⚠️ EATING DISORDER AND SERIOUS SELF HATE/SELF HARM ARE MENTIONED HEAVILY IN THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK. IF YOU EXPERIENCE ANY OF THIS, JUST KNOW I CARE FOR YOU AND HOPE THE BEST FOR YOU ALONG YOUR JOURNEY :)⚠️

Ray✨: I'm bored y'all

Griffin😈: then go find something to do

Ray✨: I am doing something. I'm sitting.

Griffin😈: go away

One new text from Payton🙈

Payton🙈: are you okay?

Ray✨: yeah why?

Payton🙈: just wanted to check in

Ray✨: thanks

Payton🙈: no problem

Ray POV (first POV of the book y'all!)
I smile and put my phone on the nightstand, plugging it in. I get a whiff of something. Bacon. A wave of nausea passes over me. You're fat, Ray. Seriously, stop eating.
I gag, then quickly run into the bathroom. I stick two fingers down my throat and keep hitting my gag spot until I throw up. I do this a few more times before flushing the toilet. I brush my teeth again, feeling disgusting. That's because you are disgusting, Ray.
   I slide down the wall, tears rolling down my cheeks silently as my throat burns. This is disgusting. I'm disgusting. I'm fat, for one thing. I'm not bulimic-I don't binge-but I make myself sick because how am I still this fat? Who would like a fat eating disorder kid? No one. I need to try harder.
   I cry harder at these thoughts. My dad hates me because I'm fat. Nobody likes me. Why am I even here? Why am I even alive?
   I walk back into my room and dig around my bag quickly, finding my small box. I take it back to the bathroom and sit down with it. Opening it, I take out my blade.
   I cut into my arms and thighs. I lean my head back against the wall, breathing in and out, trying to calm myself down before I have a panic attack at someone else's house. It takes a few minutes, but then I look back down and see I'm covered in blood.
   I wet a washcloth, wiping up the blood. I use the towel from my shower to hold against my cuts until they stop bleeding. They do, eventually, so I put the bandaids on my thighs and gauze around my arms.
   I clean the blood up off the floor and put everything away. I pull my phone off the charger and see I've gotten over twenty texts from Payton and a few in the group with a lot of them in it. I smile and start reading through Payton's texts.

Payton🙈: hey wanna FaceTime? I'm bored

Payton🙈: not that you're just sometime to talk to when I'm bored I think you're really cool

Payton🙈: so that's a no on the FaceTime?

Payton🙈: okay I think I'm probably being annoying now

Payton🙈: mom is probably feeding you and that's why you aren't responding

Payton🙈: Ray?

Payton🙈: hey ray?

Payton🙈: raaaaaaaaaaaay?

Payton🙈: okay I'll chill I'm being weird

Payton🙈: actually I'm just being annoying

Payton🙈: if you don't want to talk to me that's fine just say so

Payton🙈: you good?

Payton🙈: could I please be put into your good graces and get a response?

Payton🙈: just let me know you're okay

Payton🙈: Noen says you probably think I'm a creep

Payton🙈: I pinky promise I'm not

Payton🙈: the guys request a response in the group chat

Payton🙈: heyo you there?

Payton🙈: this is not funny to ignore me like seriously I'm getting scared

Payton🙈: I'm calling my mom

Payton🙈: she said you're in the guest room and you're probably asleep and to leave you alone

Payton🙈: that would make sense so I'll stop annoying you and let you sleep. Just send me a text when you wake up to let me know that you're ok

Ray✨: I'm fine Payton, thanks for checking. I was just a little occupied. Will respond to group now.

Idiots+New Person

Griffin😈: sup

Sam🏄‍♂️: hey

Josh😇: does anybody know what happened to ray?

Griffin😈 has changed group chat name to "Idiots+Ray"

Josh😇: so you can change the group name but not respond to my text? Really?

Griffin😈: ask Payton

Josh😇: Payton?

Payton🙈: it's a secret

Josh😇: I know you didn't kidnap her so it can't be that big of a secret

Anthony🐛: well that's the only way you could get a girl is to kidnap her

Payton🙈: you are just weird

Chase H😷: he's not wrong

Noen😽: ray you good?

Ray✨: I'm fine and no I did not get kidnapped by Payton you weirdos

Ray✨: but thanks for the concern yall

Jaden🎤: I think we were halfway to filing you as a missing person

Jaden🎤: but like for real why are anthony and griffin and Payton so calm bout this like you could've been missing what do they know that we don't?

Ray✨: they knew I was safe and not missing?

Noen😽: why didn't you tell us you were safe too then?

Anthony🐛: safe is a loose term here

Ray✨: shut up

Griffin😈: shut up

Payton🙈: for real buddy zip it

Anthony🐛: SORRY SORRY SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO BRING THE FACETIME UP

Anthony🐛: I'm officially the biggest idiot

Payton🙈: yes you are

Ray✨: how do you know bout that?

Ray✨: Payton?

Payton🙈: don't kill me they were sitting out on the balcony with me

Sam🏄‍♂️: should I know what's going on?

Keith😴: I'm literally just getting here who is the new number and why are y'all mad

Chase H😷: that's ray and it's tea so go through and read the texts and then be confused with the rest of us while we wait for Payton to get murdered

Chase H😷: hey ray if you see this that's the other chase

Keith😴: okay sure buddy

Keith😴 has added Ray✨ as a contact

Griffin😈: i would like to plead innocence here ray like seriously please forgive me

Noen😽: we care bout you ray please let us know you are okay

Ray✨ has started a chat with Noen😽

Ray✨: I'm okay Noen but let Payton know I'm leaving his mom's house and that I'm blocking his and griffin and Anthony's numbers so tell them not to bother messaging me for a while. You can tell the rest of them if you want

Noen😽: okay. Just text me if you need anything at all

Noen😽: I'll be here for you

Ray✨: I really do appreciate it Noen. I'm glad I've got to talk to you. You're an amazing person and I really wish I could've got to meet you.

Noen😽: ray? What does that mean? Are you okay?

Ray✨: tell them I'm sorry

CLIFFHANGER??? I'll try to update again soon because I feel like I've got this story somewhat back on track. PLEASE VOTE AND LEAVE COMMENTS AND LIKE RECOMMEND TO YOUR FRIENDS?