Leilani (lay-la-knee)

...

17 September 1979

James had always been told he had had a comforting presence. Perhaps he had inherited this from Euphemia, so when Lily got back to Godric's Hollow, he took it as his duty to make sure she was okay.

James didn't expect to be called in to work for the Order either. Thankfully, this proved to be correct when James and Lily were both allowed to stay home a second day.

"How're you feeling?" James asked as they cuddled onto the couch with each other.

Lily had gotten out of Henry's attack mostly unscathed minus some minor scratches on her arms and legs. She had had a bad headache yesterday, but it seemed to have disappeared overnight.

Yet, it wasn't physical health he was worried about. Lily had been so excited to meet up with Petunia, he could only imagine the amount of disappointment she had felt when it was Henry and not Petunia. She had been given false hope. James also knew that Lily would blame it on herself. Why had she responded to the letter? Personally, he didn't blame her because he probably would've wanted to make amends as well.

"Like shit quite honestly," Lily bluntly spoke in a raspy voice.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" He said gently.

"What's wrong with me that Petunia doesn't want to associate with each other?"

"Nothing's wrong with you-"

"See, you say that, but then why wouldn't she want to at least speak to me if nothings wrong with me. What the hell did I do?" Lily spoke in a harsh tone directed at no one in particular.

"Love, people fall out everyday. Petunia missed out on a wonderful person and, at the end of the day, you can't blame it on yourself," James said and hugged her closer to his chest.

"I-I know, it's just hard to think we used to be so close and now..."

Lily broke down the walls she had been desperately trying to build and let her last resolve go. It was no use around James anyway, he managed to break down every barrier she had put up previously.

"I'm so sorry," James said apologetically.

"I am too," Lily cried into his shoulder.

The most difficult thing was that she couldn't even reach out to Petunia as she had no idea where she was living. There was no way that Petunia could've known where Lily was living either. She felt stupid thinking Petunia even wanted to speak with her.

...

21 September 1979

Remus had been following the same pack of werewolves for what felt like years but had really only been a full week. They had a clear leader—who looked the most rugged out of them all. Though, she had clear beauty too.

Her dirty blond hair, although greasy and knotty, reached her shoulder blades. There were scars littering every inch of her body, much like Remus's, and he could tell they had been acquired over time. She held an air of dominance while being several inches shorter than everyone else. (She looked around a few inches taller than Lily.)

If he couldn't tell by looking at her, Remus would've already known she was a werewolf because of the pictures Dumbledore had given him. Doodles had somehow gotten ahold of pictures with the girl —currently nameless it appears— speaking to Greyback.

Around five members of the pack, including her, walked into the pub. Although it was a risky decision, Remus waited a few minutes before cautiously entering the pub. In order to do so, he had to walk past the rest of the pack that waited outside.

Seeing the way other werewolves lived made him sad. That's how he could've been if he hadn't been accepted to Hogwarts by Dumbledore. It was times like these that Remus thought he had taken his education for granted.

He entered the pub and sat a few barstools down from the five werewolves who now sipped idly on some water. The bartender didn't take his order, but instead placed a beer in front of Remus and left the area.

The leader of the pack seemed to have taken an interest in Remus. She turned to face him so that her back was to her friends.

"Why have you been following us?" Her voice sounded as ragged as her clothes looked.

"I have been doing no such thing," Remus smiled smugly when she narrowed her eyes.

He was definitely terrified of where this conversation was heading, as he had no idea how she had figured out he had been following them already, but he was not going to show that fear in any way. In order to calm himself down, he took a swig of his beer as the woman sat and watched him. Remus gagged on the flavor of the beer. That must've been at least a few years old.

"Well then, what's this?" She asked with a picture of her standing next to Greyback in her hand.

If Remus had been drinking his beer at that moment, then he would've choked on it and not because of the flavor.

"That appears to be you," Remus answered with the most nonchalant tone he could muster.

"So, if you're not following us, then why do you have a picture of me in your pocket? Unless you're a fan of my work," she gave him a bone-chilling smile.

"On the contrary, I have no idea who you are! So, this must be a coincidence," Remus replied almost sarcastically.

She rolled her eyes at his answer. Her friends got up from behind her and left with the cash register in their hands. They didn't stop to speak to her but gave her a few scared glances.

