ALL THESE BATTLE SCARS.

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LOST IN FIRE (book three).
°• CHAPTER SEVENTEEN •°

" YOU ARE WONKRU OR YOU
ARE THE ENEMY OF WONKRU!
CHOOSE! "

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        Harley has been in wars since she was seventeen and was sent to a radiated planet to die. She wasn't an active member in them then, only advocating peace. However, this time, she was walking right into the battlefield, a sword in her hand that feels as if it contains the weight of mountains and heavy armor linked together over her shoulders. She's been preparing for a moment like this for six years. A part of Harley expects the enemy to be on the other side already, waiting for them thanks to Clarke, but the field is open and empty. She doesn't doubt they're watching somewhere, she thinks, coming up behind Bellamy from where he was guiding his sister.

He crouched behind a boulder, peering through the scope of his rifle. "Two pillboxes," he observed. "Just like Echo said."

The gray clouds that have swallowed the blue sky float above them at the same time they hear rapid machine gunfire. Harley isn't too startled by it. "Our signal?" She guessed quietly.

Bellamy nodded, taking another close look. "It's working," he announced. "They're moving out."

At his words, Octavia smiled in victory, when they hadn't even won yet. She turned around to face their army, pulling her sword out of her sheath and shooting the long blade into the air. One by one, the army holding different sorts of weapons started to file forward, following the three into the deadly warzone. Harley sent a short gaze to the mountain Bellamy had observed. It seemed small in the long distance between them, lightly draped with snow. She knew her brother was there, and the rest of her family, having a gunfight with a few of the prisoners. She only hoped they were alright.

The only sound that filled the air now was their footsteps as they march in between the silent cliffs on either side. Harley is snapped out of her praying thoughts when Indra squeezed herself in the middle of her and Bellamy, giving them an apologetic stare. "You did your best to stop this," she commented. "In the end, if we have to fight, it's better to win."

"At what cost?" Harley muttered without looking her in the eye.

Indra opened her mouth to reply, possibly to lecture Harley about fighting or surviving. But she's stopped when suddenly there are hundreds of guns firing at them, close and deadly. Harley's head whips around, lost in the crowd of their army, seeing dozens of prisoners pop out of their hiding spots, firing at them. There's more they can handle. Harley can tell just by the shouting of everyone around her, the painful cries, the weak shooting they were countering with. Through it, she hears Octavia's familiar voice scream over.

"Attack!"

She's in the midst of it. Terrified for her life, Harley takes off, running towards the gunfire, pushing past anyone who's shooting in her way. She thinks for a moment that maybe they have a chance at fighting back and winning, that is, if they didn't blow a blaster that holds the power of a mine at them. People scream before they're blown to pieces. The ground below Harley rumbles, causing her boot to get trapped behind her heel and stumble, rolling flat on the dirt. Fresh scratches dig into her palms and tear her pants and she coughs, her lungs filling with dust.

Someone faintly shouts Harley's name. She feels a hand grip the back of her jacket, yanking her up, hard. She's barely back on her feet when she caught sight of Bellamy who's giving her a shove to move. There are already deep puddles of blood that they run through, and Harley snatched a gun next to a corpse, sheathing her sword when knowing how useless it was. She's tugged behind a rock and crouches, panicking, her eyes desperately searching through the ongoing battle. "Where's Octavia?!" She exclaimed desperately.

In a state of despair, Bellamy scanned the battlefield himself before he straightened. "There!" Harley is on his heels when he takes off, seeing Octavia knelt and shooting at the enemy in the front lines.

"Retreat! Go back to the bunker!" Someone shouted, moving to run back the way they came.

"No! Advance! It's the only way!" Octavia was crying out after them. Even though her people are being shot at and blown up, she's still stubborn enough to believe they have a chance.

"O! O!" Bellamy raced to her, seizing her arm and yanking her up.

"It's the only way!" Octavia argued with him, echoing herself.

Harley can see the determination to win, the sorrow knowing that she's too blame for this. But they're being massacred here. "Forget it!" She snapped, grabbing a hold on Octavia's shoulder armor and pulling her. She's making it as difficult as possible, dropping her gun as her boots slid across the dirt. "We're going back or we'll find - "

The words died in Harley's throat at the sound of another blow from behind them. She takes a single glance over her shoulder to see a force hurdling towards the air, straight for them. Bellamy screams at them to run, and she does, full to the brim with terror just as it lands behind them.

