"ILANG BUWAN NA nga kayo ulit?"

"Eight months," sagot ni Chippy na may irap, but it wasn't meant for the man occupying Marco's chair across her – his supposed chair. God, what an asshole! Chippy grunts. "Thinking about him makes my blood boil."

They keep the room dim with only the lampshade on top of the bedside table – enough to light the whole room. The floor-to-ceiling glass door that led to the balcony had a double curtain. She keeps half of the blackout curtain close. 'Yong side na hindi angle sa balcony ng room ng lalaki. The other side, itinabi niya lang sa frame ang makapal na kurtina. She keeps that sheer curtain down – enough to hide what's inside the room.

Thankfully may microwave oven sa room. Mathieu did the initiative to preheat the untouched foods on the table. She didn't realize she was hungry not until she smelled the food. Mukhang gutom na gutom din ito kaya naubos nilang dalawa ang mga pagkain.

At least hindi na sayang.

Mathieu chuckles. "Was not love that pushes you to be in that relationship?" He sips on his glass of wine without tearing his eyes off of her. He was suppressing a smile. Hindi niya alam kung pang-aasar o ano.

God, Chi, you didn't even know the man pero kung makipag-converse kayo sa isa't isa ay parang ang dami n'yo nang taong pinagsamahan.

She find this situation weird but does it really matter? He seem harmless at saka kung may balak man itong masama sa kanya. Tatalon na lang siya ng balcony or ihahampas niya ang bote ng wine sa ulo nito. Hopefully, ay hindi siya hahantong sa pagiging-brutal.

She knows she needed a stranger who will listen to her, so she can move forward. Mathieu perfectly fits the role. Pareho nilang hindi kilala ang isa't isa and she doubted if they'll ever meet again. Maliit man tignan ang Cebu sa mapa, but malaki pa rin 'yon. But if her idealogy of destiny disappoints her in the future. She's sure Mathieu will be kind enough to spare her from the inevitable agonizing awkwardness. 

"Well, he was a nice guy," aniya, she could still taste bittersweet in her tone. At the back of her mind, naisip niya na kahit papaano naging masaya rin naman siya sa company ni Marco. "I thought he was different."

Naglapat ang mga labi niya at ilang segundong napaisip sa susunod niyang sasabihin.

"Pero sabi nga nila," dagdag niya na hindi nakatingin sa lalaki. "Too much happiness in this world is surreal, sooner or later it will become a nightmare." Marahas na napabuga ng hangin si Chippy. "And it did... for me." Inubos na niya ang natitirang laman na wine sa kanyang baso pagkatapos.

"That sucks though."

"I know." Chippy stretches her arm forward and angled the empty wine glass she was holding in his direction. She didn't say a word. Automatic na ibinaba ni Mathieu ang hawak na wine glass sa mesa at iniangat ang nangangalahati nang bote ng wine. Nilagyan nito ang baso niya, kaunti lang. "Ramihan mo na," reklamo niya.

Natawa lang ito saka dinagdagan pa nang kaunti. Hindi pa rin nangalahati ang wine sa baso niya. Chippy's upper lip curls in disdain.

"That's enough," anito, ibinalik ulit ang wine glass sa bucket para lumamig. "Hindi mo ma-e-enjoy ang wine kung binabaso mo ang pag-inom. Hindi 'to Coke." Mathieu was just merely smiling but oddly, Chippy could still hear the sounds of his laugh.

Maybe because of his expressive eyes? O lasing na ako kaya dami ko nang napapansin na dapat hindi ko na pinapansin. Fine, he's good looking. Mas guwapo pa sa pisteng yawa na Marco na 'yon.

"Masarap pa rin naman."

"Pero ginagawa mong tubig ang pag-inom."

"Don't argue with me, okay?" pagtataray pa niya. "Ako naman nagbayad sa wine na 'yan." She waves her hand in the air to dismiss whatever Mathieu was trying to rebut after. "Just be thankful. I just saved your life today."

Ramdam ni Chippy ang pamimigat ng tulakap ng kanyang mga mata. Nag-iinit na rin ang kanyang mga tainga at pisngi. She knows her body too well kaya alam niyang medyo tipsy na siya. But need not to worry dahil sanay siya mag-inom. She's still perfectly in control.

Mathieu chuckles. "You're drunk."

"Yup!" proud pa niyang sagot dito. "But trust me, hindi ako madaling mapabagsak." She smugly smiles after. "Don't underestimate me, mister."

