❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

"Joshua? Can you hear me?!" Seokmin's screams fell unto deaf ears since he wasn't actually screaming. He still couldn't speak.

When he'd woken up to himself in a vegetative state 3 weeks ago, sadness enveloped him in a cold bone-chilling hug. He had his body but he couldn't use it. He couldn't speak to Joshua, he couldn't touch Joshua, he couldn't hug Joshua and tell him he was okay, that everything was going to be okay.

Frustration descended on him like a dark cloud, wrapping him up in anguish. He felt so useless, helpless, tired and exhausted. He wanted to do something, he wanted to break out of the strong hold this coma had in him but he couldn't.

Depression washed over him in violent waves. So many days where he'd wanted to do something, say something and he couldn't. He was trapped in his body with only one way out.

Death.

But he didn't want to die, not like this, not right now so all he could do was wait. Wait until his body decided to accept him again. Decided to take him back and return him to Joshua.

"Wonwoo brought pizza, he said it's your favourite. I can't believe I didn't know your favourite food." Joshua chuckled, putting the pizza near Seokmin's mouth even though he knew he couldn't eat it.

"Henley said he's going to come soon, he's fixing things up at the company. He was the one who told me about what they had done to you, I haven't told you before."

Seokmin blinked, his eyes welling up. How fucked up was it? He could cry but he couldn't explain why he was crying. Henley had saved him? He would forever be grateful to him.

"I'm sorry, this is all my fault." Joshua placed the pizza back on the plate covering his face as he teared up. Seokmin wanted to do something but his fingers and toes were the only part of his body that could move.

"It's not your fault my love." He consoled Joshua regardless of Joshua not being able to hear him. Please don't say it's your fault.

It's all mine.

Joshua wiped his tears away before noticing that Seokmin was also crying. He grabbed a tissue and patted his tears away. The touch was gentle and sweet as the feeling of water on his face disappeared.

Seokmin watched as Joshua held himself back from crying as he wiped his tears away. He felt a pang of guilt and sorrow surge through his heart and he closed his eyes, beginning to pray.

Please God, please let me recover from this, please let me go back to my love.

.............

Joshua threw the tissue paper away before intertwining his hands with Seokmin's whose fingers wrapped around his. It was a subtle sign, a sign that he was going to be okay.

It had been 3 weeks since he got into the coma but he was going to be okay. He had made great progress so far. Opening his eyes, wiggling his fingers and toes and staying awake for a longer period of time each day.

Joshua was proud of him. He was truly trying his best to come back, to recover fast. He had spent the past weeks in the hospital, refusing to leave but occasionally being forced to go home and take a shower by Vernon, Seungkwan and Seokmin's brother Wonwoo.

Who he found to be quite the character. Snarky but also very nice. Wonwoo hated him at first but after the first week, he started to accept Joshua.

That was good. He wouldn't want to have a brother-in-law that hated his guts.

Joshua rubbed his hand along Seokmin's palm, tracing random patterns and designs. He believed in Seokmin, he trusted him. He knew that Seokmin would he able to come out of this. He was strong.

He was Joshua's heart, after all and last time he'd checked, his heart was beating and functioning fully so Seokmin would too.

Joshua was sure of that.

Even though every second dragged on so much it started to feel like a year, even on the days where Seokmin made no progress, even when the guilt suffocated him, Joshua remained by his side, providing as much support as he could.

"I'm sorry that I kicked you out that day. I'm sorry that I didn't give you a chance to explain. I'm sorry that I told you to leave, I'm sorry that I cut you off, I'm sorry that I didn't reach out to you." Joshua began to apologize, hoping Seokmin could hear him but it was fine even if he couldn't. He didn't mind saying it over and over until he did.

"I'm sorry that because of me, you've been in danger so many times, I'm sorry that because of me, you're now in a coma. I'm sorry Mon Coeur, I really am." He squeezed Seokmin's arm, his eyes watery and his throat dry as he spoke.

"I know you're angry at me so please come back, okay? Come back and yell at me as much as you want, come back and hit me and tease me and kiss me and hold me, Mon Coeur. Please, please just come back." He begged as he rested his head on Seokmin's stomach, looking up at his angelic face that had been succumbed to such a painful experience. He had been frozen by force.

"If I'm not enough, that's okay, please come back for your brother, come back for Henley, come back, don't let your father's wishes come to pass, please, I'm begging you Seokmin, come back."

He knew he was being impatient but he too was trying his best. Three weeks had felt like three thousand years as he waited in the hospital for Seokmin to become responsive again. All he wanted was for the love of his life to come back to him.

He wasn't asking for money or fame. His wish wasn't frivolous. It was just one thing. He wanted Seokmin back. His heart, the love of his life.

His Seokmin.

.............

No, don't apologize to me, Josh. I was the one who fucked up.

Seokmin tried to stop Joshua from feeling any guilt he shouldn't have been feeling but he couldn't physically do that. He could only stare and hope that they would be telepathically connected.

He wanted to come back too. He wanted to hug Joshua until they had to be pryed away from each other. He wanted to see everyone again, touch them and hug them. He wanted to walk around, he really wanted to, he didn't know why his body was being so stubborn.

He'd heard his doctors say that if his coma passed a month, he would most likely never be able to get out of it a few weeks ago and those words were his encouragement to try his hardest to get out. To go back to the land of the living.

To not meet his father anytime soon.

He hated to see Joshua in so much pain, so much suffering because of him. Joshua's pain was his pain and when Joshua cried he cried. They were connected in multiple ways and Seokmin couldn't stand the fact that he was the reason Joshua cried every day.

He already hated himself and knowing all this only made him loathe his entire being even more.

The best thing he could do was to wake up, get up and return to everyone who was patiently waiting for him even when others would have given up on him a long time ago.

He had to go back to his Joshua. He refused to leave him on Earth alone. He refused to leave his side.

Seokmin observed as Joshua raised his head up from his stomach and got up, about to leave the room. No! Where was he going?

Seokmin stretched out his hand in a moment of desperation and then froze in shock as he felt a little pain but not one strong enough to push his hand back down.

Was he moving?

He opened his mouth to speak, a distressed sound escaping his vocal chords as he mumbled, "Joshua."

Had he really just spoken?

Joshua turned instantly as the words sailed through his ears.

Joshua heard him?

He rushed towards Seokmin, holding his hands and leaning closer. "Did you just call me?" He asked, his hands and his breath shakey.

Seokmin moved his head up and down slowly, forming a nod. "Don't... go..." He forced the words out of his mouth, surprising even himself.

A joyful smile spread across Joshua's face as he plastered himself unto Joshua in a tight hug. "I'm not going anywhere, Mon Coeur." He said softly, the melody pleasing Seokmin's ears and making him smile too.

As Dr. Kwon barged into the room, Joshua turned to him, the smile still stuck to his face.

"He's talking Dr. Kwon! He's talking!"

Seokmin had done it. He had recovered. He had overcome the darkness, the fear, the sorrow and the pain he had been subjected to.

He had come back.

For Joshua.

❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎❤︎

Ⓒ︎𝐎𝐇𝐖𝐀𝐘𝐎𝐇𝐖𝐀𝐘𝐎𝐇
𝐒𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 - 06/10/2024
𝐄𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 - 05/11/2024