⚠ Slight content warning for this chapter: themes of su!cide + explicit gore/violence

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Hear those bells ring deep in the soul, chiming away for a moment
Feel your breath course frankly below, see life as a worthy opponent
Today of all days, see
How the most dangerous thing is to love
How you will heal and you'll rise above
Crowned by an overture bold and beyond
It's more courageous to overcome

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ℂ𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕖𝕚 was standing at her balcony, wine glass in hand, looking out over the city. She was wearing an elegant, high-collared dress adorned with chains and beads, rings on her hands, bejeweled pointed shoes - an outfit for a very special occasion. Yet the handmaids dressing her had left half an hour ago, and Cersei was still here. As a matter of fact, so was I, despite having been prepared in similar (though slightly less regal) fashion, and I was beginning to wonder why. Cersei hadn't said a word since telling me to stay, back when I was getting ready to depart for our likely doom at the sept. She was only staring, watching something I couldn't see. "Cersei-" She raised a hand, making me quiet momentarily on instinct, but I had sat in silence for long enough. I got up to stand beside her. "No. You owe me an explanation. We should have been at the sept for our trial about twenty minutes ago, and yet you haven't made a move to leave. Staying away will only make it worse, you know that, right?" Cersei still didn't respond. I grabbed her arm, desperate to get any kind of reaction from her. Finally, she turned her head to look at me. "Just. Watch", she said, sounding strained, as if the mere activity of looking into the distance was stressing her out. Well, at least she had replied at all. I let go of her arm and resolved to watch the city with her. But I couldn't bear this uncertainty. "What are we waiting for?" A beat of silence. The rumble of what I assumed was the sea could be heard from below. Then, finally, Cersei smiled. "Justice." The world before me tore apart in a flash of green. The sound arrived a second later, a resounding boom mingled with the unmistakable screams of perishing humans and what seemed to be bells striking against stone. It took me another few seconds yet to realize what had just occurred. Though it was a shocking scene, I couldn't help but smile too. An eye for an eye. The same amount of people that had scorned her in the streets would now die screaming. Cersei took a sip of her wine and held her face out into the faint wind that was blowing over from the explosion, relishing her revenge. She had been right. This did indeed solve all our problems. I placed a hand on the small of her back. "Good job, darling", I whispered, still smiling. She turned to me, setting her glass aside, took my face into both her hands and kissed me with such a passion as I had rarely felt from her before. I could see a fire dancing in her green eyes that had nothing to do with the one outside. "We've won", she breathed frenziedly, "it's only us left now." Except... "Your son-", I began tentatively. "-wasn't there", Cersei quickly replied. "I made sure of it." She let go of my face, but her wide grin didn't wane. "You know, it was Olenna who gave me the idea. Do you remember, when she asked me if I was going to kill all my enemies by myself? I suppose I should thank her for allowing me to dispose of her pestilent grandchildren." Some feeling of morality deep inside me cringed at hearing this, but it was long buried anyways. Cersei was my sense of justice now, her enemies were my enemies just as her idea of good was mine.

We stayed there for a long time, drinking together on the balcony, admiring the destruction that had saved us. Eventually though, a servant entered, out of breath, urging Cersei to come with him immediately. We both were immediately suspicious, wondering if some member of the Faith had survived and come to hold us accountable, but the man's genuine distress said otherwise. Still, Cersei wisely asked before agreeing to go along, "Why? What is this about?" Although the servant complied, it wouldn't have mattered whether or not he replied. Neither of us could believe his words. "No." Cersei shook her head vehemently, as if that would stop the message from being true. "No, I don't believe it. He- He's fine, he couldn't have gotten out of his room-" "It's true", the servant interjected despite the fact that he was speaking to the queen, whom he should never interrupt. "If you would like to see-" "I'll go", I said, and added more quietly to Cersei, "You stay here. If it's a trap, I'll have Rhaenys to protect me. I'm sure he's lying, or somebody lied to him, just- it'll be okay. I'll be back to tell you what this is all about." Cersei nodded, staring ahead of her without really seeing as she probably pictured the worst case, and sank into an armchair. I squeezed her shoulder reassuringly and followed the man. He took me far down to the cellars the maesters - and Qyburn - used. So far, unfortunately, everything seemed in line with the story he had told. And when I entered the room, I regretted going at all because I'd have to be the one to ultimately break the news to Cersei. There on the table, covered to the neck in a white shroud, lay the young king, one side of his head a mushy mess, his innocent blond curls stained maroon. I turned away, closing my eyes. "Do you wish to return to the queen mother, my lady?", the servant asked softly after a moment. I nodded dejectedly. When I entered, I did not bother to hide my gloom - it was easier than to speak it aloud. As soon as Cersei saw my face, the small spark of hope in her eyes extinguished, and she slumped in on herself, tears welling soundlessly from her eyes. I crouched down before her seat, taking her hands, but she gently pushed me away. "Thank you, but I need to be alone with this first", she said in the smallest voice. "Of course." I got back up, kissed the top of her head and walked to the door. "Just call for me if you need me", I offered, and she nodded without looking up. I wasn't sure she had even really heard me. I would just check in with her again later. It wasn't until I had reached my room on the other side of the eastern wing that a memory struck me like lightning, something Cersei had told me long ago: "If it weren't for my children, I'd have thrown myself from the highest window of the Red Keep. They're the reason I'm alive." She had never wanted to mourn alone before... I whirled around on my heel and rushed back down the way I had come, Rhaenys beside me giving a confused yelp as she struggled to turn on the slippery floor. Please, don't let me be too late. Please don't let this happen.