He comfortably leans on his seat. "I'm just curious."

"Ano?"

"If girlfriend ka niya at girlfriend din niya ang step-sister mo. Sino sa inyo ang nauna?"

Isinandal ni Chippy ang dalawang siko sa mesa para saluhin ang kanyang magkabilang pisngi. Halos dumikit na ang hawak pa rin niyang wine glass sa kanang pisngi niya. She flinches a little dahil ramdam niya ang lamig no'n sa kanyang pisngi.

"I'd be honest, ako ang kabit."

Namilog ang mga mata nito. Tinitigan niya muna ang mukha nito. She wants to know if she will see any glint of disgust on his face, but she didn't see any. Those soulful eyes express a kind of emotion that shows no judgment. It made her feel comfortable to continue.

"Since my father remarried... I always feel... like I'm an outsider from his family. I couldn't compete with Eunice. She has always been the perfect daughter for his image. While me? I make decisions that will always make him mad."

Pumagitna sa kanila ang ilang segundong katahimikan.

Mapait na napangiti si Chippy. "I have no value. Napapansin lang niya ako kapag gumagawa ako ng mga bagay na ayaw niya."

She studies his face again. Still no sign of judgment pero halata sa mukha nito na nakikinig ito sa kanya. She has meet different guys. Most of them pretend to be so engrossed with her stories, but she knows they were not being genuine. They'll give her a few minutes of their attention and then their eyes will roam somewhere else. Iniisip nila na lasing lang siya and that she wouldn't notice. Those scumbags! Akala yata ng mga gagong 'yon ay maikakama siya ng mga ito for their flop acting.

There were only four men in his life who genuinely cares for her. Her older brother, Sep, Iesus, and Vier. She knows they love her dearly but she couldn't tell these things from them. Dalawang bagay lang ang mangyayari. They will scold her or Iesus will talk to her father. Pero madalas na sermon lang ang nakukuha niya sa apat.

"Marco... he's a childhood friend," she continues. "We met when we were teenagers. Eunice is already with us, so we practically grew up together. Saka matagal ko nang alam ang plano ng mga magulang namin."

"Plano?"

"Cliché as it may sound but mayroon pa ring arranged marriage sa panahon ngayon."

Natawa si Mathieu. "At ikaw ang bride to be?"

Napangiwi si Chippy. "Supposedly, but things have changed. Marco's parents didn't want me. Although kami na before their announcement."

Naningkit ang mga mata ni Mathieu na para bang may kumikirot na sugat sa katawan nito.

"Tragic."

"I know."

"At hindi alam ng tatay mo na kayo na?"

"Nope. He keeps it a secret."

"He? You mean,  the guy Marco? So, it wasn't a mutual agreement then?"

Chippy nodded. "Parang tanga, 'di ba?" Asar na itinuro pa niya ang sarili. "Bakit ako pumayag na itago? Kasi mahal ko ang gago? Tangina, 'di ba? Ang bobo  lang."

"Don't say that," seryosong saway nito sa kanya.

"Totoo naman kasi. Akala ko ipaglalaban niya ang relasyon namin. Dinaan niya ako sa mga mabulaklak niyang mga salita. Naniniwala naman ako. Sabi niya he needs time, so I gave him eight months to think about it. Pero anong napala ko? Wala!  Instead, he has the angst to end our relationship at ipamukha sa'kin na papakasalan niya si Eunice. Alam mo, kung hindi pa niya ako nilaitlait ay baka mapatawad ko pa siya. Pero hinusgahan niya ang buong pagkatao ko pagkatapos ko siyang unawain na parang santo."

Inilapag niya ang wine glass sa mesa. Umayos ng upo saka komportableng isinandal ang likod sa backrest ng upuan niya.

"Tapos isa pala siyang impakto. Magsama sila ng pamilya ko at ni Eunice. Bagay silang dalawa. Sinayang ko lang panahon sa pag-invest ng feelings sa kanya."

In-denial man siya na hindi siya nasasaktan pero nahihimigan pa rin niya ang pagka-bitter niya sa buhay niya ngayon.

Pumagitna ulit ang ilang segundong katahimikan sa pagitan nila. Titig na titig siya rito. Titig na titig din naman ito sa kanya.

"Wala ka bang pangmalakasang advice riyan?" basag niya.

"You're obviously hurting right now."

"Sinabi ko bang masaya ako?" pagtataray pa rin niya. "Imbyerna na imbyerna ako ngayon. Baka ipa-reimburse ko pa sa kanya lahat ng mga nagastos ko rito."

