! . . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒂 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒓 ! ࿐ྂ
a   g r a n d   a r m y   f i c

( CHAPTER IX. 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒑𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉 )

" 𝑾𝑬𝑳𝑳 𝒀𝑶𝑼'𝑹𝑬 𝑵𝑶𝑻 𝑩𝑳𝑨𝑪𝑲 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯 𝑨 𝑵𝑰𝑵𝑬-𝑰𝑵𝑪𝑯 𝑫𝑰𝑪𝑲, 𝑨𝑹𝑬𝑵'𝑻 𝒀𝑶𝑼 ? " The small, unexpected sentence that had blurted out ever-so abruptly out of Joshua Lawrence's thin-lipped mouth as he exhaled the light gray smoke, attempting to increase his lack of feeling was quite the surprise for both of them. Evie, his now official ex-girlfriend was in shock, his news being assumingly the most flabbergasting yet totally understandable confession that she had heard in her sixteen years of life. Her usual exceedingly well-informed mind became dazed and confused as she tried to reminisce about their whole relationship, attempting to gather more pre-existing clues and hints that would've foreshadowed the boy's sexuality. She strived to conclude whether she was incredibly dense and self-involved or if he was simply spectacular at hiding it. It was difficult to gather enough evidence in her mind in such a small time period as an internally panicking Lawrence boy stood in front of her, finally processing his own words. The girl landed on his sudden need to participate in what-seemed-to-be abstinence after the end of the honeymoon period of their relationship when she knew the boy hadn't stepped inside a church his whole life━━ " Perhaps he had found God on his own time. " She had originally thought. Hell ! She wasn't one to judge one's spirituality but to deprive her of an active sex life ? That, she was not happy about. Nevertheless, Evie would soon find out that that was not the case.

As Evie Perez remained quiet, processing his divulgence, her glossy pink lips pressed together as it was one of her pay-no-mind-to habits, the boy's nonchalance was quickly vanishing into thin air, like a rush was put onto his high in order to end it faster. An unsettling feeling had begun to well deep inside of him, anxiety rising as paranoia found itself into his ebulliently erotic mind as he thought about all the possible outcomes of his unexpected and accidental coming out. The atmosphere had become dense and it was visible through his deep blue eyes. His brain was filled with trepidation, eyes not leaving Evie Perez as he tried to read her expressionless face, waiting for her delayed reaction. Joshua's imagination was running wild, going through the worst possible scenarios at rapid speed. He scratched his untamed, dirty blonde hair as he mentally wondered why he was stupid enough to spill out his darkest secret while fighting with Evie, the one that even he still held some unexplained shame of. Sadly, he knew that there was no going back now.

Joshua Lawrence did not even know why he would so casually spit out something so personal to the girl who was recalled as Grand Army's biggest gossip. Sure, he knew that the young Latina too was no Hetero but he also knew about her crippling addiction to petty High School vengeance and retaliation, especially when it came to her, let's face it, fairly shitty exes. Joshua's racing mind thought of Mike━━ Mikey Brown, her first real boyfriend from the dreadful freshman year, the year that her naïveness had diminished by a greater level.

Mikey Brown was an upperclassman, a senior to be precise that had quite the long and scandalous reputation attached to his incredibly douchey side smirk when it came to the girls at his High School. Obviously, when the older boy sparked interest on a younger, fourteen-year-old, more artless Evie, she was over the moon. She felt flattered as he ( unbeknownst to her ) manipulatively flirted with her at her locker in the ninth-grader area, complimenting the two, cute little dimples that would appear underneath both of her sugarplum-like cheeks when she smiled. His eyes would spark with mischief as he glanced at her with a look that indicated that he indeed knew that he was attractive. A sinful smirk was plastered upon Mikey's pale, sand-colored face as he effortlessly managed to score a date with the new, unknowing freshman. Sure, a part of her had wondered why one of the clearly more popular guys at school wouldn't go for a hotter senior girl but unfortunately, her happiness had clouded her judgment fairly.

