It was a new dream.

I was in an old-fashioned office. I recognized it from Charlie's dumb movie; it was the scientist's study, with the stuffed moose on the wall and papers scattered across the floor.

Any detail of the scene left my mind when I saw Jisung Han on the other side of the room, staring at me. His clothes were worn and his expression was wary. His soft brown skin seemed to shine every colour on the wheel, despite the dream being in black and white.

I marched toward him. I didn't even stop to think. I wanted to touch him, I needed to know he was real — not a hologram or a hallucination or a ghost. Maybe if I reached him in time, I could finally know for certain he was—

Real. I touched his shoulder, felt his undeniable flesh and bone. I was stunned for a moment, trading glances between his face and where we were touching.

"Jisung," I said blankly.

I looked at him when he didn't answer. He was still staring at me — his face unreadable — and his eyes were glowing vibrant gold. Then he smiled, and I could see a row of delicate, pointed teeth just behind his lips.

I catapulted upright in my bed, just as quickly falling back and groaning, cupping my face in my hands. It was still dark, and a glance at my clock told me it was five-thirty.

I sat up again, feeling dizzy and drunk on exhaustion. My mind was going too fast for my body.

First things first, I told myself — happy to procrastinate. Shower.

I made my way to the bathroom and turned the water on. It didn't take as long as I hoped — even with blowdrying my hair, which I didn't do unless I wanted to look nice or kill time. I wandered back to my room and made my bed, staying in my embarrassing bacon-and-pancake patterned pyjamas.

I bit the bullet. I booted up the computer on my desk.

Charlie's internet sucked. It dragged on for so long that I gave up and went to get a bowl of cereal to pass the time. I chewed carefully, staring into space, washed the bowl and spoon, and put them away. I took my time climbing the stairs, stopping halfway to the top to sigh forlornly, and then kept going.

I dropped down into my desk chair — setting my hand on the mouse and wielding it like a sword. A bunch of pop-up ads flew to the foreground, and I closed each one, muttering louder and louder every time it tried to sell me life insurance for my grandchildren.

Finally I made it to the search engine, and I typed in one word.

Vampire.

It took a frustrating amount of time to load, of course. I pushed away from the desk and spun in my chair. When the results came up, there was a lot to go through. Everything from Bram Stoker's Dracula to Underworld to Blade to Charlie's movie were right there in the top spots, as well as some gothic cosmetics and LARP community group-chats, heavy metal bands and Hot Topic.

Then I saw a promising site. Vampires A-Z. When the screen loaded, it had a simple white background with black text. Seemed legit — except it was a vampire website and I was literally losing my marbles.

I scrolled down the page, reading the description of each entry. Most seemed like characters from old novels, the novels that depicted women as helpless dolls who only existed to submit to the abusive will of men — even men who weren't technically human. I kept scrolling.

None caught my eye. They were all either undead beasts or smooth-talking players, and I don't know which I hated more. A lot of them included superhuman strength, many mentioned beauty and cold skin — but they all clashed with what I knew of Jisung. Not one single entry said that a vampire could be kind. Could be soft spoken and funny and careful and... human.

I growled at nothing in particular and yanked the power cord from the wall.

I stormed downstairs and angrily whipped up a bowl of ice cream for myself. It was an indulgence; my internet raid pissed me off to a degree that only ice cream could mollify. Also I just wanted ice cream.

I felt guilty as well, which was harder to remedy. I watched an old vampire movie and immediately thought of Jisung? Why would I make that connection? Why would my brain make that leap?

After I finished my therapy ice cream, I washed out the bowl and spoon — yet again. I had nothing to do, so I ambled to the living room and stared at the wall.

Literally stared at the wall. I thought about my life so far, my recent experiences, what I had to get done in the next days, and — obviously — Jisung. I was so riveted that I didn't notice when Charlie came downstairs and called my name.

"Minho? Minho?"

He found me and approached cautiously, waving his hand in front of my face.

