After Ashton had set Calum's bags in his bedroom, he had shown Calum around the apartment, and each time they spoke was slowly becoming less awkward.
At one point, their hands had even rejoined, but they decided to say nothing about it. They could barely even look at each other, because every time Calum looked at Ashton, all he could think about was kissing him, and when Ashton looked at Calum, all he could think about was doing it again.

Fuck, this whole situation was unbelievable; overwhelming even. Calum, for so long, had wanted to be here with the older man, and now that he was, there were so many things he wanted to do and see. Obviously he wanted to kiss Ashton again (and do so much more, although that was not the point), but he mostly just wanted to enjoy his presence.

Because over texts, Ashton was wonderful to talk to, but in person it was so much better. Hearing his voice in person, hearing him say all the things he had imagined for so long made Calum's heart beat faster, his stomach churn and a tingle run down his spine. In pictures, and on phone calls, Ashton was gorgeous, but in person, Calum could've cried because of how truly breathtaking he was. Being able to touch Ashton and be with Ashton made Calum ecstatic.

Eventually, Ashton had led Calum to the sofa, and then sat down beside him. Calum wanted to move closer, but he resisted the urge because he didn't want to seem clingy.
All of those thoughts suddenly went away when Ashton put a strong arm around his waist and pulled him onto his lap, which caused Calum's breathing to hitch and a blush to grow on his cheeks.

"Is this okay?" Ashton quietly asked, gently holding on to Calum's hips.

The younger lad nodded softly and tucked his face into Ashton's neck. "So much better than okay."

Ashton smiled brightly and held the boy even closer. The younger lad kissed Ashton's smooth skin softly a few times and felt his heartbeat speed up instantly. Each time Calum would shift his hips even the tiniest bit, Ashton would get that look in his eyes, the look Calum had only seen before in their facetimes. The look that made his stomach churn and his knees weak.

"Baby boy, relax."

"M'relaxed. But I won't be if you keep calling me that."

"Okay, sorry." He joined their lips softly, then broke away and chuckled, "Mm, could kiss you forever."

"So why don't you?"

"Because I also wanna kiss you all over." Then his lips were attached to Calum's neck. He just squeaked and continued to run his fingers through the man's hair. "I'm--fuck, I'm so happy right now I could break out in song."

"You have a lovely voice, Ash, that'd be wonderful."

His cheeks flushed. "Thank you, angel. What do you want me to sing?"

"I dunno."

Ashton thought for a moment, then quietly cleared his throat and began, "We'll do it all, everything, on our own."

Calum sighed out "beautiful," and closed his eyes.

"We don't need anything or anyone."

He hated singing in front of people. He hated his voice; thought he was a terrible singer. But in truth, his voice was perfect, according to those who mattered. And the person who mattered to him most was sitting on his lap, playing with his hair.

"If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lie with me and just forget the world?"

Calum sang the next part, "I don't quite know how to say how I feel."

"Those three words are said too much; they're not enough."

They sang together, "If I lay here, if I just lay here, would you lay with me and just forget the world?"

They stopped singing. Locked their eyes together. Intertwined their fingers. Smiled adoringly at one another. Gazes flicking from lips to eyes, over and over again.

"You're my entire world." The older man whispered, terrified of his angel's response.

"Doesn't that scare you?"

"It's a good kind of scared, I think." And he joined their lips again. Calum was just so overwhelmed. Ashton was his reason for living, and here they were, singing to each other and smiling like idiots in love. Ashton's lips tasted like sugar and strawberries and his smile could light up the entire sky and yeah, Calum was so totally screwed.

"So-" Calum moved away from the kiss, a string of saliva connecting their lips as they pulled apart. "Tell me, why haven't you fucked my brains out yet?"

"Angel!" Ashton gasped and laughed, "Oh my God."

"It's a relevant question, Ash."

"Okay-" He chuckled, "Um, well, because if we, y'know, right now, I'm gonna be rough and eager and hurt you and I know you like it like that but I just want our first time to be special."

"What do you mean by special?"

