𝐬𝐤𝐚𝐢'𝐬 𝐩𝐨𝐯

the mirror's reflection felt almost foreign tonight. the lights around it framed my face in a harsh glow, highlighting every detail—the shimmer of my eyeshadow, the sharp line of my cheekbones, the curve of my lips painted a bold red. 

the dress hugged me perfectly, a deep blue silk that clung to my body like a second skin. it was stunning, elegant, everything i wanted it to be, but beneath it all, my heart raced.

i stared at my hands, slightly trembling, despite the countless deep breaths i'd taken. i tried to ground myself, to pull strength from the air around me, but all i could think about was what could go wrong. 

what if i tripped? what if i forgot the lyrics? what if i'm just... not enough? i shook my head in an attempt to get rid of the gitters however the more i tried, the worst i felt.

a knock at the door made me jump, my heart skipping a beat. before i could say anything, brandy slipped into the room, closing the door quietly behind her. 

"you good?" brandy asked, her voice soft but firm, "the BET production team told me to let you know that you're on soon."

i gave a small nod, "yeah, it's just... a lot, y'know?"

brandy stepped closer, her hand finding my arm, squeezing gently. "you're skai. you've done this a thousand times. tonight's just another performance."

i let out a breathy laugh, shaking my head. "except this time, it's my first performance since the chicago mess. i just know people are waiting to pick apart this performance."

"let them try and pick it apart," brandy countered, her eyes locking onto mine with that no-nonsense look she had perfected over the years. "but i know you skai, you was born for the stage, your confidence will be restored eventually."

i looked at her, trying to let her words sink in, trying to believe them as much as she did. "what if i mess up?"

"then you mess up," she said, like it was the simplest thing in the world. "and then you get back up, and you show them why you're here. you're not a robot, skai. also your fans are all here for you—because of who you are, flaws and all."

her words hit me like a ton of bricks, but in the best way possible. i'd been so caught up in trying to be perfect that i forgot why i was even here. my fans were here to see me, and hear my voice.

 i glanced back at the mirror, "thank you," i said quietly, my voice steadier now, more sure.

brandy smiled, that proud, flashing me a knowing smile. "you've got this, girl. now go out there and show them what you're made of."

just in that moment my phone buzzes and catches my attention. brandy gives my shoulder a quick squeeze before leaving my dressing room. i couldn't help but smile at dani's message as i read it.

𝐦𝐢 𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐫💗

you got this my little superstar |

"okay skai let's go." brandy says, reappearing at my door. with one last glance at the mirror, i turned and headed for the door, handing my phone to brandy as she walks right behind me. 

 ***

the after party was in full swing, the kind of chaos that only comes after a night like this. music pounded through the walls, a steady pulse that matched the buzz in my veins. 

the room was packed, everyone riding the high of the night—dressed to the nines, laughing too loud, living in the moment. i was still riding my own high, the thrill of the stage and the weight of the award in my hand only now starting to feel real.

i spotted meg first, leaning against the bar, her grin wide and infectious. latto was beside her. as i approached placing my award on the bar, meg caught my eye and raised her glass in my direction.

"i am so happy the award show is now over, so i can get black out drunk!" meg shouted over the music and we clink our shot glasses together.

"girl, no matter how many times i perform, i always get nervous. my ass cheeks were sweating and everythang," latto squealed, her voice rising in mock horror. that broke us all into laughter at latto's exaggerated facial expressions.

"tell me about it," i said, grabbing the bottle and pouring us another round. "let's make a toast to us being the best performers tonight all shade!"

"oh, hold on y'all i think i see my man." latto smirks as she pushes herself off the bar counter. meg and i exchange eye rolls.

"so even around us you don't want to claim yo nigga?" meg smirks.

"i don't know what y'all are talking about." latto shrugs acting clueless with a smirk on her face.

"girl, everyone and their mama know you're dating 21 savage!" i yell over the music, making meg laugh and latto dismiss us playfully as she disappears into the crowd.

meg and i watched as latto slipped into the sea of people, her smirk still lingering in the air. we both shook our heads.

"she thinks she's slick," meg said, leaning in closer so i could hear her over the music. i prepare our shot glasses to pour us another round. "pretending she's interested in what drake has to say."

"for real," i agreed, as we watch her nod her head enthusiastically at whatever drake was saying, whilst remaining very suspiciously to 21. "but he makes her very happy and that's the important thing."

"ain't that the truth." meg held up her glass, and we clinked once more, downing the shots in one smooth motion. 

just then, i felt someone brush against my arm. turning, i saw christian, his smile a little too practiced, his eyes locking onto mine with an intensity that made me instantly wary.

"hey, meg, how you doin'?" he said, his voice cutting through the noise. meg waves at him politely before he turns to me, "mind if i borrow you for a sec?"

meg raised an eyebrow, glancing between the two of us, but i gave her a quick nod. "i'll be right back," i told her, feeling a slight edge creep into my tone.

christian led me a few steps away from the bar, just far enough that we wouldn't be overheard but still within sight of everyone else. i crossed my arms, making sure to remain a safe distance between the two of us.

"you were amazing tonight," he started, his voice smooth as ever. "and you look amazing too."

