"Hijo? Is everything alright?", she asked alarmed seeing his startled eyes.

Lance glanced out the window and shook his head distractedly, "I got to go Mamí. I'll be back in a bit.", he said hurriedly rushing out of the kitchen.

"Lance! LANCE!! What's wrong?", his mother called distressed grabbing his arm in the hallway, running after him, "You were just enjoying yourself!"

He turned to her, letting his fear show clear on his face without any attempt to hide it, "I don't know... but I need to go. RIGHT NOW. I can't stay here Mamí!!", he said pulling out of her grip, "I'll be back before gift openings I promise.", he bade kissing her on the wrinkled cheek quickly.

His shoes clacked against the smooth expensive dark wood as he heard laughter echo behind him and opened the door to swiftly falling snow.

Snippets of music wafted over to his ears before he stepped outside, songs of good cheer and family giving him a sick sense of irony.

After zipping up his coat, shoving the beanie on his head and pulling the scarf tighter around his neck in the freezing air, Lance shut the door to the house leaving behind the warmth and sweet smells.

He immediately ran through the snow to his red truck, opening the door and climbing inside as his heart beat fast from fear and worry. Starting the ignition and backing out of the crowded driveway as quickly as he could, Lance started the wipers and made his way down the mountain.

As he drove through the challenging cold and dark road, his eyes darted over the dark trees for a sign of trouble.

He just knew... had an awful feeling that something horrible had just happened. Was maybe still happening right now!!
His stomach churned and twisted into horrible knots as anxiety bubbled inside him, making him jittery horrible feeling and giving him trouble holding onto the wheel without shaking violently.

He felt guilty letting his mother read him so easily, making her worry about him and possibly whoever was in trouble, but he knew he had to let her know in order to let him go. She wouldn't have let him leave for anything less then what he had shown, knowing he was still uneasy around his own family still from his mental issues.

And those said issues were only making him panic more, even though calm weather surrounded him and peaceful evergreen trees in a beautiful forest. But to him right now, the woods seemed to be his worst enemy, ready to spring out and attack him as his mind flashed to ambushes from the days of Voltron.

Anything could hide in there. In the dark and ready to fight.

He shook, his chest hurting from the shakiness and emotions trapped in there as he forced himself to focus on the road.

His mind wouldn't let him concentrate though. Blood filled his vision, bright red and violent as he watched screaming and contorted faces of pain of the lives he had taken. Gunshots rang through his ears as he saw the aliens through the lens and pulled the trigger of his sniper. The shock. The last breath that exhaled as they dropped from the power of the bullet. The screams and the deadly accuracy he always delivered when they fell to his blows.

Trembling, Lance barely managed to pull himself out of his dark flashback to avoid going off the side of the cliff as he swerved harshly to the left.

"OH SHIT!!!", he yelled as he slammed his foot on the breaks and shaking his head to snap him out of it.

The car screeched in protest as it was yanked around, the wheels losing grip on the icy and snowy road.
The truck scraped against the mountainside as it ran along the opposite side, making the headlights flicker as Lance tried to gain control again.

After another scary minute of controlled swerving, the truck was under his control again and came to a stop after he had gotten it to drive straight.

Breathing hard as he pushed his short hair back and taking off his hat, Lance leaned back and stared at the navy blue sky and bright full moon.

He almost died. Could've... all because of his stupid PTSD.
Cursing under his breath, he did his breathing exercise routine and put a hand over his chest, feeling it rise and fall as the vibrations of his heart was felt with shaking fingers.

He couldn't let that happen again. Not only was that a danger to himself, but to anyone else if they had been driving on the road with him. Sitting up and looking out the window, Lance looked at the hood and side of the vehicle to see how much damage it had taken.

From what he immediately observed, the truck hadn't taken on too much injury, the worst an ugly giant scuff off the slightly dented left fender and a flickering headlight.

He sighed and sat back against the polyester seat, breathing in relief at knowing he didn't just completely destroy his just paid off car.

His gut then churned again, reminding him why he was out here in the dark, risking his safety when he knew it was dangerous enough without his random flashbacks.

"Alright, you got this Lance. Just stay calm... stay calm.", he told himself as his heart threatened to beat out of control again, "You'll find whoever it is if you just stay calm."

Straightening up and shifting the gear to drive, Lance's hands froze as his eyes caught tire tracks veering into the trees off the side of the road.

His heart started beating louder as he stared at them dumbly for a minute before he threw open his car door and ran over to the edge to get a closer look as the safety belt reminder protested.

Fortunately, the drop off the side into the woods was only four feet down, and the tracks continued into the tall dark trees before disappearing from the headlight's view.
It was still worrying, but at least there wasn't a devastating wreck and a forty foot drop off the mountainside.

Lance hurried back over to the truck after looking at the scene and turned it off after locking the breaks. Taking his keys and an emergency med-kit, he shut the door and jogged down to the woods below.

Again beating himself up internally over not getting a phone after he had isolated himself, now having no way to call for emergency backup or help, Lance took the flashlight out of the med-kit and followed the tracks on his own in the cold.

He heard his heart get decidedly louder as he was left in the semi-dark armed with nothing but his own fists as he made his way into the trees. But he was also filled with a sense of purpose. Someone needed him.
Whoever was in trouble was probably unconscious and couldn't call for help, which Lance couldn't do either, but at the very least he could give them some medical attention and make sure they didn't die from the car fumes or cold. He'd be making a difference again in someone's life...

If he found them of course... and only if in time.

Shadows loomed over him threateningly as the wind blew, making the dry branches of trees and bushes scrape against one another. Not an animal was in sight in the snow and evergreens as he trekked through the thick snow.
Everything felt empty and abandoned... a stark contrast to the warm, vibrant life filled home he had been in only half an hour ago.

