astroash: hey baby

caluminthehood: hi ash
caluminthehood: i've got a question

astroash: what is it?

caluminthehood: can i see a picture from when you were younger
caluminthehood: cause you saw one of me

astroash: yeah
astroash: gimme a second to find one

caluminthehood: okay

astroash: alright here
astroash:

caluminthehood: oh my god you were SUCH a bottom
caluminthehood: so cuuuute
caluminthehood: younger me could totally top younger you

astroash: no

caluminthehood: yes
caluminthehood: look
caluminthehood:

astroash: oh shit
astroash: oh fuck you definitely could've
astroash: wow
astroash: oh my god 🥵

caluminthehood: hah
caluminthehood: you were seriously so adorable
caluminthehood: i request another photo

astroash:

astroash:

caluminthehood: awww
caluminthehood: you were precious
caluminthehood: that's the cutest fuckin thing
caluminthehood: your smile actually causes me chest pains
caluminthehood: so pretty 😍😍

astroash: shush
astroash: you are way prettier

caluminthehood: how did you become so daddy

astroash: i don't know

caluminthehood: someone give you a really good blowjob?
caluminthehood: and you were like "i want this for the rest of my life"

astroash: i seriously don't know

caluminthehood: hm
caluminthehood: it's a mystery

astroash: so what did you do today

caluminthehood: nothing really
caluminthehood: found a better job

astroash: that's great love
astroash: what is it?

caluminthehood: it's nothing important
caluminthehood: just a hair salon

astroash: ooh
astroash: it's still good
astroash: your old boss can't bother you anymore
astroash: right?

caluminthehood: yeah
caluminthehood: it's on the nice side of town so no losers like him come around here
caluminthehood: and the employees are so nice
caluminthehood: there's this one girl Lexi
caluminthehood: she's awesome

astroash: hmm

caluminthehood: do i smell jealousy??

astroash: no
astroash: not at all

caluminthehood: you don't need to worry about her ash
caluminthehood: she gay

astroash: ??

caluminthehood: it's all lgbtq employees smarty
caluminthehood: mostly for lgbtq people
caluminthehood: but others are allowed in, as long as they don't say anything homophobic or insulting

astroash: what the fuck
astroash: that's rude
astroash: l.a doesn't have shit like that
astroash: and it doesn't make me feel better if there's guys who work there

caluminthehood: relax
caluminthehood: there is only 1 guy, and he isn't interested in me
caluminthehood: i promise

astroash: how do you know

caluminthehood: because he's married

astroash: but
astroash: you're gorgeous
astroash: doesn't matter if he's married, cal
astroash: he's gonna look, at least

caluminthehood: who cares if he looks?
caluminthehood: gays are pretty respecting people
caluminthehood: he won't act on it, and if he does, i'll tell you and you can deal with him
caluminthehood: okay?

astroash: fine
astroash: it's fine
astroash: i trust you

caluminthehood: good
caluminthehood: i would never cheat on you
caluminthehood: i know how much that hurts
caluminthehood: i wouldn't wish that on anyone

astroash: i'm sorry
astroash: that's a shitty way to be treated
astroash: you deserved so much better than them

caluminthehood: that's why i have you

astroash: you deserve better than me

caluminthehood: there's someone better than you??
caluminthehood: i doubt it

astroash: there is
astroash: i'm really not that great

caluminthehood: interesting
caluminthehood: point me in the direction of this "better man" you speak of

astroash: i don't know where they are
astroash: just saying that i'm not as great as you think

caluminthehood: but you are
caluminthehood: you're so so so sweet & caring & loyal
caluminthehood: and you make me r e a l l y happy
caluminthehood: and you're so insanely gorgeous that it hurts
caluminthehood: so shut up before i smack you, because i don't care if there is better people out there
caluminthehood: i only want you

astroash: stahp it
astroash: you're being cute and nice and my sleep deprived ass can't handle it

caluminthehood: sleep deprived ass??
caluminthehood: then go sleep dummy

astroash: i don't want to

caluminthehood: don't make me do it

astroash: do what

caluminthehood: i'm sorry ash
caluminthehood: you asked for it

[ caluminthehood added hemmotional to the chat ]

caluminthehood: luke
caluminthehood: i need you to be annoying

[ hemmotional is online ]

hemmotional: that's the one thing i can do

astroash: shit

hemmotional: ashton ashton ashton ashton ashton aSHTON ASHTON
hemmotional: you're so pretty
hemmotional: will you please fuck me

astroash: no

hemmotional: hey hey hey hey
hemmotional: do you have a dog
hemmotional: what's your full name
hemmotional: whats your sisters name
hemmotional: is she single
hemmotional: are you single

astroash: no i do not have a dog
astroash: my full name is ashton fletcher irwin
astroash: i'm not telling you my sisters name, no she isn't single
astroash: and i'm really not single and it's shocking you don't know that

hemmotional: who tf are you dating

astroash: the person who added you to this chat dumbass
astroash: this is not gonna help me sleep