"thank you christain," i replied, keeping my tone neutral. i knew christian well enough to sense when he was building up to something.

he leaned in a bit closer, his hand brushing against mine in a way that felt too familiar, too intentional. "you know, i was thinking about ditching this party soon, and i was wondering if you want to tag along too."

i blinked and without missing a beat, i finally took a step back, creating a clear distance between us. "christian, i'm actually seeing someone now," i said, my voice firm and leaving no room for misunderstanding. "so we can't exactly hang out like we used to, you feel me?"

for a moment, he looked surprised, like he hadn't expected me to shut him down so quickly. but he quickly masked it with a tight smile. "oh say less, i didn't realise. so who's the lucky guy?"

"or girl." i said, wanting to wrap up the conversation as quickly as possible. the last thing i needed was drama tonight.

"right, i forgot you was bi. well whoever they are, i know they are lucky to have you." he nodded, backing off with a shrug that tried to come off as casual.

as christian walked away, disappearing into the throng of people, i let out a breath, shaking off the awkwardness of the encounter. 

when i got back to the bar, meg was already waiting with fresh drinks in hand. "everything good?" she asked, her eyes searching mine for any sign of trouble.

"yeah," i said, taking the glass from her and downing half of it in one go. "just someone trying to bring me some old baggage."

"ugh, men," meg said, rolling her eyes as she clinked her glass against mine. "although you rejecting that boy means one of two things, you're either over his face or you're seeing someone new."

"i'll leave you to guess which one," i laughed, the tension finally easing as i let myself sink back into the comfort of the moment and meg scoffs.

"first latto and now you, y'all like to act like you're so secretive despite being so obvious." meg says, and i couldn't help but throw my head back in amusement.

***

the next morning, the remnants of last night's party clung to me like a bad hangover—hazy but with a few sharp edges that cut through the fog in my mind. 

i rolled over, squinting against the too-bright light filtering through the curtains, hoping to drift back to sleep. then, my phone buzzed sharply on the nightstand, dragging me fully awake.

groaning, i reached for it, expecting the usual post-party messages—laughing at the highlights, a few blurry pictures—but what greeted me instead was a barrage of missed calls. brandy, my publicist, even a few friends. a knot twisted in my stomach as i swiped to open the messages. brandy's text sat at the top, stark and alarming.

𝐦𝐨𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐧🎀

call me back asap. it's important |

my heart thudded painfully in my chest. this wasn't good. fumbling, i dialled brandy's number, each ring sending my anxiety higher.

she answered on the first ring, her voice tight. "skai, have you seen it?"

"seen what?" my voice cracked with a mix of sleep and rising panic. "what's going on?"

"someone posted a video of you and christian from last night. it's in the background of someone's instagram story, and now it's everywhere. the way it's framed... it doesn't look good, skai."

my heart sank, a cold dread spreading through me. "what? no, that's not what happened! we were just talking and i just told him i'm with someone else."

"i get that, but the video doesn't show that part. it's bad timing, and destiny is freaking out especially with everything going on with his family. it's already spinning out of control."

i groaned, already imagining my publicist destiny having a panic attack. she warned me to stay clear of christain since his family has been caught up in a lot of controversy lately and i should have known better than to leave meg's side and have a chat with him at an industry party.

"what does the video even look like, send it to me real quick." 

"i can't send it directly," brandy said, her voice edged with frustration. "but you need to see it for yourself. just search for it online, it's everywhere now."

my hands trembled as i hung up and quickly typed in a search for the video. as the results loaded, my heart pounded harder, a sinking feeling settling in my stomach. i found the clip and tapped play, my eyes immediately locking onto the image of christian and me.

the video showed us standing close, too close. we were talking, our faces inches apart, and christian's hand was brushing against mine in a way that felt far too intimate. the angle was misleading, making it look like we were wrapped up in each other's space. the only reason why i was standing so close was because i was trying to hear what he was saying, but of course the video didn't show how i stepped back afterwards.

i hit pause, the image frozen on a frame that made my heart race. this was a disaster. the video made it look like i was being disrespectful and if dani saw this without knowing the context, i don't know how she'll react, especially since she was very vocal on how much she disliked christain in our past relationship.

 i dialled dani's number, my fingers slipping on the screen as I tried to stay calm. the phone rang once, twice... and then went to voicemail. i tried again, my desperation growing with each unanswered call. my stomach churned with every ring, the silence stretching longer than i could bear. with a sinking feeling, i sent a text, trying to explain in a few words what had happened.

𝐦𝐢 𝐚𝐦𝐨𝐫💗

| hey, i need to talk to you. 

| there's a video from last night that makes it look like i'm with christian, but it's not what it seems 

| pls call me when u can

i hit send and stared at the screen, willing a reply to come through. but the minutes dragged on, and the silence remained unbroken. no call, no text back. the anxiety gnawed at me. i was unsure if she was still sleeping or if she was upset, and her being at calabasas with kid cudi didn't help.

i tried calling dani again, my heart pounding with each ring. the growing tension was unbearable, a harsh contrast to the comfort of last night's celebrations. as i hung up for the umpteenth time, i sank onto the edge of the bed. 

"she'll call me back." i told myself, in an attempt to calm myself. as if anything couldn't get any worse, destiny's caller id started flashing on my screen and i already prepared myself before picking up the call.

"skai denise thompson—"

𓏲𝄢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝!