September 1, 1976

SHE GETS ONTO the train anxiously. She is picking at the skin around her fingernails as she tries to calm her breathing. Her cheek and her stomach still ache from last night. When she just barely touches her abdomen with her finger, a sharp pain shoots through her body. She has tried to cover up the scars on her face with concealer, but a small line of purple still lines her forehead from the broken shards of glass that cut her skin.

Scott Hassan had not wanted his daughter to play dress-up at an imaginary school where she would learn nothing. He had said she needed to stay at home to learn how to cook and clean because how else would she find a husband? Adira had only said one word before she was taught her lesson about not speaking back to her elders.

She can still hear her mother's cries ringing in her ears. She remembers exactly how her mother had lowered herself to her knees and begged her father to stop. Told him that she is just a child.

He had not listened.

Adira leans forward so that the cold glass of the window touches her forehead. There is a dull ache in her head that never truly seems to go away. She feels the lump in her throat before her eyes start to sting. She has not let a single tear drop down her cheeks in years. Since first year, she believes.

A memory flashes through her mind. Two older girls tugging at her pigtails in the bathroom, commenting about how her face was just as red as her awful hair. Saying that the bracelet she wore around her wrist looked like it came out of the garbage can.

Her mother had made her that bracelet the first time her father had hit her.

The girls had ripped away the bracelet from Adira's wrist and had torn it apart. They left her on the dirty bathroom floor, profusely wiping away the hot tears spilling from her cheeks.

This is the moment Adira often looks back on. When she had been a scared, little girl that took shit from everyone because she was vulnerable and sensitive. This is the moment Adira looks back on when she needs to remind herself that she cannot go back to being that girl. That girl who locked herself in the bathroom every night for the first five months of first year. That girl who kept her head down and didn't get into any trouble with anyone because she just wanted to fit in. That dumb, freckled girl who didn't know any better about who was real and who was not.

She has learned her lesson.

So, now, when Adira feels like everything gets to be too much, she pushes down the feelings. She looks towards the sky and blinks repeatedly so the water in her eyes dries out. When someone comments on her hair or her complexion, she flips them off and makes sure she isn't to be messed with.

Today, on this train right now, Adira remembers how she felt when she had been that other girl. The weaker version of herself. The truth is, she never stopped being that version.

Today, on this train right now, Adira lets a single tear flow down her cheek. A single drop cascades in a straight path down her cheek. She lets it reach the corner of her mouth before she harshly rubs her palm across her face.

Despite herself, a sniffle leaves her nose. With her luck, that is the moment someone decides to open the door to her compartment.

She jumps at the sound, and her mood is immediately lightened as a tall boy with long, dark hair enters. Grinning, Adira gets up from her seat and takes two large strides towards him so she is close enough to stand on her tiptoes and throw her arms around his neck. She holds him close, chest against chest, ignoring the pain in her abdomen. Her face is nuzzled into his broad chest as she sighs heavily.

He seems to be overcome with shock at the action for a moment. They have never been this close before, and Sirius is still long enough for Adira to believe she has made a mistake in hugging him. Her heart drops, and she starts to lift her head before a pair of strong arms twist around her waist. Sirius's head comes down to rest in the crook of her neck. His fingers tangle with her hair.

She smiles lightly before she pulls away. He looks at her then. He sees the redness in her eyes, how swollen they look. His eyebrows knit together as his hands come to rest on her face and his thumb strokes her cheek where a tear had fallen without Adira even noticing.

He says something, but she doesn't seem to hear. All she can see are his concerned gray eyes and his adorable little frown. Is it just her, or does her heart start beating just a little bit faster?

"Adira?" She hears his soft voice calling out to her.

She snaps out of the trance she fell in.

"Merlin, Berry," Sirius mumbles when he finally notices the scar on her face. His finger reaches out to lightly trace it, but the second he touches her skin, Adira winces. He quickly retracts his hand and frowns. "Was it... Is your father..."

Sirius takes a frustrated breath and pulls away from Adira. He turns his back to her and runs a hand through his hair harshly. His breathing grows more ragged.

Adira clears her throat. "It... It's not that bad, Gray. It's just a tiny—"

"Tiny?" Sirius turns around, an angry expression displayed on his face. "Adira, how many times are you going to defend him? He ruined your life. Your mother's life. Your little brother's life."

Adira looks down at her feet. "He's my father."

Sirius lets out a bitter chuckle. "No man that abusive can be called a father," he seethes. Adira lets out a silent sigh, but Sirius hears it. And he immediately feels guilty.

"Hey," he says softly, walking closer to her and placing a finger under her chin to lift her face gently. She doesn't move her head. "Berry. Look at me. Please."

She does. His eyes are swimming with sincerity and apologies, and Adira closes her eyes. She feels the touch of Sirius's forehead on hers, and she exhales a long, slow breath. Being with Sirius in this moment, in his arms, Adira has never felt safer. She has never felt more understood.

Sirius pulls Adira into his chest, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist once again. When they finally let go and sit down, they don't address the situation again. Instead, they talk about starting sixth year and about the new pranks the Marauders have designed and about how they hope the new DADA teacher won't suck as much as last year's did.

Eventually, Sirius leaves to find his friends and Adira does the same. The second they have to separate, Adira feels a sting in the pit of her stomach. She digs her nails into the cloth covering her thigh and takes a deep breath.