Kaida tired herself out and fell back asleep after half an hour.

Kirishima adjusts, so the two of them are under the covers on her bed. She's completely sprawled out across his chest. He leans back against the pillow propped against the short headboard, texting the newly made group chat who were in Katsuki's room earlier.

He reports that Kaida is asleep again, and he's staying with her.

Sero replies that he'll bring them dinner.

Kirishima leans his head back against the pillows after turning his phone screen off and setting it beside him. He closes his eyes, taking a deep breath as he rubs his right hand up and down Kaida's back. He leans up, opening his eyes to look at the cute sleeping girl on his chest. He sighs happily, a light flush appearing on his cheeks.

He takes this time to think, leaning his head back again. He knows he's not the smartest or strongest, but he thinks he's pretty good at understanding people. He probably won't understand a lot of what's said sometimes, but he's willing to lend an ear. Hopefully, his soulmate will confide in him.

A light knock on the door interrupts his thinking, lifting his head back up. "It's open."

The door slowly opens to reveal Sero with two plates of food including the two's favorite drinks. "Dinner." He looks around the room. "Whoa. Cool room." He walks up to the side of the bed, placing the plates of food on top of the short headboard. "You look comfortable." He grins.

"Yeah, thanks for the food, man."

"No problem," Sero responds in a whisper, looking down at the blonde. "How's she doing?"

"Hasn't moved since she fell asleep," Kirishima reports.

"Hopefully, she'll stay that way," Sero continues whispering. "She needs it if the giant bags under her eyes are anything to go by. They're as bad as sensei's."

"Yeah..."

"Well, if you need anything else just message the chat," Sero says, turning with a wave. "Night."

"Night."

The door clicks closed behind him.

Kirishima sighs, maneuvering his plate enough so he can pick off of it without disturbing Kaida.

...

Kaida is drowning, but she just won't fucking die.

No matter how many waves crash down and pull her under, she's still alive. She can breathe. Barely, but it's enough. She doesn't want to die. She's scared of the thought.

She's numb.

She's supposed to be healing. She's just numb.

She's tired.

So fucking tired.

She's tired of being tired. She wants to be rested. She wants to feel alive.

She's not lost in her thoughts. She has no thoughts. She just wants to not feel like she's falling apart anymore.

It sucks. Everything was getting better. She was happier. She was getting better. It all comes crashing down because of one small mistake.

She blames the world. But how can she when it's all her fault? Everything bad that happens is because of her.

She wishes she could go back in time to rescue her younger self from ever having that happen to her.

Blood. Blood everywhere.

Silence.

Smoke.

Blurred vision. Tears?

Crackling of fire.

I'm scared. I'm so scared. What happened? A villain?

Katsuki? Katsuki! Where's Katsuki?!

Crawling.

Coughing.

I'm scared.

More blood.

Deku? Asleep? Okay. He's okay.

Katsuki! Where is he?!

More crawling. Dodging chairs, wooden splinters, plaster, wires, metal, ceiling tiles, melted toys, ...bodies, fires...

There he is!

Something's wrong. He's not breathing! Katsuki! Wake up!

I'm scared!

His body moves, reaching toward her. His eyes open to reveal black nothingness. Why? Why did you do this?!

Kaida sits up, breathing heavily. She whips off the blanket suffocating her. Her legs flip to hang off the side of her bed. She leans forward as her fingers dig into the mattress, making her knuckles turn white. Her eyes go blank as her breathing goes numb, staring at the wall.

