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─── ❛ 𝖻𝗈𝗇𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗌𝖾𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗈𝗇

𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐓 𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐂𝐇 𝐌𝐄 𝐍𝐎𝐖 ₊˚.༄𖥸 ── 
𑁍₊𓄹 -- ❪ 𝐒𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍   𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 ❫. 𓄹
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╰ ✦ 𝖻𝗈𝗇𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗌𝖾𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗈𝗇╭ ᘒ

Adeline wanted to go help Rick and everyone, but she couldn't. She needed to stay back, with Madelyn and look after Alexandria—Judith.

Adeline knew had to use a gun, she had killed walkers. But, she hadn't killed humans. She probably thought she'd have a nervous break down when shit needed to be done.

But she had to. She had to grow a back bone. If she wanted to survive, she had to kill the living...that's the only way to live. Adeline needed to kill the living in order to be alive.

But for now, she needed to stay back at Alexandria. Help out when it's needed. She knew her mother wouldn't want her out fighting, not when she wasn't there. Jaycee had faith in Adeline, but she didn't want Jaycee to return without a daughter.

Adeline sat on the porch of her house, Judith in her arms as she played peak-a-boo. The blonde child giggled, clapping her hands together.

"Carols recipe for these cookies are amazing." Adeline turned to Madelyn, who walked out with a plate of cookies, one in her free hand. "Want one?" Madelyn held out the plate, making Adeline grab two, giving one to Judith.

"Thank you." Adeline smiled as Judith nibbled on the cookie, looking around with a smile. "Do you think she's okay?" Adeline suddenly asked as Madelyn sat down beside her. "My mom?"

"Of course she is. Your mother is a badass, I'm sure she's heard that a lot." Madelyn grinned as Adeline let out a chuckle, nodding her head.

"Yeah. I just hope she's okay. God knows what being in there longer than a day is like. Me and Carl saw only half of it." Adeline breathed out, shaking her head as she ran her hand through Judith's hair. "But, she's got Dwight and Bellamy. Hell, I don't think negan will kill her."

"Why?" Madelyn frowned as Adeline shrugged her shoulders.

"He's, like, obsessed with her. I mean, look what he did to Sasha." Adeline frowned slightly as Madelyn bit her tongue. "Right hand woman? He ain't gonna kill her." Adeline shook her head as Madelyn nodded her hers.

"You think the rest are okay? Going to one of their outposts?" Madelyn asked as she ran a hand through her hair.

"Yeah, they'll be fine." Adeline nodded her head, puffing out her cheeks to make Judith laugh.

"I feel useless, you know. Sitting here, eating cookies whilst they're fighting for their lives—our lives." Madeline let out a deep sigh as Adeline nodded her head.

"I agree. We aren't ready. We both have never killed a person before, but if we want to win this war, we're gonna have to." Adeline explained as Madelyn winced slightly.

"Yeah. Yeah, we are."

Walkers groans filled up the room, Jaycee running a hand through her hair as she kept her eyes closed. "Your friend Rick is an asshole." Negan spoke to Gabriel, who sat on the opposite side of the room.

"You're an asshole." Gabriel shot back as negan grinned.

"Yeah. I am." Negan said, proudly. "But he's gonna get people killed." He let out a sigh. Jaycee kept her eyes closed as she rested her chin on her arms.

"By you." Gabriel told him, keeping his back faced his way.

"See, I killed the Widows husband and the ginger. But I didn't get them killed." Negan said as he looked over to Gabriel. Jaycee bit down on her tongue, hard. "That was your boy, Rick. Big difference." Gabriel re-adjusted himself as negan continued. "You know, I saw you stop for that Gregory idiot. You were there. You saw the whole thing. You heard his little speech. Why would you stop for that bearded prick?"

"What I fear is a fruitless death." Gabriel said as Jaycee frowned, opening one eye as she looked over at him.

"He's religious." Jaycee replied, closing her eyes once again. "Doesn't want to do bad in gods eye."

Negan let out a chuckle at her words, looking over at Gabriel. "Jesus Christ. You got to be kiddin' me. He split on your creepy little ass. The point of your life would be saving that dickhead?"

Gabriel shook his head. "That wouldn't be it. There had to be some reason I did what I did." He breathed out, lifting his head up. "Maybe this is the reason."

"What?" Negan asked him, tilting his head.

"I think...I'm here to take your confession." Gabriel said as Jaycee breathed out, lifting her head to lean on the wall.

"God, if you exist, kill me." Jaycee muttered to herself, opening her eyes as she looked up.