"I wanna be gentle, and take my time admiring you, kissing you, leaving my mark so everyone knows you're mine...I don't wanna break you. At least not the first time."

"But why can't that be right now?"

"I'm too excited right now. M'gonna...get lost in the moment. But I promise you, I do not want to wait." Ashton pressed a sweet kiss to Calum's curls. "Want you so bad, right here and right now."

His voice was deep and husky, sending a shiver down Calum's spine.

"Do you understand, love?"

Calum hummed contentedly and kissed at Ashton's smooth chest (since the buttons were undone and he had easy access). "Yes. I understand."

Of course, he wasn't expecting Ashton to tear his clothes off and take him right there on the sofa, but he was getting impatient. Ashton's little touches, kisses and words were his absolute greatest weakness.
The older lad knew exactly how to torture him; knew how to drive him insane without even doing anything.

He joined their lips smoothly and after just a few swipes of them together, Ashton was pushing his tongue past Calum's lips and tugging roughly on his waist. Calum weaved his fingers through the back of the older man's hair and immediately surrendered to him. They stayed like that for what seemed like ever until neither could breathe and they had to pull away.

"Pay attention to me." Calum whispered into his neck.

Ashton giggled, "But you're sitting on my lap, and we were just making out two seconds ago."

"I don't see your point."

"Okay, well, I love giving you attention, angel." He smiled in adoration. Calum didn't respond. He didn't know what to say. "You feeling okay, darling?"

"Yeah, m'good."

"Did I hurt you?"

"How would you have hurt me?"

"I didn't mean physically, love."

Calum frowned. "Oh." He shook his head nevertheless. "No, my feelings are fine, Ashy. I know why it's better to wait, and I'm okay with it."

"Are you sure?"

"As long as you keep hugging me and kissing me, I'll be just fine."

"Okay, beautiful." Ashton whispered sweetly. "Tell me if your opinion changes."

"I will."

They fell into a comfortable silence, and ended up spending what was probably a couple hours like this, holding each other and mumbling overjoyed incoherent thoughts. They also shared many soft kisses, though both wanted something a bit more, like what they had earlier.

Ashton felt bad for having to make Calum wait, of course he wanted it, but like he said, he wanted it to be perfect, memorable, special. He wanted Calum to feel cared for, and if they rushed into things, he didn't think that it would be the same as if they waited for the perfect moment.

Calum understood, like he said. And he wasn't going to think about it anymore. But his stomach was starting to growl, and he didn't know if he could ignore it.

"A-Ashton?" He carefully whispered, fingers still tangled within Ashton's soft curls.

"Yes love?"

"I'm kinda hungry..." He bashfully admitted.

Ashton mentally facepalmed himself. "Of course, it's such a long flight--How could I not realize...?"

Calum gently nudged the elders jaw with his lips. "I-it's okay."

"Can I..." Ashton quietly started, "Can I take you out somewhere? Like...a date?"

Calum hummed softly and kissed Ashton's jaw again. "Of course."

Ashton let out a sigh of relief.

Calum giggled, "Did you seriously think I'd say no?"

Ashton's cheeks tinted light pink, "I don't know, I-I guess."

"You're adorable sometimes."

Ashton stayed silent. His blush hadn't faded, and it made Calum smile even brighter.

After a short pause, Calum whispered, "I should change, shouldn't I?"

"I think you look perfect, but I kinda made reservations at a really fancy place..."

Calum slowly slid off of Ashton's lap and groaned. "I don't know if I brought anything nice to wear."

"C'mon, I'm sure you have something."

Ashton grabbed Calum's hand, intertwined their fingers, pulled him from the sofa and dragged him to the bedroom.
When they entered the cozy room, Ashton plopped himself down on the bed and waved a large hand towards Calum's suitcase. "Let's see what you brought."

Calum pouted, which led Ashton to gently grab ahold of the boys chin and bring him in for a soft kiss. "Please?"

Calum smiled against the older lads lips. "Okay, fine."

He started to pull his (Ashton's) sweater off, then bit his lip and let his hands drop to his waist. "Sorry, I-"

Ashton giggled, "It's okay baby."

