( TW: a racial slur is nearly said but the character (i'm sure you can guess who goes to say it) is cut off by someone else so it's not completely said. a homophobic slur is actually said in regards to a main character, so be warned. )

Young Steph
July 3rd, 1960

While almost an entire month had passed since the Officer Nell incident, Steph was still fairly distant from the rest of the group. Whenever she would meet up with them to play games, she would often sit to the side and knit a small shirt or sweater with the yarn she brought along with her. Sometimes, they would be in precise patterns: tree by tree, tree by tree... or purple then pink or pink then purple. But, other times, it would become rather messy, like pink then purple but followed by orange and brown.

Whenever one of the Losers pointed out that her knitting was out of sync, she would ignore them and keep going but with an entranced expression... almost as if they weren't even there. Afterwards, they wouldn't dare bother her out of worry that she would snap at them again like she had the month before.

Another thing that the group – especially Amber, Justin, and Bill – noticed were the dark circles beneath Steph's pretty eyes. She looked as though she had not slept in years or that she hadn't slept at all in her whole life. Whenever she would look at them, they would shrink away from her tired gaze, scared to bring the concerned question her way.

The only time she would come to life was when she was knitting, since she seemed wholeheartedly concentrated on the task. Her mother had definitely brought her up to be a talented knitter who could use it to her advantage one day. She could have even run a handmade clothing business or store and become successful that way or this could have just been a hobby of hers forever. The way her hands seemed to move inhumanly fast when she sewed or knitted and the way she wouldn't even glance at what she was doing sometimes... it was enough to impress the whole group.

The next time she truly came back to herself was that July afternoon, as she and her friends hung out at the gravel pit neighboring the Barrens. From where she sat on the edge of the balcony of a small abandoned trailer home, she was barely able to see a glimpse of the quarry not too far away and the greenish water below it.

Her hands continued knitting away at a makeshift pair of socks. She didn't even care that her hands were red and worn thanks to the needle poking her skin repeatedly if she messed up, all she wanted was to finish the job at hand. She was completely zoned out from the others, even when Richie placed his music stereo on the slim railing of the balcony, causing the sun's rays to reflect in her direction.

"T-Take that th-thing d-d-d-own, Ruh-Ruh-Richie," said Bill as he raised his hand to shield his eyes. "It's gonna buh-blind m-m-me."

"Sure thing, Bill," Richie replied as he moved the stereo to a shaded area whilst Little Richard emanated from it in quiet droves.

Bill then spared a glance in Steph's direction and, for the first time in weeks, the blonde felt heat rise to her face as she peered away from him in a shy manner. Her doing this caused Bill to also look away from her as he felt a fluttering sensation in his heart.

"Guys..." Bill spoke up afterwards, making the others turn to look at him. "Remember when I wuh-wanted to tell you guys some-something last month? I for-forgot but here it is. Luh-Last month... in J-J-J-J-Georgie's room... I was looking at his o-o-old scruh-scrapbook. And I went to a pih-picture of him. And... it blinked... it wuh-winked at me. And bluh-blood poured out of it."

Steph visibly winced as she leaned back in pure surprise. So maybe I'm not crazy at all, she thought.

"I saw something, too," Richie added. "I saw a werewolf... a big, giant werewolf... that day in the school's basement. And then it turned into a clown."

"I saw it, too!" exclaimed Eddie. "In the showers at school. It came out of the drain!"

"I saw blood..." Beverly murmured. "It came out of my bathroom sink... and... it splattered all over me!"

"I saw my dead dad... and then he turned into a clown... just like with you guys," said Ben.

"I haven't seen anything at all," Amber admitted.

"Me neither..." said Justin.

"I didn't see the clown in person..." Steph spoke up more clearly while lowering one of the knitted socks, nearly shying away from their gazes at her. "It was in a dream.... But it was real all the same. I saw... I saw... I saw the clown... murdering Velma Daniels..." Her eyes welled with tears as she lowered her head in terror, although she was relieved to finally tell her friends this. "He... He t-tore her apart! He... ripped her limb from fucking limb!"

Bill was instantly by the girl's side, pulling her into a hug and resting his head on top of hers as she burst into tears. Amber and Beverly followed suit, also hugging her in response to hearing this. Justin, who was sitting directly next to the blonde, placed a hand on her back to console her as best as he could.