Negan let out another chuckle, shaking his head as he looked over at Gabriel. "We can wait it out a little bit, see if my people can figure something out. One thing that is sure as ass...if my people think I'm dead..." He breathed out. "A lot of folks are gonna die in there."

Gabriel frowned at his words. "Why?" Gabriel simply asked.

"Listen to me. I don't have shit to confess. Except maybe the fact that I rubbed one out right where you're sitting just to calm down a bit." Negan grinned as Jaycee grimaced, scrunching up her face.

"Don't worry, he didn't." Jaycee shook her head as her face was still scrunched up. "If he did I seriously would have killed myself by now." She turned to negan, who just grinned.

Negan then turned back to Gabriel. "Let me ask you something. Why'd you become a priest?" Negan asked him.

"I love god, and I love people." Gabriel simply said as he looked over at Negan. "I wanted to bring them together. To help people through their difficult times." He breathed in. "To help them through their weaknesses."

"Well, look at that. That's my thing." Negan grinned at Gabriel. "I like to help people through their weaknesses, too. Been doing it one way or another my whole life."

"How do you help people—"

Negan quickly cut Gabriel off. "You want to know why people are gonna start dying in there? Because I'm not there to stop it."

Then, Negan started to whistle. Jaycee wanted to headbut a wall. Being trapped in a room with negan isn't something she would call amazing.

Bellamy sat beside Dwight, his hands on the table. His father and Jaycee could be dead, eaten by walkers.

"We have to assume Negan's dead." Regina spoke up as Bellamy looked up at her.

"I'm negan." Simon was quick to say, shrugging his shoulders. "And as I understand it, everyone in this room is. Now, I realise there's a lot of stress in the air...but just to clarify, are you saying you're someone else, Regina?"

"No."

"Good." Simon nodded his head as he pointed at Regina.

"We should send the fence crew out. Grab a few others, we get forty workers, standing back to back. We get them out with the pipes, they clear a path...just enough for a small team-"

"Inadequate." Eugene shook his head as he cut Regina off.

"What?" Regina tilted her head at Eugenes words.

"The numbers you suggest aren't adequate. Given the current SRO density of the herd surrounding is, forty workers armed with melee weapons in the formation you propose would be overcome, closed in on, and macked upon within a few minutes." Eugene explained as Bellamy didn't understand a single word.

"Yeah. Thats right." Regina nodded her head. "We use the workers as a distraction to get a small team past the herd. They can want the outposts and then come back with the Fat lady."

"Add to the approach's slim chances of success, it's likely the play would lead to widespread unrest, pitting the workers against the soldiers when we're running out of food and fuel, upsetting our already precarious Apple cart." Eugene explained how her plan was dumb.

Regina leaned forward as she spoke. "Maybe all we need to do is put you out there, Eugene. Maybe it would motivate the answer man to come up with a solution."

"Regina, he's right." Dwight spoke up, looking over at the woman. "The workers have the numbers, and we need to keep them on our side."

"We need to keep them in line." Simon told them from the head of the table.

"Even if we get a few of ours out and somehow clear the crowd...they have snipers all around the building." Gavin then spoke up, holding onto his walkie. "So right now, let's deal with the other part. Someone in here made everything out there happen." He pointed to everyone in the room. Dwight and Bellamy shared a small look. "We're having our little crisis-management meeting about the rebellion in Alexandria, us three outpost heads, and that's when they pile this crap on us?" He then slapped the table. "That's when they cut us off? Come on. They knows all and sees all."

Gavin continued his little speech. "Sometimes it doesn't take a gun. The right kind of rat...can kill plenty of people...with just some talk."

"It has to be that Alexandria woman." Regina spat as Bellamy raised a brow.

"She hasn't left the sanctuary once. Both Negan and Simon has kept a close eye on her. Besides, she went out there to help him." Bellamy pointed out as he pointed outside. "None of us did."

"She could have killed him as soon as she reached him." Regina challenged him once again.

"But it's not gonna be us." Dwight quickly changed the conversation, sitting up as he sent Bellamy a look, who leaned back in his chair. "And it doesn't have to be the workers."

"Dwight, you got to face reality here." Simon told him with a sigh.

"No, Simon, we keep what's ours and we don't give up a damn thing." Dwight argued against the idea. "We get out. And I don't want to hear any backbiting or pissing or moaning from you two." He stood up and pointed at Gavin and Regina. "You got a problem with that, come at me. Hmm?" Dwight tilted his head as they stayed silent. "You can't lead the saviours out of here, I will." He then pointed at Simon and sat back down.