Calum nodded slowly, hating how awkward he was acting. "I'm gonna change in the bathroom.."

"Alright, Callie."

Calum quickly scurried to grab a shirt, then rushed into the bathroom. Ashton watched him with a smile of admiration the entire time. When Calum emerged a couple minutes later, he was clutching his stomach in an attempt to hide as he kept his gaze to the floor.

He had only changed his shirt, from the sweater to a black button up. He kept on his black skinny jeans. They made him feel somewhat comfortable, although he still felt odd. And despite his better judgement, which urged him to stay silent, he spoke up about how he was feeling.

"Ash, I feel weird..."

"How do you feel weird, darlin'?"

"I just...I don't feel pretty."

Ashton stood up, walked over and captured the boys hips in his large hands. "You look absolutely stunning, angel."

"I'm just wearing a shirt..." Calum murmured, keeping their eyes locked together.

"Perfection." Ashton assured him.

Calum leaned his head against Ashton's chest. "Thank you."

Ashton began to comb his hand through Calum's soft curls, hearing the boy hum in contentment. "Why are you thanking me?"

"'Cause you make me feel like I matter." Calum replied breathlessly, lifting his gaze to stare at Ashton's lips.

Ashton let a wide smile take over his face. "You do matter." He nudged their noses together. "My beautiful baby boy..."

Calum bit his lip, still blushing. Ashton grabbed the boys chin again and kept their eyes locked together. "Can I kiss you?"

"You don't have to ask." Calum murmured softly, eyes twinkling.

"Yes I do, Cally." Ashton replied quickly. "Consent is everything, 'cause if you didn't want me to but I did it anyway, that would be so wrong and I'd hate myself forever for it."

Calum buried his hands in Ashton's curly hair then pressed their lips together passionately. Ashton kissed back immediately, tugging the younger lad closer by his hips so their bodies were flush together. Ashton decided in that moment that kissing Calum was his favourite thing. Calum felt the same way. Their lips fit together perfectly, their bodies matched up like a jigsaw puzzle, and neither of them knew how they had survived so long without each other.

At one point, the bed had been added to the equation (Ashton was on top, of course), but it didn't go much past small touches and kisses. They had already become addicted to each other, and because of this, they almost never left the apartment.

-

"This place is so fancy, Ashton." Calum whispered as they were led to their table. The only thing keeping him from running away was Ashton's hand joined with his.

"I told you that it was."

"Why did you bring me here?"

"Because you deserve the best."

Calum turned a bright rosy pink, "Thank you."

In short time, they had sat down, placed an order and were making awkward small talk and even more awkward eye contact. It wasn't that they had nothing to talk about, but that talking on the phone and texting each other was very different.

"Ashy?" Calum suddenly whispered, fiddling with his fingers.

"Yes darling?"

"You're e-even prettier i-in person, y'know." Calum brought a shaky hand up to cover his rosy cheeks. He hated his stutter and he hated how nervous he was.

But Ashton thought that his stutter was rather adorable. And for that reason, he grabbed the boys hand, intertwined their fingers and kissed his knuckles. "Thank you, but you don't have any reason to be nervous, angel. You know that I absolutely adore you, yeah?"

Calum nodded, "I can't help it, I feel like I'm gonna fuck everything up."

Ashton frowned and kissed Calum's hand again. "There's no way you can fuck anything up. Okay?"

"O-okay."

They both absentmindedly scooted their chairs closer to one another, and Ashton placed his hand on Calum's thigh. It caused the maori lads breathing to nearly stop. "Ashton..."

"Yes?"

Calum took a deep breath to collect all his courage. "I wouldn't do that unless you're cool with my pants dropping as soon as we get back to your apartment."

Ashton broke out in soft laughter, but Calum kept a straight face. Ashton noticed this and mumbled, "Oh, you're serious. Okay, sorry."

He pulled his hand away, allowing Calum the opportunity he needed to intertwine their fingers once more and lean over to kiss Ashton's cheek. Instantly, the older man smiled, which made Calum smile too.

