❝you're my obsession.❞
─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

SEEING THE SOMBER LOOK ON LIZ FORBES' FACE FELT ALL TOO FAMILIAR, BUT CHARLOTTE DIDN'T LET THE GUT-DROPPING FEELING STOP HER FROM FINDING JEREMY. She shot a brief look in Mrs. Donovan's direction, but once she saw Jeremy, she disregarded everyone else and wrapped him up in a tight hug.

She felt his shoulders shake slightly and she pressed up on her tiptoes, trying to hold him like he wasn't four inches taller than her. Like he was still the small baby that her mom had set gently in her arms the day that he was born, and her and Elena went to the hospital with them to finally meet their baby brother.

"Jeremy," She whispers his name, pulling away from him gently as he wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his jacket. "Sit down for a minute, alright? We'll leave soon."

He nods and takes his seat at the kitchen table again, and Charlotte looks at the others sitting there, finding relief at the sight of her best friend's somber face. "Cory,"

He stands, reaching to hug her, and she lets out a deep sigh into his chest, clutching onto him like a lifeline if only for a minute. "Where've you been all day?" He tries to whisper, though it doesn't matter, as the kitchen is silent.

"I was with Damon," She answers simply, eyeing their audience and briefly meeting Tyler's gaze as he narrowed his eyes in her direction. Looking away quickly, she meets Cory's gaze pleadingly. "We got stuck in his car in the storm for a while, and I didn't have service, otherwise I would've texted you. Can I– can we talk somewhere else?"

Cory gives her a wary look but nods slowly, pulling her towards the kitchen door. They step outside into the brisk air, and Cory crosses his arms over his chest as the wind whips around them. "What happened, Charlie?"

"Do you know anything about the tomb?"

Cory hesitates, shaking his head.

"In 1864, when the Council rounded all the vampires up in the church and set it on fire, they thought they killed all of them, but Emily Bennett helped them escape into a tomb beneath the church and there's been dozens of vampires in there for almost two hundred years."

Cory's eyes widen and Charlotte nods, continuing. "Well, the spell that Emily put on the tomb was lifted and it left the tomb completely open, meaning all of the vampires that were in there are out now. And they aren't happy about the fact that the Council is still running around, and they want revenge. That's what Anna's mom, Pearl, was talking to Damon about the other day, you know?"

"Does the Council know about this?"

"No," Charlotte shakes her head. "And today, Stefan got taken by a group of the tomb vampires looking for revenge, so me, Damon, and Alaric all went rescue him, and–"

"Wait, Alaric? Are you talking about Mr. Saltzman? Our history teacher?"

Charlotte grimaced. "Yeah, turns out he was married to Isobel and he thought that Damon killed her, so he came here to try and kill Damon, but then he found out that Damon didn't kill her, he just turned her into a vampire, and then Damon killed Alaric, but he's got this ring that like– I don't know, makes him unable to die. So, he helped us get Stefan in return for Damon's help finding Isobel."

Cory's eyes fall shut and he shakes his head exasperatedly. "I hate this town– I hate it here. What happened with Stefan, is he alright?"

Charlotte nodded. "He's fine. I–" She stops, stuttering far too noticeably for Cory to drop the subject. "He's fine."

His eyes narrow and he tilts his head, gesturing at her with a wave of his hand. "You wanna... try that again, maybe?"

"Look, you can't tell anyone, okay? Damon and Elena can't find out."

"Oh, my god, did you–"

"I let Stefan feed on me."

Cory stops, jaw clicking shut before it falls open again, uncontrollably agape. "I... I don't know what to say here."

"He was in really bad shape, but there was a vampire trying to attack us and he needed to have strength, so I just," She pulls her sleeve up slightly, showing the bandage on her wrist before hastily pulling her jacket back down over it. "It saved both of our lives, and I don't regret it, but it's– we both agreed that it was best not to tell anyone, okay? So you can't run your mouth about it, Cory, I'm serious."

He holds his hands up in surrender, shaking his head. "I don't even– I have nothing to say. As far as I'm concerned, you never told me, okay? I'm just... you're insane, you realize that, right? That was ridiculously dangerous of you to do, Charlie, and not even just because of the fact that he's a Ripper, but because the other vampire could've smelled your blood at any given point, and it might not have worked out in your favor, and–"

"Cory." She slaps her hand over his mouth, cutting his rambling off. "What happened to having nothing to say?"