Lance's instinct then flared, making him turn out the flashlight as he made his way through another clump of trees and past a crushed log.

He creeped forward, staying low to the ground as he rounded the corner in a defensive posture.

The car that had gone off the road was now visible, its headlights on as it's silhouette stood out against the snow along with two smaller ones.
Which seemed to be people?? Were they fighting? Helping each other...?

Before he could make anything else out the lights went out, making him go blind for a minute and causing his ears to instinctively reach out for clues.

Grunting was heard and heavy breathing, along with mumbled unheard words from what sounded like an adult male.
A slam was then heard as something soft but solid hit the metal of the car before a muffled cry of pain.

Whatever he was hearing sounded like trouble... and it was killing Lance that his eyes were taking those precious seconds to adjust.
Should he turn the light back on?? Startle the intruder? Or should he come up behind in the cover of darkness and use the element of surprise??

He had to make a decision now as his eyes could see the different layered shadows and finally somewhat see the people's heads.

"G-Get the FUCK OFF-F of M-ME!!", an angry male voice whisper-yelled out in a strangled way.

A robbery? Murderer?! His heart kept up to his throat now as the voice sounded familiar.

Oh god....

A glint of sharp metal was then thrown to the ground, a knife laying on the snow beside the truck as the two bodies tussled.

He looked back up alarmed and rushed over, staying close to the cover of trees as he decided to surprise the attacker from behind.
To his dismay he now could make out the bodies, both clearly male, one shoved against the side of the car and the other pinning him back.

The victim was fighting back as much as he could, but he was in a chokehold and both of his wrists were held back above his head.

Lance crept up closer, hand and flashlight ready to knock out the other man in the neck, who's back was to him as he kneed the other male in the gut cruelly.

The raven haired guy grunted in pain as he gasped for more breath as it was taken out of him, his eyes full of angry fire and pain.

The taller male tightened his hold on his wrists, "Wanna try that again Charming?? Don't make me hurt you more then necessary.", he told him.

"F-Fuck off B-BITCH...", he choked out, "I don't w-want a bast-st-ard like y-you fr-fricking me..."

That was when Lance hit him with every bit of force he could muster, driving the handle of the flashlight into the man's strong neck as he was finally close enough.

If he hadn't moved just then, the raven haired guy would've probably gotten his wrists broken.
Fortunately he had made the attacker let go of the other male, on the downside though he was still conscious and angry as he dropped to the ground on one knee and reared around to look at Lance.

"Quiznack.", he said as he brandished the flashlight again.

The taller man was not intimidated at all as it came down, grabbing it mid swing and throwing it into the dead bushes. "You think it's funny huh? Trying to break my neck?", he said getting back up from his fallen position.

Lance backed up a little, trying to search for another form of defense, "I wasn't trying to break your neck! You were assaulting someone and that's against the law!!", he yelled, "I was only doing what needed to be done."

He cracked his knuckles, "Well you're not the police, so it isn't your business and I'm also not letting you tattle. So how about I break your neck and see how you like it.", he threatened coming forward, "You should've just stayed home for Christmas."

His stomach churned as he stared down the strong man in front of him, who was clearly built from good training, who was most possibly insane if he was molesting people on the holidays like some sick disgusting creep.

"If you stand down now, things can come peacefully. You don't have to start a fight that will shed blood.", he told the male in front of him, "But I'm still going to have to turn you in. You attempted something horrible that infringed on his personal rights."

"Coward's talk.", he jeered pinning him against a tree roughly in one lightning quick motion, "But since we're doing this, how about I offer you something. I knock you out instead of killing you and you let me finish what I was doing without interruption. By then I get what I want and you can take yourself and Charming's sad ass to the police station but you won't find anything on me. Win, win for the holiday spirit."

He struggled against the man's rough hold, "I would never accept that deal. Let me go and turn yourself over now."

"I just gave you the chance to live. And I meant it... do you really want to sacrifice yourself when I'll get my way anyway?", he asked throwing him to the ground with a kick to the stomach.

Lance felt the air fly out of him as he curled up into a ball from the pain.

"Huh? You REALLY wanna do that?", he jeered kicking him again as he picked him up by his jacket.

He tried to punch the horrible jerk in the face in answer, but his fist was caught without trouble, being squeezed painfully as the man smirked.

"YES. I want to and WILL fight for others from people like you!!!", he said defiantly, "And I won't EVER STOP DOING THE RIGHT THING!!" Then without warning he kicked his attacker in the groin, making him double over in pain.

Free now from his grasp, Lance punched him up the jaw and nose in two swift motions before delivering another kick to same sensitive spot. The male groaned and curled up like Lance had done, a hurting ball on the ground as he smacked a branch over his head to knock him unconscious.

Lance cringed a little feeling bad for a second before moving on quickly, hoping that the blows would keep the psychotic male down and not kill him in the process.
Justice would always be waiting for him at court...

After standing over him for a moment making sure he didn't move again, he dropped the branch and ran over to the dark haired male who was weakly leaning against the vehicle.

Bruises lined his arms and neck, his face covered with his long hair as he clutched his left arm.

"Oh my gosh are you okay?? Stupid question... of course you're not.", Lance gushed out dropping to his knees in the snow, "What's broken? Are you bleeding?? Shit... you are...." He trailed off looking at the drops of blood on the snow around him and pulled the small case out of his jacket, "I need to stop the bleeding, let me see your arm."

"Lance...", the male's familiar voice finally got in, Lance just realizing he had repeated it several times.

He looked up at him instead of the bleeding arm and felt himself get angry, sad and joyful, "..Keith?", he asked shakily.

Lance then swept Keith's raven hair aside with gentle fingers, staring at the greyish vivid purple eyes in despair.