I glanced up at him. "Oh, hi, Dad."

He looked concerned, but left me to my introspection.

At some point, I tore my eyes away from the wall and made my way upstairs. I got dressed for the day, just jeans and a hoodie, since I'd be staying in. I had arranged all my thoughts into their own categories — 'obsess' and 'ignore' — so I could focus on a paper I had to write before Wednesday.

It was a quiet day, filled with deep thought... and then distraction whenever a squirrel would skitter across the power lines outside my window. Squirrels reminded me of Jisung — as well as dense forests and vampires, apparently.

I finished my paper by eight in the evening. Charlie came home from the docks with a couple of fish stuffed into a cooler; I made a mental note to pick up a book of fish recipes when I was in Seattle next week...

A chill ran up my spine, squeezing at the top of my head. I'd half-forgotten Jisung had asked to drive me there. So much had happened since. Would he really make plans with me only to die? He wasn't getting out of it that easily.

Thinking about it got me excited. Would we take his car or mine? His was more comfortable, but I kind of wanted to show him I was just as good a driver as he was. Would he have any errands to run for himself? Could I come with him? Maybe I could find a bookstore somewhere else, and then the day could be freed up — nothing to do but talk and talk and talk... I found myself planning out my first words to him when we met again. 'Miss me?'

~ * ~

The next morning, I awoke in the same way as every day before it — shaken to consciousness by an unsettling dream. I pulled the covers over my head and curled into a ball, whining under my breath.

When I broke free of my blanket-cocoon, I saw sun shining in my window. It was the second sunny day since I'd arrived in Forks — it made me happy...

In addition to other stuff that was making me happy — like that it was finally Monday. Maybe he would be at school today.

Charlie was reading the newspaper and finishing breakfast when I got downstairs. He picked up on my good vibes quickly.

"Nice day," he said.

"Yup," I replied, smiling.

He smiled back, and I could almost see the face of the young guy who eloped with my mom two decades ago. He was still there, under the scruff and moustache and crinkly skin, and it was cool to say hi to him.

I ate breakfast happily, watching the dust motes float around in the light. I held my hand under one stream of sun from the stained glass above me, wondering if Jisung would say my skin looked beautiful, if he was here to see it.

I couldn't get my truck's windows down, because they were ancient and rusty and mean. I considered punching through the glass, but I decided that was unnecessary, among other things. I was still happy.

I was the first to pull into the school's parking lot. I'd been in such a rush to get outside, I hadn't even checked the time.

I parked and made my way to the picnic benches to the south of the cafeteria. I sat down and pulled out my Trig homework, glaring at the problems I was unsure of. I was tapping my pencil against the paper, leaving little marks...

I started doodling. I was daydreaming within a second, totally spaced out.

"Minho!" someone called. My head whipped up.

It was just Mike. He was walking toward me in a striped Rugby shirt and shorts. I cringed internally.

Then I saw school was in session. Kids were all over the place, like ants around an anthill. I hadn't noticed.

"Great day, isn't it?" Mike sat on the picnic bench and let his back fold in half. He was going to be one of those middle-aged people who always complained that their spine hurt and didn't know why.

"Yup," I said.

"We had a great time at the beach."

Subtle. "Good. Am I forgiven for bailing?"

"Yeah, it's okay. You have to come next time, though. It's mandatory."

I didn't know when the next time was, but I was almost sure I was busy that day.

"How was hiking?" he asked then.

"It was really fun."

"Worth ditching?"

I had no idea how to respond to that. "Uh-huh?"

He nodded. "What else did you do?"

"I worked on my essay a bit."

He smacked himself like there was a mosquito on his face. "Oh yeah, that's due Thursday, right?"

"Wednesday."

"Ooh." One half of his lip lifted anxiously. "That's not good. What are you writing yours on?"

"Queer representation in fiction."

He stared at me like I'd spoken in Plattdeutsch.

