In the morning I left Mehmet's chamber feeling happy because the kiss we exchanged yesterday was sweet and beautiful, something I had never experienced in my life, a feeling that can never be described in words, he was very kind and kept talking to me until I fell asleep and when I woke up I found that he had left for his work and left me sleeping with a small letter next to me

[I didn't want to disturb you because you are sleeping peacefully, so I will put a small kiss on your cheek and leave. Take care of yourself]

While I was walking back to the harem I felt a hand covering my mouth, then I was dragged to a secluded corner and I was unable to even scream.

"Stop resisting" said a man who looked like a guard "I was sent here to warn you"

I opened my eyes in shock but I was still unable to speak because of his hand covering my mouth.

"Those who sent you are sending you their regards" he raised his eyebrow slyly "and telling you that you should do what they told you as soon as possible" He winked at me and added in a sharp tone "You know what will happen, There's no need for me to remind you"

As soon as he finished speaking, he pulled his hand away. I raised my finger "This is the last time you touch me, you filthy bastard" I pushed him away with my hand to pass, then said "There's no need to threaten me, I know very well what I should do"

He nodded "That's good, beautiful"

I felt angry "Don't say that, you idiot!" I took a deep breath as I stepped back a little "I want you to find me poison or something, it will be much easier this way"

He smiled in a strange way "Okay, I will try"

I gave him a deadly look then continued on my way feeling nervous as if my world was about to collapse, I know very well why I am here but for a moment I felt like I was in a fairy tale with Mehmet and now this warning brought me back to the bitter reality, there are people whose lives depend on me so I will not sit here and allow myself to fall in love and let them die.

I tried to calm myself down then entered the harem where I found everyone eating breakfast, I didn't want to talk to anyone but the most annoying voice and the person whose face I can't stand to see stopped me, yes it's Eylem.

I sighed deeply then turned to her "I really don't have time for you so just stay away from me"

She smiled sarcastically as she approached me "As if I'm happy to talk to you" She came close to my ear then said in a low voice "I'm forced to do this but I promise you that I will take revenge on you soon"

I didn't understand anything, what is this crazy woman trying to get at!

"I'm sorry Mary" she said loudly in front of everyone "I apologize for what I did a few weeks ago, and I don't want the enmity between us to continue"

I was shocked to hear her apologize in front of everyone why she would do this, but I wasn't surprised when I heard her add

"I will become a sultana so I don't want any enmity with anyone no matter who they are, my position doesn't allow me to do that" she said with a smile as she passed her hand over her stomach.

Well she's trying to look nice but she just threatened me near my ear, and said that she was forced, maybe it was Hürrem Sultan.

I smiled as I looked at her then continued on my way to my room but before I even sat down I found a strange girl entering my room "Mary Hatun"

I raised my eyebrows in surprise "Who are you?"

She smiled as she raised her hand towards the door "Come with me, Safiye Sultan wants to meet you"

I pointed to myself in shock "Me?"

She nodded "Yes"

I nodded hesitantly then followed her, I really don't understand anything, what are these strange things happening this morning!

After a very short distance we reached Safiye Sultan's chamber, as soon as I took one step inside I could tell that her chamber is not as huge as Hürrem Sultan but if I could put it in one word it would be Magnificent, this woman really amazes me.

I bowed before the Sultana without raising my head until I heard her say "Good morning Hatun"

I raised my head as I looked at her elegant appearance, I will say it for the tenth time this woman belongs to an European palace "Good morning Sultana"

She smiled a little as she sat down elegantly "You must be wondering why you are here"

I moved my head a little trying to look respectful "Still it is nice to see you Sultana"

She was silent for a while then said calmly "I saw you crying yesterday as you were leaving Hürrem's chamber"

I sighed a little and did not know what I was supposed to say "Yes Sultana"

"I can see that your relationship with her is not good at all, and many other things...I have ears everywhere in this palace" She raised her eyebrow a little "I want to warn you"

Although I was still absorbing her words, I was shocked when I saw her standing, I did not know what I should do or say, I lowered my eyes and remained silent.