He nods beneath her hold and she slowly releases her hold on him, dropping her hands back down at her sides. "Right. Sorry. So, uh– anything else?"

"Yeah, there was a point to me telling you all of this."

"Besides sending me into an early grave due to stress? Shocking. What is it, then?"

"I need you to teach me how to kill a vampire."

"That's– okay. Um," Cory lets out a sigh, throwing his head back with a low groan. "You want me to train you to be a vampire hunter, is what you're asking."

"Not–" Charlotte huffs, shrugging. "I don't want to be a vampire hunter, I just want to be able to defend myself and not have people worry so much about my safety that they can't focus on the task at hand,"

Cory raises a brow, eyeing her knowingly. "You mean like rescuing Stefan."

"Sure, if that's what it is, yeah. I don't really care, I just– look, I don't want to become a vampire, and in order to do that, I need to not die. So my best chance at that is knowing how to defend myself against vampires, right? My logic is flawless here, Cory, just agree with me."

Cory is quiet for a moment, dutifully ignoring the painful pull of Charlotte's doe eyes, because nobody on planet earth could say no to them. "I..."

"Cory, please,"

He sighs. There was no fighting chance, not when he knew she was right. The best way to avoid her dying was to teach her how to protect herself. He just didn't really think it would ever have to happen. He didn't think he'd have to be the one to do it.

"Fine. Fine. But you–" He cuts himself off, frustrated with life. With everything. "Don't be dumb about it, okay? You have to be smart. Once you– once you get the hang of it, you can't just rush into situations without thinking about them. Because that will get you killed, and if you die, I swear to god, Charlotte, I will summon your ghost back here and yell at you so much."

"I know, Cory. I promise I won't be dumb, okay?"

Heaving another sigh, Cory reaches for the handle to the door, nearly frostbitten and exhausted from the day's events. "I'm going home with you, I don't even want to think about going home right now."

Charlotte nods as she leads them back into the kitchen, and Cory lays a protective hand on her back, not without shooting a quick glare in Tyler's direction when he sees the boy's eyes roam over Charlotte in a seemingly mournful way that kind of makes him want to lunge across the table and tackle him.

"Jer, are you ready to go?"

The younger boy nods, looking every bit as pitiful as he is as he follows his big sister towards the front door, watching as she goes about the room, giving a hug to every crying face scattered about.

"I'm so, so sorry for your loss, Mrs. Donovan," Charlotte hugged the woman, feeling her trembling hands pat her back. "If you or Matt need anything, just call, alright?"

Kelly smiles shakily, giving her a grateful nod that Matt mirrors before bringing her into a short hug.

"Love you, Matty," She leans back, kissing his cheek. "I'll see you later."

"Thanks, Charlie," He mutters low, voice thick as he holds back his tears that Elena had barely managed to stop. "Love you, too."

Charlotte gave him one last useless, but comforting smile before she left with Jeremy and Cory in tow, giving her twin a short nod goodbye, knowing Elena would be staying behind for Matt.

Jeremy climbed into the backseat of the car as Charlotte and Cory got up front, and Charlotte started the car before turning to look at Jeremy.

"Are you hungry? Do you want to stop in town somewhere for food?"

He shakes his head, dropping his forehead against the window. "I think I'm just gonna go to sleep,"

Charlotte hesitates, wanting to push more, to get him to open up more, but Cory gives her a silent shake of his head from the passenger seat and she lets out a heavy sigh that falls flat into the silence of the car. She turns back around and pulls away from the curb outside of the Donovan house, hands repeatedly clenching and unclenching around the steering wheel.

Her wrist ached, pulse throbbing in the wound where Stefan's fangs had dug in and tore up her skin. It was bruising already, most likely sticking around for a while even though she wished it would disappear immediately. She'd thought about asking Stefan to heal her shortly after he'd killed the vampire, but he was borderline rabid at that point, and she had already risked far too much by letting him feed off her.

She'd rather feel the ache in her wrist and the pulse of her blood pouring out of her skin, seeping into the bandages, then feel like nothing ever happened in the first place. With the reminder of Vicki's death so fresh and real all of a sudden, she figured it was in poor taste to wish that she was uninjured.