After about another ten minutes of shy kisses and mumbled compliments, their food had arrived. Calum had chosen bruschetta chicken (by Ashton's suggestion) and Ashton had chosen a butter shrimp carbonara. Before they began to eat, Ashton placed a final kiss to Calum's soft lips and gave a gentle squeeze to his hand. The younger of the two almost instantly blushed and looked away. Ashton was pleased with this reaction.

And they were only about two bites into their meals when Calum spoke up, "Did you know that parmigiano reggiano, or parmesan cheese, is its own breed of cheese?"

"No, I don't think I knew that." Ashton couldn't help but smile admiringly at his angel.

"Well it's true." Calum smiled back, causing Ashton's stomach to flip. "But they don't usually call it parmesan, because actual parmigiano reggiano is made exclusively in Bologna, Mantova, Modena, Parma and Reggio nell'Emilia, and they're not exactly the same. It's a highly concentrated cheese, made of seventy percent nutrients and thirty percent water, and has been around for over nine hundred years."

Ashton only hummed, took another bite of his food and continued to smile. Calum noticed the older mans silence, and frowned. "M'sorry, I'm probably talking too much..."

"No, you're not." Ashton promised him. "You're just so smart and I'm trying to think of something equally as smart to say back."

"Oh, okay." Calum let out a giggle. "Well, what do you know a lot about?"

Ashton thought for a moment. Only one thing came to mind--almost instantly. "Guns."

"So tell me about guns." Calum murmured, smiling, and took another bite of his meal. "God, this is tasty."

Ashton chuckled softly at the boys words, then thought about where to start. His knowledge of weapons that were used to end peoples lives actually made him slightly sick to his stomach. But still, he began to talk.

"Well, one of the guns I have is a Beretta M9. It's used most often by the United States Armed Forces." Ashton paused and licked his lips, thinking of what else to say about it. "It's got a twelve point five centimeter barrel, and a maximum firing range of one hundred meters."

Calum smiled, probably much too wide. "Did you say one of the guns you have?"

"Yeah." Ashton replied slowly, smiling in return. "I have a Glock twenty-six compact pistol, too. The same one Keanu Reeves uses in 'John Wick'."

The tanned lad murmured something incoherent, which caused Ashton to giggle. "I also have a Desert Eagle Mark XIX. It's the most powerful semi-automatic pistol, and its fame is mostly due to its size."

"And how big is it, exactly?" Calum taunted, smirking.

"Ten inches." Ashton replied at the exact moment the waitress walked by to check in on them. Her eyes went wide and she hurried away before either of them had any chance to clear anything up.
They broke out in rather loud laughter, attracting the attention of fellow patrons, then both of them, at the exact same time, covered their mouths with their hands. That only made them smile and giggle more.

"She thinks you meant something else, Ashy." Calum whispered, still grinning, once they had calmed down.

"Let her think that." Ashton replied with a shrug.

"Okay." Calum's eyes were still twinkling with admiration. "So which is better, Beretta or Glock?"

"Glock, for sure." The honey-haired man immediately replied. "The Glock is lighter and smaller, easier to carry and use. More comfortable to hold in my opinion."

"And between the Glock and the other one?"

"I'd still say the Glock. The Eagle is really only good for two things: handgun hunting and long-range target shooting. It's very big and very heavy and that makes it impractical for basically anything else."

When Ashton finished speaking, he looked over to find Calum blushing and biting his bottom lip. It made Ashton smirk. "Is everything alright, angel?"

"Yeah, m'just...really turned on right now." He mumbled sheepishly. "Sorry, I know that's w-weird."

"It's not weird." Ashton assured him. "I knew exactly what I was doing to you."

Calum let his gaze fall to his plate of food. He felt embarrassed and nervous and he just knew that Ashton was staring at him. And the older lad was staring, yes, but only because of how adorable he thought Calum was. He grabbed the boys hand and laced their fingers together. "Baby, I promise there's no reason to be embarrassed."

"But..."

