ENID ANIMAL SHELTER

The Young Man is in an open body bag. Dean and Sam are in their FBI suits.

"Claw marks?" Dean Says

"Yeah. The cops said all the cats went missing." Sam Says As he walk slowly past the kennels.

"Right, so, yesterday, uh, we're dealing with some sort of a snake monster. Today, it's a killer kitty." Dean Says

"I don't know." Sam Says

"Hey." He pauses in front of the German Shepherds kennel. "Why does that mutt look familiar?" Dean Says

Sam reads a chart clipped to the kennel. "That was the taxidermist's dog."

"So, he's been at both crime scenes?" Dean Says

"Yeah." Sam Says

"Maybe he's a suspect. You know may–" He breaks off as an officer walks past "Could be a skinwalker, maybe a shapeshifter." Dean Says

"Doesn't really look like a monster to me." Sam Says
Then Dean holds up a silver dollar.

"One way to find out. Come here, boy. Hey. This isn't gonna hurt at all. Unless it hurts." He rubs the coin behind the ears with the silver dollar, the dog doesn't react. "Hmm." Dean Says

"I guess we can, uh, rule out killer." Sam Says

The Dog barks as the Sheriff walks over to them.

"Do you agents need any further assistance?" He Asks then removes his hat and the dog stops barking.

"Officer, I think we're okay. Thanks." Sam Says

"All right, well, let me know." He Says placing his hat on his head and the dog barks again

"Officer. Excuse me. Uh, can I borrow your hat?" Dean Asks

The Sheriff unquestioningly takes off his hat and gives it to Dean. He puts on the hat and the dog barks. He takes off the hat he's silent, Dean gives the hat back to the Sheriff.

"Good luck getting adopted." The Sheriff leaves the kennels.

"Okay, so, The Colonels not a suspect." Sam Says

"Yeah, but he's a witness..Hey, boy. You speak sign language?" Dean Says

"That's monkeys." Sam Says

"Huh?" Dean Says

"You know what? This is gonna sound crazy." He takes out his phone. "I read this book once about this guy who tried to teach his dog to speak after it witnessed a murder." Sam Says

"It worked?" Dean Asks

"No." Sam Says

"But he wrote a book about it?" Dean Says

"Yeah, well, he doesn't have what we have..Hey Kevin. Hey, it's me. How do we speak to a dog?" Sam Asks

_________________________________

MOTEL ROOM

Sam and Dean are sitting at the table while The Colonel lies on the floor.

"An Inuit spell." Dean Says

"Yeah. Who knew the, uh, Men of Letters had its own Eskimo section." Sam Says

"And it's supposed to let us communicate with The Colonel?" Dean Asks As Sam plucks hair from The Colonel's coat

"Yeah, well... that's the plan." He puts the hair into a bowl and stirs the contents vigorously "Kevin said it's like a sort of a human/animal mind meld."
Sam Says

"Meaning?" Dean Says

"If it works, we should be able to read The Colonel's thoughts." Sam Says pouring the contents of the bowl into a glass.

"All right, I'll do it." He takes the glass "You – you got enough on your plate." Dean Says

"Like what?" Sam Says

"Uh, like... you're tired. You're on the mend. Okay? Plus, you – you've got a sensitive stomach. Last thing we need is you chucking this stuff up. Huh?" Dean Says

Sam scoffs and Dean looks at the red liquid in the glass.

"Doesn't look so bad." He drinks the liquid in one gulp "I was wrong...come on." Sam hands him a book. "Ha!" He reads from the book "Deila hér me. Dag eru nou rar vitur orum." All right. Let's get this party started. Tell me everything you know." The Colonel yawns. "What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?" He laughs, Sam doesn't "Tough crowd."
Dean Says

The Colonel barks and Dean looks at Sam and shakes his head to say that he doesn't understand.
Later Dean and Sam are at the table eating take-out food. Foreigner's "I Want to Know What Love Is" plays.

"So, call Kevin spell tasted like ass and was a bust." Dean Says

"At least it didn't affect your appetite. Geez." Sam Says

"Yeah." Dean Says

The Colonel, who is sitting at Dean's feet looking up at him eating.

"Change the station." Dean looks down at The Colonel. "Change the station." He Says

"What?" Dean Says

"What?" Sam Says

"You – shut up. It's working!" Dean Says

"It – go!" Sam Says

"Say that again." Dean Says

"You call this classic rock? Next thing you know, they'll be playing Styx And Dennis DeYoung? A punk." Colonel Says

"Dennis DeYoung's not a punk. He's Mr. Roboto, bitch." Dean Says

"Why are you arguing with the dog about Styx?" Sam Says

"Wh– uh, yeah. Um, hey, boy. What were you trying to tell us about Cowboy Hat?" Dean Asks

"The douchewheel who killed my best friend was wearing a cowboy hat." Colonel Says

"And the pothead, too?" Dean Asks

"Yep. Same guy killed both." Colonel Says

"Ask about the cats." Sam Says

He throws a rolled-up food wrapper past Dean into a garbage can. Dean casually takes the wrapper out of the garbage can and puts it in front of Sam.