She deserves this. It's what she gets for what she did.

~~~

He must've fallen asleep at some point. He yawns, stretching a bit only to find Kaida not snuggled up to him anymore. He's immediately awake, sitting up in a slight panic.

Sitting beside him on the edge of the bed is Kaida, staring off into her room. He reaches up and gently touches her shoulder. She flinches and blinks a few times then rubs her eyes.

"Bakubabe? You oka–?"

"...Why are you here?" She cuts him off with a harsh but quiet voice.

"Your brother sent me in his place. Thought I'd do a better job than him."

She scoffs, pulling her knees to her chest. It's silent for a few minutes, only her taking a few quiet breaths. "...Thank you..."

He tilts his head not hearing what she said. "Huh?"

Her face flushes, burying her face in her knees. "I'm not saying it again!"

"Okay...? Did you... sleep well?"

"I... Uh... but I... I had..." she mumbles the rest.

"I can't hear you."

She turns in a huff, cheeks still flushed. "I think it's the most sleep I've gotten for a while!"

Kirishima blinks back before smiling. "Glad I could help!"

"Pssh..."

"Hey... will you... finally tell me what's wrong?" he asks, reaching out to gently touch her shoulder.

Her shoulders slump as she falls back onto the bed. He flushes as her head lands in his lap. She looks up at him with an unreadable expression as she watches him tilt his head away from her, so she can't see his pink face. She reaches up, grabs his chin, and forces it down, so she can see him. His face ends up matching his hair.

"Why?"

"W-Why... wh-what?"

She squeezes his face harder, making his mouth pout and cheeks squish. "Why do you care so much? I've been so fucking mean to you. Why continue trying?"

Kaida's damaged. When someone intrudes the usual pain... being sweet and... loving. Giving her something she deserves. She has no idea how to respond.

He pulls her hand off his face, gently holding it. "Cause I'm not gonna give up on you. You're hurting. I don't want to see you hurting. I care about you. I know you... might think I have an ulterior motive, but the only motive I have is wanting you to be happy."

"Nobody is that nice."

He quickly grabs her face and squishes her cheeks as his brows furrow. "Stop it and just accept that I want it."

She blinks, eyes darting between his own. Trying to find any sign of a lie. A few seconds pass by before she returns to the world. She grunts and shoves his hand off. "Don't do that again."

"Then stop being difficult." He looks at the time to read 11:35. "Looks like it's time for lunch."

Her eyes widen, seeing the time. "I missed my medication."

"Good. You shouldn't be taking it anymore anyway."

Her hair shadows her eyes as she drops her head. "That's not the point. Aizawa bitches at me if I miss them."

A hard knock comes from the door, making the two flinch. Speak of the Devil, and he shall appear.

"Bakugo, you need to get up," Aizawa's muffled voice comes from the other side. "You missed your scheduled medication time again. Let's not have this conversation again. I don't wanna fight you."

Kaida gets up to answer the door only to be pulled back to the bed. "Hey!"

Kirishima gets up instead, answering the door.

Aizawa goes to knock again as the door swings open. "Good, let– Kirishima? What're you doing in her room?"

"Telling you she's not taking her medication today."

"That's not your decision to make."

"It is if it's hurting her!"

Aizawa sighs. "It's not our jurisdiction to make. We have no control over it."

"You can't tell me you don't notice how it's killing her! It's obviously not helping."

"I know, kid. But I can't do anything about it."

"We're always around her. You should report it."

"I've tried."

"Then try harder!"

"It's a legal matter. She has to take them, or we all can get in trouble."

"...What? Why?"

"Can't tell you that."

Kaida walks up behind Kiri, lightly pulling him back. "It's fine." She gets in front of him to follow Aizawa.

He grabs her wrist. "No! It's not fine! She shouldn't have to take something that's hurting her!"

"Listen, I'm working on it," Aizawa sighs. "I'm not disagreeing with you. I'm on your side. But until I can convince them that, she needs to hold out a little longer." He looks at Kaida with a sad expression. "We're... lucky that she's still here with us and able to continue going to this school. They wanted to have her expelled from the school and committed to a psychiatric ward. We're lucky that Nezu and Recovery Girl are on our side. I promise that we're working on it."

"I-I don't understand! Why is this a big legal decision?!"

Aizawa looks at Kaida whose head is down. "Classified. Not allowed to tell anyone about this. I honestly shouldn't of told you about any of it."

Kirishima drops her arm as she tugs it from his grasp.

"I'll be alright, Kiri... I can handle it..."

He sighs agitatedly. "But you shouldn't have to." He rubs a hand down his face. "Fine. I'll wait, but I won't wait much longer before I get all of class 1A to start a riot."

Aizawa nods as he and Kaida disappear around the corner.

