I managed to sleep fine today even after waking up many times during the night the doctors here didn't leave me alone even for a second and thanks to them i managed to get on my feet again .

This morning i managed to stand up by myself without feeling dizzy and i had asked them to bring me my daughter , not to hug her but just to see her even from afar . I put on a long robe and they walked me to her room , the doctors said i was well and that i recovered but i didn't want to put someone's life at risk and especially hers .

I stood next to her window and there was a girl standing next to her rocking her crib so she can sleep , they told me that she hadn't been able to sleep ever since i got sick and it gave me more strength to get up and help myself recover .

« Mahidevran sultan kept an eye on her your highness , it is difficult for a newborn to spend their first days without their mother » one of the servants said trying to console me but i couldn't help but feel  guilty and selfish at some point even if it was out of my  control.

« I want to go back to the capital , i need to be with Mustafa »i  said impatiently ,i  had to go back and show everyone that i  got back from the dead and that i am better now .

« I hope so too sultana , it's been tough for you and i am sure everyone in the palace is waiting for you » she tried to console me again while i stared at my daughter from afar .

I watched her play with her hands in the air while the girl struggled to put her to sleep , i wanted to step in and rock her crib myself but i felt like i was still contagious even if i wasn't .

I felt like my touch was poisonous and it didn't feel right so i kept watching from afar . I was lost in my thoughts looking at my daughter when i heard someone call my name .
It wasn't just a normal call , this voice didn't belong to someone that i didn't know , it belonged to my one and only person.

Mustafa , it was him .
The moment we saw each other , time seemed to slow down as our eyes locked hinting a look of longing , relief and an overwhelming love

He then hugged me , he embraced me like i was a fragile leaf but tight enough to make me feel how much he missed me . it felt like everything else melted away and it was just us in this world , i longed for this touch for so long .

« My beautiful princess » he kissed the top of my head and sighed in relief as he kept hugging me , i wrapped my hands around his back and rested on his shoulder before backing away slightly , our faces inches apart from each other .

« I have missed you so much , you can't even realise how much i've missed your presence , i don't even recall how i got here » he put his hands out to cup my cheeks .

« I thank god he gave me another life to spend it with you » i said feeling truly thankful for this blessing

« Mustafa , i am afraid i will contaminate you » i said remembering my sickness , he shook his head and stayed still « You're all good , you should believe the doctors » he tired to reassure me but i couldn't help .

«  I don't want to leave you ever again » he said placing a soft kiss on my forehead « let me take you to your room » he grabbed my hand making sure i could stand on my feet and leaded me to Mahidevran sultan's room .

« You will find out » he reassured me and i nodded trusting him blindly , we both stepped inside and found Mahidevran sultan inside chatting with her servant Fidan .

« Mustafa ? we didn't agree on this » She looked surprised to see him here and immediately got up from her seat « You shouldn't be here » she said hinting confusion and frustration at the same time .

« Mother calm down , i am leaving today but i wanted to make things clear before i leave you here » i looked at him shocked at the mention of leave you here .

« What ? what do you mean by leave you here ? we are supposed to go back home all together » i asked confused about his answer .

« Yes you will both stay here » he announced before sitting down the couch facing us « I am doing this for the sake of revenge , this time i stepped on Hurrem sultan's tail » He explained but nothing was clear for me , what did he mean by it ?

« Hurrem sultan hired a girl that brought a cloth to your room to contaminate you , and of course it made you sick and killed your servant but i promised to make her pay for it » I stood there completely silent and puzzled by his words.

They killed my one and only friend here , the only person i entrusted my life to, the only one that loved me in that palace . They killed Fahriye .

« What do they have instead of hearts ? i can't believe this » i managed to say in disbelief, my eyes got teary when i remembered that i lost my bestfriend and the only person i trusted .

« I promise , i will make her pay for this but i didn't want to bother my father with this while he's focused on his campaign ? that is why i decided to wait until he comes back because in the end she's his wife and i cannot do anything to her » Mustafa explained and based on his way of speaking , it was clear it took him time to resonate rationally like this .

« But why do we have to stay here ? » Mahidevran sultan asked not understanding what he was intending to do .

« I want to let her think that Stella didn't recover , we will find a story to tell . Because believe me i don't want her to get rid of evidence or kill the woman that did everything , because if she hears Stella is back , she will get her guard up and will get rid of evidence » he explained but deep down , i didn't like this idea . because i was going to be separated from him again and god knows for how long .

« It is resonable but i can't leave you by yourself in the palace » Mahidevran sultan interfered ,opposing the idea of staying without her son .

« I don't have another choice mother , it's either i risk the evidence and my wife's life again or i keep you here safe and make sure hurrem sultan doesn't get rid of her evidence » He explained again feeling perplexed and overwhelmed .

« I can stay alone here , Mahidevran sultan is right » He looked at me surprised before shaking his head « No Mustafa , i will not rest assured here without knowing that someone i trust fully is with you , let Mahidevran sultan go with you » when he say me insisting he exchanged looks with his mother .

« She's right , listen to her » His mother supported my argument making him cornered between two decisions but he ended up accepting my request.

« We will proceed this way , but my father isn't coming back yet . I'm afraid it takes him a year or so » He expressed his worry because he had never been this close to exposing hurrem sultan .

« We will expose her , and we will keep digging for more proof until it's clear . And i'm sure Mahidevran sultan will help you » He stood up from his seat and walked towards me and nodded « with both of you i am sure we can » he looked at me then his mother who left once his eyes were on here leaving us two .

« I am doing everything for you , you cannot imagine my anger and the pain i felt when i found out everything , you are paying for the hatred she has towards me » He put his hand on my shoulder making me step closer to him .

« If it means that you will be unharmed then so be it » i answered confidently « I also have to take my daughter with me » my heart dropped at the sentence .

I felt like my face completely dropped and my heart shattered at this point.

« i know .. but they have left me no choice but i want you to remember that we're doing this for us and for me » I felt wronged and hurt, i knew i was doing doing all of this for the sake of the truth but i was still a mother , i didn't get to spend time with her .

« I will do my best to let you see her from time to time  , i hate to see you sad and down like this . I know how hard it is for you but i want you to remember the cause for all of this and why are doing it , you're my strong other half and if you do not agree or feel very bad then i will gladly give up on everything , you know i can do it . One word from you and i will stop and take you back to where you belong , next to me . And i'll forget about this revenge , my main purpose is to keep you safe and secure and that hurrem sultan leaves us alone »

I resonated with every word that came out of his mouth , i undoubtedly married the most perfect man in this entire universe . He had left me no words left to say

« I am with you until the end , i will stay patient until you reach your end with her . I want her out of our lives forever » I said finally determined and sure of my choice , even if i had to step on my heart and my feelings .

« You're sure ? » he asked once again « I told you that i can stop everything » I nodded fully determined about my choice .

« Perfect » he clasped his hands together « I will stay here tonight but i will leave tomorrow , along with my mother and daughter . We should make the most out of it right ? » He said caressing my cheek gently .

We then called the servants to bring my daughter so i can spend time with her , As i put her on my arms i immediately felt the warmth of her tiny body and kissed her forehead , i had missed my child . Mustafa stayed with us and played with her every now and then , i knew i had to cherish this moment before i get back to the absolute lonely and miserable state .

After i spent time with my daughter , she had to sleep as the night was approaching , letting me spend more time with Mustafa . We didn't have our time together  very often because we'd sometimes just talk and talk for hours .

But i decided that i wanted to be with him tonight , at least i want to before he leaves me again .