Simon slowly moved towards Dwight, leaning down and getting in his face. He then grinned, patting his hand. "Yes, my boy. Yes!" He cheered. "And...we're gonna find that subhuman coward that did this to us..." he looked over at Eugene. "And we're gonna kill him very slowly in front of everyone here over the course of a few very long days."

"You helped the weak before this?" Gabriel spoke after the awkward silence.

"Kids." Negan said as Jaycee turned to him, raising a brow. "You don't show them the way, well, they turn out like garbage. Little assholes become great big ones...so you show them the way."

"You were a teacher?" Jaycee tilted her head as negan turned to her.

"Gym coach." He replied as Jaycee bit back a laugh, slowly nodding her head. "What?"

"No, nothing." She shook her head, lowering it as she bit down on her tongue. "Just didn't take you for a gym coach, 's all."

Negan grinned at her words before turning back to Gabriel. "People are weak." He continued his conversation.

"Everyone?" Gabriel asked as negan nodded his head.

"Everyone."

"You're weak." Gabriel nodded at Negan, who grinned. "Killing the innocent."

"Right and goddamn wrong." Negan smiled at Gabriel's words. "I'm weak, but me 'killing the innocent'? That ain't why, Gabey." He let out a sigh as he stood up, going to stand beside Jaycee.

Then, a walkers hand snapped through the boards that were weak, Jaycee looking over at the hole. "We'll wait a little bit longer...see if my people can pull it together." Negan said, once again.

"Why are you weak?" Gabriel asked him, looking up at Negan.

"That's the wrong question." Negan shook his head, looking down at Gabriel. "It is how I am weak. You see, the thing is, I am also strong. Everyone is a mix. You can use your weaknesses to drive your strength, and obviously, I am strong as shit. I took this place, and it was a damn free-for all..." negan explained.

"A loose confederation of assholes, an army made up of gangs of animals, and I brought it all together. The last guy that was in charge...he wasn't in charge of shit. He allowed people to be weak. I don't." Negan shook his head.

"I make them strong, which makes this world strong. You're gonna see, Gabey. See, I'm gonna make you my new special project. Gonna make you nice and strong, too." He grinned as he looked forward. "We're gonna find your special purpose. Like we did for our Jaycee." He grinned down at Jaycee, who was looking over at Gabriel. "Hell, yes, we are."

"I'm strong." Gabriel looked away from negan. "I've killed." He turned back to negan. "I was at the satellite station. I was part of that. So was she." Jaycee squeezed her eyes shut at his words.

"Oh. Then you killed me people while they were sleeping." Negan titled his head as he moved away from Jaycee and in front of Gabriel. "Well, look at you, swinging your dick.  Sure, Gabe." He looked down at him. "That's strong. But that's not what I'm talking about."

"Tell me how you're weak." Was all Gabriel said as he looked up at negan. "We might be dead soon. You may be dead. Wouldn't you want to confess before all that happens?" He asked negan, looking at the walkers hand. "Wouldn't you want absolution before that? Forgiveness?" Gabriel then stood up as Jaycee watched the two, leaning on the door. "Costs you nothing more than saying the truth aloud. You don't think you have anything to confess? People you've killed?"

"I haven't killed anyone that didn't need it." Negan shrugged his shoulders as he stared at Gabriel.

"The workers you treat like slaves." Gabriel pointed out.

"It's an economy. Some people win, some people lose, but no one's a slave, no one's going hungry, and you couldn't say that before all this." Negan simply said.

"Carl and Adeline told us about your wives." Gabriel said as Jaycee's brows furrowed. She didn't get told that, she hadn't even seen these women. "The women you pressured into marrying you? How you told them you wanted to do the exact same thing to Jaycee."

"What?" Jaycee raised a brow as she slowly stood up, the pair looking over at her before going back to their conversation.

"Every one of those ladies made a choice." Negan said as he turned around, back facing Gabriel.

"Was there a first?" Gabriel asked as Jaycee shook her head. Bellamy had told Jaycee a few parts of his childhood, and his mother, because Bellamy trusted Jaycee.

"Gabriel, I suggest you shut up and sit down." Jaycee wanted him, not for Negan's sake, but for Gabriel's.

But Gabriel didn't stop. "One before all of this? A wife you promised to have and to hold, forsaking all others?" Gabriel drew closer towards negan, who raised his bat. "One you told that lie to?"