"Yeah, uh –And what about the cats?" Dean Asks

"I don't know." Colonel Says

Sam holds up the food wrapper "I don't want this."

"I couldn't see much. I didn't exactly have the best view in the orphanage. Oh, but I could smell him. Guy reeked of red meat, dishwashing detergent and tiger balm." Colonel Says

"Huh." Dean Says

"So, what's he saying?" Sam Asks

Sam throws the food wrapper towards the garbage can again, missing this time.

"Uh, that the – the guy" he retrieves the food wrapper from the floor and tosses it across the table to Sam "he smelled like ground chuck and soap suds and old-lady cream." Dean Says As Sam holds up the food wrapper.

"Dean, what are you doing?" Sam Asks As Dean scratches behind his ear.

"I don't know." THE Colonel turns his head on the side and laughs. Dean scratches behind his ear again. "Oh, what are you laughing at?" Dean Says

A vehicle pulls up outside The Colonel hears it and so does Sam and Dean. The Colonel barks and Dean stands up, goes to the window and parts the curtains. A Mailman is getting out of the vehicle.

"Hey! Hey, hey! Yeah!" He points at the Mailman "You! You!" The Mailman looks at him, but walks away. The Colonel continues to bark "Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, you! You! You! You!" Dean growls

"Uh, Dean?" Sam Says

"Hmm?" Dean Says

"I think the spell worked. Fact, I think it worked a little too well." Sam Says As Dean sits down at the table again.

"What?" Dean Says

"I think... you might be a dog." Sam Says

Dean continues to scratch behind his ear "What?"

"You're scratching your head. You're... barking at the mailman. You're playing fetch." Sam throws the food wrapper into the garbage can again.

"I –" He looks at the food wrapper, makes a movement towards it and restrains himself. He makes a whimpering noise. "Ruh-roh." Dean Says

A few moments later Sam is on the phone with Kevin, Dean is sitting on the end of a bed, staring at The Colonel, who is looking back at him..

"Yeah. No, that – okay all right thanks." He hangs up. "So, apparently, the Inuit spell has some side effects." Sam Says

"Oh, well, that would have been nice to know before I downed it! What kind of side effects?" Dean Says

"When you mind meld with an animal, it's... possible to start exhibiting some of its behavior." Sam Says

"Don't look at me, Hoss. It ain't my fault." Colonel Says

"Well, how long am I gonna have the urge to..." Dean Says

"Sniff butts?" Colonel laughs

"Oh, whoa. Hey. I don't have the urge to sniff butts." Dean Says

"Yet." Colonel Says

"Do you really h-have the –" Sam Asks

"No! Come on!" Dean Says

"Well, Kevin doesn't know how long it'll last. It's not like it's an exact science, you know? But hopefully, when the spell wears off, so will the side effects." Sam Says As Dean takes a bite of a chocolate bar.

"I wouldn't eat that if I were you.." Dean stops with a piece of chocolate between his lips. "Chocolate? Seriously." Colonel Says As Dean lets the piece of chocolate fall out of his mouth

Sam, Dean and The Colonel walk across the motel parking lot to the Impala. Dean has The Colonel on a leash.

"Where we headed?" Colonel Asks

"Back to the shelter." Dean Says

"To sniff out more clues, maybe dig up something we missed?" Colonel Says

"All right, one more doggy pun out of you, and I'm gonna have your nuts clipped." Dean Says

"I hate to break it to you, Hoss. My sack's emptier than Santa's after Christmas." Colonel Says
As Bird poop appears on the Impala's windshield

"Aw, are you kidding me?" A pigeon is sitting on top of a lamp pole above the Impala. "Hey, dick move, pigeon!" Dean Says

"Screw you, asshat." He Says

Dean reaches out and touches Sam, who looks at him.

"Did –" Dean Says

"What?" Sam Says

"Wait a minute. Can I hear all animals?" Dean Asks

"Yes animals have a universal language – like Esperanto. But this one actually caught on." Colonel Says

"And I'm just getting started, too. Brewing a real big one. Ha. Bet your ride's gonna look sweet in white." He Says

"What's he saying?" Sam Asks

"You – he's being a douchebag!" Dean Says

"Who you calling "douchebag," douchebag?" He Says

"Oh, shut it, you winged rat!" Dean Says

Sam looks around at a man and a woman watching them. "Dude."

"What?" Dean Says

"Hey." He waves to the man and woman watching. "Just calm down. Just get in the car." Sam Says As He smiles

"Ha ha. That's right, Sally. Go cry to mama." He Says

Dean takes out his gun and pointing it at the pigeon "Oh, that's it, you son of a bitch!"

"Dean!" He grabs Dean's gun arm and pulls it down. "Get in the car." Sam Says then waves at the onlookers.