"I guess I'll have to work on that tonight." He picked at a thread hanging off his sleeve for a moment before he spoke again. "Hey... are you going to ask Jessica to the dance?"

My eyebrows shot down. "What? No."

"Why do you say it like that?" He looked like he was preparing to defend Jessica's honour.

"Because she's into you."

"What?" His forehead creased, and he leaned forward like he'd heard me wrong.

"She's. Into. YOU," I enunciated. He looked away, clearly dazed. I exited stage left while I had the chance.

"Better get to class." I swung my backpack over my shoulder and stood. I walked toward English, and Mike followed me — still deep in thought. I hoped he was connecting the right dots.

When I saw Jessica in Trig, she said that she and Angela were planning a trip to Port Angeles that night. Dinner at an Italian place and dress shopping for the spring dance. I was invited, and I would have been into it, but my brain was buzzing with other worries. I played indecisive and gave her a maybe, saying I'd have to talk with Charlie first.

Jessica talked my ear off all the way to Spanish, and then continued as if she'd never stopped when class ended. I was too nervous to hear her as we made our way to lunch, too busy trying to calm my own heart to a healthy speed. I was excited to see him, so much it was painful. I had hundreds of questions — was he a vampire? Would we be sitting together again? Did he survive the bears? — and I knew he wouldn't answer any of them. Oh well. Maybe he would smile and I would faint and he would catch me.

As usual, my eyes found his family's table immediately upon entering the cafeteria. I almost fell when I saw that it was deserted. Not a single one of them was there. I scanned the rest of the room, looking for him. The table we'd sat at last time was empty, too. I stamped the floor, needing a physical outlet for my Angst.

Jessica looked at me funny.

"Rock in my shoe," I muttered.

We joined Jessica's friends at the regular table. I noticed that Mike kept the space next to him free for Jessica. She seemed happy about that. Angela asked a few questions about the essay due Wednesday, and I answered as intelligently as I could without letting her know I was both crushed and panicking at the same time. She, too, invited me to the Port Angeles trip, and I agreed this time, grasping at any distraction.

I realized I'd been unconsciously holding onto some last crumb of hope when I entered Biology and saw that his chair was empty. Disappointment hit me like an asteroid hits a poor, dumb dinosaur. While I waited for class to start, I rested my head on my forearms and hissed under my breath.

The rest of the day passed like molasses through a straw, and I rolled with it in something like misery. It was stupid I was feeling so... much, about this. How badly was I whipped to go into a depression just because he missed a day of school? Unless he really was dead by way of bear attack and I was right all along. The thought made my hands shake.

I was happy to get off school grounds, back home, where I could let my gloom show. I left my backpack in my room, and then moped down the stairs and stared at my Staring Wall again. At some point, I fell back on the couch, and stayed there until the phone rang.

It was Jessica, calling to cancel the Port Angeles trip. Mike asked her out, and the rest of us immediately morphed into giant slabs of chopped liver to her. I tried to sound happy, but I just ended up screeching a lot. The outing was rescheduled for tomorrow night.

I didn't have much else to do. I had a fish marinating for dinner, and threw some salad stuff in a salad bowl to make salad. I wrote a fanatical e-mail to my mom. I spent a tense hour on homework. Then I went back to the Staring Wall. It hadn't moved.

Next thing I knew, I heard the sound of the cruiser outside. I stretched my arms above my head, and caught a glimpse of the clock. Goddamnit.

I hurried to the kitchen and switched the oven on.

A moment later, Charlie peeked in the door.

"Dinner is late because I'm confused," I told him, holding a wooden spoon in my mouth for no reason. "Sorry."

"No problem, Minho," he said. "I wanted to check the score on the game anyway."

"Which game?" I asked.

He laughed like I'd told I joke, and lumbered toward the living room.

I watched TV with Charlie after we finished dinner. I wasn't into the game — it turned out to be football — but I didn't have anything else to do besides spiral. Plus, Charlie would probably worry if he saw me staring blankly at the wall again.