"Listen here," she raised her eyebrows as if daring him to challenge her, "if you harm one-"

"I mean absolutely no harm to any of you," Remus clarified and held up his hands in surrender.

Technically, he wasn't lying. Remus was not on the mission to hurt any of the werewolves, he was just there to collect information. He wasn't too sure what Dumbledore was going to do with the information, but Remus was trying to believe that Dumbledore would never cause harm to anyone on purpose.

"Do you have one?" She asked suddenly.

"I'm not sure what you're referencing," Remus responded now confused.

She sighed and pulled her shirt to the side to reveal a bite scar on her left shoulder. Remus tried not to look at his too often and revealing his to a stranger in a random pub seemed a bit mortifying, but he followed her action and showed her his bite scar.

"I'm Leilani, the leader of this pack, as you may already know," She finally introduced herself. "Do you have a name?"

"No, I'm nameless," Remus spoke sarcastically.

"It's not unbelievable. Some of us were bitten so young and abandoned by our families, so we don't know what our names are," Leilani adopted a somber tone.

Although her tone was somber, her eyes held a certain hatred that Remus had only seen on a few faces. She had passion —he was sure of that— but what was it for? Was it for all the right or for all the wrong reasons?

"I'm Remus."

She stood up from her barstool abruptly, nearly knocking it over as she took a few steps forward. He continued to sit, unsure if he was to follow or not.

"So, Remus, are you coming with me or not?" She asked expectantly.

In a second, he was up and walking side by side with Leilani. He couldn't be sure of how dangerous she was yet —he was taught never to underestimate women of any size— but he was petrified of meeting the rest of the pack.

He was anticipating Leilani introducing him to the pack, but she strode by the rest of them, who were now fighting over the money in the cash register. There were about twenty of them and each one of them was silenced as they walked past. It's probably an educated guess to think that the way she had acquired this power over them was nothing good, and it was probably in Remus's best interest to stay in her good books.

"I didn't know there were this many of us," Remus spoke idly, just attempting to make conversation. 

"Just wait until you see the rest of us," she responded without looking at him.

"Rest of us?" Remus questioned.

"You didn't think this pack was the only werewolf pack out there, did you?" She fired back.

They walked down the dirt road in the opposite direction than how they arrived. Eventually, this led them into the woods and they set up camp as night fell. Those skilled enough conjured tents or transfigured them from nearby objects, while others slept on the forest ground.

Remus was fortunate enough to have brought a tent with him in his bag that was magically expanded to fit anything he needed. After setting that up away from everyone else, yet still close enough to where he would hear if anyone had exited their tents, he pulled out his journal and began to write after lighting his wand.

Day 1: 21/9/79

I have finally gotten into the pack. The leader's name is Leilani. (She has not indicated a last name yet.) We camp in an unknown forest. I have asked multiple people here where we are and it seems none of them know. I fear that asking Leilani directly would draw too much suspicion. I am aware she is already watching me closely.

As if writing her name could summon her, Leilani entered Remus's tent with tired eyes. They stared at each other for a moment as Remus shined the light in her eyes.

"Bloody 'ell, that light is bright," she shielded her eyes quickly.

"Is there no privacy here either?" Remus asked

"What're you doing that you're concerned about others interrupting you? " Leilani countered with a smirk.

"None of your business," Remus replied sharply, closing the journal.

"Fine be like that, but we're leaving tomorrow morning at six sharp, so be ready," Leilani said, impressed he had managed to steal a wand. Remus just didn't seem like the thief type.

She left his tent without another word, wondering if letting Remus into the pack, for now, was the right decision.

...

Still 21 September 1979

Sirius had visited the Potters with Marlene, just to see how they were doing and to give the Potters an update on how their lives were going. Mia and Flea had dropped their in-field duties for the Ministry and the Order a while ago, but being the active people they are, they continued to work desk jobs and figure out strategies.

However, they couldn't stay with the Potters forever, so Marlene traveled home while Sirius went to Hogwarts for the Order.

Marlene had seen some peculiar things over the years, being friends with 3/4 of the marauders and a girlfriend of the last one. Yet, when she entered her flat and saw Mary playing chess against herself, she still got surprised.

"What're you doing?" Marlene asked, placing her bag on the floor.