It hadn't occurred to her over the weeks to wonder why she didn't feel such back-breaking guilt over Vicki like she would have anyone else, but it made sense to her now. It wasn't that she felt nothing for Vicki– she felt an outpour of sympathy while the girl was alive and a struggling addict, heading down the same exact path her mother had taken, and somehow it had been Damon to recognize before anyone else what seeing her die would do. He'd sent her home. He told her to look away– to, for once, turn a blind eye to the situation, and that he'd handled it. And he had. Vicki had quickly become a thought she only had in relevance to Jeremy's wellbeing.

But now Vicki was suddenly there again, and she wasn't alive, far from it, in fact, but she was walking around Charlotte's mind like she had never died in the first place. She wished that somehow, Damon could help her turn a blind eye to this, too.

"The light's green,"

Charlotte startles slightly, glancing at Cory before looking through the windshield at the bright green stoplight. She gave him a short nod and began driving again, dutifully ignoring the prodding gaze her best friend had on her profile.

It wouldn't do either of them any good if she told him what was on her mind.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Charlotte walked out of her room just as Stefan walked out of Elena's, and she winced audibly when he bumped into her, unintentionally harsh.

"Oh, god– sorry," He wrapped his hands around her arms, steadying her on her feet as she quickly waved his apology off.

"No, you're good, it's– it's fine," Her eyes shot to Elena's closed door and she looked back up at Stefan inquisitively. "Are you leaving already? I was just about to sneak up dinner to Elena, if you wanted to stay and eat with us."

Stefan's eyes seem to darken at the word eat, and his hands squeeze her arms the tiniest bit tighter, just under painful. His green eyes fall to her exposed wrist, now decorated with a normal band aid covering the smallest mark still left. Yellowish bruises linger around it, but it seems like none of that matters to Stefan the longer he lingers on it.

The sound of her pulse thuds in his ears, racing in a methodical thump that makes his mouth water with the memory of what the fresh blood had tasted like on his tongue after so, so long.

"Charlotte? You up there?"

Charlotte startles at the sound of her Uncle's voice and she doesn't look away from Stefan as the vampire meets her gaze again, looking lost and dazed. When he calls her name again, closer than before this time, she makes a split decision and grabs Stefan's wrists, pulling his hands off her arms and pushing him into her room against the wall.

She kicks her door shut with her heel and holds a hand over Stefan's mouth as John's footsteps come up the stairs and stop outside of her room.

"Charlie?"

"Yeah, I'm– I'm putting pajamas on, I'll be down in a minute!" Stefan's chest heaves with forced breaths, and Charlotte looks up at him with wide eyes as he switches the position of her hold on him, his fingers brushing over the remnants of his bite mark on her wrist.

"Alright, there's rice and veggies left for you still, but you might have to fight with Jeremy over the chicken,"

"Okay, thanks, Uncle John," Charlotte's voice falters as Stefan presses his finger into the wound, making her pulse throb against his finger.

They're silent still, listening as John's footsteps go back down the stairs, disappearing completely, and Charlotte slowly moves her hand away from his mouth with relief hitting her.

Veins crawl up beneath Stefan's eyes and he squeezes his eyes shut, groaning under his breath as he tries to get them to disappear.

Charlotte's brows furrow and she pulls at his hold on her, making him snap his darkening eyes up to hers again. "Stefan... are you alright?"

"I," He pants, voice almost a growl. "I need to go. I'm sorry,"

Charlotte flinches as he suddenly disappears, and she turns to look at her open window, curtains billowing in the soft breeze.

Letting out a shaky breath, Charlotte barely thinks as she opens her door and walks downstairs to the kitchen.

John is still sitting at the table when she enters the room and he gives her a once over, brows furrowing. "I thought you were putting pajamas on,"

Charlotte freezes, hand hovering over a container of Chinese food as she looks down at the clothes she'd worn to school that day still on her body. "I, uh," She swallows, forcing a small smile on her lips as she shrugged. "I was just so hungry I didn't want to wait."

John laughs, and Charlotte relaxes slightly, grabbing the rice with a trembling hand. "Yeah, I can't imagine the school lunches have improved much since I went there."