caluminthehood: i'm sorry

hemmotional: well ashton
hemmotional: i am outraged

astroash: i am confused

caluminthehood: you may leave now luke

hemmotional: but i wasn't kidding
hemmotional: imma end the both of you

caluminthehood: let me try again
caluminthehood: get the fuck out before i kill you

hemmotional: i was not talking to you C A L U M
hemmotional: i was also speaking to ashton

astroash: i don't wanna speak to you

[ astroash removed hemmotional from the chat ]

caluminthehood: that blew up in my face
caluminthehood: sorry that i did that to you

astroash: it's okay baby

caluminthehood: no
caluminthehood: i shouldn't have brought him in here

astroash: it's perfectly fine
astroash: i don't care who you're friends with
astroash: although i am concerned by the amount of times he's asked me to fuck him

caluminthehood: i am not friends with him
caluminthehood: and you're gorgeous
caluminthehood: that's why he wants to be under you

astroash: and why do YOU want to be underneath me

caluminthehood: you're gorgeous duh
caluminthehood: and you are amazing in bed (or anywhere let's be honest)
caluminthehood: and you're strong
caluminthehood: and i love being dominated
caluminthehood: n you are very daddy

astroash: oh yeah?

caluminthehood: yeah
caluminthehood: and even if we were just cuddling
caluminthehood: i only want to feel wanted

astroash: cal
astroash: i want you to feel wanted
astroash: i hope i make you feel like that

caluminthehood: you do
caluminthehood: i just miss you

astroash: i'm glad
astroash: oh babe
astroash: i miss you too

caluminthehood: b a b e
caluminthehood: you called me babe
caluminthehood: i'm gonna die
caluminthehood: b a b e b a b e b a b e b a b e b a b e b a b e b a b e

astroash: why is that a big deal??

caluminthehood: cause you only call me baby
caluminthehood: you've never called me babe before

astroash: should i say it more often??

caluminthehood: honestly i don't care what you call me
caluminthehood: wait
caluminthehood: that's a lie
caluminthehood: i don't like being degraded
caluminthehood: i don't wanna be called a slut or anything
caluminthehood: that makes me uncomfortable

astroash: i would never ever call you that
astroash: or anything like it

caluminthehood: i know

astroash: so which names do you like

caluminthehood: you know most of them

astroash: yeah
astroash: baby, babe, love, my love, angel, darling, baby boy

caluminthehood: that's pretty much it

astroash: what about princess?
astroash: or sweetie?
astroash: honey
astroash: cupcake
astroash: sugar

caluminthehood: not princess
caluminthehood: cause harry's twits called me princess

astroash: Niall, Louis, Zayn, Liam

caluminthehood: yeah okay that makes sense
caluminthehood: i like zayns name but not him

astroash: why don't you like him?

caluminthehood: i just rolled my eyes so hard that i saw my brain
caluminthehood: as you comforted my dramatic ass, he was staring at it

astroash: yeah but i can just kill him
astroash: that should fix it

caluminthehood: yeah sure
caluminthehood: what names did he-who-shall-not-be-named call you when you were together

astroash: you can say his name cal
astroash: he isn't Voldemort
astroash: but i don't really wanna say

caluminthehood: okay first of all
caluminthehood: yOu cAnT sAY hiS NaME
caluminthehood: and secondly
caluminthehood: don't be ashamed of your past
caluminthehood: i know it hurts to remember him, but you can't act like it didn't happen
caluminthehood: you need to talk about it sometimes
caluminthehood: because it did happen, and it's not gonna get better if you keep pretending that it didn't

astroash: i know
astroash: okay fine
astroash: you wanna know what he called me?

caluminthehood: yes

astroash: he called me bunny

caluminthehood: oh shit holy fucking fuck that's so motherfucking cute
caluminthehood: and it matches you so well ash
caluminthehood: aww

astroash: you're really emotional

caluminthehood: yeah 🤷🏼‍♀️
caluminthehood: that's just so precious
caluminthehood: and you're so precious
caluminthehood: and now i'm imagining things
caluminthehood: permission to cry???

astroash: i guess?

caluminthehood: what if you bottomed to me and i called you bunny
caluminthehood: what would happen

astroash: hypothetically, because you're not ever going to be a top to anyone
astroash: i'd probably....love it??

caluminthehood: awhwhwheh
caluminthehood: i've topped before

astroash: girls don't count

caluminthehood: ew no
caluminthehood: i've topped to guys

astroash: who have you been screwing?

