4 January 1980

Just as they got settled into the new year, Remus had scheduled a follow-up meeting with Dumbledore to speak about his mission. Remus also planned on bringing Leilani with him, secretly hoping that Dumbledore would allow her to learn some magic.

Remus could only imagine what it would feel like to be a part of a community, but only graze the outside edges of the culture. He had almost been the same way, and he would've been if Dumbledore hadn't allowed him to attend Hogwarts.

Why had he chosen Remus? What made Remus special?

That question had haunted him throughout his Hogwarts education. It gave him anxiety and fear about not living up to whatever standards Dumbledore held him to.

"Remus, Miss Prewett, please sit down," Dumbledore said calmly.

Merely being in the room with Albus Dumbledore was enough to make Leilani jump out of her skin, but when he addressed her in such a way it sent her over the edge. Leilani hadn't used her last name in years. She reckoned that when Remus had told Dumbledore her name he had remembered her as the daughter of her parents —they had gone to Hogwarts after all and Dumbledore seemed to know everyone that went to Hogwarts.

"I wanted to ask you, sir, if Leilani would be able to start to practice magic," Remus's curt tone threw her for a loop.

She received the notion that he was irritated with Albus Dumbledore for some reason. They had spoken briefly before about how Remus had been allowed to attend Hogwarts, and then they had talked about bringing up her own magic education with Dumbledore.

"That could be arranged, yes," Dumbledore spoke kindly.

Leilani smiled brightly, she never believed she would be able to practice magic legally. It was all she dreamed of since she was a little girl, and she had believed that the chance had been taken away from her permanently when she was seven.

Remus's features softened at the sight of her smile. He was no less frustrated with Dumbledore, but he appreciated the fact that he was giving Leilani fair treatment.

"I ask now for Miss Prewett to leave the room so we can discuss more private matters unless there was anything else to add," he made eye contact with both of them before Leilani shook her head no and left the room.

As the door clicked shut behind her, Remus nearly burst from the growing temptation to shout at the man in front of him. Tidal waves of emotion were crashing around inside of him, and he didn't feel like pretending they weren't.

"You tricked me into imprisoning those werewolves!" Remus said with his voice dangerously low.

The headline had shocked everyone nationwide. Intentionally being transparent, it had been reported that werewolf after werewolf had been caught and sentenced to Azkaban for intentionally failing to follow Ministry guidelines.

"They were murderers, Mr Lupin," Dumbledore looked at him through his half moon spectacles. "Surely you don't have sympathy for murderers?"

"You're telling me every single werewolf is a murderer? Why treat me any differently than them?" Remus asked, still sticking up for the pack.

"Werewolves have been known to kill-"

"G'day to you," Remus stormed from the headmaster's office with his jaw set.

...

12 January 1980

Mary wouldn't lie, ever since she had seen Leilani and Remus kiss at Potter Manor, she had been trying to avoid both of them. She knew in the back of her brain that it really was none of her business, yet she couldn't help but feel awkward.

However, when Leilani had shone up at their door complaining about being bored, Mary couldn't turn her away. So, they sat in the living area playing chess. Leilani had actually been trying to learn for a while now, and she was improving a decent amount, but she was nowhere near being close to beating Mary.

Somewhere in between their second and third game, chess had started to bore the two girls, and feeling the chill of the outside air inside the flat, caused them to bundle under the thickest blankets.

"So, what's going on with you and Remus?" Mary asked, wriggling her eyebrows.

She didn't know what compelled her to ask, it was like the question had been jumping out of her mouth as soon as she opened it. Although Mary couldn't find it within herself to regret it either because —sue her, she was a nosy person in nature.

"M'not sure really, to be honest, but I do like him," Leilani flushed at Mary's bluntness.

"That's good! I'm so happy for you!" Mary said enthusiastically.

She had let her face fall momentarily —Leilani was too busy hiding her face to see this— but Mary managed to plaster on a fake smile quickly. She didn't like how happy news like this about Remus had an effect on her. How come she couldn't just get over him the same way he had her?