"Oh god Keith... why did you have to find yourself in a situation like this??", he whispered brokenly noticing the harsh marks on his swollen lip and neck left by the man's selfish lust. "HOW COULD YOU LET THIS HAPPEN YOU IDIOT?!", he exploded grabbing his face and caressing it, "JUST LOOK AT YOURSELF!!"

Keith looked at him surprised, "I-It wasn't m-my idea, you know that. Why are you mad at me?!"

He just glared at him and let go of his face, grabbing his injured arm and wrapping it in the gauze, "It was your idea that you decided to go off road for some reason!! And why couldn't you just teleport and take Cosmo over here instead of driving like some stupid dumbass?"

"Cosmo is m-mati-ing right now...", he replied annoyed, his voice still stuttering as he shook from the cold, "Taking a car is what people normally use L-Lance... I didn't mean to drive off the road but one of my t-tires went flat and I was barely able to keep i-it under control."

He looked back at Keith, "So you drove it into the woods?!?"

"Again, not my idea!! I'm alive aren't I?"

"You're only alive because of me...", he shot back saltily as he held back his tears, "He would've killed you after he did what he wanted."

"He sneaked up on me while I ch-changing the t-tire okay? He punched me in the gut and slammed me into my own vehicle before I knew what was happening. I fought back, but he took my own knife and sliced m-my arm, after that it became a losing battle 'cause he simply had more muscle and brute force...", he said through gritted teeth.

Lance held his arm up more to the moonlight to assess the damage as he continued to wrap it, "Are you alright though? How much did he do to you?", he asked trying to keep his voice steady as he finished off the gauze, "Do you need to go to a hospital? Be honest Keith."

"The cut isn't that deep, once we get out of here I can deal with it myself.", Keith said stubbornly pulling away from his hold.

"I'm only trying to help."

The raven haired man looked away from him, "I k-know... sorry. I'm just pissed off that I let that bitch overpower me and I couldn't drive the damned car to the party without this crap."

He then stood up slowly and painfully, holding a hand over his stomach before he turned away violently and threw up.

Lance stood up after him and put a hand on his back, trying to make sure he didn't collapse. "Keith, we should go to my truck. Yours looks pretty beat up from the crash course it just went through and mine is functioning. When you're ready I'll help you walk over there."

Keith didn't answer as he finished, looking tired and annoyed. Opening the door to the battered vehicle, he reached in and grabbed a bag and slung it over his shoulder before turning back to Lance, "Ready.", he grunted.

Lance went over and supported his friend, letting him lean most of his weight on him as they walked away from the car and the still body, "Take it easy, we don't have to rush.", he told him, "Also why aren't you wearing a jacket?? It's no wonder you're freezing!"

"L-Lost it back when I was attacked... he threw it off..", he muttered as he tried to stand more on his own without his help, "Its fine."

Keith was shaking and Lance wasn't putting up with it. After a few more steps, Lance let go of him and took off his jacket, forcing it onto his ice-cold arms, "Take this. It's only like eight or ten more minutes to the road but if you don't get warm you'll die before we get there.", he said briskly as Keith tried to fend him off.

"No, L-Lance. You need it.", he protested trying to give it back.

He slapped his hands off the jacket and wrapped Keith's arm around his neck again, "I'll live. Now please shut up and just focus on walking Mullet."

Keith mumbled something under his breath but didn't argue, continuing to walk out of the tall forest surrounding them slowly.

Pushing his way through the snow, Lance knew at the pace he was going with Keith, getting back to the truck would take twice as long as it had before. Which wasn't good for either of them in this temperature and cold wind and falling snow.

He was half tempted to ask if he could carry Keith instead, but knowing that would result in wasted time arguing, he opted to continue forward.

"LANCE!! GET DOWN!!", Keith yelled pushing down his head roughly as a tire flew over their heads.

Heart beating fast as he heard it whiz over their heads and crash into the tree with a loud thud, Lance whirled around to see what the heck just happened.
Right behind them, looking very angry and dazed, the muscled man came up on them from behind brandishing a knife and another tire under his arm.

Lance could feel the hate coming off the man as he stormed over and saw the murderous intent gleaming in his eyes.

Heart dropping down to his stomach, he helped pull Keith back up and tried to run from the maniac. "Keith, we gotta run. You can't fight like this and you have got to run.", he said urgently pulling him along, "We need to move.", he demanded trying not to let panic get into his voice. Staying calm was key. Keith was no baby, but he was injured and just put under a lot of stress from that horrible man; staying in control of his voice and direct orders would benefit them both instead of panicked yells.

"I can't run like that yet...", he breathed painfully as he tried to keep up, "We've got to fight him.", Keith said desperately.

"Fight...?! Are you-? NO! Just no Keith!!", he said angrily pulling him forward more as the man got closer, only 10 feet away, "You'll die if you try to do anything like that."

The other tire was then suddenly thrown at them, this time slamming into Lance's back as the two tried to dodge it.

Keith and Lance toppled over, separated as the man advanced on them and snatched Keith, "I don't appreciate you running off before I said I was done. You're going to have to pay for that with more pain.", he threatened shoving him into the tall evergreen, "Being pretty is no excuse to be cowardly."

"LET ME GO YOU SON OF A BITCH!!", Keith yelled trying to pry himself free, "FUCK OFF!!"

Lance got up as quickly as he could, his back screaming in pain, running over and slamming into the bigger man with all his weight.

As they both fell over, Keith grabbed the knife that the man had dropped, slashing his knee and slicing his arm as Lance punched the brute's jaw.

"STAY. OFF. KEITH. YOU. ASSHOLE!!", Lance yelled angrily beating up the man with every word.

Their attacker took the hits and fended the rest of them off, grabbing his fists and throwing him into the snow.