caluminthehood: nobody since knowing you
caluminthehood: besides you of course
caluminthehood: except that you screwed me not the other way around

astroash: yes well i know

caluminthehood: i should hope so
caluminthehood: if you didn't remember our first time together, i would have to smack you

astroash: of course i remember it
astroash: the way you pulled on my hair
astroash: the little gaspy moans
astroash: kissing me until i couldn't breathe
astroash: the adorable face you made when you came

caluminthehood: wow okay thanks for the recap
caluminthehood: how was that face adorable

astroash: cause your mouth fell open
astroash: and you threw your head back
astroash: moaned so loud it was almost a scream
astroash: but you couldn't stop smiling once you calmed down a little

caluminthehood: how do you remember that so vividly

astroash: because it's important to me
astroash: and i wanna remember it forever

caluminthehood: well uwu
caluminthehood: i think that was the first time that we talked about something sexual and i didn't bring it up

astroash: possibly
astroash: so when did you 👉🏼👌🏼 someone else

caluminthehood: before you texted me
caluminthehood: had a few 1 night stands

astroash: you said that you hated them

caluminthehood: nope

astroash: you said that you needed support & love
astroash: cause you-
astroash: actually idk

caluminthehood: YOU said that you hate one night stands because you experience emotions and get attached like a teenaged girl
caluminthehood: i said that i was lying to you about having them all the time
caluminthehood: never did i say that it wasn't happening

astroash: well okay
astroash: prove me wrong like that why don't u

caluminthehood:

caluminthehood: surprise bitch

astroash: holy shit
astroash: babe that ain't fair

caluminthehood: yes it is :-)

astroash: i cant believe that i didn't know you then
astroash: i wish i did

caluminthehood: why

astroash: cause i'd totally bottom to that any day
astroash: & everyday
astroash: & all day

caluminthehood: you're cute

astroash: no
astroash: i'm a grown ass man

caluminthehood: so am i
caluminthehood: but you call me cute all the time

astroash: cause you are cute

caluminthehood: no
caluminthehood: i am not

astroash: whatever you say love

caluminthehood: yes
caluminthehood: whatever i say
caluminthehood: cause you're the bottom

astroash: not anymore

caluminthehood: can we please please please try it just once

astroash: why

caluminthehood: because i want to
caluminthehood: and if you were the bottom for that long with nick, can't you try it once with me?

astroash: i don't know
astroash: maybe

caluminthehood: i suppose that will do for now

astroash: it'll have to

caluminthehood: fine
caluminthehood: oh wow that would be so much fun

astroash: i guess

caluminthehood: you know exactly what to say to me
caluminthehood: but now i know how to drive you mad
caluminthehood: and i can't wait

astroash: you only know one thing

caluminthehood: that's all i need
caluminthehood: i can figure it out after that
caluminthehood: you'll be like putty in my hands

astroash: no
astroash: you will not be topping to me anytime soon

caluminthehood: but

astroash: no buts

caluminthehood: bunny 🥺

astroash: don't

caluminthehood: b u n n y

astroash: stop it calum

caluminthehood: fine
caluminthehood: i'm gonna go to bed now

astroash: okay
astroash: sleep well angel

caluminthehood: yeah i'll try to get more than two hours

astroash: take this
astroash:

caluminthehood: hOw iS THaT gOnNa hElP mE sLeEP

astroash: i don't know

caluminthehood: how the FUCK are you so pretty
caluminthehood: it's not fair oh my god
caluminthehood: why do you like me
caluminthehood: cue self-consciousness

astroash: you're perfect baby
astroash: be quiet

caluminthehood: oh shit
caluminthehood: your lips and your hair and your eyes and wait
caluminthehood: is that the sex couch

astroash: is that what we're calling it?

caluminthehood: yes

astroash: okay sure
astroash: yeah it's the sex couch
astroash: wait why are we calling it that?

caluminthehood: it is a pretty self explanatory name ash
caluminthehood: i mean come on you're smarter than that

astroash: but we uh

caluminthehood: yes we had sex in more than one place
caluminthehood: shower
caluminthehood: bed
caluminthehood: but mostly the couch

astroash: wow you are so blunt
astroash: oh the shower was fun

caluminthehood: fuck i know
caluminthehood: can we do that again?

astroash: you're supposed to be going to bed

caluminthehood: i no longer feel the need for sleep
caluminthehood: i'd like one order of fuck me in the shower please
caluminthehood: actually make that three orders
caluminthehood: but after that i won't be able to stand
caluminthehood: or move

astroash: i wouldn't do that to you baby
astroash: you're precious and that's disrespectful and not caring at all

caluminthehood: what if i asked you to
caluminthehood: you'd have to do it
caluminthehood: and you know you would enjoy it

astroash: i think that's degrading and takes away from the purpose of sex
astroash: maybe i'd like it, but seeing you destroyed like that would make me feel bad

caluminthehood: that's why there's aftercare
caluminthehood: you clean me up and then cuddle me and give me sweet kisses until i fall asleep

astroash: and i'd really love that part
astroash: but sex isn't about how rough or quick or how many times

caluminthehood: i know
caluminthehood: well, explain to me what you believe it's for

astroash: it's to show your partner that you care about them
astroash: make sure they feel loved
astroash: whisper cute things in their ears
astroash: kiss the pain away
astroash: hold them close
astroash: y'know

caluminthehood: but sex-

astroash: that's not my point calum

[ astroash is offline ]

caluminthehood: no ash come back i'm sorry
caluminthehood: caring and loving things make me uncomfortable and i don't know why but please come back
caluminthehood: i didn't mean to be insensitive
caluminthehood: these things are just foreign to me and i don't know how to handle it
caluminthehood: i'm sorry

[ caluminthehood is offline ]

-