𝕋𝕙𝕖 smell of lavender filled my nose as I slowly regained consciousness in Cersei's bed. The sun was already shining brightly into the chamber, we had been sleeping for a long time. But it had been a long day, too. I lay unmoving in the soft sheets, relishing the quiet of the moment, a peace we so rarely got to feel these days. Eventually, Cersei stirred next to me, and I looked over at her. "Morning, love", I said softly and kissed her temple. She blinked up at me with a sleepy smile. "Up so early?" "It's not early", I chuckled. "We slept in almost to noon, I think." Cersei ran a hand over her face. "That long? I don't even remember falling asleep." "Me neither", I laughed. "But I needed this. Now we're well rested to prepare our troops for the march north." Cersei suddenly grew still. "What is it?", I asked. "Did you want to wait longer? We should gather them as quickly as possible so they can still arrive up at the Wall in time." She still didn't reply, only avoided my eyes, nodding slowly, evasively, like someone who wanted to object but didn't dare to. A horrible suspicion dawned on me. I didn't want to speak the words, but I had to. I had to know if I was interpreting her silence right. "Except you're not going to send them at all, are you?" Cersei looked up at me fearfully, her face confession enough, and I sat up straight. "Then why did you promise to? I thought I had gotten through to you yesterday, we cannot risk the dead breaching the North! Or have you forgotten about the turning-corpses-into-new-soldiers thing they have going on?" "I have not", Cersei said, her voice equal parts defensive and close to tears. "So why would you offer false help? They will expect our armies now, they will rely on them! Without us, we don't know if they can hold the North!" "Do you think I don't know that?", Cersei exclaimed, sitting up too. "But I cannot afford to misplace my trust, not while our position is so brittle and we have a war on our doorstep that we are severely understocked for! If they were telling the truth and they will lay down their arms until the Army of the Dead is defeated, I'm sorry for my distrust. But if they use this chance to march on us while our soldiers are walking to nowhere, I'll be glad of it." "How can you still doubt that?", I asked, incredulous. "You saw the dead man, you have heard the stories - clearly this threat is real!" "And how do I know they truly prioritize it over stealing my throne?", she shot back. "With that power, it would be even easier for them to defeat these walking dead." "Which is exactly why we need to help them, given that we currently have that power", I said. "And who wouldn't focus on an army of nearly unkillable, necromancing ice soldiers first?" "That's just the thing, I don't know if they would", Cersei insisted. "Don't you see? I cannot trust them."

"Then trust me", I begged. "They're my family. They would not lie to me. And as estranged as we may be - even fighting as we may be now - I won't let them die. I know they want to do the right thing. My sister, my half-brother - they will not let Daenerys risk plunging the Seven Kingdoms into death and destruction over a throne that won't matter if the White Walkers invade." "Death and destruction is exactly what she's after. Didn't you see her dragons yesterday? Tyrion told you himself that she wanted to bring fire and blood, not a parlay." Her voice softened. "But... I understand your concern for your family. If you want to join them, it's alright. I will not send my armies, and my decision on that is final, but you are free to go wherever you please. If you wish to fight with them, you don't need my permission." I sighed. Without even intending to, she had won. "I wouldn't be of much help", I admitted. "I'd rather stay here and defend you if it becomes necessary. You asked me once if I could make my choice between you and my family, and I have. I made it a long, long time ago. Don't doubt for a second that it will always be you." She took my hand. "I appreciate that. I really do." I leaned in and kissed her. "We should still get up, though. Before we know it, we'll have spent the whole day in bed." She swung her legs over the side of the mattress. "On it." I watched her naked body as she retrieved her dressing gown. Coming up behind her as quietly as I could, I wrapped my arms around her waist before she could put it on. She squeaked in surprise, leaning into me, and I laid my head on her shoulder. "When all this is over, we should travel somewhere. Anywhere. Just find a quiet place where it'll only be us two. No wars, no crises, no responsibilities, just for a little while. We both need it." "How I wish that was possible", Cersei sighed, resting her cheek against my hair. "But I have seven kingdoms to rule. I can't get away." "Rulers can still travel", I countered. "We can mask it as a political voyage. Just think about where we could go. Dorne, perhaps. They wouldn't judge us like the people here do." She shook her head, the motion rocking through me. "Not Dorne. I don't ever want to set foot in the place that got my daughter killed." "Right. Not Dorne, then. What about the Reach? Now that the Tyrells are all gone, we could enjoy its beauty in peace." "Maybe", she hummed. "It really doesn't matter to me, as long as we're together. I just want to get this war over with so we can finally make plans for peacetime again, any at all. It's no good dreaming of a kingdom that you can't be sure will survive the year." I spun her out of my embrace and held her hands in mine. "We will survive. I know you, Cersei, I've known you for nearly a third of my life now, and I know that if anyone can keep these kingdoms safe and prospering, it's you. We will have all you dream of and more, my love. Much more."

