heaven can wait 

december 28

taking a quick glance at the calendar hanging on the walls of your bedroom. then taking a look at the clock sitting on your shelf reading; 2:09 PM, your mother still at work. you were bored as if it wasn't obvious.

 you watched the silly person named boredom throwing a ball up and down in  your mind. up and down, and up and down, and down? lower and lower, the ball hitting the river of water, before deflating into a bunch of blue rose petals. 

you watched as boredom waved goodbye to the beautiful cerulean flower petals running down the stream of the river.

slowly opening your eyes, your hands grasping onto the warmth of your light blue comforter you were sure you were going to melt into the comforting feeling of your bed, if you didn't get t up.

looking up to the clock on your shelf, mimicking the actions beforehand the clock reading 2:30 PM.

weird ..

you could've sworn you weren't sleep for more than five minutes.

"man, whatever weird ass fever dream." you spoke out loud to nobody but yourself. 

"where is my momma" you whine to yourself, you were hungry, and cooking for yourself didn't hit like your moms.

as If on cue, you hear the front door slam open, and the sound of your moms keys shaking throughout the house letting you know she was making her way to your room.

opening your bedroom door before walking in,  taking a few looks around the  room before speaking up,

"I know yo' ass ain't sleeping." 

lifting yourself up from the bed letting the tiredness in your limbs disappear you respond,

"nope, I never sleep ma' it's for the weak"

"..mhm, if sleep for the weak where my sign up paper at" she mumbles  to herself "go get them groceries from the back of that car please."

"yeah no problem." you say already on the move to get the groceries for your dear mother.

putting the last of the groceries on the table, you peak at your mom sitting on the couch while you unbag the groceries, "so mommaaa" you draw out

"yes?" she responds after a brief amount of time and a visit to antartica.

"you know winter break is over for me on the 4th right?"

"mhm.. what are we getting at child?" your mom asks with get up out of my face tone

"Im gettin' there ma, anywho," taking a deep breath you decide to let it all out in one big cluster of words.

"I have to go back early, but it's okay because I'll be back soon, and I love you momma"

exhaling you look at your unbothered mom

"..okay." 

that's it?

"okay?" you repeat, "mom your not totally miserable that I'm leaving early?" you fake sad.

"miserable? please chile? I have shit to do that's fun, you just got a ass load of work!"  she laughs in your face 

your smile growing bigger knowing that your mom isn't gonna be sad.

"good ma' im glad you not gon' be sad" you grin widely at her

"I am gonna miss you though'." your mom reminds you 

"me too ma' I'll be back soon" you carefully place your arms around her neck the scent of her perfume comforting you.

 your mother was your best friend considering the fact that  she was widowed, and you were left with a passed father, at the age of 12. you being the only child your mom made a goal to be the best for you since your late father passed. 

"ok enough of this emotional stuff, when do you leave?" your mom asks with a soft tone to her voice

"early tomorrow morning."  you pout at the early part, you weren't a fan of the mornings.

"good luck getting up because im not gonna wake you" your mom jokes

the next day 

it was 5:30 AM the rise and shine hour of the mornings, or the night, considering it Is winter. 

you were almost finished putting all your luggage back into your car, so you could make your way to your dorm. although you love home, your dorm spoke about you more than anything. you had a best friend for a roommate, who you missed quite painfully. 

the temperature only felt like it was dropping standing at 28 degrees fahrenheit.

your thick white turtleneck along with a large puffer coat, and some large black cargo pants, paired with thick black boots to keep your toes from getting frostbite.

the snow had stopped for a brief moment but you didn't plan on wearing a beanie, scared that it  may ruin your hair, the ginger lace front that you loved and kept safe.

finally closing the back of your car, before saying bye one more time to your mom.

"I'm gonna miss you y/n" she whispered into your ear, holding you so very tight 

"I'd miss me too" you joke making her chuckle "okay but seriously ma' im gonna miss you  to"

"I know, text me when you get back to your dorm ok baby?"

 feeling that same nervousness you always feel when leaving your mom, you give her a kiss on the cheek.

"yes ma'am" you respond while walking to your car,

did i preheat this bitch though'? 

getting in your car, you feel the cold air hit you worse than it did outside 

"damn" 

you already fucked your morning up.

preparing yourself for the long drive back, you hit that long playlist and drive off.

authors note 📝

what are we thinking y'all? this my first book and it's about the loml!!

this is really a filler chapter bcus ion know where to start 😭

chapters will be getting longer though on my dead homies

respectful constructive criticism is always appreciated!  

also not proof read ✌🏾  

heaven can wait