I listened to the Bakugou oi oi oi remix for a full hour and now when i open my mouth to speak all that comes out is: Oi oi oi na? D e k u

Help.

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Also known as:
• Welcome to my favorite chapter, i hope you enjoy your stay
• This chapter is the definition of chaos
• no spolers today~
• oi oi oi

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~~A wild name guide~~

• Oboro Shirakumo - Loud Cloud
• Nemuri Kayama - Midnight
• Tensei Iida - Ingenium
• Mirai Sasaki - Sir Nighteye
• Tsunagu Hakamata - Best Jeanist 
• Shota Aizawa - Eraserhead
• Emi Fukukado - Ms Joke
• Anakuro Hirooki - Thirteen
• Ryuko Tatsumi - Ryukyu
• Tashiro Toyomitsu - FatGum
• Hizashi Yamada - Present mic
• Yagi Toshinori - All might
• Enji Todoroki - Endeavour
• Rumi Usagiyama - Miruko
• Keigo Takami - Hawks
• Yu Takeyama - Mt Lady
• Kan Sekijiro - Vlad King
• Tomoko Shiretoko - Ragdoll
• Kazumi Tsuchinoko - Uwabami
• Shinya Kamihara - Edgeshot
• Sorahiko Torino - Gran Torino

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Quick warning. This chapter gets kinda graphic? No body was actually hurt and non of it is real but i kinda popped off....

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28th September 2099
Class 1-A
~[09 : 00]~

Sorahiko Torino: Well then, since my classroom mysteriously caught on fire again yesterday, i have to set your school work over text. Your assignment for this week will be to research the basics of surgery.

Yu Takeyama: Im pretty sure you don't learn surgery unless you decide to be a doctor, sir.

Enji Todoroki: Rei said class B are just learning about CPR schnit

Yagi Toshinori: Nice save.

Sorahiko Torino: You're doing surgery because i know it's your fault my classroom is covered in ash, you children of Satan. You can form groups, no more than six and no less than two. Once you have your groups please come to the faculty lounge to collect the anatomically correct model as well as the necessary tools. Fuck you

Sorahiko Torino: **Good luck.

Sorahiko Torino left the group

Tashiro Toyomitsu: That was 100% not a mistake‐

Ryuko Tatsumi: Very obviously not.

~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~
Sextet of Chaos
~[02 : 13]~

Hizashi Yamada: Why did you all feel the need to make us do this at 2am?

Tensei Iida: I work better at night

Yagi Toshinori: I definitely don't. I can't even see straight–

Nemuri Kayama: Wait before we start i feel like we should name the dummy.

Shota Aizawa: Your not supposed to name things that you inow will get killed. Thats why most chickens don't have names.

Oboro Shirakumo: i had a chicken called bruce when i was young. He was my bestfriend, i took him everywhere with me on his little lead.

Yagi Toshinori: A chicken on a lead...?

Tensei Iida: Bless, what happened to him?

Oboro Shirakumo: i think i ate him unknowingly and got food poisoning?

Nemuri Kayama: We got sidetracked, lets name the dummy Enjee Toedorokee and move on.

Shota Aizawa: Great, lets cut open Enjee then. :)

Hizashi Yamada: I really hope nobody find these messages in the future and takes this wildly out of context.

Oboro Shirakumo: I have steady hands so hand me the scalpel

Yagi Toshinori: not to be that guy but this scalpel is yellow.

Tensei Iida: oh that? Its just mustard, i couldn't find a knife so i used that instead.

Hizashi Yamada: Shouldn't we wash it first?

Oboro Shirakumo: Oh too late.

Shota Aizawa: He'd already be dead if this were real.

Tensei Iida: What procedure should we do first?

Oboro Shirakumo: Lets start easy with a kidney removal, my opinion is expert, i took a quiz that said i should be a doctor.

Nemuri Kayama: You can take out a kidney and survive?

Tensei Iida: That was a very loud facepalm Shota.

Hizashi Yamada: Ok lets do this. Nemuri you remove the kidney, give it to me and we'll see where we go from there.

Oboro Shirakumo: Ok Nemuri, i believe in you, lets do this.

Nemuri Kayama: Ok i think ive got it.

Yagi Toshinori: Nemuri that is not a kidney. Where are you, i‐

Shota Aizawa: I blinked and now your holding a pancreas.

Nemuri Kayama: Isn't that where you store food?

Tensei Iida: I think thats a pantry, muri.

Shota Aizawa: I have never wanted to throw myself of a building more. Ok Nemuri just put it back where you got it.

Nemuri Kayama: I FORGOT WHERE I GOT IT

Shota Aizawa: HOW DO YOU FORGET WHERE YOU PULLED AN ORGAN OUT FROM?!?

Nemuri Kayama: I'M SURE SERIAL KILLERS DO IT ALL THE TIME, SIT DOWN.

Shota Aizawa: WE'RE NOT TRYING TO BECOME SERIAL KILLERS, YOU SIT DOWN.

Hizashi Yamada: If you both keep yelling, you'll wake Mirai and if you do that im sure we'd be left in the same state as Enjee.

Oboro Shirakumo: Just shove it somewhere behind the right lung. It'll adjust to its surroundings

Yagi Toshinori: Its an organ, not a puppy.

Hizashi Yamada: Ok attempt two. Toshi can you get the kidney.

Yagi Toshinori: Ive got it, Hizashi be very careful. It feels disturbingly real.