Stan, on the other hand, sighed heavily. "You guys must have been hallucinating," he said. "That's not possible!"

"Well, you're not the one who had to witness the murder of a child, smart guy!" Steph shouted harshly through her tears before closing her eyes and finally leaning into Bill's embrace as he hugged her tighter.

"I'm just glad I'm not the o-only one who saw something," Bill added.

"It wasn't a clown for me at first," Richie clarified. "It was a werewolf."

"I didn't see a werewolf, just a clown," Eddie said.

"Duh-Don't you see?" said Bill. "I-It was a werewolf for Richie because of that duh-duh-dumb movie we saw."

"But it was a clown underneath," Richie said again.

"So maybe it's some kind of evil being that can read our minds and take the shape of the stuff we're afraid of," Ben then explained.

"And that's what happened to all the kids around here," Beverly said in response.

"Yeah, get serious," scoffed Stan.

"Then why didn't any of us say anything?" Richie asked.

"Because we were afraid we were crazy," Steph guessed, which made the others nod.

"Such a thing just isn't empirically possible," Stan said once more.

Eddie shook his head in determination in reply. "Real... it was so real!"

"Yeah, Stan, it almost had my guts for garters," said Richie.

"It was probably just the influence of the movie," Stan tried to logistically say, choosing not to believe a word they were saying.

"Couldn't it be just some crazy guy dressed up in a clown suit?" Eddie then asked out of curiosity.

"It's not, Eddie," Steph reasoned as she wiped her tears away. "I'm sorry but it isn't. It's more than that."

"I-It's some kind of monster," Bill agreed. "And it's right here in Derry."

Steph sat in shocked silence for a very long time as she tilted her head in thought. That made so much more sense now; a monster taking the shape of their worst fears. Despite that not happening for her yet, she was sure it would very soon if not today. There was only one thing in that world that terrified her more than anything in her most horrific nightmares...

And that was herself....

An image entered her mind then... one that had repeated in her dreams numerous times: it was of a silhouetted figure with its arms outstretched as a form of... energy, it seemed... flowed towards their hands. Their eyes were whiter than the brightest stars in the night sky and said figure wore a silvery gown that fell down their body as if in gorgeous tresses of hair....

"We cuh-can't go to the p-p-police," Bill then said aloud, causing Steph to look back at him out of confusion. "We c-ca-han't g-go to our puh-huh-harents, either. Unless..." He then looked towards Richie. "What a-a-about your m-mom and d-dad, Richie? They suh-seem p-pretty reh-reh-regular."

"My good man," Richie responded in one of his Voices; Steph recognized it to be Toodles the English Butler. "You obviously have no understanding whatsoever of my mother and father." Before one of the others could beep him, he then switched back to regular Richie. "In other words, they'd think I was ready for Juniper Hill. My folks are okay, but they'd never believe anything like this."

"W-What a-a-about other kih-kids?"

"Who?" Stan replied in a skeptical tone. "I wouldn't think of anyone else I trust."

"The closest I can think is my own parents... but I'm not sure," Steph said.

"I'M GONNA BURY YOU!!!" a male voice then bellowed from the distance, causing Steph to jump slightly from being startled.

"Oh shit..." she whispered harshly.

"Henry Bowers..." Eddie groaned in frustration and worry.

"Duh-Dummy up, all of you!" Bill suddenly demanded of them. "S-S-Suh-homething's g-g-gonna h-h-happen."

"With what, Bill?!" Amber replied in response.

"Ruh-Ruh-Rocks. A-A-Ammo!"

While some of the others instantly jumped to his aid, Amber was a lot more hesitant. She was seconds away from gathering Justin in her arms and taking off back home while carrying him. She knew he wasn't cut out for anything scary to him like this. After all, any bit of interaction with new people – especially bullies – would normally have been enough to put him through a nervous breakdown.

Knowing this, she turned her head to stare at him. "Do you want to head home, kid?" she asked tentatively.

Justin, although his eyes held fear in them, shook his head immediately. "I'm not leaving you," was all he said.

Amber nodded before pushing Justin to be behind her and grabbing a few graveled stones into her rough-ish hands.

