⋆ ☄︎. · ̊ * 🔭
chapter thirty-one

"Rise and shine!" Seokjin chirps, opening the curtains widely, causing many of the members to groan.

After Jin had been released from the hospital, the group had to tell their manager what happened. Obviously, he got mad because they didn't tell him in the first place, and that he could bring them there as well instead of stealing his car.

So as a punishment, they had to practice for the whole day, causing all of them to be completely exhausted. They just slept for a few hours but have to get up nevertheless.

"Yona, stand up," Jin mumbles, shaking her shoulders, but she stubbornly shakes her head as an answer.

He yells to the others, who are awake by now, "Someone wake this kid up."

"On it!" Taehyung happily exclaims, running towards the sleepy girl. The others simply sigh, knowing that he'll wake her up in an annoying way, but leave the room nevertheless.

"Nana!" he yells, excessively shaking the girl.

Her eyes stretch widely, mouth parted in shock. Soon, her mouth forms into a thin line, slight irritation rushing through her body.

But his wide smile immediately evaporates those negative feelings, causing her to sigh softly. As she's about to stand up, Taehyung holds her up, laying down next to her body while wrapping his arms around her tightly.

"We need to get ready, you know," Ahri mumbles, rubbing her tired eyes as a yawn escapes her.

He chuckles lightly, shrugging his shoulders. "I just wanted to talk to you for a bit," Taehyung states, his voice muffled as he buries his head in her hair.

Her eyes widen, slight panic building in her chest. "The last time you said that we didn't talk for a few days because you were mad."

Taehyung slowly shakes his head, closing his eyes. "I'm not mad," he acknowledges.

"I just wanted to make sure that you're fine," he whispers, holding her tighter.

Her lips turn downwards slightly, nodding her head. "I'm fine." A sigh escapes her. "It's just that." She struggles to end her statement, not knowing how to form her feelings into a sentence.

Taehyung is listening intently as she continues in a quiet tone, "I just really miss her."

"I try not to make it obvious." A frown builds up on her face as she continues. Yona herself is confused with her emotions. "I guess I try to forget about it myself. It's just so... weird—to not feel her presence and to know that she's..."

Ahri exhales. "Dead."

A few soft sighs leave his mouth. "I can only imagine how hard it is to lose your grandma," he admits. "My world will never be the same when the time comes for her."

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life." He nods his head. "It goes on."

Yona chuckles lightly. "You can be really wise if you want to."

He giggles at her statement, eagerly nodding his head in agreement.

After cuddling for a few more minutes, he stands up and drags her with him. "Let's get ready now before Jin hyung kills us like the last time."

The group always knows their practice is going well when the sweat droplets on their skin begin to run down their faces and limbs and splash onto the floor of the room.

Beads as salty as tears would run into their lips. By the time they're done their tracksuits are so wet it needed wringing out and their hair is plastered to their scalp.

Practicing sure didn't make them look pretty while they're doing it, red-cheeked and soaked in their own perspiration, but after all these months, more likely years of hard work they're getting quite proud of themselves for their development in dancing, singing, and rapping.

During a break, Ahri throws herself against the wall, rolling down with her wet back.

The sweat trickles down her back, free-flowing like condensation on a window pane, it beads on her forehead and drips from her chin. Quickly grabbing a towel to dry herself up, the boys sit down on the cold floor as well.

She grabs her phone to look at the time, checking how much time is left until her work starts.

The boys start a conversation, but their female member is busy responding to Jaehyun's messages, faintly smiling to herself while doing so.

Seokjin elbows Namjoon, secretly motioning towards the girl with a grin on his face. The group silences, everyone looking at her by now.

Yona slowly looks up, her eyes widening as she notices that everyone is staring at her with smiles and smirks on their faces. "What?" she asks around.

They innocently shrug their shoulders, waving reassuring hands around. "Nothing," Yoongi mumbles, stifling his laugh.

Her eyebrows furrow in curiosity, tilting her head to the side. "Who are you messaging?" Hoseok asks with a wide grin on his face, leaning over her phone to see it.

But she quickly clutches the phone against her chest, eyes stretched widely. "That's private!"

Hoseok hums teasingly, nodding his head while raising his eyebrows as if he knows what's going on. "Does someone have a crush?" He prolongs the last word, making cute movements.

There's a kind of blushing in her face that shows the soul, a sort of compliment to the eyes and the delicate sweetness within.

It shows a connection, that the smile and shyness come from some deep emotion, causing her to slump down in embarrassment.