"I can see that you respect me" she moved a little closer to me "and everyone who is next to me..I do the same for them" she put her hand under my face then raised it so our eyes met, I can really see a strong history in her eyes she looks like a very wise woman "but there is something strange about you"

I cleared my throat feeling nervous and the words barely left my lips "what do you mean Sultana?"

She moved her hand "really I don't care if I want.. I will know anyway" she smiled then turned and went back to her place "be careful Hürrem and her daughter and that little idiot Eylem are planning to get rid of you"

My eyes widened and I quickly asked "really!"

She sat up and shook her head "Yes, be careful..." She raised her eyebrow "Remind me of your name again"

Despite the tension that overwhelmed me, I tried to answer with a smile "Mary, Sultana"

She smiled a little "Nice name, but..." She paused a little as if thinking "I think it's time for you to get a new name since you've become the şehzade's favorite and it seems you have a good future considering your many enemies"

Indeed, she speaks the truth. When your enemies hold significant value, it is clear that you are a genuine threat to them... Yet, I fear I will ultimately disappoint this Sultana, for I see no future for myself in this place.

I shook my head with a smile "Whatever you see fit, Sultana"

She lowered her eyes and I knew she was thinking of a name for me.

She looked at me and said calmly "The name Nurgül suits you" She smiled as if she was looking at my features well "It means the shining rose, and you are really shining like the sunlight"

I smiled without realizing it, the name sounds charming and beautiful, well I have to pretend that I am really a part of this harem until the end.

"Thank you, Sultana" I approached her and I bowed, then took a small piece of her dress and placed a kiss on it.

I spent the whole day in my room thinking about Eylem's apology and her bad intentions towards me, then my meeting with Safiye Sultan and her talk, her warning might be right or she might just want me on her side to use me against Hürrem Sultan.

Everyone now knows that the prince is interested in me, so everyone expects that I am the one who will give birth to his next son, this is something really disappointing, I wish I had met him under other circumstances.

And here I remembered the threats of that idiot, they will continue to send idiots to threaten me because they know that I am weak and I have no other solutions.

The door opened and both Ayşe and Alice entered.

"The lonely lover" Alice approached me "So what happened, the prince disappeared for a month and then suddenly you spent last night with him!"

Before I could answer her, I heard Ayşe saying "Love, girl, it's love" She winked at me and laughed "You really get what you want"

I didn't understand what she meant so I raised my eyebrows "What do you mean?"

Alice laughed a little "You wanted Eylem to apologize, right?" She started clapping her hands "You are really smart girl, you broke her pride in front of everyone"

I stood up and I really felt like my head was going to explode "I really don't understand what you girls are talking about!"

Ayse's eyes widened "So you don't know!" She pulled me by the hand and then we sat down "From what I heard everyone saying, the prince is the one who forced Eylem to apologize to you in front of everyone"

Oh I'm really shocked now for the thousandth time today! So Mehmet knew very well that I was upset because she wasn't punished, so he did this... I really want to hug him now I know I should be happy but I don't want him to be nice to me because that will make me very weak and I won't be able to carry out my mission.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of the door opening and then Fahriye Kalfa appeared through it "At this point I am really your servant, Mary"

I shook my head "By mentioning this, my name is now Nurgül" I looked at her in surprise "Why did you say that you are my servant?"

I felt that they were all looking at me in surprise then I quickly Ayşe asked "Did you change your name?"

I sighed a little "No it's not me, it's Safiye Sultan"

Now they seemed to be more and more shocked "Damn! What about Hürrem Sultan" Fahriye Kalfa said as she put her hand over her mouth.

Alice put her hand on my shoulder "You idiot, don't involve yourself in a feud that lasted for years even before you were born"

I felt nauseous "I really don't involve myself in anything don't worry" I looked at Fahriye Kalfa impatiently "What's wrong Fahriye"

My question seemed to get her out of her shock and she said "şehzade Mehmet is waiting for you in the garden"

I raised my eyebrows, at this time? It's almost night, that's what came to my mind but I quickly stood up.