Seconds later, a young boy around their age with very dark skin tumbled down the rock-covered hill with such smoothness that Steph had to applaud him for his lack of clumsiness. She only wished that she had such skill. But, once she spotted the look on his face, she began to deeply panic. She subconsciously reached out to help him just as he reached them.

"Are you all right, kid?!" she exclaimed, placing her hands on the boy's shoulders when he fell to his knees out of exhaustion. "Are you hurt?!"

"No..." the boy whispered tiredly. "Help me, please.... Kids... big kids –"

"YOU'RE DEAD!" the male voice screeched again before appearing over the graveled hill, peering at his main target. Then Henry Bowers saw the other nine kids surrounding the boy and he smirked in pride as his goons moved up to him from behind. "Well, what do you know? It's the fat boy, the jew, and the sissy. Four-eyes and the patch girl, too. And two more little shits to add to the group." Then he glanced towards Steph and Bill and scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Well, Stuttering Bill, it seems you got yourself a creepy ass girlfriend. It's the Losers Club!"

Henry's gang decided to follow this with hysterical laughter as they repeated the words he had said, making Steph also roll her eyes in annoyance.

"Look..." Henry continued, "...I got bones to pick with all of you, but I'm willing to let that go for today. Today, I want him." He gestured to the new kid that had come across the group. "So, you little shits buzz off."

"Why don't you guys get out of here?!" Bill retorted with a scowl of anger. "The B-Barrens are ours. You k-k-kids get out of huh-here."

Henry balked at Bill as if he had been backhanded across the face. "Who's gonna make me?"

"We are," Ben said confidently.

"What did you say, chubs?" Henry replied defiantly.

"You shut the fuck up, asshole!" Steph cried out, her eyebrows scrunched together out of fury.

"Yeah, why don't you dig the wax out of your ears, barf breath?!" Richie added.

"We're through t-tuh-taking your shit, Buh-Buh-Bowers. Get ow-ow-out!" Bill shouted.

"You stuttering freak," Henry muttered quietly, but Steph was able to hear it through his mind's eye.

Suddenly, Henry was shoved to the dusty ground as if being held down by invisible hands; just as he grunted out of confusion, that was when Bill had thrown his second rock, hitting Henry straight in the knee, making him cry out in pain.

"Oh... you're gonna get a surprise," Henry snarled at the group. "You're gonna get such a surprise!"

Then all of them began catapulting rocks towards the little bastard and, while some of them missed, some made their mark – either on his shoulders or his forehead. He curled into a ball on the ground as he wailed for his friends to help him, but they were already fleeing, knowing they were greatly outnumbered by ten to five. They leaped over the hill and took off towards their homes.

Meanwhile, Henry had recovered and had started gathering rocks of his own; for a moment, Steph believed that she could see a sliver of a golden color in his irises.

Justin had slightly moved Amber out of his way and also grabbed some stones, hurling them towards Bowers with a fiery desperation in his eyes. "You leave us alone!" he shrieked as loudly as he could, and Amber couldn't help but feel proud of her baby brother for finally taking that final step towards bravery. Now, he was officially becoming his own person that didn't need to go to her for protection all the time.

Right as that revelation came to fruition, Henry then threw a larger rock at Beverly, and it struck her arm. The girl cried out in shock and agony as she clutched the small cut that was oozing blood from under the sleeve of her right arm.

Bellowing, both Amber and Ben charged at Henry and tackled him to the ground at once. While Ben delivered a sharp kick to Henry's hip, Amber drove her fist into the boy's cheek, for sure creating a bruise that would remain for the rest of the summer.

"You sorry ass bastard..." she growled before tossing him back towards the ground while he clutched his face in anguish.

While the two Losers walked back to the rest of the group, Bill walked up to a cowering Henry with an expression of victory and tiredness. "Get out..." he commanded.

"And what if I won't?" Henry retaliated.

"I-If you wuh-won't," Bill began, "w-w-we're g-going to muh-move i-in on y-you. I think the nuh-nine of us could puh-put you in the hospital."

"Ten," the new kid chimed in with a proud expression of his own.

"You fucking ni –" Henry started to say but Amber swiftly cut him off.

"Call him that word, Bowers, I dare you!" she sharply yelled, also stepping forward. "Go ahead and say it, and I'll guarantee a black eye for you this time!"

"Shut up, you fucking dyke!" Henry wailed in her direction. "You and your stupid ass brother –"

Steph then snapped, seeing red.