Charlotte forces a laugh, the sound hollow and empty as she nods in agreement. "Definitely not,"

Her food tastes like ash in her mouth, and her thoughts linger on Stefan and the way he'd lost himself under the feel of her pulse and the memory of when he'd fed off her.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

The soft knock on the door makes Charlotte stop before she heads back up the stairs, and she turns to open the front door, letting out a relieved breath at the sight of Damon. "Oh, good, you're here,"

"You ask, I come," He steps past her with a smirk. "I'm easy like that."

Charlotte rolls her eyes, gesturing down the hall where Jeremy was sitting at the dining table eating. "Keep it down, Casanova. Come on," She gestures at the stairs, turning to head up them.

"No, Charlotte... I will not go to your bedroom with you,"

Charlotte reached out and slapped his arm, pulling him towards the stairs by his jacket sleeve as Jeremy shot them an odd, entirely disinterested look and went back to his breakfast.

"Ah," He let out a sigh as Charlotte stepped into her room, finding Elena already waiting for them at her vanity. "Just like I remembered."

"Don't be an ass," Charlotte scolded, taking a seat on her bed and leaning against the headboard as Damon did the same, grabbing her old teddy bear and holding it against his chest.

"Did you two know that your Uncle's been kicking it with the Founder's Council?"

Charlotte shared an incredulous look with Elena, the twins groaning in unison.

"What?" Their voices echoed together, and Damon's eyes darted between them before he settled his gaze on Charlotte, humming an affirmation of his words.

"Perfect," Elena throws her hands up, shaking her head. "We'll just add that to the growing list of how everything's falling apart."

Damon's eyes narrowed in her direction, and he used his hand to point the teddy bear's arm at her. "What happened to you?"

"Uh, nothing," Elena shook her head, poorly feigning ignorance, if Damon's imploring look was anything to go by. Sighing, Elena quickly conceded, wrapping her arms around herself. "Look, Damon, I'm worried about Stefan. He says that everything's okay, but he's clearly struggling. How long is it gonna take before he's back to normal?"

Charlotte absentmindedly brushed her fingers along her wrist, frown twisting at her lips at Elena's concern for her boyfriend.

"A few days, give or take,"

"It's been a few days," Elena said pointedly, earning a nonchalant shrug from Damon.

"Give, then," He shakes his head. "I don't know. What's the big deal?"

He gets up from Charlotte's bed, dropping the teddy bear into her lap and ignoring her short glare as he wandered over to her dresser and pulled the top drawer open. "Well, maybe his problem is he spent too long not being himself. Oh,"

Charlotte flushes, getting up quickly to snatch her black bra out of his hand and stuff it back into her dresser drawer. "I didn't ask you to come over so you could be crass, Damon,"

He sighs, plucking a picture off her mirror. "It is what it is, sunshine."

"Hey, would you, just–"

He turns away from her, ignoring her attempts to get the photo back from him as he stood by her window. "The Stefan that you know– that Elena loves," He gives her sister a pointed look. "Was good behavior Stefan, reign it in Stefan, fight against his nature to an annoyingly obsessive level Stefan– but if you think there's not another part to this then you have not been paying attention."

Charlotte snatches the picture out of his hands as Elena rolls her eyes at Damon's scolding noises.

"He is not you, not even close."

"Well, he doesn't wanna be me," Damon says easily. "But that doesn't mean deep down that he's not."

He's speaking to Elena, but his eyes are on Charlotte, and he sees the flash of grim reality in her warm eyes. "Mm-hmm," He hums, tilting his head as he brushes their arms together before he steps out of the room, leaving the twins to linger in his very pointed last words.

It doesn't bode well for either of them, but certainly not Charlotte. Neither Damon nor Elena are aware of that just yet, though it seems she may not be able to stop them from finding out if Stefan doesn't get ahold of himself.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"I just can't believe Mom and Dad never told you that you were adopted," Jeremy shakes his head, looking at Elena in disbelief as Charlotte makes a slight noise of agreement from where she had her head on Jeremy's shoulder, barely having walked earlier before demanding Jeremy give her a piggyback ride.

"I'm sure they would've eventually," Elena shrugged, tucking her hair behind her ears.