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I was not leaving to fight in the North, but somebody else was: Jaime. Apparently, Cersei hadn't been as ready to leave him his freedom as she had me, since he had no ties to the North at all, and they had fought pretty badly before he had simply walked off. We had never been close, but I still wanted to see him off, because there was something I needed him to do. I caught him just as he was about to leave the city, already cloaked, but not concealed enough for me to not recognize him. "Wait", I called after him. He stopped and turned around with his sword half-drawn, probably expecting Cersei to have sent someone to keep him here by force. But when he saw me, he relaxed. "Vallery", he remarked. "Forgive me if you're not exactly who I expected to wave goodbye to me." "To be quite blunt, I'm not here for you", I replied. This had always been the way we conversed, trading good-natured jibes while knowing that we were just continuing this petty competitiveness for the sake of it. He had moved on from Cersei and I had nothing to hold against him anymore, nor he against me. I gestured to Rhaenys at my side. "Take her with you, please. She belongs in the North. Let her fight alongside her siblings if she wants, or live in the wild with her kin. She was never made for this city, and she has kept me safe long enough. She deserves to live her own life now." Jaime looked at me with surprise in his eyes, then bowed his head in accord. I knelt down beside Rhaenys and stroked her thick fur. "I'll miss you, girl. Thank you for all you've done for me." I hugged her. "Don't forget me." She panted encouragingly. I knew she understood me, she always had. When I pulled back and petted her head again, she licked my face. "Go on then, girl", I smiled. It was a bittersweet farewell, and we both knew it. I sent her over to Jaime and stood. "Good luck", I said to him, and meant it. "I'm sorry Cersei lied about the troops. I should have known. But I hope you can still win." I smiled. "I'd much rather deal with an army of men than an army of corpses when all is done." "So would I", he sighed, but smiled too. "Well, I don't expect Cersei will want me back here after this. So I don't suppose I'll see much of the next war either way." "I think she'll forgive you in time", I said. "No matter what, you're still her brother, and she still loves you, though not in the same way she once did. I for one would be happy to know you on our side when the time comes." "We'll see", he said and mounted his horse. Watching Rhaenys trot after him, I felt as if a piece of my soul was leaving with her.

When I could no longer see the two of them in the distance, I returned to Cersei's chambers. "Where have you been off to?", she asked, looking up from a paper on her desk. "I sent Rhaenys off with Jaime", I explained while pulling up a chair for myself next to hers and pouring us both a glass of wine. Her pen stilled. "Why?", she asked bewildered. I shook my head, more to clear my head than as an answer. "She doesn't belong here. She has spent enough time watching out for me. It's time I watch out for her and let her have some adventures of her own." Cersei nodded. "Even so, I'm sorry. She was your best friend." "And she still is. She'll just be a little further away now." After a small pause, I added, "But thank you. I will miss her, and I'd like to think she will miss me too, although I know eventually she'll be happier this way. It was the right thing to do." I tilted my head, looking at Cersei, and the corner of my lip quirked up. "You know, in a way she helped bring us together." "How is that?", Cersei asked amusedly, sitting back in her chair with her arms crossed. "The day I realized you had confessed your love to me, I didn't know what to do about it. I was so nervous and confused about my own feelings, I don't think I would have ever been able to let you know I had understood... if it weren't for her. We were in the Godswood together, and she sensed my distress and forced me to confront my feelings. She quite literally sat down on my book and stared at me until I had sorted the whirlwind of emotions inside me out enough to talk to you." Cersei laughed. "And good thing she did. Imagine where we would be now, if you had been too scared to tell me you loved me too, just dancing around each other, both wanting the same thing but neither of us daring to say it." "Isn't that what we did for months?", I smiled. "I tried so hard not to fall for you, because of how complicated it would make everything. Wasn't I supposed to hate you? But I couldn't, no matter how much I convinced myself I didn't like you." 

