Nikolai opened his doors for me and pulled me in. He then locked the door behind me. My heart started to race rapidly. My breathing increased. I looked around his room and to his bed. It wasn't decorated in any flowers or any sort of marital décor.

Nikolai came up to me and sat me down on the edge of his bed. He sat down next to me. He hesitated before he talked. "I am sure you are aware of what is to happen right?"

I nodded knowingly, biting my lower lip and clinging onto my robe. "I won't do anything without your consent, now or after our wedding."

"But you could get um–" He started to say, scratching the back of his neck. I squinted my eyes at him, "With child?" I shook my head at him. "Don't worry I can't get pregnant and I do not want to have any children."

It was true. My life wouldn't permit me losing 9 months of valuable time. Getting the throne, stopping the Darkling and returning to the Dothraki is my main priority. Children are a burden and a waist of precious time.

Nikolai smiled, "Thank the saints, I have no desire for children."

He didn't say anything after, letting the awkward atmosphere surround us, till it consumed us entirely. "Would you want to..." He trailed of, I knew what he wanted to say next. Did I want him in me? I missed Mal's touch, maybe he could suffice. Only for a night. But would It be right?

"You could just kiss me." I declared. He nodded. Then he started to remove my robe, letting it fall to the floor. He gently pushed me to the top of the bed, where I rested between the silky  pillows. He kissed my lips. I felt the rush of the mysterious bond surge in me. He deepened the kiss as I moaned into his mouth. He pulled apart and looked into my eyes. "Tell me when you want me to stop."

"Okay." I whispered. He began to kiss me again till he moved down my jawline. His hand came to navigate down my body and lift up one of my legs, till it bent in an arch. I pulled of his crème shirt and saw his gorgeous abs up close. "Nikolai." I breathed trembling right under him. He peeled of my black lace and soon I felt the cold on my naked body. He kissed me softly. I grasped his hair as he started to bite into my skin. He soon reached down in between my legs, "Your so wet." Then I felt him lick into my clit. I released a moan. I let my arms rest on either side as he slipped a finger into me. "My Alina." He whispered as he slipped another finger into me. Nikolai kissed up the sides of my thighs.

My mind briefly went back to the Darkling. It won't satisfy you. Like always he found the perfect thing to say to taunt me. I wanted to prove the Darkling wrong. See him mad as I told him I loved every second of tonight.

"Nikolai." I stopped him. He rose his head, "Did I do something wrong, love?" I shook my head. "I think I'm ready."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

He kissed me passionately, which I returned. He then slipped of his leather and I saw his cock. "I promise it won't hurt... much." His cock glided up my thighs and I felt his tip slide into me. I moaned. He slowly pushed his way into me. I grasped the covers as my moaning began to increase rapidly. "Faster, oh." I begged him. He pushed all the way in. "N-Nikolai."

"My King." I closed my eyes as he groaned into my neck. He pinned my wrists up to the bed board. "Queen Alina." He whispered in my ear. "Only mine."

My hips rested against him as he pulled out of me and groaned as he lay down next to me. I panted heavily. So did he. "You okay? I did not hurt you did I?"

"No. I've been fucked before. But never like this." I whispered back to him. I pulled a cover on me and turned to meet Nikolai's eyes. He gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, before he pulled me in on his chest and I felt sleep befall me.

***
The next morning I woke up with sour thighs. I looked up to see Nikolai's sleeping face glowing in the sunshine. I gently stroked his cheek and ran a thumb over a golden lock of his hair. He slept so peacefully as if there were no nightmares to plague his dreams, no trauma to haunt at night. But I knew otherwise he was relaxed from what we did last night.

Gently, I slipped out from under his arms and went over to pick up my clothes of the floor. I quickly made it to my room where I flopped onto my bed.

"I cannot believe I just did that." I murmured into my pillow. Leaving the bedroom to go bathe was the best choice. I quickly relaxed myself in the waters and even ducked my head right under. I scrubbed off any traces of dirt and Nikolai of me. Truth be told, I don't believe I wanted to be pleasured by Nikolai.

Perhaps I just go caught in the moment and am now regretting it. I hate him. I don't know why but I do. His flirting, the comments he makes. The way I lose my breath around him is infuriating. Once I finished bathing, I quickly dressed myself and went outside the manor.

The carriages the Darkling promised me had arrived at noon and I said farewells to all the women we rescued. Though many had doubts and why shouldn't they.

One Squaller even came up to me. "Sun Summoner, I would like to thank you for saving all of us." She pointed out to the women behind her, who were ready to enter the carriages. "It was no problem at all. Women, Grisha or not, need to stick together in a world dominated by men." I stated. The Squaller and most of the Grisha agreed with what I said. "We are eternally indebted to you and you alone. Whenever you need us we'll be there." An Inferni said to me, with a pleasant smile on her face.

