I watch Monica's perfect back end enter the shower and then step in after her. I still can't believe it was my idea to shower together. I've never showered with anyone in my entire fucking life, not even to fuck them.  I've had sex loads of times in pools, hot tubs, public places but not my personal shower.  You know, my shower, the place I scrub the feeling of being touched away in and where I drown myself in self-loathing, quite literally.

I close me eyes while blowing out a deep breath as the hot water runs over my skin. The sensation is more than welcoming because I can't even remember the last time I've even taken a shower. I feel a set of hands on my chest which makes my eyes jerk open. The minute I look down at her she slowly pulls them away.

Her eyes flutter up at me as we stand underneath the water together. Her wavy hair begins to flatten as the water soaks every inch of her olive skin. Shes got no make-up, no nothing on. She's completely fucking naked and she's completely fucking beautiful.

And you're just staring at her like an idiot when she just asked you to fuck her.

I'm pulled out of my internal scolding the moment Monica turns around but not before she gives me a mischievous smirk. She puts both hands on the wall in front of her, wiggling her perfect little round ass back at me. My cock is stiff as board just at the sight. I could stare at that ass all day.

I wonder if maybe she'd let me fuck that perfect backside one day? Anal isn't really my thing but every part of this woman is exquisitely fuckable. Every. Single. Part.

I begin to move toward her but realize I don't like the fact that I can't see her face. For some unknown reason I want to watch every little fuckable expression she makes, because it's a guarantee that no one else will ever pleasure her like me and I want to watch. I want to implant every little torturously seductive glance I give her to memory.

"Turn around." My voice is husky as hell right now. I can practically feel my inner lion pacing around in my head. 

"What?" Monica cocks her head over her shoulder at me questioningly. 

"I said, turn around." That came out like a growl. I fucking growled at her, like a damn dog. Monica straightens herself and reverses her position so that she's facing me instead of the back of the shower stall. Much better. "You're so fucking beautiful."          

What planet have I landed on? The one where I'm apparently a lion-dog who is now handing out compliments and showering with people. What in the actual fuck? I'm just going to chalk it up to the possibility that there's amphetamines still coursing through me.

"I know."  She smirks back at me and I realize my personality is clearly rubbing off on her. Among other things. At least she's not a lion-dog yet.

I growl at her again but this time it's playfully and at her arrogance. I pull her into me, kissing her deeply beneath the warm water. I feel her hands press against my abdomen, feeling the taught muscles I have there. She runs her fingers over each well-defined one until she splays her hands on my pectorals. I almost freeze as I feel the darkness begin to creep up my spine. 

Nope. Fuck that. Not today demons, not today.

While kissing her hungrily, I jerk up each of her legs around my waist and slam her against the back of the shower. She lets out a series of slightly pained noises as I quickly thrust into her. Fuck, she feels amazing. I thrust into her again, harder this time, making her throw her head against the back of the shower. She's so tight, so fucking wet and I can feel it so much more because it's so much fucking better without anything between us.

"Wait, wait..." Monica moans out but I don't slow down, not even a little. "Sean. Seeeaaan..." It comes out low and slow. I've never heard someone say my name quite like that. It makes me quiver from head to toe. "Yooouu neeeeed to..." I rip another loud moan from her lips as I bite into her neck. "Jesus Christ, Sean, you need to put a condom on!"

Dammit.

I pull away from her slightly but don't pull out of her. I slow down my rhythm, giving her long languid strokes that have her beautiful big eyes fluttering. "Are you on birth control?" I continue to push in and out of her at an aching pace.

Hah. I can see it in your eyes sweetheart, you want this just as much as I do.

Monica gulps, takes a big breath but finally nods in response. That was all the confirmation I needed to not pull out of her tight, sweet little hole. She wraps her arms around my neck and I freeze momentarily. "Sorry," her eyes turn frightened as she begins to pull her limbs away from me.

"It's fine, leave them." I have really, truly, utterly lost my fucking mind. It must have jumped out the window the moment she basically said I could fucking bust inside of her.    