Mathieu chuckles. "Sounds like a nice idea. I support."

"Mga yawa sila. May araw din talaga silang lahat."

"But I disagree –"

"Na yawa sila?"

"No. I'm disagreeing with your statement earlier. I don't think you're the third party. In the first place, naging kayo na bago pa naging komplikado ang lahat."

Natigilan si Chippy sa sinabi ni Mathieu at napatitig dito. He sounded so genuine. Ramdam niya ang pag-iinit ng sulok ng kanyang mga mata na hindi niya mawari.

"Falling in love with him is not something you can control. The future is not something we can foresee beforehand as well. We fall in love at the moment and not because of a good future that awaits that relationship. Sabi nga nila, love and life are always a game. We win some, we lose some. In your case, you trusted his love and kindness for you. You were innocent of the idea that there is a possibility that he might hurt you in the end. Betrayal is the highest form of lies because they allow us to love deeply before they break us apart."

Punyemas na 'yan!

Ayaw niya umiyak. Kahit na punong-puno ng galit ang puso niya para kay Marco ay mayroon pa ring pilit na sumisilip na panghihinayang sa relasyon nila. She wasn't hurting because of what happened. She was hurting with those happy memories she shares with him... because those memories made her truly happy and valued.

Iniwas niya ang tingin at bahagyang inangat ang mukha sa kisame para pigilan ang mga luha. But those damn tears were as hardheaded as hers. Tuluyan na ngang nag-unahan sa pagpatak mula sa kanyang mga mata.

"Tangina naman," mahinang mura niya habang pinupunsan ang ilalim ng kanyang mga mata. "Puwede ba akong magalit na lang sa kanila na hindi umiiyak?"

"If it would make you feel better. Allow yourself to believe that your pain means it saved you from the wrong person." Ibinalik niya ang tingin kay Mathieu. May tipid na ngiti sa mukha nito. "Sadly, not for your step-sister. Unless kung sasabihin mo sa kanila kung gaano siya kagago."

"As if makikinig sila sa'kin."

"You still have time to reconsider."

She doubts that. Her words are not strong enough to make others believe she's saying the truth. Eunice's achievements and perfect life overshadowed her completely. She lost her value the moment her mother and her older brother died.

"I'll think about it."

But it was only a lie dahil hindi na niya kailangang pag-isipan ang sagot.

"You should. I know you hate your step-sister, but she still deserves to know."

"Ano ka ba? Candidate for sainthood?"

Natawa si Mathieu. "Hindi pa ako tapos. I was just about to say. At least all of you are miserable."

Doon natawa si Chippy. "Gage!"

"I'm no saint. I'm far from being that ideal good boy."

"Nag-e-exist pa ba sila?"

"I believe so."

"So, what do you call yourself then?"

Mathieu shrugs both his shoulders and crosses his arms over his chest. "A human being," he grins after.

"I sense that you're not fond of serious relationships. Is it safe to assume that you're the fuck buddy kind of man?"

He chuckles. "That sounds valid."

"Flings."

"Yeah. I've never been into serious relationships. I'm not considering those I've dated in the past. Those were just moments of teenage adorations. It's nothing serious."

"Marami akong kilalang ganyan."

A pique of curiosity shows on his face. "Really? Is it also safe to say that you've been in different relationships before your current ex?"

"Sa ganda ko, sa tingin mo mababakante ako?"

Amuse na amuse ang tingin nito sa kanya. "I am clearly seeing the obvious." Pilyong-pilyo ang ngiti nito sa kanya.

Alam ni Chippy na maganda siya. Thanks to her parents' almost perfect genes. Hindi siya nagmamayabang. Hindi lang siya ang klase ng tao na mahihiya pang aminin 'yon kapag may nagkomento na maganda siya. It's a compliment, whether it's genuine or not, tatanggapin niya 'yon dahil totoo namang maganda siya.

"You have beautiful light brown eyes," nakangiting komento nito.

"Sabi nga nila."

"I'm actually thinking we have the same shade."

Kumunot ang noo ni Chippy. "I don't think so. Yours are almost golden brown."

He smirks. "So, you've noticed."

"It's pretty obvious. I'm sure you lure women with those charming smiles and eyes."

"I see." Lalo itong napangiti. "You find my smile charming."