I looked behind to see Zoya and Genya watching. "Actually there is one thing. I know you are all being sent to the Little Palace but the General is in the Grand Palace right over. And the General is the black heretic." I made it known to everyone. Telling them about the fold, how the Darkling used me and what his real intentions were. Many refused to believe it but once I showed them the shadow abilities the Darkling gave me. They knew about the connection between us and the misery of the bond.

"I would need spies of my own in his presence."

"Would any of you be up to that?"

"Would any of you like to be my army?"

They all looked at each other then at me. The tension was high and I knew that they would likely say no. Perhaps some of them were loyal to the Darkling and chose the fear of him instead of peace with me.

The Squaller smiled at me, "I'm in!"

"Me too!" An Inferni said. Most of the women present nodded. "Thank you."

"I will not ask of anything from you all right now. But please keep your eyes and ears open in case the Darkling is planning something."

"We will–Sun Queen." The dirty-blonde Inferni agreed.

Many had agreed with what I was saying. The Grisha were ready to depart. Some Heartrenders and healers, I recognised were there to ride with them. Even Nadia went with them. Though she came to me first.

"Please be safe and keep my army safe too." I pleaded, hugging her tightly. She looked more refreshed and more like herself today. She pulled apart from the hug. "I will. I promise, we'll be training but also spying."

"Do not underestimate the Darkling, he would know I would have something planned and would have a counter attack ready. I can't risk you all, potentially, dying." I said concerned. My eyes glanced down for a second as a wave of concern washed over me. They're deaths would really be my fault not the Darkling's. I cannot send them into battle with death a certainty.

"Don't worry I promise no one would end up like Marie again. We are honoured to be your army."

Marie?

"What happened to Marie?"

"You didn't know."

I shook my head.

"The General made sure to have two black keftas ready for the Winter Fete. It ended up with Marie getting killed in the fitting room." Nadia explained with a sad tone.

Blood rushed away from my face as I gasped in the shock. No one told me of this. Not even Genya–she could have been preoccupied but I didn't know.

"I-I assumed she went to the front lines." my voice broke as I released a sob.

"I'm sorry."

"I know." Nadia whispered.

***
Nikolai led me to the lake in the shady Park. This is where I took my morning horse rides, alone or with Zoya.

The atmosphere was quiet and the peaceful tranquillity made me want to get lost in it forever. A place where I could get away from everything that concerned me as Grisha or a princess.

"Nikolai what are you doing?" I asked as he took of his leather vest and pulled of his shirt. I didn't turn away as I have seen him naked last night. He was planning to romance me even further.

He started swimming in the lake and dipped himself in the refreshing waters.

"Come on in lovely, the waters are perfect."

I folded my arms, "Yeah–no that's not happening."

"No one would see us here, you could wear my shirt or come in naked if your comfortable." I observed the area around us, it was pretty secluded and decided it's better to wear at least something then going in naked. "Fine."

Hesitantly, I took of my flats. Nikolai watched me as I undressed, "a little privacy would be nice." He gave me a small smile, then disappeared under the waters. I pulled down the lace dress that I wore and quickly slipped on Nikolai's dark shirt–it barely reached down my hips. Aside from bathing naked in the water fall, this was the most undressed I've been in the outdoors.

"Okay I'm ready." Nikolai's head bobbed up from the waters like a wine bottle in a sea of ice. His mouth gaped a little. "What?"

"You look much better in it then me." He complemented. The Darkling said the same thing when I accidentally wore his robe. At that moment I saw it in his eyes, the lust to kiss me, the will to bed me.

Nikolai offered me his hand, I bent down on the edge of the lake and dipped my feet in. The waters were lukewarm. Nikolai soon picked me up by my waist and drenched my entire figure into the water. I closed my eyes, trying to get used to the fabric clinging to my body.

Swimming was never my strong suit, but it was enjoyable. I splashed some water on Nikolai and so did he. We laughed and enjoyed the swim. My mind wondered over to a certain topic. "Nikolai?"

"Hmm."

"Do you have anyone you love?" I asked pathetically. The way he flirted with me, the way he's romancing me made me believe that he was. Well... I think he was. But I felt the same way about the Darkling–I refuse to believe that this was genuine.

"I do. Myself!" He swam forwards.

"Then what do you do to me." I asked quietly.

"What do you mean?"

"The romance from last night, right now. The flirty comments that eye thing that you do. The way you call me love or princess." I listed as he swam ever so close to me. "I guess that's just how I am princess." And then he kissed me.

He dipped us in the lake then we pulled apart when we reached the surface.

***
Published: 10:20am 14/04/2022