Keith then rushed over, slashing the knife at him and cornering the man with the knife to his throat, "Listen here.", he said dangerously, "One wrong move and I'll slit your neck bitch. I'm done with you, you hear?! Done.", he breathed.

The man stood stock still, barely breathing as the point of metal glinted at his thick neck.

"Lance, get over here and knock him out with something quick. Use the rock over there.", Keith ordered still staring intently at the muscled male with the knife held threateningly toward him.

Lance nodded and got back up to his feet, his breathing heavy from the fight.
He then spotted the rock immediately and scrambled over to it, picking it up and running over the two to knock the guy out.

"Sorry, but your dangerous and I need you to actually stay down.", Keith said, sweat shining on his forehead even though it was freezing, "Hopefully you'll wake up, and if you don't... and if you don't.., well that's my fault."

The man glared down at him and snatched Keith's right hand, throwing him into Lance and pulling the knife out of his grip.

"This is ALL YOUR FAULT.", the man breathed angrily at Lance as he helped Keith, "THIS IS ALL YOUR FUCKING FAULT!!", he roared, hate and rage controlling him completely as he came down on him.

The silver metal rang through the air as he held his breath and expected the devastating hit; only to see scarlet blood fly and stain his vision as a scream tore through the air not coming out of him.

Heart beating fast, Lance stared at the body in the snow on top of him, the knife protruding from Keith's heaving chest.

Blood stained his hands as he touched his friend's chest in a trance, quiet numbing shock seizing him as he stared wide eyed at the injury.
It was like a nightmare come to life... the blood, the scream...

His heart beat got louder and louder till rage finally snapped him out of his horror, tears coming into his eyes as he glared up at the evil male in front of him.

Grabbing the man's wrist as he tore the blade out of his victim to plunge it into Lance himself, Lance grabbed the bloody blade, flew up and attacked the killer and tore it through the man's neck. It all happened so fast the man wasn't able to scream as more bright red blood splattered against Lance's face, feeding the visions of war and trauma in his mind's eye.
All he saw was him defending Keith. Stopping the horrible being from inflicting even more damage as he delivered the final blow. He didn't see or feel the cold or the knife in his hand. All he felt was numb rage as he drove the knife through his enemy's windpipe one final time before snapping back to reality.

Horrible cold washed over him as he looked at the body under him, blood everywhere as Lance dropped the knife and screamed.
He looked at the damage done and his bloodied hands and arms, screaming in sorrow, horror and pain as he wept and knelt beside Keith.

What had he done? What had he done? What HAD HE DONE?!

With trembling arms, Lance felt for his heartbeat and pulse as he gathered the pale dying man in his arms, "Keith... KEITH!!", he cried out, "Answer me please!"

With great effort Keith opened his eyes and looked at him, "A-Are... are you okay?", he coughed out, his chest quaking as red came up from his mouth.

He stared at him, "You're dying and all you can think about is if I'm okay?! Why did you do it? Why did you sacrifice yourself for me?! YOU'RE GOING TO DIE NOW KEITH!! Do you realize THAT?! I CANT LOSE YOU!", he sobbed cradling his head in his lap, "I can't lose you... I just can't."

"I c-couldn't let... couldn't let you die either...", Keith whispered. His pale face stood out against the white snow, his eyes shining with some untold spark as he tried to hide the pain, "I'll be f-fine... you'll make it..."

"I can't make it without Keith!! I... I..", Lance struggled trying to find the words that lay within his heart.

Keith grabbed his hand weakly, holding it tightly as he smiled, "I need you... I need you to l-live Lance. Whether it's with me or w-without me."

He swallowed looking down at the man in his arms, guilt weighing on his heart. He hasn't done a good enough job. Hadn't protected him like he should've. This was all his fault.
All his fault.

Gripping the warm comforting hand back, he stared into his eyes, "I don't want to live without you Keith. I need to talk to you, laugh and joke with you... you've made me strong enough to come back to my own family!! I wouldn't have been if you had never visited me back on the farm...
You've given me life Keith; you're my soul, my heart, my everything. Please, please don't leave me.", he cried as the man's face grew surprised and then happy, "I NEED YOU."

One strangled breath later, Keith's eyes went dark as he looked like he was about to respond, leaving a still and dead body in Lance's arms.
His hand then went limp, dropping lifelessly beside him as Lance dropped it in shock and stared at Keith in devastation.

"I love you... I was just about to say I love you..", he whispered, touching his forehead to Keith's.
Tears poured out as the cold breeze blew around them both, quiet and ugly silence filling the air.

"GOD KEITH, COME BACK!!", he suddenly screamed into the night feeling himself start to go mad with grief, "IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!! It should've been me, me, me...!!"

He clutched Keith's chest and sobbed on him, noticing the empty void of the heart's beat and blood that should've never been spilt.

"I-It should've been me... not you. Never you...", he said brokenly as he continued to cry.

The impact that Keith had put on him and his life ran through his mind as he clung helplessly onto him.
The minute after the celebration of the victory of Atlas, the family get togethers, Shiro and Curtis' wedding, and the paladins spending some final time together before going their separate ways and watching the lions disappear into the great beyond of space; Lance had taken Cultanecker and the single Altean plumberry blossom over the states to Cuba and purchased a small property of farmland without saying anything to anyone.
He had settled there without any intention of connecting with anyone except his cow and the exotic plants he cultured. His neighbor, an old man named Frank, had seen he needed time alone and given him his space, sending a customer or two to him to help Lance out when he needed to pay taxes.