Naglapat ang mga labi niya. His gaze are beginning to have an affect on her. Hindi niya alam kung siya lang nag-iisip no'n or dahil may alcohol sa sistema niya kaya lumilikot ang isipan niya. She won't deny the fact that he was really good looking.

Pasimple niyang binasa ang mga labi. Hindi niya gusto ang tumatakbong eksena sa isipan niya. For god's sake, this man is practically a stranger yet his smile and gaze fills her mind with erotic scenarios.

Lasing ka na, Chizle! Tama na 'yan. Huwag ka nang mag-isip ng kung anu-ano na pagsisihan mo rin pagkatapos.

"Oh, please don't play coy," akusa niya rito. She needs a diversion. Hindi na siya natutuwa sa mga iniisip niya. "I'm sure you've heard it a lot of times from women you've bedded with."

He smugly smiles, not tearing his eyes at her. "I'm not saying anything."

"You're really good at this, aren't you?" Tinaasan na niya ito ng kilay.

"I don't force women to sleep with me. You can rest well tonight if that worries you."

"Save that for the virgins."

Lalo lang itong na amuse sa naging response niya. He doesn't need to know, aniya sa isip. She's bold and straightforward. Hindi siya ang prim and proper na umaarteng birhen when it comes to sex. She speaks her mind. Kaya nga lagi siyang napapaaway dahil sa talas ng bibig niya. She didn't want men to think she was clueless. She knows a lot of things, she just didn't have enough courage to put it into action or do it with a man.

Well, almost!

Pero nang mga oras na 'yon ramdam niya ang pagrerebelde ng katawan niya. Well, it has always been her fantasy to sleep with a stranger. Kapag naisip niya 'yon ay gusto niyang sabunutan at ipasipa sa limang kangaroo ang sarili. Malandi talaga ang utak niya pero isa siyang malaking duwag.

Kasalanan talaga 'to ng walangyang 'yon! Sinusubok niya pagkababae ko. Hindi siya kawalan. I can have sex with anyone.

"Maybe we should sleep," maya-maya ay anunsyo ni Mathieu.

"Inaantok ka na?"

"It's getting late. Masama sa katawan ang pagpupuyat." Tumayo ito para ayusin ang mga nagulong ayos ng baso at plato sa mesa. Nakangiti pa rin ito habang nag-aayos.

Hindi mapigilan ni Chippy ang matawa. "Hindi mo ako maloloko. Alam ko na nagpupuyat ka. Don't give me that bullshit."

"Nagpupuyat ako sa ibang rason," may pilyong ngiti sa mukha nito nang iangat ang tingin sa kanya.

She seductively crosses her legs in front of Mathieu without tearing her eyes off of him. Nasundan niya ang pagtingin nito sa kanyang legs at pasimpleng paglunok. Naglapat ang mga labi nito at bahagyang kumunot ang noo.

I will really kill you, Chizle Priscilla Garcia!

"You're not trying to seduce me, aren't you?"

"I'm sure you do one-night stands."

He chuckles. "I don't sleep with women who just got their hearts broken a while ago."

"That isn't fair!"

Natawa ito. "And you're drunk."

"Hindi pa ako lasing. Kaya ko pang i-recite sa'yo ang buong multiplication table."

"Nice. Math wizard."

"But let's start with nine times nine dahil alam kong eighty-one ang sagot. The rest, i-Google mo na lang."

"Akala ko ba sauludo mo?"

"I changed my mind. Alphabet na lang."

He crosses his arms over his chest and stands in front of her like a formidable Greek God. There was something erotic in the way he was looking at her. Para bang hinuburan na siya nito at gustong-gusto nito ang nakikita nang mga oras na 'yon. A sex god is hiding behind those innocent soulful eyes.

It was her turn to gulp.

She had never been so turned on by a man before. Kahit kay Marco ay hindi niya ramdam ang ganoong spark. It was almost combusting. Her desire to make love with Marco was passion-driven – she was emotionally attached to him.

But with Mathieu, it was sinfully tempting even though she hardly knew the man.

"I won't say no if you're willing to do it with me," basag ni Mathieu.

Chippy's heart is starting to pound crazily. The sudden change and hoarseness in his tone are slowly awakening her carnal desires for him.

Nababaliw na yata siya. Init na init ang pakiramdam niya. She was just holding herself from keeping her hands from the strong urge of lavishing him. This time, isisisi na niya sa nainom na alak sa sistema niya ang kalandian sa isipan niya.

"But one thing must be clear between us," dagdag nito.

"Ano?"

"I don't want you to regret it."