I continue going slow, bringing my hand to her clit and pinching it slightly. I look at her and she's looking down, watching me work her with my fingers and cock. Her mouth is making a perfect little 'O' as ragged breaths make their way in and out of her chest rapidly. That's right sweetheart, watch me fuck you senseless.

"It feels so good, Sean." She squeezes her eyes shut as I gradually pick up speed. "Fuck, you feel so good." 

"So do you, Monica. Fuck, so do you." My mouth finds hers as I plunge into her tight heat at a much harder pace. My mouth covers the strangled cries that begin to leave her mouth as I feel her begin to pulsate around me. She's becoming tighter and tighter with each twerk of my fingers, each merciless thrust inside of her. 

She combusts into tiny little fragments, tearing her lips away from mine and throwing her head back against the wall. Her nails dig into the skin of my back ferociously and I don't even care that she's probably making me bleed. I don't care that she pulls me tighter into her arms because she's milking my cock in the most perfect fucking way. No one has ever had a spasm so tightly around me, forcing my orgasm to quickly build at an almost blinding rate. 

She starts grinding her hips against me again, like she's begging for more and fuck me, I'm going to give it to her. I stand up straight as I  pull her off the wall, wrapping my arms around her with my hands over her shoulders. Her legs wrap tighter around me and I begin pounding into her so fast and so hard, harder than I've ever fucked anyone in my life. I feel like I'm in the fucking Olympics, literally.

Monica is holding on to me for dear life, screaming so loud I think she's going to burst my eardrum at any moment. That's when I feel it, her tightening into a fucking vice grip and it's making me feel the most exquisite sensations around my cock. "Fuck! Monica!" I roar as my orgasm rips through me before I'm even able to register it. And holy fucking hell she is clamping down on me murderously as I fill her to the brim. I feel another load shoot out of me, making me grunt out loudly. 

I'm lightheaded. I'm seeing stars. I'm fucking losing my god damn balance. I begin to fall forward, almost killing us both but I brace myself on the back of the shower. Fucking graceful, Sean. That was really brilliant, truly.

I'm thankful that she doesn't seem to notice my near-death orgasm collapse. Wait, she definitely did because she starts giggling. Fucking, hell. This is what every man wants to hear after having a mind-blowing orgasm, his girl giggling. Did I just refer to her as mine again? Fuck.

I let out a ragged breath and stand up with her arms still wrapped tightly around me. She slowly untwines herself from me and I pull myself out of her. I set her down on her feet, waiting until she's steady until I step away from her. Monica reaches up and pulls my head down to meet hers as she kisses me. This is not a hot and heavy, I want to fuck some more kiss. No, this kiss says something entirely different and it has my dead heart palpitating.

Before I can think about that too much, I drag her under the warm water. I kiss her back fiercely, letting my mouth consume hers and nothing more. Wrapping my hand around the back of her neck aggressively, I reign in all control of this situation. I reach between her legs and thrust two fingers inside of her. She gasps and looks up at me with those bright caramel-colored doe eyes. "Sean, I don't think I can have anymore..." I curl my fingers right there, right there.

I bite down on her bottom lip and I know that yes, indeed she can have more orgasms despite the argument she was about to try and make. It's really not an argument any woman should be trying to have with me in the room, especially if you are this particular woman.

I fuck her with my hand until she comes not once, not twice but three more times. I give her so much fucking pleasure that she's basically a stuttering, lifeless mess until the water goes cold. And that's my excuse to get out of the shower. I don't want her to essentially freeze herself to death. Even though I've gotten her so hot and bothered the likelihood of that happening is the equivalent to hell freezing over. It's just not going to happen.

I'm thankful she hasn't figured it out yet. Figured out the reason I gave her more orgasms, well, beside the fact that I truly wanted to. It's because I couldn't give her what she had wanted originally. I could never give her what she was asking for in that kiss. Her lips were too sensual, too soft, too caring on mine. They were almost devoted and there was no way I could give her that.

Devotion.  The word has me cringing internally because I live in the darkness. I breath in it. I thrive in it and the light that she's trying to shine into my life will only burn out once she fully discovers it. I can't let her uncover the raging demons I have inside me, she's not dark enough for them. They'll consume all of her and I can't let that happen. I won't let that happen.