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"Juyeon really is drowning. In fiery despair, and all the things he never dares to say. In the fear of losing Hyunjae, without ever having him, and the dreadful realization of what actually having him, would label Juyeon as."

[...]

"Chanhee is gentle moans and aggressive kisses. Temptation glazed over soft skin, and moonlight caught in ebony eyes. A siren breathing burning lust into Younghoon's lungs. And Younghoon is ready, waiting for the fire to spread."

[...]

"Jacob's love for Kevin is eternal. It is pure, and it is timeless. Like love-letters scribbled down on striped notebook paper, passed around in class. Like blowing Dandelions on a summer's day, and a suburban home with a white picket fence.

And Jacob will fight until his dying breath, to make Kevin smile the way he used to."

[...]

(some parts will be slightly altered
to fit into the chapters)

this story is, of course, all fiction. everything besides the names, has been made up in my own silly head - heavily inspired by the bf-material reveal album scans.

don't get mad at me, I do know that hyunjae's real name is lee jaehyun, but I have chosen to only refer to him as hyunjae/lee hyunjae in this story. being a multi-stan is hard, okay, and I am dumb, I got confused every time I typed jaehyun, so I had to change it. I will also only use Jacob and Kevin's English names.

english is not my first language, and sometimes I am blind to my own mistakes. I apologize in advance. I am also back to writing in present tense, but after a long time of doing only past tense, I might slip up here and there. I will do my best to re-re-re-read before publishing, of course.

I've also really tried my best with this story. I know I've said that too many times before, but I hope you guys will see the improvement as well! Fingers crossed!

I do not ship idols in real life. As mentioned before, everything here is fiction, so don't come for me. I also hope you will enjoy this story, even if the main ships aren't your favorites. I don't write for the sake of the ship, I chose ships that inspire me - for the sake of the writing.

you've clicked on a mature-rated story, if you're not old/mature enough to read it, it's on you. I don't put warnings at the beginning of the chapters, as I see them as spoilers for the plot. So, read at your own risk.

I am warning you now, only this once:

This story will contain: a lot of angsty sh*t, bxb romance, sexual scenes, swearing, drinking, mention of self harm, mental and physical illness, smoking, etc. etc.

had to put this one, lol. hyunjae is my TBZ bias (him, and kevin), but if you've read my other stories, you will know I'm always mean to my bias. So, please don't think I hate him or anything, because I really don't!