"Cersei", I yelled as I burst into the room, my heart almost crumbling out of my chest at what I saw. She was standing on the windowsill, turning her head to look at me when she heard me. "Stop", she warned in a broken voice, tears streaming down her face. "Not a step closer, or I'll jump right now." I skidded to a halt. "Don't", I whispered. "Cersei, please, don't do this. You're all I have left in this world. I can't stand the thought of never hearing your voice again, never feeling your warmth against my body again, never seeing your face again first thing in the morning and last thing at night." Tears were welling up in my eyes too now. "I cannot bear the idea of never hearing you laugh again, never listening to you complain about your brothers again, never seeing the love you have for your family again." My voice began to crack from my crying. "It kills me to imagine never smelling the lavender on your skin again, or tasting the wine on your lips again, or feeling your hand on mine again when you tell me everything will be alright." I tried my best to steady my shaking breath. "So if you jump out of that window-" I had to pause for a second to swallow down the building lump in my throat. "-then I'm following after you before you even hit the ground. Because I cannot stand to live in a world without you in it, Cersei Lannister." Slowly, so very slowly, she turned around fully, looking at me through a veil of tears, her face contorted in all the pain she had carried around with her for years and was now ready to set free, and finally, after what felt like an eternity, took a small step down from the sill. I broke out of my freeze and rushed to her, clutching her harder against myself than I had ever held anything or anyone before, heavy sobs shaking both our bodies. She collapsed in my arms, her legs giving out from under her, and I stroked her head as I lowered us both to the ground carefully. "It's okay", I muttered, my voice muffled by her hair, "it's okay." "It's not", she cried. "All my children are gone. Tommen was the only one who remained, and he left me. He left me. He wasn't taken from me like Joffrey and Myrcella, he chose to die. And it's my fault. I thought- I thought I'd have time to show him that Margaery was just manipulating him, that he was better off without her, but he didn't even give me a chance. He just... followed her into the grave." "Just like you were willing to follow him", I said softly. "And like I would have followed you. Love makes fools of us all. And he did love her, regardless of whether or not she truly loved him back. You mustn't fault him for that. He had no one to hold him back in that moment, to show him that life is still worth living." I took a moment to collect my breath; I had been rambling without pause, just needing to get the words out all at once. "We've still got each other, and although Tommen can never be replaced, you have still got his legacy to live for. He left you seven kingdoms, open for the taking. And if you don't take them, someone else will, someone who will not honor his memory nearly as well as you." Easing my hold on Cersei, I lifted her chin so I could look into her eyes. "It's the hardest thing to do, to keep living, but it's also the bravest. It's the best thing to do, a rebellion against life and death itself. Survive out of spite, if for nothing else."

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There was one thing that lifted Cersei's spirits at least for the moment. As we had previously considered, a member of the Faith had indeed survived, though she was far from being a danger to us. No, we were the danger to her. A glass and carafe of wine still in hand from her rooms, Cersei entered the dark chamber near the Black Cells, deep below the Red Keep. This far down, no one would hear your screams. Septa Unella, whose unpleasant acquaintance I had made once before on my escalated visit to Cersei, lay strapped to a table, squinting at the flicker of torchlight as we entered. I could not suppress noting a certain similarity between her and how I had found Tommen earlier that day. With her mouth fixed into a wicked smile, Cersei took her time emptying the carafe over Unella's face. Though sputtering and writhing, the septa remained silent, waiting for Cersei to speak. But it did nothing to hide her fear when Cersei said, "Confess." A tooth for a tooth. "Confess." More wine came down on the woman's head. "Confess." Cersei's tone grew harsher with each time, letting her true resentment show bit by bit. "Confess it felt good: beating me, starving me, frightening me, humiliating me." This was her perfect revenge, the reckoning for all the abuse she had suffered at the hands of these supposedly holy people. "You didn't do it because you cared about my atonement. You did it because it felt good." She wove false sympathy into her voice, almost laughing. "I understand. I do things because they feel good." Cersei began pacing around the table with the placidity of someone who had all the time in the world, running her hand over Unella's shaking body here, fondling her restraints there. "I drink because it feels good. I killed my husband because it felt good to be rid of him. I fucked my brother and my cousin because it felt good, I fuck her-", she gestured to me, "-because it feels good to feel her inside me." Absurd as it was in this situation, I blushed. It just felt so nice to be able to say this to someone so openly for once, even if it was to torture them. "I lied about fucking my brother because it felt good to keep our children safe from hateful hypocrites." I could hear the underlying pain in her voice, try as she might to hide it. That wound was still too fresh. The next part was what really hurt the septa in turn, though. "I killed your High Sparrow and all his little sparrows, all his septons and all his septas, all his filthy soldiers, because it felt good to watch them burn." I couldn't tell what I enjoyed more about this: Unella finally getting what she deserved or the low rasp of Cersei's voice that made my core burn. "It felt good to imagine their shock and their pain." She chuckled. "No thought has ever given me greater joy." That was a lie, I knew that, but it served the dramatic effect wonderfully. The septa was squirming beneath her words. Cersei chuckled again. "Even confessing feels good under the right circumstances", she smiled. Unella shied away from the hand Cersei put on her cheek, but she couldn't move far. "You've always been quiet." 

