⋆ ☄︎. · ̊ * 🔭
chapter twenty-five

━━ ✦ ━━

thatsjjk
tomorrow night

thatsjjk
you

thatsjjk
me

thatsjjk
my house

me
erase the "you" from your message
and we're all set🥰

thatsjjk
what why >:(

me
i'm not too sure why but i think there's a so-called thing called "university" in yura's life that she, somehow, and for still unknown reasons, has to attend and study for

me
just an assumption tho

thatsjjk
not u leaving me hanging for that useless school shit🙄🙄

me
boy i have studies to do

thatsjjk
oh now i know how it is

me
you probably don't

thatsjjk
i'm not as important to u as i thought i was

me

thatsjjk

thatsjjk
u r not even denying it wtf😭

me
oh, i'm sorry? is my education supposed to be more important than a boy i have no real establishment of a relationship with? funny😀

thatsjjk
chile not u going there🤭

me
look

me
I've worked my ass off to be in this position that I am in right now and to attend a great university to start with

me
and you're not going to ruin it for me in any ways of distraction

me
I have to study and you should respect that

me
there I said it

thatsjjk
that's fine cuz i like my women educated and smart anyway😏

me

thatsjjk
hey i remember u saying that yesterday night to me!

thatsjjk
funny how there's a meme of it :')

me

me
did we ever have a real conversation

thatsjjk
what do u consider a real conversation? aren't the things i say to u during sex enough? 🌞

me
i'm talking to a fucking wall 🌚

thatsjjk
well u WERE kinda talking to a wall yesterday night when i...

me
SHUT UP OMG DON'T EVEN THINK OF FINISHING THAT SENTENCE

me
why is everything i say to you sexualized?😀

thatsjjk
because that's kinda how our relationship is?

me
oh

me
yeah lol

thatsjjk
so,, i guess u r not available tomorrow?
read 5:32 pm

thatsjjk
hello?
read 5:34 pm

thatsjjk
yo yura u still there?
read 5:34

me
yeah ahah

me
sorry had to do some laundry

thatsjjk
it's fine!

thatsjjk
oh i have to log off and go out to eat with my hyungs now

thatsjjk
see u in uni!!

thatsjjk
wear whatever u feel comfortable in🥰

me
yeah bye :)

An elongated sigh leaves the crook of Yura's throat as she stares down at the messages, blinking.

She feels like her mind is on an incessant carousel; spinning without the trace of an end, as more and more passengers get on.

Suddenly, it hits her like a truck. The realization makes her eyes rip open and her blood run cold.

"No," she says while laughing it off awkwardly. Yura shakes her head, waving her hand around in denial with chuckles escaping her. "Ah-haha, ridiculous."

"Why are you talking to yourself again?"

Shocked, she spins around in her swivel-chair and looks at her roommate. Jimin just stares at her in concern, blinking with crossed arms.

"Me? Talking to myself? No." She excessively shakes her head, figure stiffened.

All Jimin does is sigh as a response to that. He quietly sits down on her bed to face the girl. For some moments, there is only silence as he simply examines her facial features.

He knows.

"Oh, girl, nah—"

"What?!" Yura exclaims in fear and curiosity.

"Do you have a crush?" He cups his mouth, eyes widened. "That's so embarrassing—"

Frantically, Yura waves her hands around; slicing his words. "Crush?! Hell, no! Why would you even—" Her cheeks are suddenly heating up. "I mean, me—That's just—No—"

"On who?" Nonetheless, Jimin continues bombing her with accusations. He can identify her emotions with ease, even if it may be clouded by severe fogs. "Please don't tell me that you actually have feelings for that Jungkook boy—"

"I don't." She swiftly shakes her head. "I would never. That's impossible. He's not even my type."

Though those words of denial do not reassure Jimin. Not at all. "Denial is the first stage," he says quietly.

There's profound sadness on his face, and it shows through his downturned lips and furrowed brows. An ocean of pity swims in his eyes. Yura despises seeing it. She mentally curses herself.

"I don't know..." Her head falls, gaze located at the ground. "It's just that..." She sniffles. "He's so... It's different when I'm with him. It's almost like he purposely takes me somewhere else... But, like, mentally." She gulps. "I think I like him, I—Maybe I'm just tripping..."

"This is so bad," Jimin whispers to himself, sighing. But he soon composed himself and engulfs her hands with his own. "Look at me, Yura."

And she does. Those gravity-drawn shoulders illustrate her genuine confusion and hidden torment. The sight causes Jimin's heart to drown.

"You don't like him."

He firmly shakes his head again. As she wants to speak up, he's quick to prevent her from doing that.

"You only like the idea of being loved. He is not the one for you, baby." Jimin sadly shakes his head. "I understand that you've been seeking for adoration and validation through many relationship because of your father—and that is completely okay—but you need to realize—"

"This has nothing to do with him." Yura's hands have dropped temperatures; running cold, as she sharply releases them from her friend's. Her voice is detached, cold. "Just because I may have had a few questionable relationships, doesn't mean that it has something to do with older issues—"

Jimin swiftly interrupts her. Yet, this time, it's way harsher, "That's way you always tell yourself!" She instantly shuts up at his upset voice. "Have you ever wondered why you continuously throw yourself into toxic relationships? Remember Liu—the one who emotionally manipulated you and ruined your self-esteem? Or what about Dongha? The one who actually had kids behind your back, for God's sake, Yura. And let's not forget about our beloved Seokjin—"

"Shut up!" By her chair, she pushes herself away from him, voice cracking at the very end. Yura tries controlling her heavy breathing, but the huge lump in her throat does her no justice.

"Just..." Silvery tears flow through her eyes, turning her vision blurry. She softly says, "Just shut up..."

She doesn't want to. She really doesn't want to, yet she can't stop the tears from spilling. Her dam of emotions is spluttered—broken, really. Yura's face is as blank as a piece of paper as the tears fall.

A shaky breath escapes Jimin, who is swift to wrap his arms around the girl's shoulders. "You aren't alone, Yura. Please never forget that. You don't need those useless men."

"F-Word that boy Jungkook," he states.

Yura looks down blandly.

"I think I've done that a bit too much."

Their hearts were a wishing well. Bottomless. Trying to love them bankrupted her.

( AUTHOR'S NOTE ! )
i have commitment issues and it shows.

i am legit so sorry that i haven't updated this
book in more than a fuckimg YEAR😭lmao
i don't even wanna pull out any excuses, it's just me getting bored way too quickly and being unable to commit to a task to finish it.

i will be trying my best to end this book.
until then, please bear with my ass lmao