Wesley

I want to call him but I'm afraid to. I'm afraid that the impact of Aiden's words, that were thrown at him, were too much of a weight on him.

Aiden lost control of himself and was downright mean. I know that there was more to just scolding us and making us see our wrong, in skipping school, but the way he went about everything was not right.

Yes, things had been left under tension between us, but I just can't understand, what else could have set Aiden off. There were times when I would watch Aiden and worry, that he has invested himself too much in being my parent, rather than being my brother. That is where we find ourselves riding on tension, because sometimes he loses that sense of understanding me.

He can forget at times that I also have my own life, to better understand myself, to make mistakes, and to experience what life has to offer for me. He also has a life and as many times as I will say it, that I am grateful to him for looking after me, loving me, and giving me the best life, I get worried when he sets himself aside and forgets that he is still young.

He needs to live and loosen up a bit. I know that we have Luis to worry about, because he is that threat, that has been lingering in our lives. He has been a nightmare for both of us. Luis might have ruined our childhood, but we can't let him have the same power over us now.

We are grown now and our paths prove different, Aiden has a girlfriend now, who also needs his attention, love, dedication and commitment. He is a working young man and also is the greatest human being, that I know. He has dreams and goals, which I am in full support that he can fulfill.

I, on the other hand have friends now, well, if I still have any, after today. Callie is upset with me and Wesley, well, I believe is more than hurt.

What if he doesn't want me in his life anymore, after today?

I blink hard at the sound of that thought.

In such a short amount of time, I can definetly say that I have gotten used to Wesley, being in my life. He is just present in my life and it makes sense for him to be, without us trying to find the reason. Wesley Adams has warmed his way into my life and more over, my thoughts.

I haven't been able to think much about anything else, other than him. I am honestly hurting for him, because I know that he's still coming around, to familiarising with his normal. Wesley is opening up and not hiding away, like he's done for so long.

I just wish what happened today, won't push him back to the beginning.

I wish he won't see himself as a bad influence in my life, because he simply isn't. I hope an opportunity presents itself for me to tell him that.

I try to reach out to him one more time, this time, leaving a message, before placing my phone on the bedside table. I sigh, rising to my feet and heading on to stand by the window, where I lose myself in mindless thinking.

My moment of relaxing and thinking, is interrupted by a knock on the door.

I don't answer but continue staring out the window.

I hear the door open but still, I don't turn around. I'm just not in the mood to talk right now.

" Chloe ?" This voice captures my attention and I glance over my shoulder.

It's surely a surprise to see Ingrid, standing by my door and not Aiden.

"Uh, hey." She says awkwardly, her eyes quickly scanning my room before looking back at me.

" Hi." I respond, not tearing my eyes away from her, feeling curious as to why she's here right now.

" So, uh - Are you okay?"

My brows shoot up in surprise.

" I'm okay, I guess." I shrug, looking back out the window.

" No, you're not." My head whips to her.

" Excuse me?"

" I know that it's not any of my business, but what happened outside ----------"

" What happened was that your boyfriend was a jerk, but hey, it's not something new when you've lived with him your whole life." I shrug.

" I don't think ---------"

" I heard that!!" Aiden calls from somewhere in the house.

" Oh shut up!!" I retort.

" Chloe Ann -"

" You're not my dad, so stop trying to be one and act like my brother for once!!!" I scream, letting out my frustration.

Silence follows after what I said.

As I am cooling down, I take notice of Ingrid, who is still standing in the same place, and she looks both awkward and speechless.

I feel sorry for her, that she has to witness this.

" Sorry about this, but this is part of the package deal that comes with your boyfriend. If your intentions are good and honest, and you see yourself sticking around for the long haul, getting used to this might just have to be on your to do list." I head to the bathroom and before I can close the door, I say, " Thanks for checking up on me."

I leave her there.

                            *******

Aiden and me are currently not in speaking terms. I think it's more from my side and he wants to say something, but something kind of holds him back. I on the other hand am not bothered to try.

He was a jerk to Wesley and that's it. I refuse to always excuse his actions for something, other than what stares me in the face. Two days have passed and it's like I've gone back to square one. I have no one I can call ' friend' currently, because of two things.

1. Callie won't talk to me and is making it obvious, that she's avoiding me. I believe she is still mad at me.

2. Wesley has gone MIA. He's neither been to school or called me back.

He just won't respond.

In truth, I miss him so much. I miss Wesley and his presence. Damn it, he made me get used to him being around, that it doesn't feel right without him. I can't believe that this is me, with a mindset changed suddenly, about a guy who at first, I wanted no association with.

He has found a way to remain in my thoughts and damn it, my heart. I can't forget and neither do I want to. I've always resisted against investing myself in a friendship, it was better being alone.

It always seemed to work for me but now, the feeling of something missing, is strong, and it has been making me restless.

A sigh slips out of my lips as I make my way out of bed, needing something to drink. I make my way downstairs to the kitchen and instead of simply getting a glass of water, I find myself making tea.

I try by all means to not think about Wesley and the current situation, but ofcourse, it proves difficult when I turn around and my eyes meet Aiden, standing by the doorway. Like always, I'm the first to break eye contact and I turn away, finishing up with what I'm doing.

" Why are you up so late?" I hear him ask, but I don't give him an answer.