The laughter is the sound of friends, but of emotional, teasing friends. Their voices come to her without end, playing like a track, looping back to the start with seamless ease.

She closes her eyes and covers her face with her hands. The boys' faces are full of delight, no trace of madness. They wiggle their eyebrows as they glance at each other, many giggles escaping them at the shyness of their female member.

"On who, though?" Namjoon smiles widely, a chuckle escaping him. "Jaehyun?"

Eyes widening, she moves her hands out of her face, shaking her head excessively. "I-I don't," she denies swiftly.

Seokjin coos, ruffling her hair. "You're so cute!" he exclaims delightfully. Jimin soon joins the eldest, tickling her, making the girl laugh loudly.

Everyone begins teasing her, except Jeongguk, who sits silently, deep in thought. Yona's eyebrows furrow at that, making the boys stop.

They move their eyes towards him, glancing at each other to throw questioning expressions around. "Koo?" Yona starts carefully, sitting down beside him.

Taehyung asks, "Are you okay?"

He raises his shoulders and lets them drop down quickly, creating a shrug. "Oh, I think I know what this is about," Namjoon states, nodding his head while rubbing the shoulders of the youngest male member.

Ahri looks at Jeongguk and Namjoon in a confused manner, wondering what's burdening him. "You don't have to tell, Kookie," Namjoon tells him assuringly.

"No, it's fine," the youngest mumbles, fidgeting with his fingers. After he sighs softly, he begins, "I used to have a girlfriend."

Everyone nods knowingly, but Yona is left with a confused mind, a surging perplexity building within her.

"We had to break up since I had no time for her." He elaborates, "I needed to focus on being a trainee, and dating someone wasn't allowed anyway."

He shrugs his shoulders again, acting like he doesn't care, but he actually does. Looking up, he sadly smiles at Yona. "And as they teased you about your crush, I just had to think of her again."

"Okay, first of all, I do not have a crush on Jaehyun," she states while glancing in between her members, holding a finger up to emphasize her statement.

"And second of all." She turns to Jeongguk again, wrapping her arms around him in a hug. "I'm sorry that you had to leave her."

She pulls away after a while, "But hey, there is plenty of fish in the sea."

A chuckle escapes him, her nonchalant persona brightening his mood immediately. "No, seriously, one day you'll meet true love," she concedes, "We still have plenty of time left. I mean, we're just 16."

"You're right," he concurs while nodding his head. "She just entered my mind at that moment."

Yona smiles at him encouragingly, rubbing his shoulder with her hand. "I should head to work now," she mumbles while standing up from her sitting position, patting the dust from her clothes.

Yoongi smirks slightly. "Why do you head to work anyway?" he asks curiously, wanting to tease her about her so-called 'crush'. "I mean, you don't need to buy groceries or anything like you had to in your own dorm."

Seokjin hums in a teasing way. "Let her be, she just wants to spend time with her crush." He wiggles his eyebrows as he glances at her.

Her mouth parts, shaking her head slowly. "This is not worth fighting over," she clarifies, making her way outside to take a quick shower.

As she walks out, she hears Hoseok yell, "Don't forget to dress warmly, it's cold outside!"

After showering and putting clean clothes on, she heads outside while listening to some music through her headphones.

There are times it feels as if the music is teaching her brain how to flow, how to be so peaceful.

It's as if the slowly changing tone touches different parts, a sort of auditory massage for her mind.

It is an invitation for slowness and to feel the presence of herself, the ever-patient version of her who waits to be spoken to and is content to do so.

There are times light, wind and nature do the same, yet differently, each in their own way.

Yona hums to herself as she peacefully walks to work, her hands in the pockets of her long, big jacket. She focuses her gaze on the nature, smiling to herself faintly.

Winter is here. The cold wind blows in her face, letting her know what to expect next; all the streets will be covered in a white blanket by the end of next week.

The wintry sun is the brightness and the most delightful event of the day, taking center stage as the blooms of the summertime become a part of the soil.

Sunshine and cold, the sparkle and the ice, somehow warm even when the wind bites. Winter takes her hand and shows its beauty, that in truth, is the dawn of the upcoming spring.

Her feet drag her towards the place where she finds peace, a place where her worried and anxiety-filled persona disappears within her body, the void filling up with warmth.

The tiny café huddles are despondent among the huge city buildings. Washed out under the overcast sky, it hunches in itself, fighting against the drizzle.

Hundreds of people rush by it, outside on the crowded street. The half a dozen customers glance up as the door swings open, heralded by a blast of cold wind.