"It's not like I was being subtle about how I wanted you to feel about me", Cersei chortled indignantly. "That was entirely on you." "Not subtle?", I asked, raising my eyebrows. "You called me a disobedient lap dog the night of the day we first met! Really, that should have told me you loved me, you're right." "Hah, hah." She rolled her eyes, grinning. "You weren't much better. You threatened me, right before you kicked me out of your room." "Not something I would dream of doing now", I smirked and ran a hand over her thigh. "And not something I enjoyed even back then", Cersei replied and picked up my hand to kiss it. "Believe it or not, I was smitten with you the moment I first saw you. Which is why, even without Rhaenys' help, I would have eventually made you give me an answer." "Granted, you did evolve from 'lap dog' rather quickly", I chuckled. "You started calling me 'little cub' instead." I pondered on that for a moment. "You haven't done that in a while." Cersei's hold on my hand grew more firm, and her face became solemn. "That's because you're not so little anymore", she said. "I don't tell you enough how proud I am of you. To call you a cub would be a discredit to your wit and skill. You know how to play the game, and yet you have still managed to keep that good heart of yours - though with a dose of healthy realism to it now. That's something I admire about you, how you can be so clever and still so caring." I felt I should reply, although I had no idea how, but she wasn't done yet anyway. "And another thing I am proud of is to call you my consort. We may not have convinced any septon to wed us yet - even Qyburn won't do it - but you are my Queen Consort in every right. We make the rules now, and I say you have more than earned it. There has never been a woman more deserving of the title." "Is this a proposal?", I smiled in lack of another reply. I did not know how to react to her shower of affection. "Maybe", she shrugged, a knowing smirk playing around her lips. "Would you say yes if it was?" "You already know my answer", I said. "One day, we'll make it happen. Fuck everyone else's disapproval, we could care less. And if I have to force the septon with the gathered might of the Kings- well, Queensguard behind me, we will find a way." She kissed me deeply, and we held each other like that for a long time. But eventually, my thoughts drifted to another subject. Her talk of consorts and disapproval had reminded me of something. "This afternoon, when you hold court in the throne room, don't wait on me", I said. "There's something I need to take care of." She looked at me curiously, visibly burning to know more, but did not press the matter. She nodded. "I will see you after, then." "Oh, you'll see me alright", I smirked cryptically.

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The throne room fell dead silent when I walked in, clad in nothing but a sheer turquoise bedrobe. I ignored everybody's skeptical glances and kept my eyes on Cersei, walking up the steps to the thrones and stopping right in front of her. Still holding her gaze, I let my robe drop to the floor, accompanied by a collective gasp. She looked at me a moment longer with an unreadable expression, then nodded for me to sit beside her, trusting me to know what I was doing. I hoped I really did, for there was no undoing this. Murmuring arose again in the hall, and I felt a hundred eyes on my body, flitting away when they saw me look back at them. I let the excitement go on for a little, then spoke, quieting the mass at once as all eyes turned back to me, wondering what the meaning of this was. "Why do you all look so shocked?", I asked. "This is what I've always been to you, isn't it? At least", I spread my arms in a gesture of nonchalance, "that's what you called me. The whore Queen Consort." I paused and added in a hushed, conciliatory tone, "Not quite my standard now, is it?" I let the words sink in and raised my voice again in feigned lightheartedness. "Well, as queen consort, I feel it is my duty to listen to the people - and the people have spoken. Whore, they called me, so a whore I will be. Look at me now. Is this what you wanted? A queen laid bare before the kingdom, how poetic. But poetry is a funny thing - it's all lies, really, lies and euphemisms and everything that will make our miserable reality a little more bearable for the heart. Because reality can be hard to accept, I understand that: to accept that a woman can love another woman... and that without one of them selling herself out for it, it's a scandalous idea indeed. Not at all one I expect you all to welcome with open arms. But know this: whore or not, I am the consort of the queen, which makes me more powerful than all of you, and places me conveniently close to someone who can take matters such as this into his own hands." I glanced briefly sideways at Gregor Clegane. "So the next time somebody thinks to call me a whore, they might remember what title followed that word. Good afternoon, my honored lords and ladies." Leaving my robe on the floor as a sinister reminder, I got up and walked back out of the throne room with my head held high. This time, no malicious looks followed me, no mocking sneers accompanied my path, only shock and fearful respect were written in the faces I passed.