January 19

Hello.

Meet me.

I'm gay and loved a certain dark skinned guy.

I won't tell you his name because he didn't consent to this. And he won't ever be able to.

Now,

If you have at least a fraction of social awareness, you probably already know what happened.

Being gay is hard enough,

Being dark skinned harder.

Being gay and in love with a dark skinned guy?

Impossibly hard.

Gay.

The word itself was a taboo.

I don't understand, why should my sexuality matter?

This world is messed up,

So it did.

Everywhere I went,

I was the girly gay guy.

Even though I was anything but girly.

I always received dirty looks and was excluded from the community,

Simply because of my sexuality.

My boyfriend,

Someone who meant the world to be and someone who I love very much,

(maybe I should use the past tense but I don't want to because I still love him.)

Was a 'black'.

He faced hell lot of discrimination like I did,

Only because of his skin colour.

One day, he participated in a protest.

I encouraged him.

What bad could happen while fighting for your rights?

It's legal isn't it?

Little did I know,

I was wrong.

So very wrong.

The police opened fire on them.

My boyfriend was only one of the many blacks killed in the protest that day.

And no one cared.

This world,

Where you can't have your own sexual preference and where you can't be dark skinned,

Where you are condemned for something you can't even control,

Is not for me.

Kim Seokjin.

A tear slips down my eye.

I never knew.

I kept weeping and weeping for my own loss,

That I never realised that there were thousands of people who die every day and go through such a hard time for such unfair reasons.

Guilt overtakes me.

I am so self-absorbed.

As usual, sensing my emotions,

Jungkook wraps his arms comfortingly around me.

Even though I had told him that there was no need to accompany me today, he had insisted on it.

His touch calms me down.

But my heart thumps frantically in my chest.

"Yah! how can you just read and not comment and vote?! yah! YAH!"

*sighs* forgive Seokjin.