"No." Ashton whispered sweetly, and kissed the man's knuckles. Calum continued biting his lip to hold back his smile. They stayed silent for a long time, simply admiring each other's beauty. When Ashton let go of his hand, Calum pouted, pulling his signature puppy dog eyes. The older lad instantly noticed and brushed his knuckles across Calum's cheek before resting his hand on the younger boys knee.

Calum smiled, happy to still have Ashton touching him. Ashton picked up his fork and scooped up a bite, holding it out for his angel. "D'you wanna try some, love?"

Calum nodded meekly. "Yes please."

Ashton brought the fork forward, and Calum sheepishly took the bite. In most cases, that would've been considered romantic, and it was, but all Calum could think about was how submissive Ashton was making him. Holding his hand, touching his thighs, ordering for him, hell, feeding him? It was too much. Calum loved every second of it, but was mainly focused on the fact that he was almost fully submitted and ready to curl up into a ball on Ashton's lap.

He only wanted to be kissed and held and cared for, and now that he was, he couldn't handle it. He loved every little thing that Ashton was doing. He especially loved it when Ashton nudged their noses together and brushed his thumb along Calum's bottom lip, breathing a small, "You're so beautiful."

"You're s-such a b-bad liar..." Calum slowly stuttered out.

"But angel, I'm not lying." Ashton cooed gently. "You have the most stunning eyes and the prettiest smile and your lips are so soft..."

"Shush." Calum breathed out. "D-don't worship m-me like that, don't get so attached."

"Darling, I was attached the very first moment I had you in my arms."

"You shouldn't worship m-me like that, you're getting my hopes up."

"First of all, you told me that you like being worshipped-" That made Calum blush and look away. "Second, I'm glad that I'm getting your hopes up."

"Why?"

"Because-" Ashton started in a whisper, moving closer so that his lips were pressed against Calum's jaw. "I'm yours, and nothing can change that."

-

After they finished their main meal, they talked for a long time, all the while sharing a Tiramisu (Ashton fed it to Calum, which made the boy blush, giggle and curl into the older mans side). Ashton still thought that everything the boy did was quite possibly the cutest thing ever.

Ashton paid their bill (refusing to let Calum look at it because he didn't want him to worry), and they left the restaurant, hand in hand. Since the restaurant was not far from Ashton's place, they had walked. It had not gotten colder outside, but it was getting darker and the last few rays of sun were retreating behind the tall buildings, casting the city in a gigantic shadow.

When Calum first realized that they weren't going back to Ashton's apartment, he wanted to say something. He did not even for a second doubt the older man, or worry that something bad would happen, but he wanted to have Ashton treat him like a baby (pet his hair, kiss him softly and mumble sweet things to him, for example), and he couldn't exactly be 'subby' as he liked to call it, out in public.

There was something that Ashton wanted Calum to see, so he was glad when the boy didn't ask any questions. He wanted it to he a surprise. They walked for about ten minutes in almost complete silence, until Ashton heard Calum let out a squeak. He looked over at his angel, frowning.

Calum suddenly felt self-conscious. Really self-conscious. He thought his hands were too sweaty and his smile was crooked and his thighs weren't far enough apart and-

"Angel, what's wrong?"

Calum sighed deeply. "You're so p-pretty and I'm n-not..."

Ashton smiled sadly and stopped walking. Whatever he had to show Calum could wait. The boy needed to see how beautiful he was.

"You are ten times more beautiful than I am, love."

Calum shook his head.

"It's true." Ashton murmured, turning slightly to grab ahold of his angel's waist and rest their foreheads together. "You're fucking stunning."

Calum placed his hands on Ashton's arms, slowly sliding them up to his shoulders. The small action brought goosebumps to the older mans tan skin. Calum then moved his hands to cup Ashton's face, smiling brightly as the honey-haired man pulled him closer, holding their bodies flush together.

Ashton let his bottom lip rest against Calum's, and he smirked upon hearing his angel let out a shaky breath. "This is okay, right?"

Calum gently nodded his head and tugged Ashton's bottom lip between his teeth, releasing after just a second. It made the older lads stomach churn, so he properly connected their lips and ran his hands along Calum's lower back. Instantly, they both wanted to deepen the kiss. Ashton trailed his tongue along the maori lads bottom lip, cautiously, because he didn't want to scare him; Calum's lips automatically parted for him, allowing their tongues to meet.