To make a long story short, after a few dates had passed, the last one resulting in the loss of her virginity, Mikey's attentiveness to the girl went downwards as he started to avoid her for reasons she was not aware of. The at-the-time young Evie thought of all the possible reasons as to why he felt the annoying need to ignore her every move, especially as he had begged her to send revealing, topless photos of herself just a few days prior. Little did she know that the reasoning would soon be apprehended once she overheard the boy talking about her nudes, bragging about the many ones he had received as he waved them around his friends like some sort of sick trophy. He was excited about his high score on the little game that he and his male, swim team classmates were playing━━ One that oddly resembled the watered-down Senior Salute game from the St. Paul's school in New Hampshire that resulted in the sexual assault of a student. The next thing she knew, he was charged with child pornography charges as revenge for spreading them around the school grounds. Even if she did undeniably get the satisfaction of watching squirm for a little while, then getting a fair amount of money as a settlement, she still got labeled as the school's slut and quite frankly, that reputation stuck.

His thousand-mile-a-minute thoughts were cut short as he perceived a heartfelt embrace, arms being wrapped around his neck in a supportive manner. It was none other than his ex wrapping her frail arms around his skinny body in an attempt to assure the boy that his newly-outed secret, was safe with her. It was an odd feeling to finally sense the girl's stiff but protective and sincere squeeze as she rarely hugged anybody due to her trust issues and her cold personality. The only people that Joshua had seen the tan girl wrap her hands around in affection were Joey and George during the entirety of their doomed relationship. His arms enveloped themselves around Evie's back as a way to return the hug. He could get a whiff of the heavenly airy scent of her expensive lavender perfume that she would spritz upon her collar every single morning. A foreign aroma of smoldered fruit was also apparent but this time it was situated upon her jacket. The fragrance belonged to the E-cigarette that had been shoved inside of the pockets of her puffer jacket as the coil was burnt. It was an odd mixture of odors at first but Evie made it work.

Breaking the lovely embrace, Evie was finally ready to speak her mind on the situation and his sexuality : " Honestly, I understand why you didn't tell me, coming out is hard. Hell, I haven't even told my mom yet. I've treated you so badly and I'm probably not someone you like right now but Josh, even if we're not together, I love you so much and I have so much respect for you. " A soft smile made its way upon Evie's face, replacing her usual cold look. She took Joshua's hand in her's as she looked into his hazy blue eyes, waiting for some kind of read.

Joshua's high had diminished but was still very much apparent. He took a deep breath before taking a small sip of the leftover beer that was standing still directly in front of him. He was incredibly thankful that he had been blessed with such a good reaction in comparison to the many alternatives that he had overthought during their few minutes of pure silence. Still, he wanted to be alone in his depressing apartment before his brother and a certain twenty-something-year-old drug dealer would barge in, no doubt in an altered state. Jonah Lawrence would raid the refrigerator of its leftovers due to a sudden case of the munchies. Then, after binging the food that was left in their small home, the eldest Lawrence would pass out upon the worn-out sofa, mouth wide open, knowing that his younger brother would be checking for an accidental overdose every few minutes, Elijah would ask the adolescent junkie to pick his poison and his way of payment, capitalizing on his growing addiction and lack of dignity. This time would be different though. Joshua may be considered a drug-fiend just like the rest of his white trash relatives but he didn't want to result in prostitution once again to get his unhealthy fix.

" Thank you, Evie. We're good and I honestly just want to move on from our messy fucking relationship... " He paused, hesitation slightly taking over his pale body as he knew that he would soon regret the following scam once he'd be sober. " I want to take my brother to dinner and tell them too but I━━ I don't have the money... "