"Lucille, give me the strength." Negan muttered before Gabriel made his move, grabbing the gun from Negan's waistband and shooting it, but missing as it skimmed Jaycee's arm.

She let out a hiss of pain as negan pushed Gabriel out of the way, Gabriel quickly grabbing onto Jaycee and pulling them both into the other room and closing the door behind them.

"Why am I always getting shot?" Jaycee groaned as she held onto her arm, looking at Gabriel with wide eyes. "Congrats, you've personally signed our deaths on a certificate." She said through gritted teeth.

"All right, Gabe! No one's coming for us. You took your shot...shots." Negan said through the other room. Jaycee squeezed her eyes shut as she leaned her head again the wall. "It's time to go."

"We need to go, Gabriel." Jaycee breathed out as she moved to rip a bit of her shirt, wrapping it around her arm with a hiss. "We're dead if not."

"No." Was all Gabriel said as Jaycee scoffed, bitting down on her tongue.

"Well, shit."

Jaycee continued to lean on the wall, putting pressure on her arm. She was glad the bullet skimmed her arm and not actually go in.

"We have Lucille to help us get to the Sanctuary." Negan stared speaking from the other room. "We have that gun, and the one around Jaycee. We should use them. Most importantly, we have each other. People are a resource. We make it inside, we live."

Jaycee looked down at Gabriel with a sigh, giving him a look, which he ignored. "Goddamn it, Gabriel." Jaycee muttered to herself, running her other hand though her hair. "Move from the door."

"We can take a chance, we can 'gut up...'" Jaycee cringed at Negan's words, knowing exactly what he meant. "Play dead ones across the courtyard. Or I can just kill you, and get jaycee. But that is not what I want." Negan told them. "What I want is for you to work with me. That is all I ever want."

Jaycee looked down at Gabriel, who held the gun in his hand. "I've killed before, but that's not my gravest sin. I locked my congregation out of my church when this all just started. I listened to them die...as I cowered. I failed them." Gabriel let out a shaky breath as Jaycee leaned her head back on the wall. "I failed god. And everyday, I work to lessen that failure...to be of service and purpose. Now I offer you...the assurance of a pardon....penance, and absolution. I will go with you. I will show you that working together as equals is the only true way to grace...to a future. I will do this...if you confess." Gabriel told him as Jaycee let out a sigh.

"Jesus, Gabe. What you did...that is some horrible, cowardly, spineless shit." Negan replied to his church story. "But I guess that's what a confessions supposed to be, right?" There was a silence until negan spoke up again. "My first wife was a real wife. My only real wife. Till death did us part. It was before this. I lied to her, I screwed around on her and she was sick." Negan said as Jaycee lowered her head. "And when she went...when she went, it was during this. I couldn't put her down. That is how i was weak. That is what I will confess. Because, yeah, maybe we do bite the big one here."

Gabriel slowly stood up, moving away from the door as Jaycee breathed out, walking towards it and opening it up. Gabriel held out the gun for Negan to take. "You're forgiven."

Negan then punched Gabriel in the face, Jaycee pulling an awkward look as she looked up. "Thanks you can keep your gun."

"Can we go now?" Jaycee breathed out, looking down at the walker with a grimace. "Because I am not gonna sit with you two for any longer, and you're not getting a confession from me for the things I have sinned for." She crouched down as she pulled out her pocket knife, stabbing it into the walkers chest and dragging it down.

Jaycee zipped up her jacket with her non injured arm as she placed the knife down. She looked up at the two, who just stood there. "What?" She raised her brow as she looked back down at the walkers. "At least last time we had gloves and bed sheets." She grimaced as stuck her hand into the walker, pulling out some guts and placing it on her jacket.

Negan and Gabriel followed shortly, placing the walker blood and guts all over themselves. Jaycee made sure her front was all covered, then her legs. "Gabriel, get some and put it on my back." Jaycee told him, negan did it before him, placing some on her back as she grimaced. "Thanks." She breathed out as she picked up her gun, standing up as looking outside of the window, waiting for them to finish.

When they did, they stood at the door, Negan raising his bat. "Let's make some noise." He said as he banged on the door with the bat. Gabriel hit the door with his hand as Jaycee did it with the but of her gun.

Jaycee then opened the door as the walkers started to pool in. They all stood still, the walkers going straight past them as they quickly snuck out. 

Jaycee pushed through the walkers, taking the lead until Gabriel fell over, making Jaycee turn around and help him up.

But, a walker made their way towards them, making negan hit the walker over the head with his bat.