She unknowingly raised her arms and stormed over to Henry, a sort of almost invisible mist erupting from the palms of her hands. Her pupils then became a piercing white as she bared her teeth. "DON'T FUCKING CALL HER THAT!" she roared in a voice that was unrecognizable.

Henry was dangling in midair in a matter of seconds, yelping in surprise and fear of what was going on. He then felt a grip that he couldn't see clutching at his esophagus, and he tried to reach up to pry it away; but his hands were trapped at his sides. "What the fuck?!" he choked out hoarsely.

"If you say that to Amber again, I will find you and kill you slowly, do you understand me, boy?!" the girl growled, her voice sounding much deeper than normal as she stared up at him with her glowing eyes of rage.

Meanwhile, the other nine stared at her in utter bewilderment and with wide eyes; although they thought at first that it was their clown doing this in secret, it didn't take them too long to realize that this was all Steph's doing as she threatened the bully face to face.

Henry seemed to come to this conclusion at the same time, since he glared down at Steph in utter terror. "Wuh... Witch..." he rasped out, shaking his head. "You fucking witch."

Him saying this caused the grip around his throat to tighten significantly, and he squeezed his eyes shut as he began to cough from the mad tickling sensation in his tonsils.

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not," was all Steph said. "But I'm warning you, kid... if you come near us again, it will be a death sentence for you. I'm absolutely done with your bullshit. All you've ever done to us is torture us and make us feel ashamed of ourselves when we shouldn't be." Her powerful eyes then welled with silvery tears. "You make us feel like we're nothing. AND WE'RE NOT FUCKING NOTHING!"

She then used her misty hands to fling Bowers to the ground, sending up a cloud of dust in the process. She even smiled when she saw that she had hurt him even more, her flaming eyes bright with a victorious happiness.

"You're a fucking witch!" Henry cried out now that he could speak properly again, standing up. "You're creepy bitch self is the cause of me 'torturing you,' you dumbass cunt."

"Be careful," Steph whispered almost soothingly as she formed a silvery ball in her right hand, "of what you say to me, boy..."

Henry gulped at what he was seeing as he slowly began backing away, not wanting to deal with Stephanie Palmer's supernatural wrath again. The bitch was crazier than he thought. "I'LL KILL YOU ALL!" he yelled before advancing over the hill and disappearing from sight.

Ever so slowly, Steph's white eyes dissolved back to the midnight blue they naturally were, and the mist vanished into thin air as well. Her entranced expression was replaced by one of relaxation that Henry was gone from their lives again.

"Thanks..." the new kid then said, breaking the awkward silence.

"Anytime," Stan said to him.

Steph then peered down at her hands, suddenly puzzled as to why her mind had gone blank for a brief amount of time. Her eyebrows raised as she studied the curved lines in her palms, and that was when she saw the thin sliver of what seemed to be mist still lingering on her skin. She then looked back up to where Henry had left, noting that he had been limping away from them when she fully came back to herself. It seemed as though one of his legs had been badly bruised but not sprained or broken, much to her relief.

Did... Did I hurt him?! she whimpered in her mind, her shoulders beginning to quiver. Oh God... I did something I shouldn't have. And now they know. They all know! I can't be here! Dear Lord, please help me!

She had unwillingly revealed what she really was to her friends, and now she knew she was royally fucked.

"Stuh-Steph...?" Bill murmured as he cautiously stepped up to her, placing a hand on her shaking shoulder.

Steph majorly flinched from Bill's touch, placing her hands over her heart in an attempt to further hide herself away. She stepped back from him and the rest of the group, her eyes flickering to gray multiple times as she tried her absolute hardest to keep her composure. "You weren't supposed to know..." she whispered frantically, the tears from earlier slightly spilling over. "You were never supposed to know."

"Steph, it's okay," Richie tried to assure her, his surprised expression from earlier transforming to one of comfort.

"Don't come near me!" she shouted, and he paused in his movement. "Please... just... don't... I don't belong here."

And then, fully crying now, she spun around and took off towards the woods, still clutching her hands to her heart to avoid losing control.

"Steph, come back!" all of the others shouted after her, but she just ignored them.