Unlike the outside, the interior of the café is warm and cheery, with bright lights and colorful walls. The customers return to their conversations as the door swings closed behind Yona and the cold breeze is forgotten.

She immediately recognizes her friend by his tall figure, causing her to take quick steps towards him, her heart filled with joy as she's finally able to see him again, knowing that he isn't mad at her anymore.

He's occupied with his work, his back facing her. Yona smiles to herself as she covers his dark eyes with her hands, causing him to startle.

"Guess who!" she exclaims happily.

He slowly touches her warm hands, a small smile painting his lips. Swiftly turning around, a chuckle escapes him as he gazes at his friend.

Jaehyun wraps her in a warm swaddle of his chest and arms. It feels as if when she's in his arms, all her pain goes away, mental and physical.

"Hello," he mumbles into her hair. "I really missed you, Ahri."

She nods her head slowly, relating to his statement. "Me too."

Someone clearing their throat causes them to pull away, spinning around to look at their co-worker.

Seojun nibbles on his bottom lip nervously as he glances in between them, puzzled about what to do.

Yona sighs softly, taking slow steps towards him, making his mind a surging perplexity as his eyes stretch widely.

Slowly wrapping her arms around him, she embraces him in a warm hug, leaving him slightly shocked.

She strokes his ink-like hair as he hesitatingly wraps his strong arms around her, a relieved smile painting his pink-tinted lips.

The world around him melts away as he squeezes her back, not wanting the moment to end.

She whispers slowly, prolonging each word to make him believe her. "I forgive you."

The way his lips lift upward. The way his teeth are perfectly aligned. The warm glow his happiness gives. His smile is a ray of sunshine, and she's a sunburn.

Happiness flows through him, warming his skin like the rays of an early summer sun.

His customary cautious grin explodes into a radiant smile that he hadn't worn in a long time, not even as he finally saw her again.

Everything is going to be alright now, he has Yona and she has him.

They are a team. Again.

Forgiveness is a transformative act because it asks you to be a more empathetic and compassionate person, thereby making you better than the person you were when you were first hurt.

Jaehyun rushes towards the duo, joining their warm hug with a wide smile. "We're the golden trio now!" he exclaims in joy.

Seojun cringes slightly, a chuckle escaping him as he pulls away. "What are you saying, bro?" he asks Jaehyun playfully.

"Wait." Yona holds her hand up, stopping Jaehyun from answering the older boy's question. "You guys are close?"

The dark-haired boy nods his head slowly, putting his arm around Jaehyun's shoulder while ruffling his hair. "Yep," he affirms with a grin. "We got to know each other better in these past few months."

A wide smile stretches the girl's lips, happy and delighted that Seojun made a friend. And with a good person on top of that.

"Let's get back to work now," Jaehyun states, clasping his hands together.

After working for many hours, Yona bids farewells with the boys, putting her jacket on to go outside and finally head home.

She opens the door and takes many steps outside, the cold winter breeze brushing against her face, causing her to shiver.

The sky is black tranquility, married to the poetry of stars. It's the softness that calls the body and brain to rest and let the heart go to its steady rhythm.

Night comes as a reward of sorts, a restfulness above to calm the soul from the stressful day.

The road is midnight under the cloud, yet beyond is the dawn. As the sun sets, its rising is already promised to the land, to the green shoots who wait in faith.

And so, even though her eyes may only see one step at a time, she strides on, eyes heavy from the lack of sleep.

Her sight is slightly blinded by the glare of headlights in the dark night. Yet a sudden sound catches her attention, causing her eyes to widen.

She hears clumsy footfalls crunching over the stones further to herself, making her quicken her steps in fear. The adrenaline is pumping within her as the steps of the stranger go quicker as well.

Her heart hammers against her chest, her breathing rasping, gasping for air as her insides turn crazily.

As the steps won't stop, she starts running away, her feet causing the leaves beneath them to tumble loosely in the cold air.

Ahri's feet slip outwards on the wet winter leaves as she rounds a corner, the cold evening air shocking her throat and lungs as she inhales deeper, faster.

With each footfall, a jarring pain shoots ankle to knee, ankle to knee. Her heart beats frantically, all or nothing.

Fail and her whole body will pay the price, run and the damage is limited mostly to her shins and knees.

Before she could come up with a solution to rescue herself from this misery, the person catches onto her, holding her wrists firmly while pressing her on the wall. A hand above her mouth stops her from screaming, emotionally suffocating her.