Gabriel then shot at the walker that went to bite negan, which signalled all the other walkers. Jaycee pulled out her gun as she aimed it at the walkers, making a path as they continued to walk.

Jaycee pulled Gabriel towards the steps, looking up to see walkers. "Goddamn." Negan breathed out as the walkers fell on them.

But the three quickly got up, killing the walkers one by one. Jaycee went to reload her gun—a walker grabbing a hold of her. She had no time to grab her knife as the walkers mouth came close to her arm.

But the walker fell to the floor, limp as negan bashed the walkers head in. Jaycee panted heavily as he pulled her up the stairs, Gabriel following.

Negan opened one of the doors as they all piled inside, quickly closing the door behind them.

Jaycee squeezed her eyes shut and she leaned forwards, her hands on her knees as she swallowed thickly. "Well, that was a piece of cake." She muttered as she stood back up, looking at her arm, that was still bleeding. "We still got that doctor?" She uttered, looking up at Negan.

Negan didn't say anything as he moved towards her, unwrapping the ripped t-shirt from her arm, and re-wrapped it, Jaycee letting out a hiss as he tied it. "Thanks" she mumbled.

Then a gunshot went off, then yells. The three went in the direction of the gunshot, seeing a crowd of people.

Negan started to whistle as he rounded the corner, Jaycee looking down at all the people who started to kneel. She shared a look with Gabriel, both of them getting down on their knees. "Ah, Regina." Negan looked over to the woman that fired the bullet.

Jaycee looked over to Dwight and Bellamy, who were both looking over at her. "Now, why'd you have to go and do that?" Negan continued. "I am guessing that a lot of you fine folks thought I was dead, chewed up, never to be crapped out again." He lowered his bat from his shoulder. "Well, here's a little refresher on who the hell I am. I wear a letter jacket, I have Lucille and my nutsack is made of steel. I am not dying until I am damn good and ready." He grinned down at his people. "Now, if you'll all excuse me, I am in deep need of a sandwich, a shower, and some of that, uh, wilting lion orchid deep-tissue shit that Frankie learned in San Francisco. Hell, I might do it all at once."

He tilted his head as he pointed at Simon. "But after that, we have some serious business to attend to. Like talking to my right hand man." He grinned as he lowered his bat. "You see, we got to figure out how all this could've happened like it happened. And then...well, and then we're gonna get back doing what we have always down. We will save people!"

"Thank you, negan. Thank god for you." A woman said as Jaycee raised her brows.

"And that is why I am here." Negan grinned down at Gabriel. He then pointed to the two men in-front. "Gentlemen, gently take him to number two." He pointed to Gabriel as everyone started to stand up. "Gently." Negan then turned to Jaycee with a grin. "Go clean up, then, get that stitched up. Youre like a damn magnet to those bullets, who can blame them?" He told her with a grin as Jaycee slowly nodded her head.

After Jaycee had a shower and went to see Dr. Carson, she followed Dwight and Bellamy into the meeting room. She sat in one of the chairs, looking up at the woman that threw a green bag on the table. "Good news is, I figured out where that assholes gun came from." Arat told them with a sigh, hand on her hip.

"And the bad news?" Negan asked her, moving his hand away from his mouth.

"They're ours." The man beside Arat said. "Stolen from the armoury. A worker couldn't have gotten this many guns without us knowing about it." He said as Jaycee looked at Dwight from the corner of her eye. "They couldn't have even got one."

"No, one of our own did this...is doing this, right now." Simon said as he pinged into the table.

"Tell me how we find him, Simon." Negan turned to his right hand man, eyebrows raised.

"We...find when the munitions went missing. Through that, we get an idea of how, which hopefully lead us right to who." Simon explained as Jaycee bit down on her tongue. "But we start with when."

Jaycee looked over to see Eugene glaring at Dwight, Dwight lowering his head as Jaycee shared a look with Bellamy.

— madeleines notes

My girl just keeps getting shot... oops. She's like magnet to bullets honestly... HAHAAH.

Long chapter but aye well 🎀🎀🤭🤭

I'm loving your comments, they're so funny to read!

( I feel criminal because I'm writing this fic... and my Glenn fic... OOPS. )

Sue me okay. They are my fav twd characters... SO 🎀🎀

I GOT SCHOOL TOMORROW SOMEONE SAVE ME PLEASE. Brb gonna CRY MYSELF TO SLEEP.

And I just had a massive argument with my "friend" so, YAY 🎀

8th April 2024
4412 words