*warning strong language and smut*

When everything else fails, love should feel secure but wild. 

- adaptation on a quote of r.h. sin

+ + + +

Nellie nervously followed Sweet Pea up the stairs of their trailer. Unspoken things were hanging between them. Unspoken feelings, confrontations yet to happen. It was unmistakeable, like heading straight into a thunderstorm.

As the door locked behind her, Nellie waited. She didn't dare to look at Sweet Pea, afraid that she might be disappointed in his reaction. Sure, he looked at her like he wanted to ravish her, but he also ignored her for most of the day. 

Instead, Sweet Pea walked around her, careful not come too close to her. He snatched two glasses from the cabinets and filled them with the whiskey standing on the counter. He wordlessly held out a glass to her. The shadows across his face wavered as the wind outside rustled the trees standing in front of the street lantern outside the trailer. 

"This is fucked up." Sweet Pea declared as if it were a toast before downing the drink. As he reached for a refill, Nellie herself took a sip off the amber liquid. The alcohol burned her throat, warming every frozen limb in her body. The tension immediately eased from her muscles. She hadn't even noticed how cramped they'd been.

The image of a dark silhouette against bright light momentarily flashed before her eyes. With a slight tremble, Nellie placed the glass back onto the small table. It only took her two steps to reach it. 

How Sweet Pea and his brother had managed to inhabit the small space as two grown men, remained a mystery to her. Even now, it was hard not to sense Sweet Pea's temper waver around him, indecisive on how to feel. 

Nellie leaned against the table, trying to regain her balance. She quickly  glanced at the tall Serpent. His brooding eyes were focused on a point somewhere on the wall. The glass dangled in the air between his fingers and his lips. Her own mouth ached for their touch. 

But not even their physical affection could overcome the heavy silence in the room. Whereas moments ago, Nellie entertained the thought of dragging him straight to the bed, she wondered if perhaps she should seek the comfort of the small bedroom in the corner of the trailer after all. 

Finally making a decision, Sweet Pea pushed himself off the counter. A hand quickly ran over his tired face, just as Nellie was about to head for her former bedroom. They both remained frozen in the cramped kitchen area of the trailer. 

"Nellie," the way he said her name made her hesitate. A finger absentmindedly reached for the edge of the counter as she tried to focus on something else then the goosebumps Sweet Pea caused on her arms by merely saying her name. 

Slowed down by her hesitation, she looked up. Once more did the intensity of his gaze blow all the air out of her lungs. Sweet Pea was such a raging mess of emotions, it was hard to pinpoint exactly what he was feeling. She could practically see the fight within him pass through his eyes.

"God, Nellie," Sweet Pea whispered, his tall form slightly slumping as he finally crossed the distance between them as if his last resistance was crumpling where he stood. He wrapped his arms around her, pressed her against his chest just like he had when he'd pulled her away from the Black Hood's aim. The memory was painfully fresh. 

Nellie could feel his heart pounding in his chest. She couldn't help herself but wrap her own arms around his torso, glad for his support. The scent of pine needles and cigarettes wrapped around her, making her dizzy by its proximity. 

"I don't know what to do with you," Sweet Pea whispered, his breath fanning over her head. Confused Nellie pulled away slightly, enough for her to face him. He looked at her quizzically. His thumb removed a strand of hair and tucked it safely behind her ear. 

"If not for being Lodge's daughter then for the simple fact that you lied to me..." he started. His eyes were scanning over her face, as if trying to memorise every single freckle. "I should hate you. I should not want to be this close to you." He looked back down. His eyes were accusing his body for its treacherous desire to have Nellie near. 

Nellie swallowed, trying to get a coherent thought as the gang member rambled on. "You drive me crazy..." he continued. Now that the words came, there was nothing stopping him. "How can I stay away from something that feels so good?" He looked up to her, desperate to find an answer in her brown eyes. 

"For some wicked reason, I don't want to lose you." he finally whispered, his eyes averted to the ground. "For some reason, the thought of not being with you is much worse than the thought of being with you."

Nellie forgot she had a voice as Sweet Pea in front of her was eagerly searching for the right words to express his feelings. He straightened his back, his hand slowly cupping her cheek. "I was so mad at you... God... but when that madman opened the fire..." he shook his head at the thought of what could've happened. 

"No matter what, I just couldn't let you get hurt." His eyes were showing the vulnerable side of Sweet Pea. Big and open, unlike their usual scrutinising and squinting, they revealed the fear of the possibility that Nellie might've been shot. 

"So..." Nellie tried, her mouth suddenly dry. "I assume I'm not just a way to warm your bed?" the painful ache of earlier that evening suddenly replayed by her mind. She didn't want to admit that he'd hurt her every time he'd looked away.

