"Mal." I whispered at the boy who stood before me. He looked better then I had ever seen him. All angelic like. Glowing like pure light. I looked to my surroundings to see we were both surrounded my thin, gold clouds. I couldn't tell where this place was. Or why Mal was standing before me, right now. "Hey Alina."

"Where are we?"

"Your dreams, my love."

My heart sunk deep inside my chest. He wasn't really here. He's dead. Still.

"Alina you need to live."

"Why Mal? I can't live, without you. Please Mal, come back to me." My voice cracking at the end. Tears flowing freely from my eyes. I saw Mal, keep his sincere smile on his face. He walked up to me and caressed my face. "Alina, I have to be here. You need to live. For your Crown. For your country. For Ravka. For Westeros. For yourself."

"You need to wake up, you need to fight. Don't kill yourself Alina. I want you to live, to live the life that was denied to you."

"I can't do it alone."

"You won't be alone."

He leaned in closer to my face. "I love you Queen Alina." He then kissed me. It felt as If I was kissed by pure air.

"Now wake up."

I shot up in bed, breathing heavily. Sweat running across my forehead, down my back. I blinked, coming clear to my surroundings and trying to calm myself down. I curled myself into a ball, feeling the covers slip down my legs. When I relaxed from the supernatural dream, I looked to my side, over the boarder of pillows, to see the Darkling asleep, quite peacefully.

Some how seeing him sleep, so much like a child, calmed me down. A lock of his silky, black hair, fell over his face. I leaned over the pillows, and brushed the lose hair away from his handsome face. I smiled lightly at his appearance. I stroked the side of his face slightly, resting my palm on his cheek. I heard him 'hmm' slightly, as if he was enjoying the touch. Suddenly, I snapped back to reality when I remembered who was next to me. Mal's murderer.

I have to do what Mal wanted. I have to live.

***
A couple of days went past and I usually went about a schedule specifically designed by the Darkling. Like always, most of the time–actually all of the time, I was supervised. Not an inch of privacy, or freedom. Riya always helped to dress and clean me. But the Darkling would take over, right after she was done.

This morning after I bathed, I let Riya go out early from the Darkling's chambers. As I exited the bathrooms, I dried my hair with a towel. The wet ends of my hair tickled my neck, as It lay on the side of my shoulder. Seeing the wet layers, slowly, turn to dry silky ones.

The dress I wore had laces in the back, over the exposed part of my skin. I let them lose for now. I soon felt a pair of familiar hands on my back. I gasped, shocked at the touch. I could tell from the amplifying ability, it was the Darkling.

I immediately spun around to face his eyes. I didn't even hear him come up to me "What are you doing?" The Darkling's face showed no apparent emotion. I could tell he wasn't going to answer me properly. I made to walk away from him but he grabbed my shoulders, spinning me back into his chest. My breathing became uncontrollable, by the quick action.

He leaned into my neck, slightly under my ear. I remember him doing the same thing before he took off my cloak and we entered the fold together. Where he used the antler collar. I gulped slightly. I think he felt that. As I could feel his warm breath down my neck. "Why do you always assume I'm going to do something terrible to you, Alina?" He whispered, specifically on my name.

I couldn't tell what the emotion was behind his words. Was it exhaustion from the accusations? Was it jealousy because of Mal or Nikolai? Was it seduction? Or more of a cryptic threat. I gasped out of my thoughts, as I looked into the mirror before me and saw the Darkling observing my reaction as I felt him tie the laces of my dress.

My shoulders tensed from the contact, breath taken away from the touch. I hate how much his touch disgusted me, and flattered me at the same time. I closed my eyes slightly, attempting to forget the emotions behind the touch. I then remembered how the Darkling was on the drop of my shoulder, observing my reaction.

He was done a minute ago. But his hands were still down my back. I felt his hands move up to my shoulders, I slightly shivered as he touched the revealing skin on my back. I then felt them burn through my skin as he skimmed down my arms, in a featherlight touch. The Darkling's hands then grasped my elbows. Harshly. Forcing me away from my ludicrous thoughts.

He caged me into him, having control over my breathing. I could feel his kefta poke my back. "You look beautiful Alina." He whispered huskily, slightly seductive. I didn't imagine the Darkling to be like this. But he always had an alternative reason for doing what he did. Right now it must be to seduce me, keep me under him. So I would be next to him.

I then felt him kiss the side of my neck slightly, snapping me out of my thoughts. I closed my eyes in disgust. I felt his hand grab my jaw and gently lift it up, giving him complete access to my neck. He didn't really kiss my neck, more like his breath wavered around it. A funny feeling, burned inside me. But this couldn't continue. "No, p-please." I begged him to stop. Concerned that he would kiss my neck. He stopped and looked at my reflection. "Beg again." He whispered with a smile tugging at his lips. "Please, it hurts."

He turned my face slightly to him, to see my face closely. I think he was observing the fear I held in my eyes if he continued to touch me. I saw a small crease in his eye brows. He then stroked the side of my face gently. I glanced at his fingers, feeling his ring skim down my face. My eyes met back with his. "Are you really afraid of me touching you, Alina?" He asked quietly, the sincerity dripping of his voice. As if me refusing him, hurt him deeply.

"Yes." I whispered. Answering his question. I saw him take his bold, offended face. He squinted his eyes and tightened his lips. He then grasped the back of my hair possessively and pulled me in by my waist. His lips came closer to my face, slightly near my ear.

"But you would let Mal touch you like this wouldn't you Princess, and do a lot more." His eyes glanced down at my neck then back up to my eyes.

"I'm betting Nikolai would get the same consent too."

Was he questioning my chastity? I squinted my eyes at him and a familiar rage consumed rose inside of me like a phoenix rising from the ashes. It was the same rage I felt after he killed Mal.

I moved out of his touch and made to slap him. He caught my wrist easily and swiftly. "Channel that anger Alina, use it as self discipline. Not in spite against me."

The Darkling let go of my wrist with a harsh force. He exited his chambers. Was this toxic version of romance just a test?

Feeling overwhelmed by the Darkling I proceeded on with my scheduled tasks.

Published: 20:49pm 05/02/2022