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Time 6:30 pm
Day 26/5

Not a word was uttered in the room but Thoma snuggling up to me and resting his head on my lap while mumbling gibberish . I did not trust him . . .Not yet. I could not bring myself to. Heck Janet would strangle me if I vented to a guy. " I don't want to talk about this . . . " The words came out in a whisper as I ran my fingers through the soft blonde locks of the man on my lap.

Childe did not do a great job at hiding his displeasure. The ginger had dug his white gloved hands into the sheets, forming a fist while the corner of his eye twitched in irritation. " Childe listen I can't tell you yet . . .It's personal," my voice faded as I avoided looking him straight in the eye; the smile at his face was failing and his eyes bore holes into my skull. " It's complicated. . . "

" Did you tell Thoma? Do you think he is really all that better? What makes him so trustworthy? I can . . .I can do it too lil miss. . ." The questions came one after another with his hand gripping at my jaw and forcing me to look up at him. " I can be so much better ~ heck I could handle you both like nothing. "

His expression twisted into that of lust and temptation. " I'll give you the real deal even-" before another filthy word could be uttered out of his lips something in the back of my mind snapped. . . And my fist came instantly bashing across his face.

I partly wished I had broken his jaw as his head flew to the side causing him to lose balance and have his face planted onto the rough surface of the room's floor. If only Thoma was not napping on my lap I would have had added more force and gave him a good beating.

The ginger wobbled from side to side, before sluggishly throwing his head back and cracking his neck disturbingly. " Amazing. . . " He sighed in bless, with his nosebleeding and cheek swollen and bruising. " Lil miss you got some punch for such a tiny body. Did I make you mad? I'm sorry lil miss I'm really really sorry ~"

He pulled himself up and giggled madly, before wiping the blood coming out of his nose with his hand. " Ah. . . I hope my nose isn't broken. . ." He talked to himself and ignored my existence as I tried to process how destuctive he actions have become. " Anyway . .. what were we talking about ?"

" About Kaeya's connections, " I switched the topic and the ginger seemed to daze off for a minute before nodding at me, perhaps having lost a few brain cells from the punch.

" He's actually used to be the middle man between the Dawn Winery and Boar Canyon's alcohol supply," he smiled proudly, before crawling over and resting his head against my thigh, and continued talking. " The owner tended to borrow money from him alot often, but for some reason he hasn't been visiting lately after Kaeya got kicked out of the Dawn Winery business by his brother . . . His stepbrother brother more specifically. "

Childe glanced up at me, his blue eyes dull and swirling with an unsettling aura pulling me into his gaze. . . He seemed different. . . More unstable one would say. Chaotic even ." Do you know why I like you so much my lil miss ?" He cooed, kissing my knee while not tearing his eyes off mine. " My hunch is telling me. . .you're all talk and not bite. Alas , you also have something hidden. I don't know why or how, but god I want to eat you right up. I'm better than Thoma. I am better. Do it with me lil miss!"

I nibbled on my lip, before looking back down at the blonde on my lap. . . That's when it dawned upon me that I actually hooked up with a person. A human . A man! NAKED ! I shivered feeling slightly disgusted with myself. " You haven't thought about it have you?" He sighed , clearly disappointed, cold breath brushing against my skin. " My poor lil miss. . . You a bit naive maybe even really naive."

"Shut up. . ." I yanked a fistful of hair back and earned myself a whimper from the man. " You work and I pay, the lesser the questions the higher your bonus!"

His eyes trailed down, a devious smile drawn on his lips . " Do I get a kiss as payment?" His level of shamelessness had no limits, unbelievable.

He did not even hold back the whimper that left his lips as I tightened my grip on him more. " You're. . . Insane," I huffed as his hand reached out to my cheek.

" I'll make him suffer for hurting you girlie . . . Anything at all,"he pushed himself up out of nowhere and pressed his dry lips against my cheek.

They were cold and dry, almost as if he were dead, however just as I put my guard down a little, he pulled something from behind my ear . " Tada ~ Got you a lead on your ex's falling out with the Dawn Winery. "
I yanked his head back again, making a sinful sound shamelessly come out of his lips as he held the small, folded paper before my very eyes. "I'm not after revenge. . . You don't know me," alas my words did not faze him.