You know what they say, fake it till you make it.

...

15 January 1980

James was accompanying the Prewett twins on a short Order mission. This entailed him staying overnight at an undisclosed location and finding specific information about the Death Eaters.

Lily didn't know that much about the mission itself, but she didn't really care. All that had been circulating her brain for the last twelve hours was what would happen if he didn't come home.

Naturally, Sirius Black had known exactly what Lily would be facing without James by her side, so he showed up at her doorstep with his usual grin --although he would admit that his grin had lost some of its sparkle-- ready to console her.

"What was the first insult I gave James?" She asked through the door after Sirius had rung the doorbell.

"You called him a slimy hippogriff in first-year," he chuckled at the memory, "what's my favorite holiday?"

"Halloween, it's a sad excuse to get sloshed," Lily snorted in reply and magically unlocked the door.

They hugged for a moment at the doorstep before proceeding to the kitchen. Sirius had learned that the first step in comforting someone was making tea, but it appeared that Lily had already made herself a cup of tea.

"How are you doing, Lilikins?" Sirius asked with a worried expression as Lily sighed tiredly.

"Not good, I think it's the fact that there's a baby inside of me and my husband is actively fighting in a war," Lily smiled sarcastically.

"James is smart and he knows how to duel extremely well," Sirius reminded her.

"But Sirius, he's like a moth drawn to a flame when danger presents itself, he always ends up in the thick of it!" Lily raised her voice slightly and Sirius winced.

"He'll survive for you and your child. James isn't going anywhere anytime soon," Sirius pulled her into his chest for another hug.

They hadn't made it five minutes before being interrupted by a message patronus sent by Dumbledore asking Lily to come to Hogwarts.

"What if-"

"He sounded too calm for it to be about James," Sirius said instantly reading her mind.

"Can you come with me?" Lily pleaded.

"You know the rules-"

"Since when has Sirius Black listened to rules?" Lily raised an eyebrow despite her growing anxiety.

"Touché, but I can't go into Hogwarts without an invite, and I'm not planning on being mistaken for a Death Eater anytime soon," Sirius replied, hugging her goodbye.

Lily apparated on the spot after Sirius said he would return to his flat if she needed him. Nearly throwing up after apparating, she took a few steps to steady herself before continuing down the Hogsmeade street. She should really ask if getting nauseous every time after apparating is normal...

Not really considering whether the trip was shorter because she had walked so quickly, or if her anxious thoughts just wanted her to believe that, she arrived at the headmaster's office door and it was opened for her promptly.

When she entered, she was met with the faces of Dumbledore, Annie, Julia, and Annie's older brothers. Judging by the fact that there were tears streaming down Annie's face, and Lily had only seen her cry a few times, she was not about to receive very good news.

"Sorry for calling you here on such short notice, Lily, but we think it's best if Annie stays with you for a few days," Rodger spoke without explanation.

What the actual fuck?

Lily could never find a reason to like the Potter brothers very much. She was never able to explain it very well, but she hadn't liked interacting with them much at all. It was a blessing that James was only really close with Annie.

"Bloody hell, Rodger, would you please explain why before you give someone else cardiac arrest?" Rafe rolled his eyes at his brother's tactlessness.

"Our dad died," Annie's blunt voice swallowed the room whole.

Lily was filled with sorrow and white hot rage at the same time. The fact that her brothers couldn't support Annie, and they were asking Lily to showed just how much they cared.

"Why can't you make time for your sister when she so obviously needs you?" Lily asked, taking a steadying breath so she didn't start shouting.

"The funeral plans-"

"Annie needs support, bastards! I'd love to take care for her, but you're her brothers!" Lily's voice grew in volume slowly, picking up momentum with her anger.

"It's fine, I'd rather stay with you anyway, Lils," Annie stood up from her chair next to Julia.

Wiping under her nose with her sleeve, she walked over to Lily for a hug she so desperately needed. Lily made a promise right then and there that she would always be there for Annie Potter because she deserved more than the world was willing to give her.