Kirishima groans, rubbing the sleep crusties from his eyes. He shuts the door to Kaida's room behind him as he heads to his room. He gets himself changed silently before heading down to see what was made for lunch.

He sits down at their usual table beside Mina.

Kaminari sidles up beside him with a mischievous grin. "Have a good night?"

"Shut up, man."

Kaminari silently sits across from him, looking like a kicked puppy. Katsuki is helping make lunch.

"Whoa! Kiri? You good bro?" Sero voices, hearing the harsh tone. He pats Kaminari's shoulder next to him, telling him not to take it personally.

Kirishima grunts, face sullen as he slumps onto the table. "Not really. This all just sucks. There's nothing I can do to help."

"You being there for her is enough," Mina says, rubbing circles on his back.

"We saw her leave with Aizawa," Sero says. "She didn't look as tired as usual."

"Yeah, that's a plus!" Mina grins.

He flushes. "She said... that... it was the best... sleep she's had for a while..."

Sero and Kaminari grin. "You must be a comfy pillow then." The two high-five after jinxing each other.

Kirishima buries his head into his crossed arms on the table in embarrassment. "Guyssss!"

...

Lunch the next day rolled around sooner than expected.

Kirishima, thinking that Kaida won't be in the same mood as usual, goes up to ask to have lunch together. "Hey, Bakubabe? Let's go eat!"

She glares at him then at her brother, grabbing her boxed lunch before stomping out of the room.

"Damn, what'd you do, Bakubro?" Mina asks.

"She's probably annoyed that I sent shitty hair in my place," he scoffs and rolls his eyes.

Kirishima pouts, lightly kicking the floor with a grunt. He ruffles his hair. "Dammit... I thought we would be passed this."

"You can't expect everything to be okay after only one time," Katsuki huffs. "Dumbass."

"Yeah, yeah..." Kirishima waves off, slumping out the room with his hands in his pockets.

"Well, let's go get some grub," Sero says, following behind him. "We'll just make her sit with us."

"Nah. I'm... suddenly not hungry," Kirishima sighs. "I'll see you guys after lunch."

"Where you going?" Kaminari asks.

"Gonna get some air. Figure out another way to get to her," he answers, shuffling down the hall with his hands in his pockets.

"Man, he's taking this whole thing really hard," Sero says.

Katsuki just squints his eyes as he watches and contemplates Kirishima.

"We're gonna have to watch over him too! We can't have him not be his happy self!" Mina exclaims worriedly, fist raised in determination. "He's the light that keeps everyone together!"

Kirishima shoves the door to the roof open in annoyance. "Dammit!" He freezes as he sees who's up here.

She freezes too mid-bite before sighing. "Did you fucking follow me?"

"No! A coincidence!"

Kaida scrunches her nose and rolls her eyes. Her form slumps. After a few silent minutes of them staring at each other, one in flight mode but frozen and one with annoyance, she pats the spot beside her. "May as well make yourself useful and be extra body heat." A fib. It's hot. "The wind chill up here is ridiculous."

He takes the lackluster invitation and slowly makes his way to sit down beside her. "Alright."

It's silent between them. The only noise being Kaida's soft chewing and the cold wind blowing over them.

Then Kirishima's stomach loudly grumbles, reminding him that he's supposed to be eating at this time. Saying, 'What the fuck you doing on the roof? Time to eat. Let's go.'

His face turns pink, covering his growling stomach with his hands as if that'll calm it.

Then a pair of chopsticks moves into his vision with a piece of chicken at the end. He stares at it dumbly.

"Eat it, dumbass."

He glances at her, seeing how she's tucking her head away from him as she holds out some of her bento for him. He can see the red tips of her ears, assuming she's starting to get cold.

"We should head inside. It's getting too cold up here. You're turning pin–"

She gets agitated then shoves the food into his mouth. "EAT!"

"Ackk!" he coughs a bit at the suddenness before he's able to actually chew. "Ah. It's good."

She goes to grab another piece for herself before her arm slumps beside the box. "Were... were you serious yesterday?"

"Huh?"

"About... wanting me to be happy?"

"Bakubabe, I would never lie to you about something like that," he answers intently. "I will always be here for you. Just like your brother and the rest of our class."

She finally looks at him her eyes teary. "Really?"

"Yes."

"I don't deserve your... kindness." She holds up a finger to prevent him from speaking. She places the lid over her bento, not interested in eating anymore. She sets it in his lap, shuffling closer to Kirishima, so their arms are pressed against another. "When... I first got my quirk, I was in preschool." She flips her hands, palms up, and releases tiny crackles. "Katsuki got his quirk a few days before me. His were tiny little crackles just like this."

He smiles, remembering when they switched bodies. "Like when I tried out your quirk."

"Mine... didn't show the same way his did. Getting to this level of small control is more difficult than releasing a big explosion for me. I was amazed that you didn't get them big." She leans her head back against the wall, looking to the sky. She swallows, squeezing her eyes shut as she remembers. Her fists tighten at her sides. Her whole body begins to shake.

