"The only world I could exist in
Was one you lived in
Ooh, you almost had me fooled"

Andromeda Black found that the sun was both her best friend and her worst enemy. In the summer, she had to almost bathe in suntan lotion to keep from getting a sunburn, and even then sometimes she managed to get a burn. Not to mention the number of times that the sun had blinded her because she had forgotten her sunglasses. Yet, the sun rising also signified the start of a new day, one that could, perhaps, help her forget the horrors of her past, or at least help her pretend to.

With that being said, when the sun woke her up at ungodly hours on September first, she cursed it to the moon and back. After many restless nights of sleep, she had been hoping to steal more than a few hours before she went back to sharing a room with multiple other teenage girls that had habits of being really annoying when Andromeda wanted to sleep.

She wasn't expecting to get much sleep anyway though, as last night she was unable to shut her window shades. Her father had found her stash of books by muggle authors and after confiscating said stash, he thought it would be an appropriate punishment to push her down the wooden stairs.

Not being as graceful as her sisters, Andromeda landed oddly on her hip and discovered it difficult to walk. The only reason she made it to her room was since Narcissa still found room in her heart to pity her. Bellatrix's pity was long gone, in fact, Andromeda sometimes questioned if it had ever been there at all.

"Stop being so stupid all the time! You knew they would find out about those books!"

Her mind was like a broken record player she once had—her Uncle Alphard had gifted it to her—the words of Narcissa wouldn't stop chanting themselves. Her sister was right, Andromeda did know that their parents would eventually find out about the books, but she found a thrill in going against what they said, like an adrenaline rush.

How many more pushes down the stairs she could take was unknown to even her. One of these days they were bound to go too far, although Andromeda liked to think that since she was their own flesh and blood they'd have mercy.

Crawling slowly out of her bed with harsh aches and pains, she made her way to the closet that had accumulated so much clothing over the years. Most of it was fancy dresses she had to have for pureblood banquet dinners, yet Andromeda was clever enough to buy a few items of muggle clothing from Hogsmeade with her allowance. Those were held dearest to her heart, so they went to the back of her closet with a plethora of clothing covering them.

Without a second glance, she tore them out of her closet as quietly as possible—so as not to wake anyone up—and placed them in the very bottom of her Hogwarts trunk. The trunk itself was in pristine condition, her parents would have no less. With black leather freshly polished by one of the house-elves, it showed the image the Black family wanted to have, a perfect outside while the inside of the trunk needed repairing.

Even if the muggles stared at them with a confused expression, Andromeda wouldn't dare wear anything except her Hogwarts uniform and robes to the platform with her family. If her parents ever saw her wear a band shirt, let alone her ripped jeans, she would be dead.

Andromeda winced while grabbing the green plaid skirt and white button-up shirt. Turning back around to face the mirror, she paused for a minute to see her reflection.

Looking in the mirror, she scrutinized every inch of her body. Her hair wasn't curly enough, or the right shade of brown, her nose was pointed down too far, her cheekbones weren't as high as Bellatrix's, her skin was far too pale, and her eyes were her worst feature.

Instead of being the perfect silver color that both of her sisters inherited, her eyes were a dull gray. There was no life in them, absolutely no sparkle. They sat on her face lifeless, a good analogy for how she felt.

Tearing her plain eyes away from the mirror, to start dressing, she pulled the button up over her scarred arms. It took her a minute to button the buttons, and when she reached the top she left the top one undone. It wasn't too risky to show her collarbone, even if her mother would say so since she was going to school.

After pulling on her skirt and tucking her shirt in, she made the executive decision that the emerald tie was not needed. In her expert opinion, the tie was a fashion statement, and she appreciated the fact that both girls and guys had to wear them, but the tie itself was at best tedious to tie and could quickly become time-consuming.

So, she skipped that step and sat back on her bed as her hip ached.

Andromeda had gotten good at looking for imperfections, it was a family trait she had learned from her mother. Meda used it for staring at the wallpaper to find where the applier could've done a better job, while her mother used it on her.

Nothing Andromeda ever did would be good enough for her, but this was something that she had grown used to since starting Hogwarts. Every once in a while her mother will find a brand new insecurity to pick at until it's raw, yet until then, Druella was powerless over Andromeda because her daughter had long become numb.

A knock at the door sounded Meda's panic lights. The clock on the wall read ten-thirty in the morning-how had so much time passed by? Jumping up from the bed and brushing her uniform down, she briskly went to open the door only for it to slam open into her face.

"Oh, you're already awake," Bellatrix's regal tone filled her room. "How's your hip?"

"How'd you know it was my hip?" Andromeda narrowed her eyes until they bounced to Narcissa, who had entered the room with a green apple in hand. "Can't even stop gossiping at home, Cissy, can you?"

"I'm sorry, but are you insulting the person who carried you to your bed last night?" Narcissa tutted at her sister's behavior just as Bellatrix stole her apple. "Hey!"

"Mother said no eating in the bedrooms," Bellatrix shrugged and took a bite of the apple. "I'm only doing you a favor."

"Did you two need something?" Andromeda asked, clearly annoyed that her sisters could bound into her room like that.

"Just wanted to check on good ole Meda," Cissy responded with indifference. "But, I suppose I was up here with a reason... What was that reason, Bella?" Narcissa feigned forgetfulness.

"Father wishes to speak with you," Bella said, not partaking in her younger sister's games. "He says it's urgent."

