"That's awesome! Do you think Jake will actually stay dedicated?" Max asked.

"I'm not sure, but he better since he came to me about it!" Vidia contemplated.

"I heard someone  was the life of the party last night," Katie said as she poked Alice.

"I'm always like that at parties and stuff, it's just how I am! Especially when I know there's a bunch of cute guys watching me," she winked and Katie and I both giggled. "But what I want to know, is where you two were last night," Alice question Katie and Max. They both blushed and looked at each like lovers do. What happened next was a mixture of nervous reactions and shy smiles.

"Oh we were just, you know, talking?" Max said as he ran his hand through his hair.

"Yeah, and we had some pizza, and tried some of the eccentric  desserts," Katie sighed as she rubbed her thumbs in her lap.

"We definitely  did dessert. We took a few, just a few, bottles of soda each and went to Katie's quarters," Max exaggerated.

"But all we did was talk and hangout. So if anyone asks, that's seriously, all  we did," Katie confirmed. We all nodded unsurely and went back to our meals. After several awkward moments, a sudden feeling washed over me.

"This feels like deja vu, but I can't place it! Alice, what exactly did I do last night?" I asked. She never got a chance to answer because Alex came around and was up to his doing no-good self.

"Alice, you had some pretty slick moves last night. Who were you trying to attract?" Alex asked.

"None of your darn business! I don't have to answer to the likes of you," Alice barked in his face.

"Fine!" he barked back. "What about you Sarah? I saw you over there in the corner flirting with the Commandos. Ya'll seemed to be having a great  time. You do  know, it's really not smart to do that when you're drunk and besides, they're just a little  too old for you, don't you think?" he sneered. I was horrified! How could I of have been so stupid? "What's wrong, can't remember stuff? It's ok, I mean really, it is, because you could ask anyone since they all  saw it," Alex rubbed it in thick. Everyone had seen me? I thought being in the corner would surely shield me from most of the party goers.

"Alright, that's enough Alex," Vidia said.

"Hold on, one more thing. What I can't understand is how you can't remember a thing, but yet Commander Howlett remembers everything," Alex pointed out.

"What?! But, how? We both got drunk. In fact, all  of us in that corner got drunk and when I got there, they were already drunk," I remembered; Alex threw his hands in the air.

"Couldn't tell you, but Commander Howlett remembers it crystal clear, as if it were yesterday. Oh wait a minute," he said dumbly as he put his hands on his cheeks, "maybe that's because it was  yesterday."

"Alex, I-think-you-made-your-point," Vidia gritted her teeth. Alex put his hands up in defense.

"Have it your way," he said innocently as he backed away.

"I'm not very hungry anymore," I said as I wiped my mouth and pushed my chair in.

"Where are you going?" Max asked.

"I just need some time to process what I heard," I snapped.

"Sarah, it's no use. Alex was trying to hit a nerve," Vidia called after me, but I shook my head. I didn't care what they thought, I got drunk, everyone had seen it, and I had no one to blame for it but myself.

It was a few days later when things got weird. Not only did Katie tell me that everyone was getting lazy about going to training, but that I was also the hot gossip. I couldn't take it! Never have I ever been so humiliated before! I was hiding from the crowds as well as I could. Today in particular, I went straight to the storage room and took the long back way. I figured if I went that way, I wouldn't have to face my colleagues; It didn't quite work out that way because Commander Howlett found me soon enough.

"Sarah," he called. I shook my head and walked away, but of course, he caught up to me and blocked my path. "About last night, I-"

"No, I don't want to talk about it," I said firmly. Commander Howlett looked at me taken back as I walked away.

"What's wrong with you? We laughed and joked all evening and then you don't even want to talk to me?"

"Look, I said I don't want to talk about it," I said more aggressively. He checked the hallway and looked at the storage room door. He grabbed my arm and drug me through the door. Holding my shoulders, Howlett looked me in the eye.

"What is going on Sarah?" he whispered.

"I uh..I um," I stammered and looked down at my feet. How could I tell him when I couldn't even remember anything?

"You can tell me, it's ok. I would never tell anybody about any of this. You can trust me. I'm your Commander and friend after all, aren't I?" Commander Howlett said softly. What if this backfires on me? I searched his face for any signs of lying, but couldn't find any. "I haven't betrayed you this far and I don't plan on ever betraying you. Do you understand?" he asked me seriously as he looked me in the eye without ever blinking.

"I can't do this Commander! I can't go around knowing that you remember everything from the party and I can't," I explained.

"Sarah, why didn't you find me as soon as you realized this?" he asked as if it was physically hurting him.

"I thought if I had some time to think about it, I might be able to remember. Clearly I was wrong, and now I'm the only thing that people talk about. Commander, please, I need  to remember! Can you help me?" I sobbed. In case you haven't noticed, I cry when I'm stressed and frustrated. Howlett nodded and wiped my tears, letting his hand lingered on my cheek. I closed my eyes and tilted my head into his hand. Commander Howlett's touch felt so comforting. I didn't want the feeling to stop, so I held his hand to my face. I opened my eyes into his and felt such a strong connection.

"You know where to find me. We can meet twice a week after hours and, although it might take some time, we'll work it out together ok?" Commander Howlett said. I smiled weakly and nodded. He put his arm around me and gave me an awkward half-hug. He rubbed my shoulder soothingly and left. I watched him as he walked out the door. As quickly as our meeting had started, it was over. It would be our little secret.