A subtle smirk is playing the man's lips, his face oddly familiar. Her eyes stretch in fear, trying to kick him with her legs, but his body is too strong and tall for her to do so.

She squirms under his body, desperately trying to free herself before he could do god knows what.

"If you let one sound out," he states in a dangerously low tone. "I'll hurt you, damage your soul more than it already is, understood?"

Unwillingly, she nods her head. He nods his head approvingly, slowly freeing her mouth from his cold, harsh hand.

She wants to cry as rage fills her belly. Ears turning a dark shade of rest, she glares at him while screaming into his face, "Why are you so obsessed with me?"

Her father hisses under his breath, ready to attack her fragile body again, but he's being pushed away by a familiar boy's tall frame.

Seojun's sudden movement catches the older man off guard, so much force in every blow the younger one blows.

He rains blows onto the man as if he means to smash him into the very earth and Seojun is about to do just the same.

Ahri watches the scene with widened eyes, her body completely still. It is as if she has retreated inside of herself; instead of going in between them, she's watching in the same way she watches television.

Quickly shaking her head, she connects her soul with reality once again as a few people yell from down the alley. "Hey! What are you doing there!" a few strangers yell.

The female member swiftly grabs Seojun's collar, her strong body connecting and an advantage for once.

Running away, their breathing is heavy, but Ahri's pained legs can't carry her for any longer. She pants as her heart is pumping against her chest, unable to pace any further.

Seojun looks back with widened eyes, quickly taking hold on the girl's hand and leading the way to god knows where.

"T-Take a left," she breathes heavily, their bodies running through a narrow escape. She adds, "There's my home."

All Seojun does is nod his head, just wanting to rescue his old friend from her bad excuse of a father. The threats and yells from behind them cause the girl to let out frustrated and swift sighs.

They take a quick left, their legs like lead while running as fast as they can. Ahri somehow finds the strength again to drag Seojun towards the building she lives at.

She hastily fishes her keys out, opening the door of the big apartment, quickly slamming the door shut behind her as they enter the building.

She pants heavily while making her way to the front door of her dorm, opening it right after. Seojun is hot on her heels, closing the door while he tries to maintain his breathing, leaning against the wall.

The boys' heads turn towards them swiftly, terrified and shocked expressions on their faces, stopping in their tracks as they stare at them.

"What did you do again?" Yoongi yells, pulling his hair in frustration while standing up from his seat.

Jimin sips on his tea while whispering into Hoseok's ear, "Ain't that that Seojun boy you told me about?"

Hoseok has a shocked expression on his face, slowly nodding his head as his mouth stays widely parted.

Taehyung, Jeongguk, and Namjoon quickly stand up, worried about why the duo has terrified looks on their faces.

"I approved you having a crush and all," Jin starts while approaching them slowly. "But I didn't say that you're allowed to bring him into our house to do god knows what."

Ahri clutches her thumping heart, sliding down the wall as her eyes brim with tears, sick and tired of this constant chasing from her own flesh and blood.

Her members quickly rush towards her as they see her state, throwing around worried questions, genuinely concerned about her.

Her mind is moving around the questions like there's a hurricane inside her. It's moving like her brain is demanding the energetic expenditure of an athlete but won't tell her limbs what to do.

Her eyes are wild and when she sits up, she starts rocking. She gets faster and faster until she explodes into motion again.

Suddenly she's talking. Talking like she doesn't have enough time to say what she needs to. Her words are crowded together and some are missing. Her sentences are fragmented and her thoughts seem to jump from one thing to another.

All her fears are tumbling out unchecked by her brain, she's in some kind of mental free-fall, unable to analyze things or assess risk. The boys' words are bouncing off her like they are hard rain.

Seojun quickly realizes what's happening to her, pushing the boys out of his way as he squats down to be on eye-level with her.

He quickly buries her head in his chest, patting it while telling her, "Everything will be okay. Breathe in and out."

She clutches his leather jacket white-knuckled, her eyes brimming with frustrated tears. "I don't want to do this anymore," she whispers into his chest.

"It's okay," he assures while holding her tighter. "It will all be okay. I'm by your side."

After a while, her body relaxes, the swirling thoughts in her head slowing down by his soothing and soft words.

The group members are watching the scene unfold in front of their widely stretched eyes, curious about Seojun's and Ahri's relationship, considering that she said that she hates him with every inch of her body.

Pulling away from him, she leans into the wall while wiping her tears away, breathing loudly.