"Or so you say. . ." He grumbled to himself. " Tsk. . . My lady your being too nice. You know that barman is actually a old fart that worked here when you owned this place."

I swallowed.
How much did he know ?
" I know enough my lil lady "

Pulling himself up from beside me, he dragged himself to the covered mirror, before pulling the blanket away ; staring at our foggy and old reflection in it . " Do you know why this mirror is here ?" He asked, pressing his palm against its cold glass surface, while his other hand reached the twirls and bends of it's golden frame. " This . . . This is the real insanity of your ex my dear lil miss ," a crooked grin spread of his face as his hand turned into a fist and pulsed through the stainless surface like a silent force. The frame shook, and the glass shattered into bits of shards and dust, mixing in with red wine water of the deepest shade. Blood, fear, and the stillness of time took over the room.

Childe did not even flinch, eyes blank of emotion and hollow, with only his fist still clenched tightly and knuckles stained in red and glass clinging to the thin fabric of his torn gloves and bleeding and brusied skin. " See my lady?" He calmly spoke, gesturing with his wounded hand to what had laid beyond the glass surface.

I was too distracted by the sight of blood to realize the unconscious man my companion had clutched by the collar. Was he. . ." My voice faded as Childe pulled out the small shard of glass that had stabbed into his cheek. And flicked it to the side like it was nothing.

" Indeed lil miss," Childe smiled calmly, at me and didn't bat and eye at the guy in his grip vainly attempting to escape. " This place is crawling with rats. . . Filthy little rats. . ."

Lifting the guy into the air like he was nothing, the ginger watched in pleasure the fear and panic twisting in the young man in his hand. "Were you expecting something from my lil miss, Sir Rat?" The man just sobbed and cried pathetically as the horror behind those dull eyes stared into his black soul.

In a split minute, the man had his face planted into the wall, knocking him unconscious and a massive purple bump growing on his forehead . As I leaned closer to look at the stranger I could only faintly notice the guy had been among Beidou's friend group. " Betrayal is what it is," Childe grinned, unfazed by the blood slowly dripping down his chin and staining his white shirt. " I've been there one too may times. My father thinks I'm a disappointment, my friends think I'm a freak, and guys don't like me. . .cuz usually their girlfriends do. So I get backstabbed often."

Despite laughing, I could hear his voice crack at the beginning when he mentioned his father, alas he was quick to regain his composure and toss the perverted man aside like the trash he was.

This ginger. This freak. This man driven by insanity. I was nothing like him. Nothing about him seemed to seek any sort of redemption. . . But that look in his eyes. . . .Like I was all that mattered to him. I loved it. I craved it. I age no idea what that barman had told him. . .but I was sure he could not possibly know everything.No one knows you like you. . . And I know I have been going through alot of the after effects of break ups.

Touchstarved.

Desperate.

Doubt.

. . . And Fear.

In this case, anyone who even bothers to give me attention would most likely have me wrapped around his finger. . . Kinda like how I easily melted into Thoma that one time. A sense of bless. And escape. The attention I always carved.

A victim of oneself perhaps I was, but the pleasure of it all had made me forget the world itself. " Are you okie lil miss ?" The ginger nudged the blonde's head off my lap, before squirming in himself and letting his hand crass my calf. " What now lil miss ? How will we ruin the man who stole your first love so shamelessly?"

I cooed his eyes and felt something in my chest squeeze. The pent up rage. . . The sadness. . . The fear. . . It was all stuck in the back of my throat as hot tear swelled up at the corners of my eyes as I stared into a blue abyss. His eyes seemed endless. I was drawn to them; they were like the depths of the ocean . . .calm yet distractive. " I didn't do anything bad just so you know , " my voce was dry, as if I haven't spoken years, maybe I really have not even, until now. " This place was never a club to begin with. . . It was so much better. Warmer, not like this."

He did not blink nor speak. He just sat there, cheek resting against my knee. . . And big blue eyes staring up at me like I was about to tell him a fairytale. . .