when i was young drugs were bad, they were evil, they were devil made. they still are that hasn't changed but they never tell you how easy it is to get them so don't, they tell you don't hang around those crowds but we all did. being twenty five and struggling to have a pulse on my own is pathetic in every which sense but yet its my life, the life i choose to live cuz when i risk it all i actually feel something. i was forced into rehab after i oded on heroin for the fifth time. my mother and father say that i am not their child anymore but still pay to put me in a good quality rehab center so what do i mean to them? maybe around two months ago a guy came in big celebrity one to he's name was Nikki Sixx he was a tall guy I'd say six foot two? three? big black hair, green eye, oh and fairly skinny. i found he was a very interesting guy. "Avianca Gonzalez line C as in cat." i hate new talking groups they were annoying as fuckin hell so 'talking groups' are these groups they form for us to talk about our feelings, addiction, and a simple way to make friends and so you  have someone who can relate with you on a level. first they put us in lines based on last names i'm line C letters G threw I. then once organized by last names they pick one from each letter to form one whole group. "Avianca Gonzalez group 10 please." group ten had more hardcore cases so people who have oded and or done hardcore drugs such as methamphetamines (meth/molly), cocaine, alpha-pyrrolidinopentiophenone (flakka/ zombie dust) phencyclidine (angel dust), and heroin. obviously their were more but these were the rockstar drugs the ones known by the big guys, the rockers choice. my group was all filled up. and there was Nikki Sixx. "Avi!" he waved at me. i walked in his direction making my way to talk with him i didn't want to be rude. "hey Nikki, looks like we have the same group." we sat down waiting around for the rest to sit. our group counselor was this big shot one his name was Jamie.  "Well hello guys I'm Jamie Sullivan." "Hi Jamie" we all said unison. i'm so fuckin tired of this shit to be honest, tired of rehab it's all bullshit. after an hour session we all headed back to the common area where their were games and shit. i sat on the couch and started reading my book 'Lolita' fucked up book so far but whatever nothing i can't handle. "What we readin Avi?" Nikki was staring at my book from behind me. "Bro you ask this every fuckin time." "I know it's funny how easily annoyed you are." "Suck my dick Nikki." "Gladly but you don't have one." i rolled my eyes at him and flipped him off he was the one person I fucked with besides Sydney. Sydney got released yesterday morning though, she was a hardcore alcoholic. That was her second time in rehab she has two kids that she couldn't afford to lash out on them anymore so she sent herself back she was only 20 too so i prayed she stays sober. maybe an hour had passed since Nikki bothered me. "Avi!" "What." "When your release again?" "Next week, why?" "Well mines is two months from now, so I was wondering if you would be my sponsor and you can get qualified in those 2 months and that would mark you a year sober right?" "Yeah but-" "no if and or buts please Avi." "Fine." "Pinkie promise me." "Fine but why me?" "Cause I wanna bother you for as long as i can and plus your the only person I like here." "Fair enough but you know I have to do the whole 12 steps program and that means less time for me to work." "Well if it makes you feel better I'll give you free tickets." "Tempting but I've already agreed I'm just complaining for shits and giggles." he rolled his eyes and i gave him my address .