She left.
Despair, all i felt was despair. Darkness all over. My heart felt like broken into millions of pieces as tears of agony started to roll out from my eyes. I, who was strong for the world, who never cried before.... today i felt alone.

I have everyone with me, my beloved family, everyone but still i felt alone because she was not here. She once told me, she would leave when Dad will woke up but never in my worst dreams, i saw it coming true but she was true to her words......she left.

Cladded in a white dress offering prayer that was the first time i saw her. She was looking like an angel and my heart took a deep leap that my stomach churched into weird twists of attraction but that was where, i was wrong. How could i be attracted to a girl whose face is yet to be seen by me, all i saw was her side profile, i never saw her face at that moment.

Irritated at my own emotions, i decided to let go of these unwanted feelings but yet again her melodious voice of anklets proved me wrong. As the seconds passed my heart rate accelerated to her anklet's beats and that was when i saw her. Beautiful would be an underestimate word to describe her beauty!

Her long hairs were neatly pulled up in a low bun with some naughty strands dangling against her naturally flushed cheek, her long eyelashes were fluttering in shyness whereas her inviting cherry plumps were slightly parted from the shock of bumping into me. She was the most beautiful woman i had ever laid my eyes on. She was simply stunning.

But fear crept into my heart thinking what if she is his daughter and my fear do came alive. She was his daughter! The man i thought is responsible for my dad's condition but i was wrong, wrong all over. The culprit was from my family,
Although i never took them seriously as my family but still we had same blood. I was so confused and lost in the phenomenon of my revenge that i was hurting her beyond repair. I was hurting her with my harsh words and my actions.

I was lost in my thoughts sitting on the floor by the bed when i slightly gasped as Mom stroked my hairs lovingly sitting beside me on the floor "Mom.......She left" i mumbled slowly and my voice came out hoarse from the crying. Uncontrollable tears started to roll out of my eyes as i placed my head in her lap "Mom i am sorry. Please.....just call her. I want her here by my side. This room is giving me chills without her here. I don't want to live without her. Please mom call her. Just let me talk to her for once. She is not picking up my calls and you all are not letting me to know her whereabouts. Why don't you all understand i need her, i......."

I trailed off as Mom hugged me in her secure embrace "I understand you Bunny but we should understand her too right"? I kept quiet at her words because i know Mom is right. I never tried to understand her feelings, emotions, i never actually tried to understand her. She left me because of my stupidity. I am stupid, an complete idiot at that.

**********

Night was at it's peak, cold wind was blowing against my warm body but my eyes were stuck at the darkness beyond the vast sky as i was staring into nothingness.

"It's 3 O'clock, soon it's going to be Fajr time" I turned my face as i saw Ramish coming towards me. I was sitting in the terrace waiting for God knows what but my sleep was gone the day she left. It's been 2 weeks now.

I slightly shooked my head to come out of my thoughts and asked Ramish who sat on the chair beside me "So"? He arched an eyebrow at me before replying a bit sarcastically "So, you do realize that you are looking like a ghost sitting here all alone in middle of the night"? I nodded my head and turned my attention towards the black sky again.

He sighed as he softly voiced out "She is Okay Zaroon. Please try to come out of your stupor like state" I again nodded my head as i mumbled slowly "I know" Everyone knows about her whereabouts except me and now that i think about it, i deserve this. I deserve to stay alone as she deserves someone better than me but just thinking about her with someone else, This lone thought wants me to destroy this world.

If not her than not this world too!

"Here" Ramish offered me a cigar but i only eyed it for a milli second before shooking my head negatively. Ramish was thoroughly surprised because he knew my love for cigars, expensive one at that "Zaroon it's your favourite" Ramish tried again but all i uttered was.

"She hates it"

*********

As i was done with my 'Esha prayer', i heard a knock "Come in" i faintly muttered and started to fold my prayer mat. Zimal came with 2 cups of coffee. She passed me a smile and gestured me towards the terrace.

I sighed and followed her there. As we settled down on the chair, she handed me my cup "What did you ask for"? She asked politely and i arched my one eyebrow at her question "Dumbo i am asking about your prayer. What did you ask for in your prayer"?

"You are right i am a dumbo" I mumbled and gazed down at my black coffee. As black as my life!
"Ughh! I want my brother back right now!" I kept quiet at this and took a sip from the cup "Okay forget it, back to the question. What did you ask for in your prayer"?

I softly craned my neck to look at her and she was looking at me with expectancy "Rooh!" I smiled sadly as i uttered her name. All i think is about her, all i ask about from Allah is her, my each and everything leads to her.

Zimal slightly frowned as she asked "But she is already yours" I smiled as i replied "Only with name.........But i want her with her heart too and this time i will Insha'Allah «Allah's will»"

"What are you waiting for Zaroon? It's been 6 months already. Go look for her. Your one word and Ruhi's whereabouts will be in your hands. I know Mom forbid you to look for her but still....." She trailed off as i looked down at my lap. 6 months! It's been six months, i last saw my Rooh.

"I trust Mom, if she forbid me than there must be a reason to it and i deserve this punishment Zimal. I don't deserve Rooh but i am really selfish Zimal, i am very selfish, i ask only for her in my prayers. I want her and in near future i will Insha'Allah" I assured her with a smile.

"You wouldn't know about her just by sitting here. At least try to look for her. I can tell you about her whereabouts" She was totally pissed off as she semi yelled at my face.

"I know you all talk to her daily right but i don't need you to tell me anything. When the time will come, i will automatically know about her.........By the way i am leaving for USA tomorrow" At my last words, her eyes sparkled like a star and i frowned in confusion.

"What"? I asked and she just shooked her head smiling like a fool. She stood up and bidding me goodnight she walked away happily. She is going mad!

**********

I sighed as i placed my coat on the stand and sat on the sofa closing my eyes. Her beautiful face flashed across my eyes and my lips automatically curled into a smile.

I really miss her, i miss her alot. Her shy smile whenever i teased her, her soft voice, her melodious anklets, her embarrassed look as she pursed her lips in a thin line, her petite waist which seemed too perfect in my arms. I miss each and everything about her.

This room feels like haunted to me without her. Although this was my room in USA where she never came before but still i imagine her everywhere. I sighed again and opened my eyes to see the red rose in the glass bottle. She loved red roses. I daily place a red rose in the glass bottle but she is nowhere to see this. How i wish to revert back the time.

Her image of rolling her knuckles early in the morning as she wakes up is something which i still relishes with my heart. I crazily do. I can't tell you that how her this little but innocent action turned me on. She was quite the temptress, so damn erotically calm yet the reason of electric current of desire for me.

Kissing her softest plumps is still a refreshed memory that how her perfect cherry lips molded perfectly with mine. At that time, i thought maybe i am lusting over her beautiful and stunning appearance but i was wrong because now i think back to that moment, i realized i cherished each and every moment with her.

I always thought that i am lusting over her but now i understood, lust is not cherished but love is. Love leaves you to cherish even the smallest things about your partner and desiring your partner is not wrong at all. I was mistaking desire with lust which was actually love.

I really love her.