Reality had been cruel to him as soon as the celebrations had passed, leaving his mind to wander into dark places without him meaning to.
That's when the dreams, visions and flashbacks attacked him, drowning him in blood whenever he thought about his family or lost friends in battle. It was abrupt and living hell for him.
Getting away from civilization was all he could think of to try to escape and get better, and showers upon showers were another pointless escape as his shampoo bottles seemed to look at him accusingly.

He couldn't escape no matter what he did. And anxiety piled up higher and higher as he cut his hair compulsorily and he felt some small control in his life on his small farm with his simple life. He had everything he needed it seemed, no guilt of expectations, a purpose for others without stressing himself out and a calm quiet place to try to reflect on positive things.

After about a couple of months alone, Keith had found him with Cosmo by his side. He didn't ask any questions and talked to him about how tough leading the Blade of Marmora was and asked if he knew how to make a good milkshake.
Lance smiled to himself sadly remembering how he had asked him about being lactose intolerant, which Keith only said he could take it like the big idiot he was.
After that he came almost every other month to visit, talking to him and sometimes just stopping by with a helpful gift like a new rake or sprinkler system.

Lance never talked about how he was all alone until he broke down one night, Keith walking into the room seeing him on the floor holding a picture of the group in front of the Allura memorial. Keith had immediately comforted him and in response, Lance gushed out his problems to the concerned half alien who smelled strangely sweet of leather and wood.
They had gotten close and told each other their problems after that one night, both of them giving support as he recovered slowly from the pain he had suffered and felt for so long. They had forged a strong relationship, even if they didn't see each other for a couple of months at a time. Keith had accepted Lance as he was without question and had always offered a hand right before he left for another long trip to space.

Keith had saved him... saved him from himself and his darkest fears without even trying; giving him the strength to fight on the days he wanted so badly to give up and join Allura.
He couldn't let that go unthanked... to have Keith leave him before he was told how important he was to him and the spark he had reignited.

Lance cradled him close, his own body shaking not from the frigid air but the sorrow and regret coursing through him.

He had loved Keith... probably had for a long time as his relationship with Allura became frayed at the end as her heart was clearly still with Lotor. Lance knew he loved her with all his heart and was willing to do anything for her... but the connection he had with Keith..
It was something he would've never expected.

He had been afraid to admit he wanted something romantic. Not only was Keith not a girl, but Keith was also his rival. Lance thought he only liked girls... should only like girls.
But he had grown, and so when his heart started to lean towards him, he finally let himself think about the possibility more.

Lance had never known if Keith felt the same and telling him that he had feelings for him could ruin everything they had built in that reclusive farm. He wasn't willing to risk that... not until tonight.
This horrible night where Keith had been ripped away from him.

He would've given anything to undo everything that had just happened. To have Keith back alive in his arms so he could just admit he remembered the 'bonding moment' Keith was obsessed with and confess his love.

"I'm so sorry Keith... I'm so sorry...", he cried quietly, "I needed you, still need you... and I let you die. I want you back. I need you back."

His stomach felt like it was disintegrating from the awful pit of despair he had fallen into. How could he live without Keith?? Especially after this?! It was almost too much for him as he thought about really just giving up on himself. What reason did he have to stay when the one person that helped him live was gone now?

Amal's face then came into his mind along with Rachel, Veronica, Josh and his whole family one by one. They loved him and would be devastated if he disappeared on them again. He couldn't do that to them.

And Lance could practically hear Keith scolding him for thinking that he should just end himself, and afterword giving him a pep talk.
Another sad smile went on his face before he curled up close to his body.

Lance then saw a soft blue glow from the corner of his eye, or more precisely from the corners of his eyes...

Touching his upper cheek gently, he could tell and feel he had the power of Altea, of Allura radiating through it. His soul felt like it was glowing as he knew with dead certainty what he had to do.

"Please... Allura, help me. Help me save him...", he pleaded pressing his hands to Keith's bloody chest and ripped shirt, "I love him..."

He watched in relief and awe as his hands started glowing with the same soft glowing light as his markings, balls of light floating up and forming a vague shape. As more popped up they arranged themself into Allura, who was resting her hands in the same place as Lance on the opposite side.

He stared at her, more tears coming into his eyes then he thought possible seeing his deceased girlfriend.
The ghost of the princess smiled back at him and nodded, her lips forming the words 'goodbye'.
As she did, she glowed brighter and his markings did also, flowing into Keith and mending his wounds, bruises and abuse from the assault as if it never happened.

"Wait... Allura...", Lance called reaching out to the last floating sparks as everything faded away now, leaving him in the dark, "I wanted to thank you..." Seeing she was gone forever this time, his heart knowing this unexplainably, he turned back to Keith and put his ear to his heart with a shaky breath.

The heartbeat rang through his ears in startling relief, making him burst into joyful and hopeful sobs as he clutched Keith to him tightly as he rocked back and forth.

"Lance. Lance, I love you so much.", Keith said looking up at him with a weak smile, "Have loved you for years. That's why I did it. That's why I gave up my life for you.", he grasped his face in his strong hands.

He swallowed as he put a hand upon Keith's, "I love you too... I'm so sorry that it took so long for me to tell you. I'm sorry you died because of me.", he sobbed.

Keith sat up on his own, still holding onto his face as he stared into Lance's eyes, "Don't be sorry. Don't. It's alright, I promise. All that matters is you're okay."

"You're not even going to ask how you're alive? How I found you in the first place or how I'm such a screw-up? How can you only be so concerned about me instead of yourself for once?!", he cried out, "I failed to save you in time!! It's a literal miracle that you're here alive with me!!"
Lance then wiped the blood specks off Keith's cheek, his heart in his throat as he held onto him tightly, afraid to let go, "You have no idea how much you mean to me... no idea. You saved me."

"And you have no idea how much I love you McClain. Everything else, every other worry or fear doesn't matter when I got you here with me.", he said quietly edging forward, "... Let me be there for you."