Evie's surprising generosity would soon be taken advantage of, unbeknownst to her as she saw it as a way to start fresh on their newfound friendship and put the toxicity of the relationship deep in the past. The closeted gay and the semi-closeted bisexual. She thought that the least they could do was start by confiding in one another. She prompted to hand him the money that would help the boy pay for the meal that would change his life forever, that would also finally make him feel free. The kind girl made her way towards the messy counter, cluttered utensils near the item she was specifically looking for : Her favorite black bag that she had placed there while she had barged in dozens of minutes prior. She unzipped the jet black buckle, wanting to find her loose cash quickly in order to see Joshua's signature warm smile that she missed so dearly. While rummaging through her big expensive bag, she had quite a bit of trouble finding the little leather wallet that she bring everywhere in cases of emergencies and her impulsively need to buy everything she likes. She found the glittery red-ish coral-colored lipgloss that she had lost months prior, the one she and Joey adored so very much. Evie also found a few accessory rings and a random lacy bra that she couldn't remember stuffing in. Finally, she found the small faux leather pouch where all her pocket money, her debit card, and other thin little cards with leftover gifted cash for specific stores were stored.

A crisp fifty-dollar bill was handed to Joshua from Evie's soft, perfectly manicured hands, an angelic look plastered across her naturally sunkissed surface as she waited for the smile that could light up the darkest of rooms. Perhaps that amount of cash was an exaggeration for the three-star restaurant she assumed he would eat at later but Evie knew about his struggles in the money department therefore she thought that a little extra generosity wouldn't hurt. His particular smile was heartwarming and extremely contagious, the smile that one could imagine would belong to a golden retriever if they were human. Fortunately, she got it quite quickly but not for the reasons she expected. He had spotted the rest of the cash inside of her trusty wallet, the cash that would come from her weekly allowance━━ The cash that the girl wasn't able to deposit due to the fact that she had forgotten her PIN number many months prior. A mere six-hundred and twenty dollars was barely stored away, right in front of an undercover junkie. Things were bound to go missing.

" Josh, I'm just gonna use your bathroom real quick ? " the Latina stated, knowing that it would be a good idea to go before leaving. She darted towards a rusty white door that blocked the way towards the small room a mere few feet away. This would be the perfect moment for a casual, robbery that he knew she would barely notice as the girl paid little to no attention to her own money as her upper-class privileges practically forbade the need to budget. As she banished inside of the cramped up little bathroom, Josh took the opportunity to smuggle his hands inside of the unattended black bag, carefully and gently refinding the little pouch that would surely not help his substance abuse. That moment, Evie would lose another hundred dollars. The boy had 150 dollars to feed the demon that always insisted he needed more and more drugs. He would be able to buy a galore of percocets and enough cocaine to tough him out for the night ( depending on Elijah's mood ) that could easily result in his death as the drugs were bound to be laced at some point, he was just lucky that he hadn't received the bad batch yet.

Joshua Lawrence was drowning upon the whispers of death itself and quite frankly, he knew it.

Around thirty seconds after the robbery between newly found friends━━ Exes, Evie was leaving. As she was about to close the old door behind her, she bumped into two young adults who were clearly about to enter the Lawrence residence. One who resembled Josh like two gumdrops, only having a little more facial hair upon his clearly out-of-it face as the other one fit the short description that had come out of Joshua's mouth during his coming out.

! . . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ 𝒉𝒐𝒘 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒂 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒓 ! ࿐ྂ
a   g r a n d   a r m y   f i c

( CHAPTER IX P.2. 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒏𝒄𝒆𝒑𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒕𝒉 )

𝑮𝑶𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑺𝑯𝑶𝑷𝑷𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑾𝑰𝑻𝑯𝑶𝑼𝑻 𝑻𝑯𝑬 𝑴𝑶𝑵𝑬𝒀 𝑻𝑶 𝑷𝑼𝑹𝑪𝑯𝑨𝑺𝑬 𝑨𝑵𝒀 𝑰𝑻𝑬𝑴𝑺 was a particular activity that most adolescents would partake after a long, tiresome day. For some unknown reason, going to a shopping center was deemed quite relaxing as every weekend, the inside of the big modern brick walls would be filled with loud, semi-annoying teenagers, their lack of money and determination to go through every store that could possibly be considered trendy. Alarms would go off due to the many series of attempted shoplifting, the troublemakers wanting to test the waters and aim to steal shirts and jeans instead of the typical lipsticks, nail polishes and thongs from the girliest of stores, thus resulting in the numerous excuses that would retort out of their nicotine-sodden lungs, such as : " Bro, I honestly don't know how the fuck that got in there. " while the rent-a-cops would search their zipped up purses.