Kirishima slowly slides his hand over her enclosed fist and gently slides his fingers under hers before intertwining them. She looks at him with caution. "You... don't have to tell me... Your brother already told me about how you... blew up your preschool."

She winces, ducking her head down. "I figured... but... he doesn't know the whole story." She pulls her knees to her chest. "Or the resulting issues."

~
We were in our classroom, coloring something for an art piece when it happened. It was sudden with no preparation. I was reaching for a crayon when my quirk was released.

One second everything is fine and happy and bright then the next everything is smokey, dark, and eerie. The only sound was the crackling of the fire.

I was the only one awake and didn't know why or how. Everyone else was knocked out by the explosion. The whole school was in crumbled ruins. The building was in barely held-together chunks as if it was made of glass. Everything was gone. I'd be able to see the sky if it wasn't for all the smoke.

There... was so much blood. So many bodies of fellow preschoolers littered around me. I was told later that nobody died. But it didn't matter. Many of them were marred beyond repair. Crushed legs or arms. Third-degree burns. Brain damage. Few had limbs amputated.

I ruined so many lives. I thought we were attacked by a villain only to learn that I was the villain. I didn't even realize I was the one who caused it.

I dropped to the floor to escape the smoke, crawling around on the floor. Dodging bodies, buried bodies, concrete pillars, fire, walls, ceiling, glass, toys, tables, etc. I crawled up to so many bodies, through so much blood, and so much debris and glass, all the while coughing and crying. I had to find my brother to make sure he was okay. I found him along with Deku both knocked out but okay. No blood. Bruises and light scratches, but no blood. Luckily, they were far behind me doing something when it happened instead of at our table.

Katsuki woke as I shook him. He quickly pulled me into his arms and rocked us back and forth until heroes and authorities arrived to save us. He reassured me everything would be alright. He held me tight, keeping me together. Even though he was as scared as I was, he made sure I was his priority.

If only he knew. Nothing would be alright. He didn't see the things I did.

I pretended everything was okay.

Katsuki kept me together, thinking that all my nightmares were strictly the preschool incident.

I was put on a watch list. It was those damn watchers, finding new ways to torture my quirk. The only way I was safe was if I followed orders.

I was taken in to find a way to control my quirk. Keep it suppressed. I had to train it constantly, but only under constant quirk-suppressing pills. Or that's what I was told they were. They didn't work. I think I was a Guinea pig cause there's no such thing. Anyway, I was forced to do things I didn't want to. They used my fear against me. The same people that are making me have to take my medication now. I have to. It's the only way that I can be somewhat free. The alternative is being locked up.

My brother thinks I've only been using my quirk for a few years. I've just been off being suppressed for that long. A big reason why my quirk isn't controllable. I was released from the watch as they finally decided it was safe.
~

"After the split personalities and the explosion of that warehouse, I-I was forced back into it. I'm on a stricter leash. My life depends on whether the Hero Public Safety Commission deems me safe or a villain. Just one wrong move, and I'm finished." She squeezes his hand. "I'm-I'm not okay. I can't escape."

"Does... Aizawa know?"

"...Yes. He working on a loophole. Something. All I can do is wait."

He pulls her into a hug. "I will do everything I can to protect you. I hate everything about this."

"Maybe it would be better if I was a villain..."

"Don't say something like that! This is all a big mistake that they're blowing out of proportion. You didn't mean to do it."

"I FUCKING KNOW!" she screams out. "IT ISN'T FUCKING FAIR!" Tears run down her face as he wipes them away.

"I'm will be here for you, and so will the rest of the school." He gets an idea. "How about we go to that fox cafe we went to before?"

"I don't think I'm even allowed to be off UA property... Probably need permission."

"Whaat?! That's ridiculous! They can't keep you here like you're some sort of prisoner. You're at a hero school in the hero course. There's no good reason as to why you couldn't."

She makes him flush as she leans her head on his shoulder, looking up at him. "...I'll have to ask Aizawa."

He sighs. "Fine." He looks down at her looking up at him. He averts his eyes. "He-Hey... it's-it's getting cold. We should head inside..."

It's hot. It's the end of August. He lies. He's so damn awkward.

"...Yeah. Okay..."

...~~~...
Couldn't figure out how I wanted to end the chapter, so I'mma just cut it off here.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and Happy New Years everyone!🎄🎅🏼🤶🏼🕎🥳🎊