Prelude

I'd never given much thought to how I would die. Maybe I should have, considering the company I'd been keeping.

Death was the farthest thing from my mind. Life was captivating me more than it ever had. Finally my story had a moral, finally my existence seemed full — overflowing with possibilities and hope...

In hindsight, it was misguided. This was never going to end well.

I couldn't make myself feel regret for it. I could never regret my time with him, however fleeting it was destined to be.

My limbs were frozen as I fell back. Fear was only on the periphery of my senses, just out of focus. All I could hear was my family's roars echoing off the trees, and all I could see was the blood-red eyes of the predator as he leapt forward to kill me.

Chapter 1

I watched the flat surface of Phoenix fly past me from the passenger seat of my mom's car. The windows were rolled down, and the dry air blew into my face as I dived headfirst into my bleak thoughts.

In the Olympic Peninsula of northwest Washington State, a small town named Forks existed under the cover of near-constant rain and clouds. My dad still lived there, but my mom had survived it — she ran screaming from its limits with baby-me tucked under her arm. I'd had to go there for summers until I was fourteen — and then immediately put a stop to it.

Now I had banished myself to this damp, insignificant array of buildings and streets, and — oh, my god — it was only hitting me now: I was going to have to live there. Goddamnit.

I only brought one duffel bag of clothes and books and whatever else, and my carry-on was a rain coat. My mom walked along next to me, organizing my documents in a way that I'd definitely have to reorganize later. 

Then it was time to say goodbye, which made my heart sink deeper into my chest than it already was. My mom held her hands to my cheeks and turned my face to her. She was crying; it bothered me. Not that I wouldn't be crying myself to sleep tonight — and the night after that, and so on and so forth — but I didn't need to see it, just like she didn't need to see me.

"Email me when you get there, Minho," my mom said, petting my hair.

I smiled pathetically. "I will."

"I feel like I'm abandoning you," she said. "You can come back anytime. I'll be there for you."

"Yeah," I replied, looking down. "I just want you to be happy."

Now she smiled, and her brown eyes lost some of the gloss. "You're too good to me."

I shrugged.

"Say hi to Charlie for me."

"Yeah. Bye, Mom."

"Bye, sweetie." She wrapped her arms around me and hugged the air out of my lungs. I could go a few seconds without breathing. I hugged her back, sighing glumly into her shoulder. I loved my mom. I loved her like I loved nothing else. 

The airport was boring, until I was late for my flight and had to run to catch it. I almost missed it, but I called for the staffer to 'wait, stop, oh, my god, please' just as they were sliding the door to the tube shut. Panting and disheveled, I was ushered onto the plane like a chicken that hadn't made it into the coop before sundown. 

I was then seated between a person with a large folding map and an already-drunk CEO-type in a suit. I closed my eyes and thought about how the plane could malfunction and crash and we could all die. You know, to cheer myself up.

It was a four hour flight, which gave me time to think. (Not that I hadn't already thought all of this through ten times over. What's one more go-around to distract myself from the wailing infant a few rows back?)

I wondered how I would manage to afford a car and new clothes. I needed a car because Charlie was a cop, and driving around in his cop-cruiser was literally the worst thing ever. All I'd ever wanted was to keep inconspicuous, which was hard in a close-knit town like Forks, and even harder when your very presence strikes fear into the hearts of the lawless. I needed new clothes because my wardrobe was built to accommodate Phoenix weather (which was hot and dry) and would not withstand Forks weather (which was the opposite).

I thought about the people at the high school. All those kids had known each other since kindergarten. I'd stick out like a sore thumb, and they'd stare and gossip and whisper about me like I was just a walking, talking slab of meat...

And then I wondered if I'm an actual egomaniac. I settled that thought pretty quickly with an affirmative nod. The travel-lady next to me gave me a look, and I smiled tightly in return.

The plane finally landed, skidded and bumped to a halt. I could see out the little square windows; it was raining, which wasn't a surprise, but it made my shoulders slump regardless. 

I traipsed through the motions — in the line, out the door, through the tube, into the open — with a scowl. I needed to get it out before I saw Charlie.

There he was — waiting by the doors. I smiled and waved.

"Minho," he said. "Let me take that."

I gave him my duffel bag. "Hi, Dad. Thanks."

Charlie hugged me in that stiff one-armed way, clearing his throat. "How are you?"

"Good." Lie.

"How's your mom?"

"She's good, too. She says hi." I could tell what his next question would be, so I said, "My flight was also good."

He closed his mouth, bobbing his head up and down. We walked to the cruiser — sigh — and I got in the passenger side.

 It was an hour's drive to Forks from here. Worse than any plane. Charlie was bad at human interaction. Maybe it was with everyone, maybe it was only with me, so I might have been bad at human interaction, too.

"I found you a car," Charlie said as we pulled out of the airport parking lot.

"Really?" I asked.

"Yup. Cheap. Cool."

I was intrigued. "Where did you find it?"

"You know Billy Black up at La Push?"

"No."

"We used to go fishing together."

Ah. That's why I didn't remember. I made sure to dump all useless and/or painful memories into the metaphorical trash bin in my mind instead of dwelling on them.

"What kind of car is it?"

"A truck. A Chevy."

I knew that one. "Okay. How much is it?"

"Actually, I already bought it for you, son," Charlie said. My eyes opened wide. "Welcome to Forks."

"Wow, Ch— Dad, that's awesome. Thank you so much." I stared ahead as I said this. That's something good about talking in the car — just keep your eyes on the road and there's no awkward staring.

"Um, you're welcome," Charlie said sheepishly.

Later, we parked in front of Charlie's mundane house. It was so mundane and unremarkable it should have belonged to a teen romance flick. But in the driveway, there was a weirdly un-boring vehicle — mid-size, scuffed up, a dusty red colour. I blinked in its direction. 

I got out of the cruiser and walked over to the truck. It made a metallic clank when I put my hands on the rim of the trunk. I moved over to the cab, looked in through the window at the worn fabric on the bench seat and the fuzzy dice hanging from the rear view mirror. It had serious vintage vibes. Not very inconspicuous, but I still wanted to drive it.

Charlie sidled up behind me. "It's cool, right?" 

"Yeah, it's amazing. Thank you." I touched his shoulder for a second.

"It's fine." Charlie sauntered toward the house. I followed him.

The inside of the house was the same as it always had been. The couches, the curtains, the coffee table with a decorative bowl of plastic fruit that Charlie got a kick out of. The pictures on the walls, too — all of the family. Charlie hadn't taken them down after we left. That was the most uncomfortable thing about being in the house, about looking into Charlie's wrinkly eyes. I knew he'd never gotten over my mom, and never gotten over what our family could have been. I hadn't, either, in all honesty.

I shadowed Charlie upstairs and into my room. It was the same, too — it never changed, except for a desk and a disagreeable computer that had appeared as I grew older. Charlie smiled at me from under his moustache and left me to unpack. I didn't censor my facial expressions as I dropped my clothes and books wherever I saw fit. I lay down on my bed and sighed until I started coughing. I could hear the rain tap on the roof above my head, and I swore in a hiss.

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hey, if you liked this, i think you'll like Nightfall! it's this book rewritten from Jisung's point of view. more angsty romance, more time with his brothers, new cute moments, everything! hope you like that too