"I'll be late because of you" I took a small mirror and looked at my hair "Do I look good?!"

Alice nodded then came closer and adjusted my dress "Okay everything is perfect, go"

When I left, the first thing I did was head to the palace kitchen, now I have to turn off my heart and use my mind, I have no excuses.

I entered and I was watching everyone there, I talked to them about short and stupid topics because they love the news of the harem and without anyone noticing I took a small knife, put it under my dress and left towards the garden.

I walked slowly trying to find him until I felt a hand behind my shoulder and before I screamed I knew it was him... Mehmet.

"You scared me" I said as I put my hand over my heart after I turned to him.

He looked a little worried "I'm really sorry I didn't mean to" He put his hand on my cheek "Are you okay?"

I'm really not okay, what I'm about to do will kill me.

I tried to fake a little smile "Yes, it's just I've always been afraid of the dark"

He smiled a little and said in a calm voice "Don't be afraid, I'm with you" His voice and words really pierced my heart, making me want to hold his hand and scream that this man is mine and I really want to be by his side for the rest of my life.

Without realizing it, I found myself hugging him without saying anything.

He ran his hand through my hair "I wanted to take a little walk under the stars with you" He moved away a little "Just you and me"

I moved my head while holding his hand "That's really a good idea" I started walking beside him and I felt like I was going to collapse and cry at any moment, he trusts me and doesn't know that I'm going to take his soul in a little while.

After a long silence, I looked at him and said "I really wanted to thank you"

He turned to me "Why?"

I lowered my eyes "You made her apologize to me" I sighed a little "You really don't know how important it is to me"

He smiled then stopped walking "I know, that's why" He ran his fingers over my cheek "I wanted you to be happy and to know how important you are to me"

I moved my head with a smile as I looked into his eyes then we started walking again, this time I deliberately took a few steps back while he was in front of me putting his hands behind his back and telling me a lot of things related to his work. I turned to make sure that no one was there then I put my hand on the knife that I had hidden well under my dress, I took a deep breath trying to hold back my tears then I pulled the knife out a little.

I felt the tension taking over my entire body, physically and mentally of course, I was very close all that separated me from succeeding in my mission was stabbing him a few times.

"I talked to my father about something very important" he said without looking at me, that's what pulled me out of my thoughts, God, I can't do this, he didn't even do anything wrong, his voice is making me weak, why am I so bad...

I hid the knife again and tried to pretend to be calm "What is it?"

He stopped walking then sighed deeply, it must be something very important, he turned to me then said "About going to Manisa"

I feel my hands shaking, I don't understand anything that's happening now, I quickly said "All I know is that they're trying to protect you"

He nodded in agreement "I know, that's what everyone says, but I have to go, I wasn't supposed to spend my whole life here"

I was silent for a while thinking about his words, he must feel like he's not good for anything because they keep protecting him like he's a princess or something... I raised my head and held his hand "And what happened?"

He started to get annoyed and said "The same thing he says every time, he will think about it"

I moved closer to him "I hope you get what you want and I hope you nothing bad will happen to you"

He looked at my eyes in surprise "Why are you talking as if you won't be with me" He raised my hand and placed a gentle kiss on it "You will stay with me whether here or there, whether I'm a şehzade or a sultan" He placed another kiss on my forehead "I really want you to be my sultana, and to give me many children, Mary"

His words made my feelings change, I want the same thing but I can't get it.

I put my hand on his cheek "I will be with you through thick and thin" I smiled "I promise you that" I wanted to change the subject so I said in a joking way "And my name is no longer Mary"

He looked at me in surprise "Why?"

I placed a kiss on his cheek "Safiya Sultan changed my name to Nurgül"

He raised his eyebrow "Safiya Sultan?" He smiled slightly "Do you know what your name means?"

I nodded "Yes, the shining rose, she said that I am really shining"

He took my face in his hands "It really suits you" He smiled in a charming way "You are the light that illuminates my path" As soon as he finished his sweet words, he placed his lips on mine and began to kiss me in a way that was even sweeter than his words.