" My calves look dope ! " Dominique Pierre spoke, her tone laced with confidence as she posed, right leg upon a white footstool, admiring the fierce leather boots upon her feet as Tor Sampson took multiple pictures, undoubtedly planning to publish them all on his many social media accounts.

As per usual, this becoming a daily rootine for Bre McAdams, she admired her natural beauty from afar, attempting to find the right compliment that would not result in a mental facepalm and a confused look shot from her dear best friend. Nevertheless, it was difficult for the awestruck girl to look away from Dom's indisputable charm and stunningness as her homespun, woolen burgundy bonnet matched the many brown colors of her long, small box braids, the tresses waving around at any given movement due to its thinness at the bottom, the gold string that she had herself plaited shining just a little under the bright white lights from the shoestore they had been hanging in. Bre McAdams could feel the fuzziness in her heart every time a conversation would spark between them━━ Which was often as the two spent their days together.

At first, the curly-haired Filipino thought that it was simply friendship, her love for the mesmerizing black girl being simply made from the feeling of safeness that she sensed due to the fact that Dominique was a good person, a great person, the kind of person that you would always want by your side due to their ability to comfort you with a simple caring touch. Bre lived her average life well, the best she could after the horrid loss that no child should've had gone through at such a young age. She had enjoyed the lack of odd regards that had come from her friend once she had so emotionally revealed the reason as to why she never grew up with a mother. The feeling that she sensed that day as she reflected her deepest most vulnerable self was a feeling that had never left as it had jumpstarted her growing love for the caring girl. That was the moment that she had confirmed her love within herself, the denial of her true identity vanishing like mist.

Behind Bre's dark makeup and cold exterior, belonged a passionate heart, a heart that felt her own emotions so deeply that she found it was best to cover it up and build a wall that would match the way the other students perceived her. Dom never let Bre close down around her, the girl encouraging her to open up even when she herself had trouble with that concept, to show the other's just how appearances can be incredibly misleading, to watch them as they realized that one should only see what is within the heart. The feeling of validation that the McAdams girl received from the girl that had so accidentally stolen her heart made her realize why they indeed called it a crush.

It could be crushing to hear the response of the other, whether imagined or reality after gathering the courage to speak the truth about their feelings. The actuality was that the love that Bre felt for Dom had been self-inflicted due to the amount of kindness, hope and sense of warmth that the girl had generously given. Everyone should have been able to experience those emotions from a family member beforehand but unfortunately, those sentiments were given too late. Perhaps the affection that she held for the Pierre girl would've gone to Evie if she had met her after she understood the concept of death, the two being children when meeting. Maybe if Evie could find a way to unlock her frozen feelings━━ The sentimentality that only came out while she was under the influence. At least there she had a knowing chance as Evie was very open about her liking of girls while Dom had no prior indication that she too had a thing for the female species. The best thing that Bre could do without the fifty-fifty percentage of getting hurt would be to offer her kindness as well.

" You look hot, girl ! " She complimented, attempting to remain casual as she shoved her feelings aside...

! . . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐞'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 ࿐ྂ
3305 ! the way i wanted to write more but i had no inspo🙄.
sorta hate this chapter sorta don't but i'm not rewriting it and if you see a grammar mistake or something, stay quiet but i'm too tired.

act one is almost over, only a few ( 2-3 ? ) chapters left until the cab scene and evie & cassie kiss😌i listened to mitski on a loop while writing this so expect heartbreak and shit because ocs can't be happy for that long ;).

act two will start off directly after joey gets r*ped but i'm not sure about act three yet. anyways, i'm switching it up since y'all dry asf with the comments. 20 comments and votes for chapter ten because it's all about cassie and evie.