"Can... can I kiss you? Is, is that okay?", Lance exploded out grabbing both of his cheeks and drawing him in, their foreheads pressed together.

Keith closed his eyes and leant forward in answer, pressing his lips against Lance's as he caressed his cheek gently.

Tears ran down Lance's face in silent rivers as he brought Keith closer to him, tightening his grip on their heads as he ran his other hand through his long dark hair.

The two kissed gently at first before deepening it, both now letting the other know how much they loved each other after so many years of it being left unsaid.
After several magical warm minutes, they broke apart and stared into each other's eyes and held hands as they sat in the snow.

"I love you...", he said his voice trembling from joy.

Keith ran a hand over his earlobe gently, "I do too... so much.", he replied bringing him in for another kiss.

"Keith, we need to get you in the car.", Lance half-laughed standing up, "If you don't, you're going to freeze. I might freeze... I love kissing you but lets get in the car first.", he said rubbing his arms.

Lance watched as Keith shook his head and sighed, "Fine, you've got a good point.", he pushed himself off the ground and looked at the dead body of the tall muscled man.
Looking down at his chest and the blood everywhere that was being steadily covered by the snow, he looked back at him wistfully, "So... I really did die huh?"

He looked away for a moment before looking back at the bloodied torn shirt on Keith's chest, "Yeah, you did... that.. person.. he gave me no choice. He killed you and was about to do the same to me. I'm sorry."

Keith patted him on the back, "You did what you had to do to survive. Besides, I think he has a criminal record of assaulting other people in the past... he would've gotten a heavy price anyhow.", he comforted, "Don't let his choices haunt you... he was crazy Lance."

"I think I went crazy for a minute back there though...", he muttered staring at the encrusted blood over his arms, "I just started hacking..."

He then felt warm arms wrap around him in a gentle yet firm huh, "You've been through a lot okay? He was awful, a danger to himself and others, and you stopped him. You did the right thing ultimately... Believe me when I say it's going to be fine. It's just like when we had to fight the Galra back then, we can't always spare evil."

He tore his eyes away from the red substance on his body and took a shuddering breath, "It's still a human life."

Keith liked at him and shook his head, "He was barely human. He acted like some fucking wild animal with no self control! Forget him!
I'll go grab my jacket real quick and we can leave this all behind...", he said walking off, now completely healed from Lance's magic.

After a minute he came back, holding his brown leather jacket and the flashlight Lance had lost.

He turned on the beam and threw the jacket onto his shoulders, surprising Lance as he held onto the soft and tough material. It smelled exactly like Keith he realized as he pulled it on... making his cheeks go pink with happiness.

"C'mon, we need to head back to your car.", he said pulling him along, hand in hand finally leaving behind the dark and devastating nightmare.

The contact they shared now was almost overwhelming, but he loved it and treasured every second of it. Obviously Keith didn't need to be told twice that it was okay to have couply affections once they had confessed their love for one another.

After several minutes of walking through the crunchy snow, the woods gave way to the road and mountainside, his red truck gleaming in the moonlight as if it were winking at them.

"Is that it?", Keith asked stopping to look at it.

"No Mullet, it's some random truck, the only truck in fact, that's sitting around at the side of the road for no apparent reason.", he responded, "Of course that's it!", he said pulling out the keys and unlocking the doors as they climbed up the short slope.

"That was highly uncalled for.", Keith said reaching the top, "I was just making sure, damn it."

He rolled his eyes at the handsome man in front of him, "I was just messing around you big baby, now get in already.", he laughed opening the door.

Keith stared at him blankly for a second, "Oh... right. Shit.", he said climbing inside and shutting the door as Lance buckled his seatbelt, "Forgot."

He looked at him for a moment as he started the ignition, "Do you cuss this often all the time? I don't remember it being this bad when you visited me."

"I swear whenever I'm stressed."

"Keith are you okay? Is something still broken? Is it me? You can tell me...", he asked alarmed, his hand holding the gear shift tightly, "Was it that guy back there?"

Lance saw him tense his shoulders as he pulled off the bloody jacket and torn shirt, leaving only his bare chest and giving Lance a near heart attack from seeing it.

"ASFKEITH!! What are you DOING?", he yelped, his face turning bright red as Keith just looked at him.

"Cleaning up the best I can.", he answered calmly taking a wet wipe from the med-kit, "I can't be wearing those stained things into your family's home and plus I still got blood over my body. It's not like you haven't seen me like this before..."

"I guess that makes sense... and I know, I know... but we're in the car!!", he said frazzled now looking very intently at the wheel.

"It's not like I'm naked Lance, and it's just you and me. Even if another car drives by they won't see anything."

Lance pealed Keith's jacket off and threw it back toward him, "Alright point proven, but you can't go in not wearing any tops either.", he blushed.

"Well you should clean up too.", he said as he pulled on the jacket and closed it, "You're covered in the stuff."

He watched as Keith pulled out several more wipes and scrubbed Lance's arms and hands intently, doing his best to clean up the blood from his body.
After he had finished with his arms, he pointed to his sweater, "That's covered in blood, you should take it off.", he said leaning over and tugging on the hem of it pointedly. Lance obliged and was glad he had been smart enough to wear layers unlike his old rival.

Keith looked him over and then scrubbed his face roughly before stopping and poking the place where his markings were, "Lance, where did the Altean markings go?"

"What? What do you mean?!", he asked pulling down the mirror. And to a mixture of sorrow and relief, he saw Keith was right. The blue triangles had disappeared... the last bit of Allura he had now gone with it.
He traced a hand over the missing marks, "Oh... oh... I-I think I understand.", he said slowly, "When I healed you with what little bit of magic Allura gave to me... which showed up in the markings... they disappeared because I used all the magic up. Allura appeared as some ghost and told me goodbye as she helped me save you... and then she faded away. I'm guessing the markings faded off with her because that was how she passed me her gift of healing, even if it was only a one time thing."

