warnings: none, but slightly disturbing

title: silence

the silence gets far too much. 

it presses on my skin, a very solid thing, pushing me down until i feel the cold wood of the floor against my face. it suffocates me, sticking in my mouth, the shape of silent words tangled in my vocal cords. it rings in my ears, so loud and so demanding, taking my attention and leaving it there at the same time, so i am in a million places at once.

i scream so loud that no one hears.

soft walls and soft things. the utopia, the perfect peace and the perfect stillness can never be broken, a cyclic reality that i can never escape. nothing breaks when i throw it, nothing makes a sound when it breaks. alone with my head of empty thoughts and my barely beating heart creating a steady rhythm that does nothing to break the silence. i am broken. i am nothing. 

i do not make a sound.

i am afraid of myself. afraid of perfection. afraid of a world where nothing goes wrong. afraid of silence. and peace. and stillness. what is a life without noise? without disruption and surprise and movement and chaos. i am afraid of being content.

the silence gets far too much.

the author speaks:
based on experience :)