_____

Fifteen Minutes Later

She sat on a mossy tree stump as she stared at the beautiful stream that was flowing towards the Kenduskeag River not too far from where she was. The tears that had been shed had since dried away as she fiddled with the hem of her dress, sighing softly to herself as she hummed in her mind. While she was still horribly frightened over what she had done, she found some sense of comfort in staring at the stream in the Barrens.

How could she have fucked up so badly?! Her mother had kept on warning her and warning her and she now felt that she had failed her.

"Steph, you can't risk letting people know," Jamie had said. "They might be afraid of you," she said. "Do you want a repeat of the Salem witch trials?!" she said.

She said, she said, she said, she said, she fucking said, Steph thought sarcastically. Well, congratulations, Mother. You were right. They're probably going to report me to the police right now and I'll be hanged just like in the sixteen hundreds. What a nice conclusion to my cursed life that'll be.

But she then remembered something that her father – who had telepathy just like her and called it something like 'Shining' – had told her a month ago. "Your mother is scared of losing you," he had said. "That's why she doesn't want you to show people what you can do. She doesn't want you to be hanged off of a lamppost somewhere. But I don't think that could happen... not if you can use your power to overpower the ones who would wish to harm you. You're stronger than them. I don't want you to suppress yourself; learn to rid your soul of that fear and you'll be able to control your powers much better. Don't hide yourself away, especially from your friends."

Too late for that, Dad. They hate me, I'm sure of it. Just as I feared. They're never gonna want to hang out with me again.

Steph then grasped a small, flat rock in her slim fingers and launched it across the stream. She examined the rock bouncing up and down as it skipped along the water around three times before finally sinking into the shallow abyss. She then lowered her eyes towards the long grass that extended past her covered ankles and picked a few strands of it from the soil, toying with them as if they were toys.

She knew that, sooner or later this summer, her family would be forced to pack their things and take off to somewhere such as maybe Chicago or St. Louis. She had exposed herself to the last people she wanted to know about her abilities. They had a good run but it would be over; the twelve years in Derry, Maine would finish and they would be gone in a matter of weeks, maybe even days.

At least she wouldn't have to deal with the clown anymore. It wouldn't be her problem.

"Steph?"

The blonde jumped at the sudden voice and she lifted her head upward, tilting it in bewilderment.

Bill had stepped through a crowd of trees and spotted her sitting on the stump, sighing with relief that she wasn't hurt and that he had found her. But when she looked away out of pure shame and humiliation, Bill's face fell and he frowned as he stepped over to her and sat on the ground in front of her.

"Why did you follow me here...?" the girl asked in an almost broken tone of voice.

"I wuh-was worried a-a-about you..." Bill simply said as he tried to meet her gaze, but she refused to look in his direction.

"What are you worried about with me?" Steph retorted as she barely glanced at him. "The fact that I have powers or that I nearly murdered Henry Bowers...? Which one?"

"Neither," was all Bill could say. "I was worried that you weren't okay... up huh-here." He then pointed at his temple to gesture to her.

Steph only nodded slightly, closing her eyes as she sighed. "God..." she whispered. "Bill... how could you still care after seeing that...? I almost killed Henry Bowers and you still care for me, somehow...?"

"Yes," he replied. "Yuh-You're still m-m-m-my friend, how could I not c-care?"

"So it doesn't creep you the fuck out that I can move things and people with my mind and that I can do so in a heartbeat?!" she demanded of him. "Or that I can read minds, or that I can manipulate minds maybe?! That doesn't scare you at all? Seriously? You must have a huge amount of guts to say that to me... Why don't you just go on back to the others, Bill?"

Bill's lips parted as he leaned closer to her to try and convince her further, his own eyes filling with tears. "No, i-i-it doesn't," he answered confidently. "It doesn't scuh-scare me, really."

Steph then covered her face with her hands as tearless sobs escaped her. "I've heard my father say that and I didn't believe him either!" she wailed, scared to look at Bill. "Please... just... don't say that to make me feel better."

"I'm not," Bill pleaded, no stutter. "You say you can read minds? Then read mine. You'll see nothing but the truth."

Steph stared at him through her fingers in disbelief; was this boy that she cared too much for asking her to read his mind? But she could already do that unwillingly, couldn't she? But, most of the time, she wouldn't remember what she had seen. But... maybe... if willingly done...

"If... If that's alright with you..." she murmured with a curious expression.