I quickly finish up and start for the exit.

" I asked you a question, Chloe."

" And I don't feel like responding, Aiden." I say, on my way out.

I hear him sigh out.

I've almost accomplished escaping when I reach the stairs, but ofcourse Aiden won't let me walk away peacefully, because with his next words, they pull me to a stop and my body grows tense.

" Mom used to hurt herself!"

I blink a couple of times, trying to let his words to sink in.

" She did it the same way you did."

I turn around to face him, all thoughts of escaping being thrown out the window.

" Why didn't you tell me?"

" I didn't want to remind you of it." I frown.

So many questions ring in mind and before I can ask him something, he comes closer and takes on the step below the one I'm standing on. I know with what he's just done, he wants me to join him and so I do.

He sighs again, running his fingers through his hair.

" When you were a little girl, around 5 years old, you saw her do it. She was in the bathroom and busy hurting herself, she had the blade against her skin and she looked like she was sucked into a trance. The look she wore, one of relief when she had done it, scared me so much.

It was like she was relieved to have experienced pain or felt something, the most terrifying part was that you were there, standing at the doorway and watching her. You didn't react but just stared."

He looks up at me when he's done talking, and I look away, not wanting him to know that what he has just described, fits so well with how I felt.

I needed to feel something, anything, once I had cut myself, it was like I had finally done something. It's scary to know that mom went through the same thing, not to mention that I had seen her do it.

That must be why it almost felt like a familiar thing to do.

" Chloe?"  I snap out of my thoughts and look down at him. " When I saw those scars, I was reminded by all that and I panicked. I was scared that I would lose you like mom and I mean mentally."

" It still doesn't excuse your behaviour towards Wesley, Aiden."

" Chloe ---------"

" No, you were a real jerk to him and now I may never see him again." I trail off, thinking about the passed two days that I haven't seen him.

" What do you mean?" He asks.

" It doesn't matter anymore." I shake my head."

" Chloe."

" Look, what happened with mom must have haunted you, I understand that. It would have done so to me too. I understand where you were coming from, with how you reacted when you saw my arms and I'm sorry for scaring you.

I know how much you don't want me to get hurt and all, but truth of the matter is that I might get hurt again, somewhere far away from you. It won't always be possible for you to be there, and I will have to stand on my own two feet and face that hurt."

" I know you're right, it's just that ----------"

" I get it. You're used to protecting me and that has scarily made you so committed and devoted to it, that at times, you act like my father."

He opens and closes his mouth but no words come out.

" It's how it is Aiden, and that's how I feel. As hard as it is to admit it, but I already have a dad, and he might not exactly be what I wanted and needed, but it is what it is." I smile sadly at him.

I tear my eyes away from him, when I see his face fall and sadness takes over in his eyes.

" Am I at fault for caring?"

" That's not what I meant Aiden." I say through a sigh. "

" What do you want me to do Chloe?" He says above a whisper, making me to turn to him.

He's no longer facing my way but the tone of his voice, makes me to tense up.

It sounds like he's defeated.

" Aiden?" He doesn't answer or turn to look at me.

I frown and touch his shoulder, wanting his attention. After a minute or so, he does glance up at me and the look on his face, hits me so hard that I have to blink.

He looks so torn and it hurts me to see him like this. Every other feeling I had towards what happened, melts away, being replaced by the pain, of seeing my brother hurting.

" Aiden, please talk to me." I ask in a whisper.

" At times, I find myself asking if moving here was the right decision."

My heart hammers hard against my chest.

" W-what do you mean - do you regret coming here?"

" No where seems safe enough. There is no guarantee of safety, and when it comes to this place, I want to settle down and take a breather, but it's not possible."

" Maybe we have been too relaxed." I let slip.

" Isn't that our right?"

I don't say anything, not having anything to say to that. I take my cup of now cold tea and rise to my feet, walking back to the kitchen to throw it away.

I find myself getting lost in thought, mostly surrounding Aiden, and I place myself in his shoes. My wants and desires just seem small, compared to what he has to deal with.

Everything just concludes to one thing, that Aiden deserves a break.

" Chloe?"

" Hmm?" I turn around to face him.

He leans against the wall, lightly scratching on his arm.

" Have you ever thought about how different things might have turned out, if Luis never existed in our lives?"

" Then that would mean I would have never existed." I chuckle.

He opens and closes his mouth, seemingly thinking over my words.

" Well, I have thought of what it would have been like, If someone else was my father."

" You have?" He says in surprise, his brows rising up.

I shrug, turning around to tidy up.

When I am done and ready to head back to my room, I hault in surprise, when I notice that Aiden has been standing in the same place, looking lost in thought.

" Aiden?" He snaps out of his thoughts, now giving me his attention.

" Are you okay?"

" Yeah." He nods. " Goodnight." He turns away from me.

" Aiden?" I stop him.

He glances over his shoulder at me.

" Do you think it's time we move again?"

He doesn't answer me but the look on his face tells me, that he has been thinking about it.

" Give me your answer after a few days." I say, walking out of the kitchen and to my room.

**********************************

I'm actually surprised on how this chapter ended, I was so into finishing it, that I had to give the ending a double take.

So tell me your thoughtd and don't forget to vote and comment.