Calum whined softly, ran his thumbs along Ashton's jawline then tangled his fingers in his hair and kissed him deeper as the older mans hands slid down to cup his bum. It made him gasp, not only because he'd wanted Ashton to touch him like this for so long, but also because he knew that he was wanted, and that terrified him. And despite every part of him that wanted to stay like this forever, he disconnected their lips and murmured, "Ashy..."

Ashton let out a shaky breath and leaned his forehead against Calum's, refusing to open his eyes. "I know, angel. I'm sorry."

Calum bumped their noses together gently. "S'okay...I'm sorry too."

"Why are you sorry, love?"

"'Cause I want it...want you, but you said we had to wait-" He let a sigh escape his lips. "I just don't wanna."

"Please don't think that I don't want it, love." Ashton ghosted his lips over Calum's slowly. "I want you so bad."

Calum whined quietly and let his eyes flutter open. Ashton copied the small action, staring almost intimidatingly into Calum's beautiful eyes. "I want you to see all the beautiful things this city has to offer before you show me your beautiful self, okay? I know it'll be perfect when it happens, but for now we just have to wait."

"Okay."

Calum understood what Ashton was saying. But he hoped that the 'perfect moment' came soon.

-

Hours later, back at Ashton's apartment, the pair had taken turns changing into nightwear, and were now cuddled up on the sofa. Oddly, they were so insanely comfortable around each other already that it felt as though this was normal.

Their normal.

Calum allowed a soft sigh to escape his lips as Ashton's arm tightened around his waist, and the younger lad tucked his head further into the crook of Ashton's neck.

"I feel like I've known you forever."

Ashton placed a gentle kiss to Calum's forehead. "It's the weirdest thing, but actually, me too."

Calum only hummed in response and took a deep breath. He was so glad that he was here with Ashton, and he loved everything about the boy. His hair, his eyes, his smile, his amazing personality and the way he smelled. Calum knew it was probably weird, but god, he wanted to drown himself in Ashton's scent.

He mumbled something Ashton didn't quite catch, then closed his eyes and just focused on breathing. The only thing running through Calum's mind was Ashton Ashton Ashton Ashton, and he had never felt this feeling. The feeling that made you warm inside, the happy, relaxed feeling. It was everything you could possible feel at once. Calum was elated and confused, felt great sadness but was also the happiest he'd ever been.

He both hated and absolutely loved this feeling.

"Baby, if you wanna go to bed, I'm not gonna stop you. You don't need to force yourself awake for me."

Ashton's soft, soothing voice cut through his messy thoughts, and he found himself nodding his head before he even knew what was happening.

"Tired." Calum weakly mumbled.

Ashton smiled. "Come on, let's go lay down."

Calum wasn't too tired to walk, but Ashton insisted on carrying him to the bed and making sure he was comfortable.
And as soon as he'd been assured that Calum was cozy, he started back to the living room.

"Where are you going?" Calum quietly asked, both his expression and voice pained.

"To the couch." Ashton slowly replied.

"Why?"

"To sleep?"

"But-" Calum pouted and felt his heart ache. "Why?"

Ashton stayed where he was and didn't make a sound.

"Please, Ashy, come cuddle me." Calum whined softly. "I thought you wanted to...?"

Ashton let out a short, nervous sigh. "Y-yeah, of course I do, baby."

In a split second, Calum felt the familiar dip of the bed, then Ashton's warmth engulfing him. A small sigh escaped his lips as Ashton pulled him into his arms and pressed a soft kiss to Calum's temple.

Calum already felt himself relax into the older lads touch, immediately tucking his face under Ashton's jaw and tucking his arms between them to create just a tiny but of space (even though he didn't want to), because he didn't want to make Ashton uncomfortable.

"Goodnight darling." Ashton whispered sweetly.

"Goodnight Ash."

-

They are so cute tf

It's really short but I've already written the next 8 chapters so-love me??

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