Bill nodded.

And so Steph carefully lifted her hand and placed two of her fingers on Bill's temple, being gentle so as to not hurt him. She then shut her eyes again and did her best to focus, breathing deeply and evenly as the sobs ceased to exist; she was able to feel what seemed to be invisible strings slipping from the tips of said fingers, and it made her hand quiver as a shuddering breath escaped her.

She could then see the other nine kids back at the gravel pit as she had taken off towards the Barrens, all pondering on what to do next.

"She's afraid," Beverly had muttered, sighing sadly to herself.

"I don't know why," Richie had said in reply. "Bowers deserved it, the fucker had it coming. Besides... I thought it was cool what she did."

"She thinks we're scared of her," Stan guessed, shrugging his shoulders absentmindedly.

"There's no reason for her to be," Eddie had spoken up. "I'd rather deal with her than the clown. She's not scary."

"Yeah, what she did was pretty cool," said Amber.

"I'll guh-go talk to h-h-her," Bill had told them. "I'll try to cuh-con-convince her that she's still okay wih-with us."

Steph's eyes opened back up as the strings disappeared, and she pulled her fingers away from Bill's temple, feeling absolutely stupid now. "Oh..." she murmured.

"O-Oh..." Bill jokingly replied, getting Steph to laugh and feel better about the situation.

"I just... didn't think you guys would be okay with it..." Steph said. "I thought y'all would be scared shitless, you know?"

"Well, we-we weren't," Bill assured her, reaching out to try and take her hand into his. When she slightly flinched away, he waited patiently, his blue eyes entirely earnest as he nodded his head to silently tell her that it was okay. When she then slowly slipped her hand into his, he felt relief that she was finally opening up about what had been bothering her. "Yuh-You don't frighten u-u-us, Steph," he added. "You're a m-m-muh-million times better than our monster. Tr-Trust me. We still love you, alright?"

Steph nodded slowly as a small smile formed on her face, and it finally reached her eyes. Then her eyes seemed to brighten. "Um... do you want to see me move something else...?" she shyly asked.

"Sh-Sure," Bill said excitedly, grinning in an encouraging way.

Steph then wiped the smile from her face in order to direct her attention to anything she could find that was nearby. She decided to center on a cherry-colored carnation flower that had fully blossomed thanks to the summer weather, and she grasped the edge of the stump she sat on and slightly squinted her eyes. She breathed in through the nose and out through her mouth so she could stay relaxed; her shoulders didn't tense and her heartbeat stayed calm the entire time.

While it didn't move for several seconds, she decided to bring a thought to the deep library of her subliminal mind. She thought of how she and the others had victoriously won the rock fight against the Bowers Gang and how Bill was now encouraging her to present her real self to him.

A tiny smile touched her lips then.

And then, the carnation plucked itself from the soil with a soft popping sound. It lifted into the air with a wiggling progress.

She blinked and then the flower was advancing towards Bill with satisfying smoothness despite the object trembling in her mental grip.

Her pulse throbbed in her temples and her wrists as she kept the tightest hold on the flower as she could so it wouldn't fall. But a quiet laugh came out of her as she became impressed with herself. Maybe it was possible to control this power, maybe it was possible to use it for good intentions. And that glimmer of hope was enough to make her smile ecstatically.

The flower then landed in Bill's outstretched hand and Steph finally let go, slightly exhausted.

"Well... there you go," she said sheepishly.

While Bill's eyes were wide with wonder, he focused on Steph being in front of him instead. He twirled the flower in his hand for a few seconds before moving forward and placing the stem of it behind her left ear, admiring how the beauty of the petals matched her. "Muh-Much better," he said.

Steph felt a warm rush of blood rise to her cheeks as she timidly dropped her gaze, giggling softly. She didn't know that her giggle was enough to send Bill's heart into somersaults.

"Yuh-You don't frighten m-m-me, Steph," Bill told her with a gentle smile, scooting closer to her. "Ruh-Really, you don't. No offense, but you're th-th-thuh-the least intimid-d-ating person I've eh-ever met."

"None taken," Steph replied with a smirk. "But thank you... really.... I really appreciate that."

"Of course. But I duh-do have a question."

"Hmm...?"

"Wuh-Wuh-Why did you try to stay away f-fr-from us? Ih-Initially...?"