________________________________

ENID ANIMAL SHELTER

The Impala pulls into the parking lot, Sam is driving. Dean and The Colonel are both sticking their heads out the windows. As Sam parks the car, Dean blinks and looks somewhat perplexed as he brings his head back inside the car, Both brothers get out.

"I think it's probably best to just leave The Colonel in the car." Sam Says

"Excuse me?" Dean Says

"Well, all the windows are open." Sam Says

"You think we like that?" Dean Says

"We?" Sam Says

"You think because the windows are open that that's some sort of a treat, huh? No, the dog's coming in." Dean Says

"Respect." Colonel Says

Dean rubs The Colonel on the head and opens the door for him. They are heading for the door of the shelter when Dean's attention is caught by a white standard poodle with pink bows on its ears, which is tied with a pink leash to a bike rack. Music plays as He stares appreciatively at the poodle and the camera slowly pans up the poodle's body. Dean and The Colonel stare at the poodle.

"Dean." Sam Says

"Yep." Dean Says Then They enter the animal shelter

Once they enter the animal shelter, Sam and Dean begins questioning the other animals.

"So, what else can you tell me about the man with the cowboy hat?" Dean Asks

"Honestly, I couldn't see much." Dean is speaking to a Collie in the kennels. "Damn cataracts. And you know no one's going to pay for my surgery. Just another casualty of the system, I guess. I don't belong here, you know. I'm pedigreed." She Says

"Well, I'm sure you'll be out of here soon." Dean Says

"Please. I'm 14." Collie Says

"Good luck... ma'am." Dean closes the door to the Collie's kennel and walks slowly away. The Dog in the next kennel speaks to him.

"Once a day they clean these cages. Once a day!" He Says

"Okay." Dean Says

"A biscuit. Just one biscuit."

"I need a Raquel Welch poster and a rock hammer."

"I'm shaking the fence, boss. Still shaking the fence."

"Over here!"

"I was framed!"

"I'm shaking the fence, boss. Still shaking the fence!"

Sam is standing at the end of the kennels. "Any luck?"

"Hardly. And I'm not getting any clues – just a bunch of complaints." Dean Says

"Hey, pretty boy. Over here." Yorkie Says

"Yeah, uh, sorry, pal. I'm done for the day." Dean Says

"But I saw everything! And I'll tell you, but it'll cost you." Yorkie Says

"What? Are you kidding me? I'm being extorted by a dog. Well, what do you want, huh? What? Beggin' strips? Snausages?" Dean Says

"Bitch, please. If I'm gonna rat someone out, it's got to be worth my while. I want... a belly rub." Yorkie Says

"You – All right." Dean Says

"Not from you, sweetie. From that big one." He laughs and looks at Sam "Over there. Hi!"

Dean takes the Yorkie out it's Kennel, Sam is holding the Yorkie and rubbing its belly.

"Ohh, a – a cowboy hat, leather pants. The dude's a total closet case." Yorkie Says

"Okay, what else can you tell me about the guy other than his outfit?" Dean Asks

"Um, he was carrying a burlap sack for the cats." Yorkie Says

"What does he want with the cats?" Dean Asks

"Ooh, attaboy, yes. Hell if I know. But he took all of them, except for the one he ate." Yorkie Says

"Ew." Dean Says

"What?" Sam Says

"Apparently, our guy has a sweet tooth for kitty cats." Dean Says

"Huh." Sam Says

"Oh. Oh, and the sack had something written on it." Yorkie Says As Sam stops rubbing and shakes out his hand.

"Okay, what did it say?" The Yorkie whines.
"Hey, come on. We had a deal." Dean Says

"Well, you tell that to the tall drink. He's the one who stopped rubbing." Yorkie Says

"Sam." Dean Says

"Hand cramps." Sam Says

"He's not talking." Dean Says Then Sam resumes rubbing the Yorkie's belly.

"Attaboy. It said "Avant-Garde Cuisine." Lucky for you, I read French." Yorkie Says

"That's a café on Main Street. No dogs allowed." Colonel Says

"Well, no wonder he smelled like hamburgers and dish soap. We got to go downtown. Apparently our guy works at a restaurant." Dean Says

Dean motions for Sam to put the Yorkie back in its kennel.

"Whoa-oh, yeah. No, no, wait, wait, wait. Sure you don't want to adopt me?" Yorkie Says

"No, thanks. Uh, we'll pass." Dean Says Then closes the kennel door and he and Sam walk away

"No, I'm not above licking feet. Hey, big'un! Come back here!" Yorkie Says

"All right." He reaches down for The Colonel's leash "Hey, hold up." Dean Says

"What's the matter?" Sam Asks

Dean turns around then opens a kennel door and Dog 2 hurries out. "Freedom!" He opens another kennel door and another dog leaves.

"I didn't peg you for a softy." Colonel Says As Dean continues to open more kennels