Tensei Iida: I think Mitsuki made them, she's absolutely terrifying.

Nemuri Kayama: WE FORGOT THE ANAESTHETIC! ENJEE HAS BEEN AWAKE THIS WHOLE TIME

Shota Aizawa: Your telling me this man was awake as we ripped out his pancreas and stuffed it back in before taking out his kidney.

Yagi Toshinori: I mean he's definitely passed out after all that pain–

Oboro Shirakumo: It'll make him stronger in the future, he'll live.

Yagi Toshinori: WILL HE?

Shota Aizawa: Im this close to strangling myself with his intestines.

Hizashi Yamada: Nemuri stop running around your going to bump into me–

Nemuri Kayama: Oops

Hizashi Yamada: I dropped the Kidney.

Oboro Shirakumo: fiNd iT pLeAsE—

Hizashi Yamada: I can't it fell out of existence!

Yagi Toshinori: HOW CaN a KidNeY faLl oUt oF eXisTeNce?

Tensei Iida: Its like when your eating and you drop a piece but its like nowhere on the floor.

Yagi Toshinori: Yes thats happened but we're talking about a KiDnEy

Oboro Shirakumo: Shota please stop trying to pull his intestines out, im pretty sure they're stuck

Oboro Shirakumo: Oh nevermind, thats a lot of blood. Rip to your room Toshinori, i hope you like red walls.

Hizashi Yamada: Why is there blood here, im going to cry

Shota Aizawa: I think its tomato juice, tastes like it.

Yagi Toshinori: WHY WOULD YOU LICK IT SHOTA? WHAT IF IT WAS SOMETHING ELSE?

Tensei Iida: Oh worm? I love tomato juice

Nemuri Kayama: I think you should take that straw away from Enjee's stomach hole thing.

Hizashi Yamada: Optimism time, the kidney was meant to be out anyway. Doesn't matter if its in a better place

Oboro Shirakumo: No it says on the instructions that we have to put it in another groups dummy or something

Hizashi Yamada: Ok google: How do you make a realistic looking kidney?

Yagi Toshinori: Ok google: How do i clean blood off my walls?

Shota Aizawa: Ok google: How do i make a noose with the large intestine?

Nemuri Kayama: Ok google: What is a pancreas?

Tensei Iida: Ok google: Is it ethically wrong to suck the blood out of a fake body?

Oboro Shirakumo: Ok google: I need new friends.

Yagi Toshinori: lets move on, next we should try the brain transplant. WAOT BRAIN TRANSPLANT

Nemuri Kayama: Torino is trolling us. I don't even know what a brain looks like

Hizashi Yamada: Thats just you.

Oboro Shirakumo: I hate how real this brain looks. I hate it more than Shota hates life.

Tensei Iida: How do you even get to the brain? Do you cut the head open or take the head off?

Shota Aizawa: You definitely do not take the head off

Nemuri Kayama: Wouldn't it be easier to smash it in

Hizashi Yamada: Woah there, i don't think ive ever seen a surgeon do that on Tv..

Tensei Iida: Tv is all fake anyway, hand me a hammer

Oboro Shirakumo: We weren't supplied with a hammer in the kit Torino gave us

Nemuri Kayama: Just use a book, think outside the box n shit.

Yagi Toshinori: This just looks like your bashing an innocent mans head in with a textbook. I didn't know we did murder at UA.

Hizashi Yamada: I think I'll close the curtains just in case...

Nemuri Kayama: Ok the skulls open, hand me the brain.

Shota Aizawa: The skull has been smashed to pieces

Tensei Iida: I have super glue in my room, we'll be fine.

Yagi Toshinori: Nemuri, your putting it in upside down

Nemuri Kayama: Both sides look the same, square up

Shota Aizawa: Is this finally over are we done now?

Oboro Shirakumo: We will be once you give me the intestines on the bed. Ill just spiral it in.

Hizashi Yamada: I'd like to say im going to sleep now but im oretty sure the nightmares will forever haunt me. Rip Enjee

~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~×~
The Next Week...
Class 1-A

Anakuro Hirooki: How the hell did you get a grade z? I didn't even know that existed??

Tensei Iida: Z means zuper shut up

Ryuko Tatsumi: Imagine doing so bad they had to invent a new grade

Mirai Sasaki: I heard the dummy was in such bad condition it looked like an actual serial killer did it.

Oboro Shirakumo: It wasn't thaaat bad

Yagi Toshinori: It was Oboro, it was awful

Hizashi Yamada: I still can't sleep.

Kazumi Tsuchinoko: Nezu said he's using it as an example for future years

Yu Takeyama: An example of wHaT?

Enji Todoroki: An example of the worst possible job done in medical history? What a fucking joke

Yagi Toshinori: We named it after you, next caller.

Rumi Usagiyama: Enji you can't call them out when you threw ours out the window after it "looked at you weird"

Tsunagu Hakamata: I watched it fall. All the organs came out. I threw up for hours.

Keigo Takami: Rip Tushinori.

Nemuri Kayama: At least you guys didn't get an order against you preventing you from going 5 feet within an open wound.

Tashiro Toyomitsu: Jesus fucking christ. What did you do.

Shota Aizawa: I'd rather not trigger my ptsd thanks.

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You made it to the end, Congratulations.

I was thinking of doing a character q&a where you can ask any major characters a question or me, the author of this find establishment~
So yeah if you have any questions for anyone just comment them^

Next Chapter -----> The swear jar