Steph just sighed. "Because I was afraid that I would bring harm to you guys..." she said truthfully, gnawing at her bottom lip. "And I didn't want to do that. I can't hurt any of you... Justin or Amber... the others... my parents... but especially you. You're one of the very last people I want to hurt... I don't want to ever do that to you. You've already been through enough."

"You won't," Bill said. "I pr-promise you... you could neh-never hurt me. You didn't just now. I know you won't. Yuh-You're too sweet to hurt a-a-anyone."

A single tear slipped down Steph's left cheek upon hearing this, but it wasn't of sadness or fear; it was of gratefulness as her lips quivered. "Thank you..." she whispered. "But what if I do...? What if I hurt you...?"

"It wuh-wuh-won't be on purpose," said Bill. "You wouldn't m-mean to, I swear. I would understand."

When he saw that Steph's walls were breaking around her, he moved to sit next to her so he could pull her into a consoling hug. The girl shook in his arms as she held onto him desperately, not wanting him to disappear into thin air; she prayed that this wasn't a dream and that she was in reality, especially when she felt him pressing small kisses into her hair, which made her blush furiously through the tears.

After a while of them holding each other, Bill slowly pulled back and looked at her, his face also red with sheepishness. "I may as-as well tell you..." he muttered, swearing to himself. "You might a-a-al-already know but... I... I luh... I like you, Steph...."

The shy blush seemed to dissipate slightly from Steph's face as she reached up to delicately place her right hand on the left side of Bill's face. Her gaze wasn't nervous or reluctant, but firm. It was as if she had mentally aged considerably but in a good way. "I didn't need to read your mind to know that already, Bill. You were very obvious," was her response as she smiled sweetly at him. "But that's not a bad thing. It means you were genuine about it. And I like you, too."

Bill sighed with relief as he leaned into her touch. "I knew that, too," he said with a chuckle. "Buh-But I'm glad."

"Me too..."

Bill then glanced at the ground for a moment before peering back up at Steph. "Um... do you w-w-want to be my g-guh-girl-girlfriend?" he asked timidly.

Steph grinned enthusiastically upon hearing this, shrugging her shoulders. "Why the hell not?" she said. "I've already shown you what I really am... What more do I have to lose? That basically means yes."

The two of them laughed at this for a few seconds before gazing at each other for a long moment. Bill, in the meantime, just took his time admiring his girlfriend's features, searching desperately for a flaw about her physical appearance. There didn't seem to be one, however.

"You're veh-very pretty, you know?" he whispered. "Beautiful, even."

Steph smiled jokingly. "We haven't been together for a minute and you're already flirting," she pointed out, giggling when she saw Bill's face become blood red. "But thank you... really... even if I disagree."

"No nuh-need to disagree, Steph," Bill murmured before leaning in and respectfully pecking Steph's cheek, not wanting to properly kiss her until the both of them were ready.

Steph's face was flushed after he did this but she made no effort to comment on what he had said.

After a little while of comforting her, Bill offered his hand to the girl and she happily took it, feeling much more cheerful than she had a good while ago; several weeks ago, in fact. While she was hesitant to even touch him, she found that he felt completely safe with her and wasn't afraid of her in the slightest. The at ease expression in his earnest eyes was enough to tell her that and it made her shoulders slump with pure comfort, resting her head on his shoulder as they walked.

While she was afraid she would never get the opportunity to experience young love, Bill made sure she was granted that wish. And she felt that she had made the right choice in agreeing to it despite her fears still being relevant.

She just knew that she would have to keep this a secret from her mother for just a little, at least until she was ready to admit it to her. Jamie was the only one of the three Palmers that had no semblance of supernatural abilities and so she wasn't let in on the secrets her husband and daughter shared through their minds as often. Steph's powers had come entirely from her father, the Shining in particular... the telekinesis, however, she had no clue where that had manifested from.

Or so she thought...

The two of them eventually stepped out from the woods and spotted the other eight kids still hanging out around the gravel pit and conversing. Steph noticed that the newest boy had remained there, opting to not leave them as she thought he would have and that made her grateful. Her subconscious seemed to reassure her that it might have meant to be that way. Maybe this boy was the final piece of the jigsaw puzzle that fit all of them together as a group.