...

Before Mary found out she was a witch, she was convinced her first job was going to be working in a coffee shop. Something about the smell of the coffee grounds had attracted her to them, or maybe it was the fact that one of her most prominent memories from her parents was them sharing a cup of coffee almost every morning.

It was like little Mary's dreams had come true when she worked her first shift at a wizard's coffee shop. Magic had never failed to amaze or amuse her, but she found working at a wizard's coffee shop to be far better of an experience than what she imagined a muggle's coffee shop to be. There were many more whistles and gadgets, and it was much easier to brew coffee with a wand.

Her customer service skills appeared out of thin air when serving customers. Mary didn't know she was a natural at retail working, or she would've considered it more seriously than she had originally.

A man with red hair and vibrant green eyes walked up to the counter in navy blue Ministry robes. She would have to ask Sirius what the color meant, and she would mention to Lily how she saw someone else that looked like a walking depiction of Christmas.

"I'll have my regular," he said, looking down at his bag of coins.

"I'm sorry, I'm new here," Mary said apologetically.

Mary soon learned that the redhead's name was Reginald Cattermole and that he worked in the Magical Maintenance department of the Ministry. She had no idea how they had even started their conversation, but it was drawn to a close when his lunch break was about to end.

"See you around!" Reginald said over his shoulder with a smile on his face.

"See you," Mary smiled back at him.

...

16 January 1980

Reminiscing is a dangerous game. It can lead you to avoid your problems and grief by focusing on the past, instead of the present. The memories become better than the present, and then what do you have?

You trick yourself into believing that everything was alright because you're living in the past. It distracts you, and it works for a while.

But what happens when the memories fade and there's nothing left?

As dangerous of a game it was, Annie couldn't find it in herself to care. She sat on a stool in Lily's kitchen with a mug of tea with glossed-over eyes and a hollow expression upon her face.

"It could do some good to talk about it," Lily suggested as she drank her own tea.

It had been like receiving the silent treatment. Lily, of course, did not blame Annie at all. The girl was grieving her father! Yet, when Lily's parents died, she found that, although painful, talking through it was helpful.

"When I was little, I was fascinated by muggle swing sets. So much so, that my dad took me to a muggle park just so that I could swing on the swing," she swallowed thickly. "Well, I can't remember exactly, but this kid pushed me off the swings, and I balled."

Lily encouraged her to continue with the story as Annie paused to look up at her. The vacant look in her eye hadn't vanished completely, although it wasn't what Lily saw the majority of in her hazel eyes. She mostly saw sadness.

"My dad waited until the kid left, and then he sat on one swing while I sat on the other. It doesn't seem like much in hindsight-"

"It's the little things that mean the most," Lily interrupted, maintaining eye contact. "I remember my dad sat with me in the dining room and colored with me, which doesn't seem like a lot in hindsight either, but, at the time, it meant the most."

They resolved into silence once again. That was until someone knocked on the front door. Lily got up urgently with her wand in hand. Before opening the door, she looked through the peephole and saw a familiar pair of hazel eyes.

"What color did Sirius try to dye my hair last week and why didn't he succeed?" Lily asked through the door.

"Blue, and because Remus took the dye and put it in Sirius's hair," James answered quickly. "When was the first time I drank fire whiskey?"

"You were twelve, and it was an accident. You mistook it for something else," Lily replied as she opened the door.

Lily could see the prominent eye bags under her husband's eyes, which meant he had been sleeping just as much as she had. Hugging him shortly —only because Lily felt that Annie needed James more than she did— Lily directed James to Annie, who's eyes had filled with tears, prompted by her cousin's arrival.

"Fuck, he's gone," Annie's voice swayed under the pressure of her emotions. "He's gone. No, no, no," she shook her head in denial and sank to the floor on her knees.

James ran forward to Annie. He was undeniably tired from his successful mission, but he had forgotten that in an instant when he saw Annie.

"He's gone. He's gone," Annie repeated the mantra as James hugged her to his chest while they sat on the floor.