Seokjin demands to the others, "The maknae line will take care of Yona." He moves his narrowed eyes to Seojun. "While we'll talk to you."

All of them nod their heads, their respect for their eldest showing by their actions.

The younger boys of the group softly grip onto Ahri's fragile body, pulling her up and bringing her to the empty kitchen.

"Sit down," Seokjin demands in a cold voice as he throws daggers at Seojun.

The said boy's eyes widen in slight fear, nodding his head excessively while quickly sitting down on the couch, gulping a few times. He nervously fiddles with the rings on his fingers.

Yoongi and Hoseok sit down next to him, both of their gazes as cold as the north pole while Seokjin and Namjoon stand in front of him, their posture confident and rough.

"Where do you know Yona from?" Seokjin starts the court, looking down at the poor boy with unsympathetic eyes, his natural kindness and warmth disappearing faster than a falcon. "And what's your name?"

The boy with the ink like hair gulps as he locks his eyes with the eldest of the group. "I used to be in an underground group with her," he states nervously. "My name is Lee Seojun, 19 years old."

It's Yoongi's round to throw questions at him. "Why are you here?"

Seojun moves his widened eyes to the side, answering, "I came back from Daegu a few months ago since I wanted to graduate at the School of Performing Arts in Seoul."

"Why are you with our girl?" Hoseok asks as sharp as a knife, causing the poor boy to swiftly turn his head towards him. "She said she doesn't trust nor like you. So why was she with you?" He narrows his eyes.

Seojun gulps many times, terrified by the angry, yet cold man. "She forgave me—"

"What did you do to her that she got mad at you in the first place?" Namjoon asks coldly while crossing his arms over his chest, sucking the insides of his cheeks. "She isn't a resentful person, nor can she get mad at someone easily. So, what did you do?"

"I, um." Seojun clears his throat, looking at the floor in embarrassment. He sighs loudly, closing his eyes while hunching his body.

"After she started being in our group and rapped on many shows," he starts quietly, regretting his actions against her.

"Her father called me and offered a lot of money. I don't know how, but he somehow knew that my family didn't have much money and that my mother had a disease." Seojun tells the story, and the pieces of the puzzle seem to connect in the other boys' heads.

He continues, "I accepted the money, paid the bills for my mother's operation, saved her but let Ahri fall."

"My job was to deliver her information to that bastard," he hisses while thinking about him. "And my dumbass did what he demanded. I said where she lived, which school she attended, literally everything." His eyes brim with tears, clutching his head with both of his hands.

"Then he came to our garage where we used to hang around. He was about to take her back to Germany with him. Alone."

The young boy cracks his knuckles out of anger. "But my boys quickly got in between them since they were like older brothers to her."

"Ahri found out about what I did." His irritation is switched with sadness and regret, his voice going more silent with every passing word. "She got mad, slapped me, and I never saw her again after that."

A few tears fall from his eyes, his strong and rough persona fading as he talks about her.

"We used to be best friends. She trusted me with her whole life, and I used it against her. I used her vulnerable and hurt state, that nobody knows about except me, as my own advantage. For my own selfish reasons. For money."

The boys soften at his sincere words, uncrossing their arms while sighing loudly.

Namjoon begins his moral speech, "You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools the world uses to show us the right way."

Seojun shakes his head nevertheless. "I'm at fault for her agony. I'm the one who brought her father back to her life. He came to Korea because I gave him all her information."

"Now I know where Yona knows the sentence 'I'm at fault' from." The eldest mocks while rolling his eyes, sighing to himself.

Still, he squats down and looks into Seojun's eyes with his, his kindness back. "I don't know how many times I need to say this," Seokjin begins.

"But stop saying that you're at fault. Yes, you did bad things, mistakes, made her feel bad, probably made her cry, broke her trust, broke her heart as well, made her doubt herself, made her anxious, made—"

Yoongi cuts him off. "I think he got it."

"Anyway." The eldest shakes his head to restart his sentence. "But still, you're human. And humans do mistakes. It's natural. We learn from failure, not from success."

Hoseok adds with a smile, "And she forgave you." He turns towards the others proudly. "Our member really is a sweetheart."

"Damn right she is." Yoongi agrees while nodding his head. "Sorry, Seojun, but I wouldn't forgive you if you did that to me." He adds, "But Yona must feel something special with you to forgive your mistakes."

Yoongi smiles faintly towards the younger boy, but it falls immediately as he states, "But hurt her one more time, and I'll break every single one of your bones."