The eight remaining children seemed to turn towards the couple at once, almost as if they were expecting them. They then saw Bill's hand clasping Steph's and exchanged knowing smiles; unlike usual, though, Richie chose not to say anything vulgar and instead just nodded proudly.

"Who are you guys, anyway?" the newest kid then asked after Steph sat down next to Bill.

"We're sort of a club," Eddie answered with squinted eyes, choosing to try and ignore the sun's rays practically blinding him.

"Yeah, the Losers Club," Bev added onto that, making the others chuckle.

"You're welcome to join us if you like," Amber offered with a kind smile.

"Yeah, you wuh-want in?" Bill pondered as he slipped an arm around Steph's waist, not ignoring her blush.

"Yeah," the boy said with a smile. "Yeah, I do."

"Hey, we're ten now!" Ben announced proudly. "Lucky ten!"

"I'm Mike, Mike Hanlon," the kid then told all of them before they could ask.

"I'm Stephanie Palmer," Steph introduced herself. "Sorry for startling you if I did."

"It's no problem," Mike said with a polite smile. "Nice to meet you."

_____

Young Amber

She walks towards the chain-link fence, the blades of the bright green grass prickling her bare feet but she doesn't acknowledge it. She's more so stumbling as if lost in a crowd she cannot see and her light blue pajamas are covered from head to toe in coal black grime and filth; but she can't smell it. The only smells that hit her is one of freshly mowed grass and of grease... the kind of grease from fried food from the circuses in Maine.

She peers through the gaps of the fence as she delicately grabs a hold of it, examining the dozens of children on carnival rides; she sees families about, mother and father, daughter and son, even twin kids at one point. There is a Ferris wheel, a tiny roller coaster, and a merry-go-round spinning ever so slowly.

A nostalgic smile touches her lips as she looks from one family to the next, only to realize something puzzling. They don't look a thing like the families she should recognize from her time. Their clothes are more futuristic, like they're thirty years older than she currently is and the children she hung out with now are around the age of forty and not ten or eleven. Her eyes narrow out of complete confusion as she sees this, and she tilts her head in order to try and figure out what's going on.

She then glances at one of the tents and spots a group of clowns conversing with young children, who giggle at the magic tricks that they perform with balloons shaped into animals or even with a deck of cards. For whatever reason, her heartbeat begins to pick up speed upon seeing this and she grasps the fence a little more tightly.

One of the clowns, as if by a sixth sense, turns to glance at her with what seem to be silver dollar eyes adorning its white grease painted face. The orange tufts of hair on either side of its head are enough to be a dead giveaway as to who this is, and her own eyes widen so much that they nearly pop out of their sockets.

"No..." she whispers to herself. "No!"

But her voice is not heard by those in front of her. Not a decibel is able to escape her lips, rendering her words silent.

She then slams her hands against the chain-link fence, hearing the metal rattle and echo in the distance as she desperately tries to get their attention.

But it doesn't work.

The clown grins sinisterly at her as it seems to move impossibly closer.

"NO!" she silently shrieks. "NO! DON'T HURT THEM! RUN! EVERYONE PLEASE RUN PLEASE –"

Then a fountain of blood erupts from each person in the carnival, splattering onto her as she is forced to watch and hear their agonized screams.

_____

Adult Amber

Amber jolted upward in the driver's seat where she was parked, her heart in her throat as she gasped for air. Nobody was in the truck with her, as the other Losers had since gone inside the townhouse and she had told them she would follow soon enough.

A dream, she thought to herself. Just a stupid fucking dream.

Or had it been? Yes, yes, it had been.

Right?

A/N: that chapter was crazy, wasn't it?

ANYWAYS, thoughts on this chapter? did you enjoy it? let me know!

do you think this book is going too quickly? let me know...

thoughts on steph's mental state as a kid before the rock right? was it done well?

what about the actual rock fight? i brought in some dialogue from the original novel as well!

what about when justin started coming out of his shell?

did you like the scene where steph attacked henry with her powers as if she were wanda?!

what about when bill comforted her after she became frightened of herself again? did you like the scene with the flower?

thoughts on the confession scene? was it done well? was it adorable?

what about amber's nightmare at the very end? it was inspired by terminator 2: judgement day!

predictions for the next chapter?

be looking forward to the next chapter!

-denbroughswife