Jeremy's face twisted slightly and he readjusted Charlotte's position on his back. "Why were you worried about what I thought?"

"Because... I don't know, it's weird going your whole life thinking you're related by blood to someone."

"Does it bug you that we're not?"

Charlotte immediately shook her head. "No, not at all. You're our little brother no matter what. You would be completely lost without your wonderful, perfect sisters in your life, and that's how it'll stay."

Jeremy huffed a slight laugh, sharing a humorous look with Elena even as Charlotte's teasing words settled a bit of nerves in him.

"Mr. Saltzman says you've been doing really good in history now," Charlotte said, glancing down at Elena, who looked nervous to bring up the conversation they'd had with their history teacher at school. "That's really great, Jer, I'm proud of you."

Jeremy smiled shyly, ducking his head at his sister's praise. "Uh, yeah, yeah, he's really been helping me out. He gave me some extra credit and stuff."

"He loved your vampire paper," Elena says, shoulders nearly up to her ears with how tense they were.

Jeremy, oblivious to the twins' knowledge of the creatures, attempted to shrug it off. "Yeah, he thought I had a clever angle."

"What drew you to that subject matter?"

"Uh, I don't know," He sighed, stopping when Charlotte shifted to jump off him and take up walking on his other side. "Boredom, I guess. Or, maybe I'm just as nuts as the long line of Gilbert crazies."

Charlotte and Elena laughed, rolling their eyes.

"The Gilberts aren't crazy,"

"Easy for you guys to say," Jeremy grins, turning to look at both of them. "You're not one."

Elena's jaw dropped and Charlotte gasped, but their eyes lit up with his obvious taunts. "Ouch,"

Charlotte reached up and tugged at Jeremy's hair as Elena leaned forward, knocking her shoulder against him and making him stumble away from them with a laugh.

The siblings all shared smiles, things just a bit lighter between them than normal, despite the mountain of secrets still unsaid between them all.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Charlotte smiled as she and Elena entered the crowded room, Jenna, Jeremy, and John not far behind them.

Her simple black dress swished along her thighs, and the soft taps of her strappy heels were drowned out by the gentle, classical music playing. Her gaze roamed the room and she lifted her hand in a short wave when she saw Damon, his eyes already on her. She thought to go over to him, but Elena was already dragging her in Stefan's direction, the vampire waiting for them at the bar with a grin that was uncharacteristically wide and relaxed.

"Hey,"

"Hey," The man lifted a glass up to her in greeting, giving Elena a kiss on the cheek as he wrapped his arm around her waist. "How are you?"

Elena's brows furrowed almost immediately and she looked at him curiously. "Are you... drunk?"

Stefan cleared his throat, looking away and down at his empty glass. "Uh– okay, I know it's a little weird, but it's really helping me. The alcohol, it, uh, takes the edge off."

"You're totally that drunk high school guy at a party sneaking booze,"

Charlotte laughed softly at her sister's teasing words, and Stefan's disappointed sigh. "I totally am, yeah,"

Sighing softly, Elena looked at her boyfriend. "How worried do I need to be?"

"Oh, no," He quickly shook his head. "You don't need to be worried. It's just until, um," His eyes fell on Charlotte, darkening imperceptibly. "The cravings go away."

Elena nodded skeptically, unaware of the look that Stefan and Charlotte shared over her shoulder, and completely missing the edges of Stefan's smile as he grabbed her arm gently. "Listen, I think we should enjoy it while it lasts. Would you like to dance with me?"

Elena blinks in shock, glancing at Charlotte over her shoulder in surprise before looking back to her boyfriend. "You hate dancing. I usually have to beg you,"

"No, no, no," He corrects her. "You have to beg the sober me. The drunk me there's no begging necessary,"

Elena rolls her eyes fondly, turning to look out at the small space designated as a technical dance floor. "There's really no one dancing,"

"That's because they need something better to dance to," Stefan smiles at Elena, turning to walk away. "Be right back."

"Yeah, that's not gonna work," Kelly Donovan's voice startles the twins, and they both turn to face her, having not heard her approach. "I already tried to bribe the guy with 20 bucks and a date. He said Carol Lockwood has complete control over the music choices."