"And you didn't think to tell me the second you walked in here?" Meda's eyes bulged. "Are you trying to have me killed?"

"I'm not the one who put those books in your hand, so it's not my fault what the consequences are," Narcissa looked coldly into Meda's eyes.

"Well, where is he?"

"In his office, brat, where else would he be?" Bellatrix replied, looking at her nails. "Have fun!"

Her sisters walked out of her bedroom, and taking with them the only thing in between Meda and her father's office door. That door would forever be etched into the deepest crannies of her brain, it haunted like a ghost that had nowhere else to go.

She had nowhere else to go. The memories weren't trapped inside this house, she was.

With a breath of caution taken, she set her face to the most placid setting, like a doll, and knocked three times on the door. The only way to keep the shaking from her jaw was to clench her teeth, a bad habit, but it was necessary to calm her nerves as her father answered the door.

"Andromeda," Cygnus spoke with a cigar hanging from his lips. "I thought you were never going to come in."

"I'm truly sorry for my tardiness," she apologized immediately, but without the meaning behind it, "it won't happen again."

The fake apology seemed to pass Cygnus's tests, but she wasn't too surprised by this. Andromeda had been learning the best ways to survive under their roof, and the very best was to lie.

"After that stunt you pulled yesterday, I want you to know I'm not impressed."

Like you hadn't already shown that by pushing me down the stairs.

"But, if you're on your best behavior at all times from now on, I believe you can get in good graces with all the right names," Cygnus smiled at his own words.

All she could offer in return was a stiff smile and curt nod. She couldn't trust herself anymore. Any rash action that appeared seemed to pull her in its direction, despite what anyone had to say about it.

"Off you go now, I don't want you to be tardy for something else," he said passively.

"Goodbye father," Andromeda replied as she walked back out the door.

When the door was shut behind her, Andromeda flinched as if she had been slapped herself. The smallest noises triggered the biggest reactions, which annoyed the hell out of her because she had been taught not to show any weaknesses. Reactions were weaknesses.

...

Druella and Cygnus had decided that their children were responsible enough to be taken to King's Cross by some of their house-elves. However, the house-elves were not allowed to be seen on the platform because it was enough that the children went to Hogwarts, the Black family didn't need any more connections to the school.

Bellatrix had kept her distance from her sisters as if being younger made them less worthy of her attention. Andromeda wasn't complaining though, she had begun despising her sister's presence sometimes.

She detached herself from Narcissa, only after she agreed upon sitting next to her at dinner. This meant that Meda could now look forward to her train ride in a compartment alone.

Being introverted, Andromeda didn't particularly protest this idea though. It allowed her to set her mind right for the year ahead of her, Merlin knew that she needed to. She could also skim the pages of her textbooks, getting a head start on her studies proved to be beneficial every year so far.

Andromeda had been doing just that when the compartment door slid open and a girl smiled at her apologetically. Things could've played out much differently if Meda had given this girl her usual glare, but as the girl lugged her trunk and owl's cage into the compartment, she found herself unable to do anything.

"I hope it's okay if I sit here, the girls from my dorm are being right jerks," she said as she slid the door back shut.

This girl, whoever she happened to be, would give her mother a heart attack. She spoke so casually and looked so at ease with the world, Andromeda wondered how one could manage this.

Her Gryffindor tie hung loosely around her neck, and Andromeda wondered if her shirt had ever seen an iron. Not only that, but her skirt looked several inches shorter than Meda's was, and her chunky, black boots added multiple inches to her height.

She also wore what Andromeda thought was a hijab. It was maroon, a move probably made deliberately to match her uniform.

"M'sorry, I haven't even introduced myself!" She said as she sat down across from Andromeda, who still looked bewildered and had yet to say a word. "I'm Henri Moreau."

"Moreau? Is that-"

"Yeah, it's French," Henri said offhandedly.

"Well, I'm Andromeda Black," Meda replied at which Henri smiled.

"Ah, I'm in the presence of Hogwarts royalty," Henri chuckled at her joke, but Meda scrunched her nose.

"Do people really call me that?" Andromeda voiced her distaste.

"Sometimes," Henri said, continuing when she saw Meda's look. "I s'pose they're too afraid to mention your name other times though. Which would you prefer?"

"Pardon?"

"Would you rather be called royalty or be called nothing?" Henri asked again.

Andromeda thought on this for a second. Perhaps she took the question too seriously, but being called royalty implied that she was above everyone else, and being called nothing meant you would end up rather lonely. She didn't see herself above everyone else—contrary to some people she knew very well—but she didn't want to be alone forever.

"Neither. I'd rather be called by my name," Andromeda answered finally.

"Sounds good, Andromeda," Henri said, the name rolling off her tongue. "But, we're going to need a nickname for you."

Andromeda doubted Henri would want to be around her long enough to come up with a nickname, but that didn't stop her from playing along. It was refreshing to speak with someone who didn't constantly remind her to fix her posture or to be ladylike.

It was a shame to Andromeda that Henri's presence was temporary. She found that she didn't mind it all that much.

...

Author's Note:

Song: Me Without You
By: Ashe

A reminder that all bodies are beautiful, and you should in no way pick yourself apart like Andromeda did.

For now, I've decided to update once a week. This is subject to change, but you can expect an update next week on Monday!

Lmao anyways thanks for reading
-teddy xx