She looked so innocent and sincere, Sweet Pea couldn't help himself and let out an unbelieving chuckle. "Fuck no," he whispered, letting his forehead rest against hers. "You're so much more, Nellie. You're driving me insane but I want you. God, I want you in every way there is to want a person."

Unable to form a coherent word that could compete with Sweet Pea's, Nellie finally closed the distance. Her hands grabbed his face, pulling him closer as she let her lips say everything she wanted to. 

Sweet Pea didn't hesitate to follow her lead. In his effort to get closer to her, he pressed her against the kitchen counter. Gasping, Sweet Pea used the momentum to lift Nellie up, standing in between her spread legs. Nellie dug her fingers into his back, pressing him closer to her.

Sweet Pea groaned as she averted her lips and started slowly making her way down his neck in greedy kisses. Her teeth scraped against his skin, causing a moan to tumble from his lips. His hands wrapped around her hips, pulling her closer to where he needed her. She couldn't help but smirk against his skin as she felt him fidget with the hem of her shirt. Pulling away, she allowed him to take it off. 

As soon as the fabric hit the ground, his fingertips left a hot trail as he made his way over her stomach to her chest. His fingers grazed the simple jersey fabric of her bra, causing Nellie to press her chest closer to him. Instead, his hands followed her ribcage until he easily unclasped the garment and tossed it next to her deserted shirt. 

Eager to let her own fingers feast on his skin, Nellie pulled at his shirt until Sweet Pea too was standing bare chested in front of her. Holding him off for just a bit, Nellie admired his toned figure. Her fingers trailed between the dents of his abs, enough for Sweet Pea to go crazy underneath her touch. A contented sigh escaped her parted lips before Sweet Pea crashed his mouth down to hers again.

Hungry for more, Sweet Pea pulled Nellie of the counter. A satisfied giggle escaped her when she landed on the soft mattress of his bed. As they continued, their minds forgot about all the misery of the last couple of days. They were the only ones existing in the safety of their small trailer. 

Fidgeting with the buttons of her jeans, Sweet Pea unlocked his lips for a moment. Muttering curses under his panted breaths, he succeeded in unbuttoning the tight pair of jeans. Nellie kicked off her battered sneakers, before Sweet Pea urged her pants to follow. Laying barely naked on the bed, she batted her long lashes. Lust clouded her eyes, anticipating whatever pleasure would follow. 

Instead of returning to her mouth, Sweet Pea let his mouth descend to her calve. Leaving tender, heated kisses as he worked himself higher. Nellie shut her eyes close at his touch. Her heartbeat pulsed through her, sending her in hums and moans as Sweet Pea nearly reached his destination. 

Shifting uncomfortably as he sat up again, leaving her damp core neglected, Nellie squinted at his tall figure. Impatient and eager to get rid of the tension building in her lower stomach, she lurched forward. Her mouth crashed hard on his as she pulled him on top of her, needing him so much closer. 

Luckily, Sweet Pea himself was not in the mood for teasing. One slight stroke against Nellie and he himself was longing to give into his desires. His boots thumped onto the simple wooden floor, the sound mixing with their ragged breaths. Soon they were accompanied by the clinking of his belt onto the ground. The trailer filled with the sound of names being echoed to each other, pants and moans filling the spaces between them. 

Ultimately they lay flat on their backs, both searching for their breath. Too drunk on their entangled encounter, Nellie drowsily let her head rest on Sweet Pea's bicep. Endeared by his presence, she looked up, only to see him staring back at her. His cheeks were slightly flushed, their bright pink almost reaching the dark ink on his neck.

"Where should I get mine?" Nellie wondered out loud, her fingers tracing the double headed serpent permanent inked on his skin. Sweet Pea nuzzled his nose between her dark strands of hair. His long fingers traced her stomach, encircling her belly button before settling on her hip. 

"Here?" he asked, his eyebrows quipped in question. Nellie let out a giggle as his touch caused her abs to tense up. "Or maybe here?" He continued his journey as his finger ran across her ribcage to rest just beneath her breast. His lips pressed against her forehead as she squirmed underneath his touch, ticklish as he followed the line of her chest to rest on the bone between her breasts. Laying his hand flat onto her midriff, he pressed himself closer to her side.

"Anywhere really," he muttered in her ear, "As long as I'll be the first to see it." 

A/N

Okay, so this kind of happened. Still quite uncomfortable with writing scenes like this, but tell me what you think! I promise the book will not turn into some Fifty Shades of Riverdale kind of fiction but perhaps I might include some more intimate moments in the upcoming chapters! (p.s. this might be the longest chapter of this book yet, actually)