"You saw Allura?"

He waved his hand, "Not really... it was more of a fragment of an echo if that makes any sense. She was only there for the last couple of seconds."

Keith's brow furrowed, "Are you Alright? Seeing her again I mean?"

"It was nice... but I'm not sad really. She was happy for me, for both of us... I could tell.", he smiled starting the car down the road as Keith hurriedly clicked in his seatbelt.

Keith nodded understandably as he leaned against the chair quietly, listening to the tires roll against the asphalt.

The two sat in silence for a moment before he broke it, glancing at Keith as he drove back up the mountain, "How about you though? You never answered my question about why you're stressed. Also, an easier question, why don't you have a phone or some alien tech scroll?"

"The phone was destroyed earlier...", he said annoyed crossing his arms looking out the window, "And to answer the first question, I'm just stressed because I'm still pissed off that guy took advantage of me. I, I thought I was better at defending myself.", he said bitterly, "Also I never thought I'd find myself a victim."

"It wasn't your fault Keith... he caught you by surprise. It was dark and cold and a creep was the last thing anyone would expect on Christmas."

"He might've... no would've, been able to do worse things to me if you hadn't shown.", Keith said angrily, "It was... awful."

Lance felt guilty, "I'm sorry I kissed you... I was rushing into it and being completely insensitive.", he apologized feeling stupid for not remembering what Keith had just been through, "I don't know what I was thinking."

"What? No, I wanted that. You even asked me Lance. I'm not fragile now okay!", he said exasperated, "I'm not stressed because of you. I'm just mad I wasn't able to save myself."

"Okay... but Keith, we both know you're one of the strongest and skilled fighters out there, and that you wouldn't sit idly by. You tried your best and getting beat happens to the best of us.", he said quietly, "I learned that lesson for a couple of years... I've been suffering through some bad stuff for a long time... you know that. And what I learned is that it's okay to be weak sometimes. We can't always be strong enough on our own, but we can be if we let others help us. Those weaknesses make us not only human, but help us connect to the people we need to most."

He looked at him, "You've gotten wise sounding... next thing I know you're going to be growing a beard.", he said with a small grin looking thoughtful.

"Pain can make us grow... or it can break us. I've chosen to let myself learn from it, even though my mind half the time tries to paint my world with black instead of white. It took me a long time to start thinking positively again..."

"I'm glad you've gotten better. The last thing I'd want for you is to be hopeless and miserable.", Keith said, "You sound more like the old Lance."

He looked at him for a moment as he continued to climb the steep road, "What do you mean?"

"You were more positive back then... you had more hope for a future and even if our asses got kicked you'd just say we'd get them next time.
You had a lot more life in you and it seemed ever since I left to join the Blades... you kinda deflated. But you seem like that younger bouncier Lance, and I'm happy. I missed that."

Lance swallowed, "Well, again that's because of you..."
Heart beating happily, he finally saw the crowded driveway to his sister's house in view, making him sigh in relief, "This is it. We're here now!", he smiled parking his car after swerving around the others, "We're safe."

Home.
That's what stood in front of them with cheery warmth and trusted friends waiting inside.
Security and support... he felt like he could really breathe again as he looked at the reclusive mountain house with ease instead of anxiety.

"Let's go in, yeah?", he said unbuckling himself and making his way out just as Keith grabbed his hand, stopping him.

"After all we've been through... after how long we loved each other... will you call yourself my boyfriend Lance?", he asked looking up at him, "I want to go in there with you as my own. I want you to be something I can officially say is mine. We've both almost died, saved each other, fought side by side and bonded together for years. So, so will you let me be yours?"

"Oh.", he said softly looking into his face. It was so open and vulnerable again, just like the time had saw Lance after being beat up by the man and as they had kissed.
Keith felt like they known each other good enough to be boyfriends... and Lance felt his heart melt with joy hearing that. "Yeah, of course... I mean, I would like that. I would like that a lot."

Keith smiled at him, making Lance's stomach do strange little flips, "Thank you Lance... there's nothing I wanted more then you."

He felt his face get very hot as he rubbed his very messy curly hair, "I- uhhhh, me too. I mean, I wanted you, not me, to be with! I love you Keith and I wouldn't choose anyone else right now to be with.", he gushed. Pulling away gently from his grip, he motioned to the waiting house, "So, we should probably get in. I forgot I left in a hurry and worried Mamí. She's probably a mess because of me!"

He climbed out of the truck and shut the door as Keith did the same, both walking to the warm smells and laughter that carried through the windows and walls.

Lance then grabbed his new official boyfriend's hand as they arrived at the door, smiling nervously at him as he opened the door.

As soon as he did, his mother, little niece and his siblings rushed over and hugged him. Asking his a thousand questions and checking him for bruises as they then started on Keith.
It was an almost pleasant chaos, the caring and concerned faces of his family surrounding with him genuine love.

"Alright enough!", Keith shouted over the tumult holding his free hand out toward them, "We're fine alright! Pipe down!"

The room instantly became quiet as Shiro came rushing into the room along with Pidge and Hunk.

"Keith!!", Shiro exclaimed rushing over and hugging him and Lance, "Where were you guys? What happened?"

"Was your friend in danger hijo? Is that why you left 'cause he needed help?", his mother asked looking at Keith kindly.

"It's a long story that we don't really want to get into. Keith's car just broke down and I had a feeling he needed me, that's all.", he said over the now chattering voices, not wanting to get into more sensitive details that might give Keith trauma, "It was bumpy, but we are alright... let's just enjoy each other's company."