Charlotte and Elena nod, turning to look at Stefan talk to the DJ, and they share a somewhat knowing look as the DJ nods suddenly, a dazed look in his eye that screams compulsion.

"You'd be surprised what Stefan can accomplish when he puts his mind to it," Elena proves her point with a nod at the changing music, the upbeat tune completely different to the mellow one that had previously been playing.

Kelly makes a victorious noise, setting her drink down on the bar with a smirk. "Thank god,"

She walks off to the dance floor where people are starting to gather and dance, much more impressed with the music now than before.

Stefan walks back in their direction, and gives Elena an imploring look that she silently shakes her head at. He doesn't linger long, instead focusing his attention onto Charlotte and beckoning her out onto the floor with him.

Charlotte's mouth opens and closes a few times, but she joins him nonetheless, making him let out a cheer as he grabbed her hand and spun her around.

Damon and Elena watched in horror from the bar, eyes narrowed in confusion as Charlotte and Stefan danced. "Have I entered an alternate universe where Stefan is fun?"

"I can't tell if him dancing is more surprising, or Charlotte," Elena notes, watching her sister oddly. "Is he gonna be okay?"

"Eventually," Damon says, a smirk plastered on his face despite the burning pit of annoyance and jealousy in his stomach. "One way or another."

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Charlotte let out a surprised noise as Stefan turned her around again, her eyes drifting from where Elena and Matt had been dancing together. "You know, you're a pretty good dancer,"

Stefan smirked, shrugging a shoulder. "I've had a lot of time to practice,"

She laughed softly. "I guess that's true," Her smile faltered slightly, and she looked up at him, eyes full of hesitant concern. "Is the, uh, the drinking– does it really help? I just... I mean, Elena's worried about you."

"It helps," He reaffirms her, eyes drifting to his girlfriend before he looks back down at her. "I wouldn't be doing it if it didn't help."

"Good," Charlotte nods. "That's good. I, uh, I know that you and I don't have the best track record of friendship, but I don't want to see you hurting or anything."

Stefan hummed, turning them around again. "You're too kind, Charlotte, really,"

"I get that a lot," She huffs, smiling wryly as she steps out from him slightly.

She hits a firm figure, an apology already leaving her lips as she turns around to look at the man that's glaring at her with a surprising amount of hostility. "I am so sorry, I– I don't dance much, obviously,"

The man echoes her slight chuckle, though he sounds cold and empty. "Then get off the dance floor,"

Charlotte rears back, her smile falling at his unexpectedly rude words. "Excuse me?"

"That's no way to talk to a lady," Stefan steps forward, face set into a distant, cold look as he stares the man down.

"Whatever," He scoffs and turns to leave, but Stefan yanks him back by his arm.

"I think you need to apologize,"

Charlotte's eyes widen when she realizes Stefan is compelling him, and she shifts uncomfortably as the man's eyes fall on her again.

"I'm sorry."

Charlotte says nothing, just watches as Stefan lets him go before he almost immediately yanks him back towards her again.

"Now say it like you mean it,"

The man's eyes blink to her again, and she flinches at the sheen over them. "I'm really, really sorry."

"Stefan," Charlotte swallows roughly, wrapping her arms around herself. "It's fine."

"Now walk away."

Charlotte watches the man go with a frown pulling at her lips and she lays her hand against her neck as Stefan turns back around to face her.

"Are you okay?"

Charlotte purses her lips and nods, smiling in what she hopes is a convincing way. "Yeah, uh– thanks. I'm– I'm gonna go get a drink. You should dance with Elena,"

She doesn't wait for him to respond before walking past him, unable to stop the chill that goes down her spine when her arm brushes against him. It makes her stomach unsettled, and she frantically searches the crowd for Cory, trying to stop her already-racing heart as she pushes her way through the hoard of people in every room, unable to fight the feeling that this night is going to end horribly, horribly bad.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ─── 

author's note; i think i lied about not making something between stefan and charlotte happen cause i'm kinda into the tension and it makes sense for him to be like ripper obsessed with her... but i promise it's not going to actually happen yk? also wish i could've fit the whole episode into this chapter but it literally would've been like 10k+ and idk if i can handle that sdfsdf

edited and published; 2.27.23. 

- liz