"Trying to see things from a new perspective," Mary chewed her lip while studying the chess board.

Marlene watched as her friend stared at the chess pieces for an absurd amount of time. She reckoned that she had never seen Mary play chess either.

"Since when have you been this pathetic?" Marlene questioned only half sarcastically.

Mary looked up to glare at Marlene, who had now sat across from her on the other side of the chess board.

"I've always been this way, just now have I chosen to let it show," Mary fired back.

Marlene had to bite back her own fiery response and remember that Mary was going through a breakup.

When she first heard what had happened, Marlene had wanted to strangle Remus, but Mary had said that he was nice about it and that she was okay. As the days drew on though, it was evident that Mary was not okay and that the war was having a more negative effect on her than usual.

"Remus wouldn't want you to sulk," Marlene spoke gently.

This caught Mary's attention. She could tell her friends were trying not to speak about the marauders around her because of what happened with Remus, so Marlene saying Remus's name was slightly shocking to her. Alice probably told her and Lily to coddle Mary, although Marlene was known for her ability to be blunt, so Alice's strategy would not work for her.

"I don't care what he would want," Mary said quite bluntly.

"What if you did something outside of the Order to get you out of the house?" Marlene suggested.

"Like what?"

"Like a job or something?"

"Hmmm..."

...

22 September 1979

Remus was having a moral dilemma. Since the werewolves hadn't gotten an education as he had, they weren't trusted with wands like he was. Some of them had stolen wands from other wizards, but they weren't very skilled in means of magic. So, they couldn't cast protection charms around wherever they set up their camp. The pack just relied on some of the bigger people to take care of whoever was intruding upon their space.

He was so guilty that Dumbledore had given him an education while every other werewolf was left to struggle in the wizarding world. Remus wondered whether the rest of the pack would have found friends like his at Hogwarts who made life worth living.

Should he help them?

All of them were currently walking in a pack towards wherever Greyback was. They were spread around about twenty feet in the woods with Leilani leading. Remus was the only one brave enough to get within five feet of her because as he walked right next to her, there seemed to be a five to a ten-foot radius around them on every side.

"Why are they all afraid of you?" Remus asked plainly.

There was a quick moment of silence, in which Remus thought he crossed some invisible boundary that they had somehow already set up.

"I'm Greyback's right-hand man —er— I guess right-hand woman. They reckon if they step out of line I'll tell Greyback," Leilani answered without making any eye contact. "So, instead of speaking to me, they cower."

"And you're saying you won't do that then?" He asked.

"I ain't no snitch, Remus," Leilani said, this time looking straight into his eyes.

Her eyes were a cold green color. They reflected the indifference that she had developed towards Remus as he kept pretty good company, but she had never been fond of people in general. He shivered as if they had pierced straight into his soul.

Day 2: 22/9/79

Today I found out that Leilani is one of Greyback's most trusted werewolves ever. Everyone in the pack is extremely scared of her for this reason. We're traveling to meet up with Greyback. I reckon there's going to be a huge congregation of werewolves where we're headed.

...

25 September 1979

Day 5: 25/9/79

We are still traveling on foot. I haven't learned anymore vital information. Everyone seems to keep to themselves or to a few others.

"You're a good writer for a werewolf," Leilani returned to the fire with more wood.

They were currently the only two awake with the stars, it seemed everyone else collapsed with the sun.

"You can't even see the words," Remus reminded her.

Leilani rolled her eyes at him.

"I just mean that you seem to have a proper education, so why join us now?" Leilani asked.

"Why not?" He reflected the question.

"You have a fair amount of wit too," she pointed out.

"I'm not the only one around here with that," Remus responded, closing his journal.

A topic the two bounced around was their bite stories. They both knew that Greyback bit both of them because he had bit them both in his signature spot, the left shoulder.

"Y'know the only reason I'm 'Greyback's right-hand woman' is because he took me in after I was bitten," Leilani said, finally crossing that invisible boundary.

"You mean, Greyback took you in after he bit you," Remus spoke making direct eye contact.

"I reckon you hate the bloke."

"Damn right I do, there's no reason for me to like him. There's really no reason for you to like him either!" Remus challenged her.