"Dad," I said during a commercial break, "Jessica and Angela are going to Port Angeles tomorrow to look for dresses, and they invited me. Do you mind if I go with them?"

Charlie's eyebrows lowered. "Jessica Stanley and Angela Weber?"

"Yup."

"You're going with them?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Because they're my friends."

His eyebrows finally lifted, and the corners of his mouth tugged up. "Two girls, eh, Minho?"

"Sexist, Dad. Think before you speak."

He laughed. "Sure, whatever you want."

I mumbled a "Thanks" and took my leave.

~ * ~

It was sunny again in the morning, and I could feel myself getting spoiled. The next time I woke up to pouring rain it would destroy me.

When I got to school, I searched (desperately) for the silver Volvo. Nada. I felt like yelling at all the other cars for being stupid and not Volvos and not his.

He wasn't in the cafeteria, and he wasn't in Bio. I couldn't help but make the mistake of hoping to see him any place there was a chance, and every single time it hurt worse when I was wrong. My heart sank so deep I wasn't sure if I'd be able to find it later.

After school, Jessica shadowed me home so I could get rid of my backpack and truck. I packed eighty bucks into my wallet (for my cut of dinner, and just in case I found a bookstore) and stuffed it into my jacket pocket. I almost smiled as I contemplated getting the hell out of Forks, but it was short lived.

I ran out to join Jessica, and we set off to Angela's house. She was there, waiting for us, and she climbed into the back seat with me.

I wrinkled my nose at the 'Welcome to Forks' sign as it flew past us and disappeared out of sight.

~ * ~

Jessica drove at least ten miles over the speed limit the entire way to Port Angeles, so we arrived in the small, pretty town by four. We listened to subpar pop while Jessica blabbed about boys.

"I mean, I'm happy Mike asked me out, and I had a great time, but picture this: he asks me on a date, and he puts a pause between the 'will you go' and the 'out with me.' Does that mean he's just asking because he takes pity on me?"

"I think that means he's nervous," Angela said.

I made a quiet sound in agreement.

Jessica sighed. "Boys are weird — no offence, Minho."

"It's okay. We are super weird."

"Is there any way you could stop being so weird and just be normal?"

"I'm trying, but I can't speak for the rest of them."

"It feels like we have a man on the inside," Jessica giggled. "Here's a question: how can we know if you want to kiss us?"

"We're waiting for you to kiss us, actually."

She gasped like it was a revelation.

"Have you ever kissed someone?" Angela asked.

"Once. It was on a dare and it was really, really bad." My mother forced me to go to that sleepover, and I was still bitter about it.

"Did you get trapped together by your braces?" Jessica laughed.

"How did you know I had braces?"

"You seem like that kind of guy."

I harrumphed.

"I'm pretty sure the 'braces getting caught' thing is a myth," Angela chimed in.

"And you would know," Jessica snickered.

Angela looked a little hurt.

"You're right — it's a myth," I said. Angela smiled at me, and then looked back out her window. The conversation fizzled.

Jessica plowed straight to the biggest department store in town. Inside, it was brightly lit and not very clean, but there was an air of excitement as we scoured the aisles. Jessica was drawn to every pink bundle of fabric, and it was up to me and Angela to point her away every time. Angela had better taste; she found a beautiful deep red dress with long sheer sleeves.

Jessica picked out a baker's dozen, so Angela and I waited outside the changing rooms while she tried them on. Angela hauled Jessica's rejects to me, and I brought them back to their racks.

Angela was set on the red dress, and Jessica decided on a fitted sky-blue one. We made our way to the shoes and accessories after that. Jessica drifted over to the necklaces, and Angela and I sat down in the shoe aisle.

She held up a pair of scary heels.

"What do you think?"

I wrinkled my nose.

She put them back.

I fidgeted while she tried on a sensible flat.

"Um, Angela?" I asked.

"Uh-huh?" she replied.

I chickened out. "Try these." I handed her a pair of Goddess-style sandals.