"Sounds good to me!", Pidge replied reading the hint to let it go, "Now we've got the gang here we can open presents!"

"Sounds good! Sorry I kept you guys waiting.", Lance then squeezed Keith's hand lovingly, hoping whatever stress he still felt could maybe be replaced with good memories and joy, "We can relax now and catch up with you guys."

Pidge smirked at their entwined hands, "So... Klance huh?"

"What?", they both asked at the same time looking confused.

Rachel gestured to their hands, "Klance, you idiots. It's your couple name and they totally bet that you guys were a thing.", she smiled motioning to Pidge, "So, how long have you been together?"

"Our whole life.", Keith replied as Lance said a few minutes.

Hunk passed Pidge twenty dollars as they cheered triumphantly, "I knew it!! HAHAHA I CALLED IT!!"

Shiro laid a hand on both of their shoulders, "I'm happy for you guys, it's about time you found someone special in your life that makes you happy."

He grinned up at his childhood idle, a man he loved and respected, "Thanks Shiro..."

Lance then found himself crushed by Amal, her little monkey arms wrapping around his waist.

Keith looked down at her startled, "Where did she come from?"

"Keith, this Amal. My adorable niece.", he introduced as he held her with his free arm, "She made me a bayard for Christmas.", he said importantly.

"A bayard huh? Neat.", Keith said looking at her curiously.

She giggled and then looked at his boyfriend, "Are you guys going to get married? You seem to love each other a lot."

"No, not yet sweetie.", he laughed hugging her tightly as his face went red again, "For now we're just boyfriends."

"Not yet huh?", Keith said slyly, "Does that mean you want to get married to me? Huh, Lance McClain?"

He heard Amal squeal as Keith got closer to his face, staring at him with those beautiful inhuman eyes, "Well, Yeah... I mean we've practically been together our whole lives. I can see us going that far after a bit.", he said nervously, "You don't?"

"Actually I do. I've seen it for years.", Keith then looked up and his smirk grew bigger, "Mistletoe Lance."

Before he could look up at the white berries overhead, Keith brought his face close to Lance's, the two kissing passionately as everyone oohed and whooped as Amal giggled and covered her eyes, still in Lance's arm.

"Gays! There's a small child present!", Pidge called out after a good minute, "Keep it family friendly!!"

They broke away after a few more sendings as everyone laughed, Lance seeing they had a whole audience watching their kiss. "C'mon guys!! Can anyone get a little privacy here?", he called exasperated.

"Nope!! This a big family Curlyfry!", his cousin laughed taking Amal from his arms, "Everyone is in everyone's business! Congrats on your cowboy boyfriend!", he said slapping his back.

Matt then made party streamers and confetti fall around him and Keith as he exploded the party popper, "CONGRATS YOU GAYS!!", he laughed as Veronica and Axca popped smaller ones.

He facepalmed, throughly embarrassed now, "Alright, thank you but lets just open the presents already!! Stop acting like you've never seen a couple!"

"Now where would be the fun in that?", his uncle called.

Keith leaned toward Lance, his hair falling over his eyes a little, "Is your family usually this crazy?", he whispered smiling.

"Usually they are a lot more.", he replied watching in delight as his boyfriend looked bewildered, "But don't worry, we don't bite.", he laughed dragging him through to crowd to the big living room.

Everyone filed in after them, still poking and making a big deal out of their official relationship good naturally.

"Alright, time for presents!!", his mother announced as they sat down by the fireplace in the love seat, "But before, our toast!" She then held up a glass as Kai and Rachel quickly passed the champagne to everybody and sparkling apple cider to those under age. "To family!! And to the love in this holiday season!", she called.

"To family and love!", everyone echoed as they drank and started laughing and talking.

Keith wrapped an arm around Lance, holding him close as they watched presents get passed, glasses get clinked and people make jokes, "You're my Christmas present Lance,", he said softly kissing his forehead, "and I think maybe this night will hold good memories for me instead of bad."

He looked at him, "You know what, I feel the same. I started out anxious and stressed tonight... but because of you, I feel better. I feel safer.", he smiled, "You make me better Keith. You help me stay in the moment and not get ripped away into the past. I owe everything to you... and I won't ever let you go.", he promised taking his other hand in his, "I love you."

Keith's eyes sparkled with pure joy as he put his forehead against Lance's, "And I owe my life to you... I'll stay you you by your side as long as you want me to. I'm yours..."

Lance pulled him in tightly, embracing the man he loved tightly as he felt Keith bury his face into his neck like a kitten.

"Say you won't ever leave me...", Keith muttered quietly holding onto him, "Please..."

Heart cracking and glowing with love, he squeezed him tighter and kissed his ear, "Of course I won't ever leave you... I will never abandon you Keith. Ever. Know that I'm here for you forever..."

"I-I... I love you Lance. More then I could ever say.", he said coming out of the warm hug and having one hand on the back of Lance's neck and cheek.

He brought Keith closer to him and pulled him in for another kiss after whispering, "You don't have to. I know..."

"Merry Christmas Lance...", Keith said After they ended it and cuddled closer.

Lance rested his head against him, listening to his strong steady heartbeat and feeling happier then he had been for a long time, "Merry Christmas."

***
The End

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Thanks to my sister for inspiring me to write this, my other Voltron stanners and of course, Voltron itself.
❤️💙
-Word count: 19,054
————— important message-
Awareness is important. There are real people who suffer through PTSD, assaults and depression. Anyone can go through it, male, female or anything in between. And people who go through these things on the holidays is especially a struggle.
I hope this story has made you think a little or sympathize, and will help you guys reach out to others in need.
It doesn't have to be the holidays for you to help make a difference. Sometimes all it takes is one kind smile. Thank you for reading this, and may you have a good day.