"My parents would've put me down like a dog, Remus! Then, they would've held a funeral saying how good of a little girl I was! They're just as sick as he is!" She shot right back, whispering angrily.

"You were little then, when it happened?" He changed the topic from her parents for a moment.

"Yeah, I was seven."

"How do you know they would've done that?" Remus asked quietly.

"It's a hunch, but they always preached blood purity and how mudbloods are dirt an' all that," Leilani sighed and kicked a rock into the fireplace.

Remus flinched at how casually she said that word. He hadn't had a sit down conversation with anyone that had used that word so casually before.

"Do you believe what Voldy says then?" He questioned, hoping she would say no.

"You're awfully bold to go around saying his name like that," Leilani responded, getting up from the ground to throw a new piece of wood into the fire.

"Do you believe in blood purity and all that?" Remus changed the question.

"No, but without Greyback what do I have?" Leilani replied.

"I can't tell you that, but for now could you maybe not say that word," Remus spoke quietly now.

"Sure thing, it's bad habit anyway," Leilani smiled shortly, understanding which word he meant immediately.

...

The Sun Doesn't Always Shine
Poem #2: Regrets and Guilt

I thought everything was fine,
but, oh, things were just failing slowly.
And all I want to do is whine,
yet I should've been there while he was mine.
Regrets and guilt run deep,
so now I feel lonely.

...

29 September 1979

Remus had a track record of breaking rules during his time at Hogwarts with his friends, but he was not willing to break the rules Dumbledore had put in place for him during this mission. So, when it was time to leave their current campsite, he prepared to apparate away.

Leilani had only side-along apparated before as she couldn't apparate herself, but she recognized what Remus was doing right away.

"Where are you going?" Leilani asked, grabbing him by his wrist.

He allowed her to drag him away from the pack only because he still had his bag on his shoulder. If he really needed to, he could just apparate with her holding onto his wrist.

"Why does it matter?" Remus spoke, faking an annoyed tone.

"The full moon is tomorrow! You can't leave the pack now!" Leilani reminded him.

She didn't really need to reiterate this fact to him because he had been keeping track of when the full moons were since he was five —two years before she had been doing the same thing— but she did anyway.

"I'll see you later, Lani," Remus sighed, too tired to argue with her.

"I'm gonna figure you out, Remus," she backed up a few steps.

"I'd like to see you try," Remus said.

Before leaving, he left her with a wink that would visit her in her dreams.

...

Not even in seconds, he landed onto familiar wood flooring. He was home.

"Moony! I'm so happy-"

"I'm off to take a shower."

Remus knew it was probably rude, but he hadn't been keeping up with his hygiene while camping. All he had was a stick of deodorant.

"Alrighty then," Sirius said, the smile still not leaving his face.

...

4 October 1979

It took longer than usual to recover from the full moon. Remus reckoned this was because of the knowledge he had acquired from his mission, or maybe it was just stress, but something had changed.

The wolf had left more scratches on all of the marauders, even leaving a new scar on Remus's chest. Yet, this was nothing he couldn't handle as he had been doing so since he was five.

Leilani had slipped him a note before he left —one he had no idea was in his pocket until Sirius found it— that told him the name of the forest the pack could be found in. So, hoping it was not a trap, he trusted Leilani and apparated away from his flat.

It appeared like Leilani had been anticipating his arrival because as soon as he arrived she ambushed him with a question.

"Are you on the registry?" She asked him in an annoyed tone.

Remus wasn't particularly fond of lying, but he found himself compelled to do so in this situation. The lie would wrap everything up in a neat little package.

Leaving because he was on the registry would make sense because if he hadn't shown up at the ministry, they would get suspicious and trace him back to the pack. Then, they would eventually figure out there was a large group of werewolves running around, which is what the pack didn't want. The ministry would warn the public and their cover would be blown.

"Yes," Remus spoke before he could hesitate any longer.

"I knew it! Are you alright? Did they use silver on you?" Leilani glanced him over to check for any obvious injuries.

"No, not this time," Remus responded quicker now having fully caught up with the lie.

He had heard the horror stories from the werewolves that went to the Ministry during a full moon and never returned the same. Putting yourself on the werewolf registry was basically a death sentence, especially since the war started. The prejudice had only worsened.

"Good, that's good... I was worried about you, Remus," Leilani pulled him in for an unexpected hug.