"Ooh," she cooed, taking them.

"Angela?" I said again.

"Yeah?"

I kept my eyes on the shoes. "Is it normal for, um, Dr. Bang's kids to miss school a lot?"

"Yes, actually," she replied, looking at the shoes as well. "When the weather is good, they go backpacking all the time. Even the doctor. They're really into hiking and that kind of stuff."

She didn't ask why I wanted to know — I appreciated it. Then she turned to me and squealed softly, telling me she loved the sandals I had suggested. I smiled, but it was hard to keep my expression buoyant. The sun wasn't feeling like such a blessing anymore; as long as it shone, Jisung wouldn't come to school, and I wouldn't see him. Goddamn outdoorsy vampire.

Jessica wafted over and dragged us to the jewelry display box, where she told us she had her eye on a particularly obnoxious brooch. I tried to steer her away from it, but it was a lost cause.

We had planned to eat dinner at an Italian restaurant on the boardwalk, but the dress shopping had taken up less time than we expected. Jessica and Angela were going to take their haul back to the car, and then walk down the bay. I decided to find a bookstore, so I told them I'd meet them at the restaurant in an hour. They walked off toward the car, and I headed in the direction Jessica pointed out.

I found the bookstore without a hitch. It wasn't the kind of shop I was looking for, but I wasn't going to wander around a strange town looking for the 'right' kind of bookstore. (I wasn't that much of a persnickety twit.) Besides, it was not often that I was completely alone, with eighty bucks in my pocket, in a place where I was all but anonymous, and given a chance to heal spiritually.

I smiled at the lady behind the desk, and then started roaming the aisles, wide-eyed.

I saw a guide to finding inner peace through one's all-knowing protector, the majestic Unicorn. I figured I needed a little inner peace. The lady at the counter rang me up, and she threw in a free prism because she "liked my aura." I awkwardly returned the sentiment without really knowing the implications of what I was saying.

I closed the door behind me, and found myself alone on the street. I had asked the clerk what time it was, and I still had half an hour before I had to meet Jessica and Angela at the restaurant. I decided I'd find the building and wait for them outside. I made my way down the route Jessica had shown me on the map... I thought. I'd seen the words 'Goat Rocks' on the far side of the map and gotten distracted.

I slinked down a quiet street, speeding up when I saw a couple of glass-fronted shops. I peeked through the windows — one was a model train store and the other was just a bunch of mirrors. I spun around a few times, huffed, and stomped in the direction I was pointed.

I realized I was going the wrong way — most of the buildings were warehouses. I turned in a circle again, looking around. I decided to try my luck at the next corner.

A breeze blew in off the ocean, and I stuffed my hands in my pockets. I found — with the exclamation of a certain improper word — that my wallet was gone.

I spun around again — my eyes scanning the pavement and my hands extended uselessly. I was about to start panicking when I saw something reflect the light from the streetlamp. I ran back and picked it up, and, thank god, it was my wallet.

I was still sifting through its contents when I turned the corner and almost bumped into a group of four men.

I was startled — I dropped my wallet again. I bent down and scooped it up before looking at the men. They all seemed middle-aged, hats obscuring their faces, and their eyes were switching between me and the money poking out of my wallet. I forced a smile, and then walked around them, continuing down the street.

Heavy-booted footfalls trailed behind me. I walked faster, focussing on keeping my breathing even. I could see the men's shadows stretch out in front of me when a streetlight shone overhead. I walked even faster, half-running, not daring to look back.

I finally got to the end of the alley. I hoped I could turn the corner, follow the fence and find a busier street. If they caught up to me, were they going to mug me? Kidnap me? Murder me? (Goddamn, that escalated quickly.) Where was my vampire crush when I needed him? Where was my cop dad? Where was Jessica and her strangely muscled forearms?

I turned the corner, and the chainlink fence curved around me, locking me in like a cage.

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sorry if that last part is stupid -- i'm not good at suspense :/

hope you enjoyed <3