This was my cue. I silently motioned for Rhaenys, who had been half-heartedly exploring the small chamber, to stand by my side while Cersei spoke on. "I said my face would be the last thing you saw before you died, do you remember?" "Good", the septa said. "I'm glad to see your face. I'm ready to meet the gods." "What? Now? Today?", Cersei asked, incredulous. "You're not going to die today", she laughed, "you're not going to die for quite a while." Unella's momentarily serene expression melted away and Cersei stepped aside to let me get closer. I tilted my head, watching the septa's fearful face. "I hear your gods are all about embracing your mistakes and atoning for them. Well, you made a grave mistake when you hurt Cersei. You see, she's not the only one who enjoys revenge", I said and turned to my right. "Up, Rhaenys." The direwolf jumped onto the table, standing menacingly over Unella's body with bared teeth. "Somebody once told me that I am a cub." I shot a quick affectionate glance over at Cersei. "It was meant endearingly. Cubs are cute, right? But you will find very soon-" With one hand, I made a gesture to Rhaenys. The other I used to hold the septa's leg down. "-that cubs have teeth too." Rhaenys' jaws closed around Unella's calf, and the woman screamed out. My wolf bit harder, I heard bone crunch and saw blood oozing over the now slightly odd angle of the leg. "Careful, girl, we don't want her to die too quickly", I said, scratching behind Rhaenys' ears as if she was just playing with a toy. "Let go." Immediately, the direwolf obeyed, leaving the ravaged calf to bleed freely. I indicated for her to move over. When she stood beside the septa's arm, I nodded once to signal her free reign. She dug in eagerly, not in the slightest bit deterred by Unella's cries. I let her continue for a while, but when she tore out a chunk of flesh, I knew it was time to stop. There was still supposed to be some of the septa left for Cersei's other punishments. So I called Rhaenys off, the mangled limb dropping down uselessly, and let Cersei know with a nod that I was done. "Ser Gregor", she called out, and a moment later the door opened. Turning back to Unella, she explained with a smirk, "This is Ser Gregor Clegane. He's quiet too." The resurrected Mountain removed his helm. "Your gods have forsaken you. This is your god now." Cersei turned, letting Rhaenys and me pass so she'd be last. "Shame", she repeated loudly as she closed the door on the wailing septa, "Shame!"

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He left you seven kingdoms, open for the taking. The grand doors creaked open to reveal Cersei, resplendent in a shimmering black gown, not dissimilar to the one she had worn on the balcony. A chain was suspended between silver shoulder pads reminiscent of armor, like that of the intimidating guards flanking her, with Ser Gregor in the lead. She looked every bit the monarch her husband and sons had been, more so, even. The throne room was dead silent as she advanced. Cersei approached the Iron Throne with an unwavering gaze, but she already knew I was there in the front row, waiting for her. It was the closest I could get to being by her side for this. It wasn't easy for her to take the place of her deceased family so soon, just like that. She had always wanted the throne, but not like this. Not at that price. Still, it was the right choice. I knew she would be a good queen, and she would enjoy it, in time. With a somber expression that, to the clueless onlooker, could pass as ceremonial, Cersei lifted her skirts and walked up the few steps to the throne, standing in front of it to face the room. Qyburn stepped forward, a cushion with a newly fashioned crown on it in hand. "I now proclaim Cersei of the House Lannister, First of Her Name, Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Protector of the Seven Kingdoms." He lifted the crown and slowly raised it to her head, making the ritualistic moment last. It was fashioned in the vague likeness of a lion upon a wreath, mane spreading in all directions like silver sunbeams. Sanctioned and crowned, Cersei sat down on the throne. She looked like she had been born to it. After giving the crowd a moment to take her in, Qyburn prompted, "Long may she reign!" The people responded in kind. "Long may she reign!", I shouted at the top of my lungs with as much fervor as I could muster, and I was certain my voice could be heard well over the rest of the crowd. I wanted to applaud, but no one else did, so I resolved to just smile at Cersei as hard as I could until she would look over. The pride swelling up in my heart for her was immense. There she sat, looking so naturally regal and flawless. Cersei, the queen. My queen.