He had a feeling that the hug was more for her than him, but he didn't mind it. It was comforting in a sense that she knew what he had been through and was not about to burn him at a stake.

Of course, the marauders understand to a certain level what he goes through, yet this felt different since she was also a werewolf. It was a good different.

...

10 October 1979

Remus found himself carrying wood for the fire with Leilani one late afternoon in preparation for a cold night. As fall continued, the nights grew bitterly cold and a nice fire always helped with that.

"So, Remus, I've shared my bite story, I feel like that's usually a swap situation," Leilani poked him in the arm at which he stuck his tongue out at her.

"Oh, alright, I was wondering how long it would take you to ask," Remus said casually. "It was a cold, dark night-"

"Boring, let's skip all the details I knew you were bound to include," Leilani interrupted with a cheeky grin across her face.

She was smiling more frequently these days. Leilani didn't really understand why because nothing obvious had changed, except for the fact that Remus had befriended her, but why would that change her mood so dramatically?

"So, just the basics?" Remus asked.

"Yep, just the basics," she confirmed.

"My dad was one of the men in charge of creating some of the new werewolf laws, which angered a lot of people, including Greyback."

"I don't like where this is going already," Leilani spoke just as he paused.

"Well, I'd have to call you crazy if you did," Remus responded before continuing the story. "So, Greyback cornered my dad one day and told him that if he didn't stop putting up new werewolf restrictions, then something bad would happen."

"I'm guessing your dad didn't take him seriously," Leilani stated as she picked up a stick from the ground.

"Ding, ding, ding! That made Greyback even madder, which led to him biting me," Remus shivered at the memory.

"What did your dad do after that?" Leilani asked cautiously.

She had never had a real friend before. Remus was the closest thing that came to that, but she wasn't sure if she could call him a friend yet. Greyback only gave her the means to survive and left her out on her own for everything else.

This meant she was new to the whole socializing thing, it didn't come naturally to her either. So, she didn't want to cross any lines with Remus when it came to talking about his family, but it seemed that he was pretty open about it.

"He became a drunk and lost his job at the Ministry. My mum never had the courage to leave him like she should have," Remus sighed in a disappointed manner.

"I'm sorry, Remus."

"S'all right, I grew up and made some friends-"

"What's that like? Having friends?" She asked quite bluntly.

Remus almost made an odd face at the question, but then he remembered how alone he was before he went to Hogwarts. It wouldn't do any good for him to make Leilani feel worse about not having anyone to talk to except for Greyback.

"It's one of the most amazing things imaginable, Leilani, and I couldn't live without them," Remus smiled at the thought of them.

She hadn't ever seen as pure a smile as the one that Remus had shown her. It made her want to ask more about his friends just to see if his smile would never leave.

His smile seemed to light up his entire face. The scars etched deeper into his face, but that was just apart of him. He had deep dimples too she realized quite quickly, almost as quickly as she realized she was staring. Staring.

"Shit," Leilani spoke abruptly.

"What? What happened?" Remus grew worried fast.

"Nothing, no worries," she said, trying to convince him, yet her next action contradicted this.

Leilani turned around back in the direction of the camp and started to run, in turn leaving behind an extremely confused Remus, but she had bigger problems on her mind.

She was catching feelings for some guy she hardly knew.

So, she ran and ran and ran, until she reached the camp where she found a tree stump to sit on and breathe. She quite literally just ran from her problems. There were about ten minutes of peace before Remus came up behind her and spooked her.

"Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yep, totally fine."

She was royally fucked.

...

Author's Note:

I picture Leilani as Florence Pugh, do with that what you will. How do we like Leilani so far?

^^That's Florence Pugh

This chapter was centered around Remus, so I hope that was alright. I really enjoyed writing about his mission, more to come on that. 😉

Would you all be interested to read about the pack during a full moon? I haven't really written much about Remus's full moons in the past, but this could be something I'm willing to do if it sounds interesting to you all.

Short poem for this chapter to show the narrator's guilt about not being a better partner while their boyfriend was alive. Any theories about that yet?

There was lots of development plot-wise this chapter, so I hope y'all kept up with it. (Although, I'm sure you could because y'all are quite capable humans.)

Lmao anyways thanks for reading
-teddy🔮