "I've been feeling this way about you for a while and...I didn't see why I needed to hold it in. And seeing you with your parents and family...I guess it has me all soft and mushy."

"It's not soft." Finally, I found my voice. "I think you're incredible."

"I'll take that. We better get some sleep so we can hit the road early."

"Sure."

We watched TV and fell asleep right there on the couch cuddled together. If my father would have come home and seen us like that King would lose all his cool points.

It was the best sleep of my life, having him so close to me smelling good. I dreamed of happily ever after with King. One day we would be married and have kids and a big house and-

Yes, I was getting ahead of myself. I couldn't even tell him "I love you" back. I was not the best girlfriend in the world.

Soon as we woke up, we dressed and stopped to get my morning coffee and a muffin. King drank green tea and had egg bites. Then we were on the road.

I texted my father let him know we were leaving and that I would be back on the weekend to spend time with my sister once she was home from the hospital. I needed to be on campus all week or else I would have just stayed home. I had two projects due. I would leave first thing after I turned in that project to come back to St. Louis.

"You have to work tonight?" King asked me when he pulled up to my residence hall.

"Nope."

"Wanta hang out? We can study if you need or-"

"Sure. That would be fine." I leaned over to kiss him, but I still had no reply to him saying he loved me last night.

I made my exit and headed to my room. I had to think about my feelings for King. Did I love him?

How could I not?

He was a great guy who had done everything right. He was everything I was looking for in a guy. He had the looks, like Diallo. He was smart, like Chantel. Considerate and romantic like Perez. Besides all that, he was perfection even if there was no such thing. He was as close to it as one could get.

But I had to focus and get my head back in my classes. One week of classes and then it was finals week. I was coming into finals feeling pretty good. My classes were not that hard and I was doing well in them so finals were just another test.

Gay, Chandler, and I were going to hang out before my next class. So I'm headed toward the Union and who do I run into? Someone that was not on my good side.

"Donnell, what do you want?"

"I'm not trying to start trouble with yo ass. Have you talked to Chantel?"

Honestly, I had not talked to her in weeks. If she wanted to be with this loser, not listen to what I said about him, I was going to stay out of it.

"No. You two are moving in together or whatever, having a baby, and-"

"That baby ain't mine."

Here we go with all of that again. Why was he stopping to talk to me? I did not want to be in the middle of all of this. I did not want to be friends with someone who would continue to be with someone disrespectful to her. Make it make sense!

"Donnell, I don't care what you or her do, leave me out of it." I walked away from him, ready to relax before my next class.

He grabbed my arm and jerked me back towards him. "Hey, I'm talking to you."

I snatched my arm from his hold, and it took everything in me not to smack him across the face. I stayed calm, thinking about how this would have gone months ago when I was vulnerable and weak. I was not that girl anymore.

"If you ever put your hands on me again it will be the last thing you do."

"Whatever. Tell Chantell to pin that baby on someone else. It's not mine."

I did not want to hear anything more from him so I walked away looking for my friends. I was so mad I was seeing red. I grabbed my phone out of my pocket and texted Chantell. We may not be on a talk everyday basis, but she was my friend from back in the day. I had to know what was going on with her and Donnell.

It was not by business to get in the middle of, but I had to make sure she was okay.

Hey, how's it going?

I knew that was lame to text after not talking to her for weeks. I stared at the phone waiting for her reply, but nothing came so I headed to Gay and I's favorite spot we liked to hang out before class. Gay, Bria, and Chandler were there. These were my friends that I cared about.

"Yo Rayvn, guess who made RA with you!"

"Huh?" I tossed my bag on a chair and sat on the sofa next to Chandler. "How do you know if we made it? Do they contact us or something?"

"Yes, but I was made aware by Samantha. She let me know. I'm sure they will send emails or something. So how cool will this be, us RAs together."

"It's awesome!" I was so excited I hugged Chandler.

"Hold on!" Gay stated. "You two signing on to be snitches like my brother. Great!"

"It's not snitching-" I started to explain to her but she held up a hand.

"Long as I request to be on your floor and you do not snitch on me, we can be cool."

I had no idea which residence hall I would be assigned to. We had to put down three choices and I put down my current hall and two others that looked nice. I for sure did not put my old residence hall where I was sure Diallo would still be RA.

"I can't believe we will be sophomores next year. This year has gone by so fast and it's been...well, not what I expected. Changing dorms, meeting you guys..."

"Stop getting mushy!" Gay shot me a look. "Would we even be friends if you did not date my brother?"

"Yes! We were uh..." I did not want to bring up the kiss. "I met you two at the same time, remember."

"And we know which one you liked the most?" She puckered her lips at me blowing me kisses and I only laughed at her.

"Ooo, what does that mean!" Bria shot out with laughter.

I was not ashamed that my first kiss was with my now-roommate-ex-boyfriend's-sister-now-bestie. Saying it in my head made me laugh as well.

I was still excited about the possibility of being a Resident Assistant next year. I scrolled through my phone to see if I received anything. How could Chandler already know? Did current RAs have a leg up on the news? Anyway, I hung out with my friends for a while talking about nothing then I had to take off for my next class.

I did not want to run into Donnell again and Chantel never texted me back. I was not going to worry about that. Let them keep their drama to themselves.

Soon as I exit the Union, who pops up in front of me? This was not my day.

"Diallo, hey."

I had avoided him as much as possible since he dropped that bomb on me. And with me knowing that his current girlfriend was cheating on him, I could not face him.

"You have some time to talk to me?"

"Uh...not, really, I need to get to my class and-"

"Great, I'll walk with you."

Why didn't I just tell him no? And why did he have to look so cute today? Looks weren't everything, I found that out.

"And congratulations on making RA next year. We'll get to do some things together, like training and meetings, and hang out more. Spend more time together and you should request Dorchester Hall..."

He went on and on, but I was not listening. Another person knew something about my life that I had not learned myself. I was going to speak to Samantha or my hall director right after my last class. I needed to hear it from one of them.

But here Diallo was planning my whole life.

"Diallo, what do you really want?" I interrupted his babbling because now I was annoyed.

"You know what I want. Us back together. Yeah, I know summer break is coming up but we're only two hours away from each other. You could drive to see me every other weekend to hang out and-"

"What about Allura? Why are you talking like this to me when you have a girlfriend."

"We broke up. Well actually, she dumped me. She knows I still have feelings for you, I couldn't hide them."

Yes, that and she had a whole side piece, but he would not hear it from me.

"Rayvn, I love you. I want you and only you."

"I don't love you." Nor did I ever feel that way about him. I liked him from afar, then I liked him the short time we were together, but the way things ended, I never could go back after that.

Besides, there was someone else I had feelings for.

"Rayvn, you're not even giving me a chance. You don't know what you want and you think it's that loser-"

"King is not a loser!" I was so over Diallo. If I could never see him again, that would be great. Just so happened I was friends with his sister. He would continue to show up in my life. "Diallo, this is not about you versus him, it's just that...he's shown me how much he loves me, you never did. He doesn't try to control me or monitor how I spend time with my friends. And he sure does not mind if I have guy friends."

Yo, that was a lot. I shocked myself saying that to Diallo but I meant it. All that pathetic boy could do was stand there and look lost. Yes, for sure, I knew what I wanted now.

"I love King."

A/N: Yesssss! Go Rayvn, go! I love the growth in her, standing up and speaking her mind. Admitting these feelings for the right guy for her.