Life was cruel, everybody knew that. Yet, nobody truly understands until something so precious is taken from them. Fathers, mothers, and children, left the world everyday, but people didn't like to draw attention to that. They'd rather be in the dark until it's too late.

...

The Sun Doesn't Always Shine
Poem #4: Free

Would I be better off where he is?
Where he could wrap me in his arms,
never letting go,
where he is mine and I am his.

Would I be carefree in the clouds?
Where I could escape the crowds,
and never leave his side,
where there is no need to hide.

...

18 January 1980

Bed head and all, Annie woke up from what felt like two hours of sleep with the gracefulness of a whale. She walked into the kitchen rubbing her eyes while bumping into a wall carelessly until she saw her three brothers sitting at the table with James.

Her previous tiredness melted away at the sight. They were talking about burying their father as if it was no big deal. The moment they had received the news they wanted to get it done and over with so they could return to their pretty little lives and never worry about it again. Annie was willing to bet that they wouldn't visit his grave too.

Lily, who was going to return to the table after a quick trip to the bathroom, had caught sight of Annie's colorless face, and quickly pulled Annie into Lily's bedroom before she shouted at her brothers. Lily wouldn't have stopped Annie if she truly wanted a go at them —Merlin knows they deserved it— but James was fragile right now too, and she knew that seeing the family ripped apart in front of him would be too much as of right now.

"Breathe, Annie, breathe," Lily urged the younger girl as she sat on the bed.

Annie laid back onto it and discovered the ceilings had gained constellation paintings since she had been there last. Smiling slightly, she drew mental lines between each star and slowly calmed herself down.

After what she was sure was at least fifteen minutes, she sat back up off the bed to survey the room. Annie watched as Lily put her laundry away into the correct drawers, which was hypnotic in its own weird way.

"Lily, are your ankles swollen?" Annie squinted to make sure she wasn't making up ailments.

"Oh! I nearly forgot to tell you," Lily said like she truly had forgotten that she was pregnant. "James and I are going to have a baby!"

"Really!?!" Annie asked in clarification, this was the first piece of good news she had gotten in what seemed like months. "Merlin! I'm going to be an aunt!"

Lily didn't even have the heart to correct Annie as the girl dove in for a hug. She was just glad that she could see Annie's smile again.

...

24 January 1980

Grey clouds marked the occasion as a dismal one. Annie was slightly hoping that the day would be a sunny one instead so that she could point it out and make a crude joke. Yet, it seemed that it was more evident now than ever that the odds weren't in her favor.

The funeral itself would be happening outside a chapel in some town Annie couldn't remember the name of. Hopefully, it was somewhere her dad would've liked.

If they were muggles, then they would've had to wait for the ground to unfreeze to bury him, but with magic, it appeared that nearly anything was possible.

In attendance a few of her dad's friends had shown up, along with Euphemia and Fleamont, and Annie, Lily, and James. Julia had made a surprise entrance as well while explaining that Minnie had granted her a pass.

"I hope the place he's at now is as nice as they say it is, I think he deserves that," Annie said as her, Lily, and Julia sat on a bench after the funeral.

Lily planned on bringing the girls to an ice cream shop after James was done speaking to everyone. She had also promised Dumbledore that she would bring Annie and Julia back either tomorrow or the day after, so there would have to be a discussion about that too.

"Somewhere the sun is always shining and the bees buzz. He was always fascinated by bees," Annie added offhandedly. "I hope I'm making him proud."

"You are, you're making him proud," Julia said, with a sure tone.

"You think so?"

"I know so," Lily said in return.

Why the world had to be so cruel to Annie she had no idea, but she would never forgive it for that.

...

Author's Note:

Lots of Annie and Lily interaction in this chapter, which I love even if it is sad. Nothing too plot-changing in this chapter. Although, the plot-changing stuff starts to happen after Harry is born. *hint hint*

I can't wait for chapter eighteen...

Lmao anyways thanks for reading
-teddy🍋