An explosion goes off. Harley's ears blow with pain, the force of the bomb hitting her back, hard. Her gun is thrown from her hand. A scream ripped from her throat as her body flies through the air, being spun, her limbs flailing as they search for a landing. She's not in true agony until she finally hits the ground. Her chest gets the worst of the impact. The wind is knocked out of Harley, pain rupturing through her as she makes a choking sound. Her lungs squeezed, desperate for air. All she can do is lay her head down, suck in a deep, shuddering breath, shut her eyes, and surrender.

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A ringing pounds in Harley's ears when she starts to stir. She lets out a small groan, shifting. Pain licked up her limbs. She wonders for a second if the sound if her blood pumping before the memories sunk in. There's no bullets firing anymore. No one is screaming. It's quiet, except for that damn ringing. Harley stretched her jaw open, causing a popping in her eardrum that started to quiet it. She coughed, tasting dry blood. She reached up carefully, lightly touching the inside of her ear, only to feel blood, courtesy of being too close. Her skin must be covered in bruises from the impact too, so bad that she's numb all over. She's just lucky to be alive. She slowly let her eyes flutter open.

When Harley goes to push herself up, a palm rested over her hand. A soft hiss whispered to her firmly. "Don't. Move."

Blinking a few times, Harley cleared her vision, forcing the spots to disappear. She could see a blurry version of Octavia, her face covered in dirt and blood but underneath it all, a worried expression. "Can you hear me?" Octavia whispered.

It's faint but Harley can. "Yeah," she stiffly said. She coughed again, her throat dry. "What... What's happening..."

"They're shooting anyone who moves," Octavia informed her, a twinge of some emotion in her tone. Maybe regret. Harley squeezed her eyes shut, distressed. She feels Octavia's fingers curl around hers. She can't pity her right now, not here. Everyone here is well and truly screwed.

Opening her eyes again, Harley glanced past Octavia's head, seeing Bellamy on the other side of her. "What do we do now?" She asked. Neither of them had an answer. He only pressed his dry lips together. Harley could only press her cheek against the hole in the dirt, bask in the only warmth of Octavia's hand over hers, knowing they can't stay here forever.

The three don't move an inch as hours pass. Harley's muscles have stiffened from the same position, refusing to even shift anymore, afraid she'd be shot. When the sun falls and it's completely black, one of the prisoner's shine a light beam over the dead bodies surrounding them. They're checking for survivors, Harley realizes. She wants to argue with Bellamy's logic that they move when it's dark but if they stay there any longer, they'll die.

"It's dark enough," Bellamy decided. "Next time it passes, we go." Harley cleared her throat, showing she understood. Octavia released her hand, having been holding it the entire time, in preparation to move.

After the bright light passes over them again, Bellamy breathes in deeply. "Now!" Harley jumped up, her boots sliding in the mud that had liquified due to the blood and rain. She catches herself but the second she puts pressure on her right leg, a white-hot pain shoots up. She almost cries out but keeps it down by biting on her lip. Maybe she was shot, cut, she doesn't know. She just knows she can't run. Octavia noticed Harley's staggering and bolted back to her side, grabbing her arm and throwing it over her shoulder.

With Harley able to lean on Octavia's side, she can just barely keep up with Bellamy who's leading them through the path of dead bodies. The light starts to move towards them. "Get down!" He commanded. Octavia throws herself on top of Harley, pushing them both to the ground with a thud. She grunted, feeling the fresh injury burn worse from all the movement. It passes over Octavia's back. "We're clear. Come on," she hears Bellamy urge them.

Octavia grabs Harley's arms, helping her back into a standing position. "We need guns," she declared. She swiped up a rifle, standing protectively in front of Harley, her finger on the trigger.

"O, what are you doing?!" Bellamy demanded. "We'll never make it past those lights."

"Stop!" Harley snarled, putting her left leg forward to launch at Octavia and push the gun down. "You shoot, they'll kill us all!" Octavia still doesn't let go, preparing again to fire. Bellamy stopped her, and it becomes a struggle of fighting over the rifle.

One of them trips over a body that makes a noise, surprising them all. Harley's eyes widen when they pick her head up, seeing Indra, using herself to shield another. "Help," she gasped. Her hand is pressed over the leg below her. "Gaia's hit. It's bad." Gaia is laying on her back, breathing shallowly, her eyes shut.

"Are you hit too?" Octavia questioned, falling beside her. Indra shakes her head. "Okay, we have to get Gaia to Jackson. Come on, Indra."

She goes to tug her arm, pulling away Indra's hand and revealing the open wound on Gaia's upper leg. The prominent hole is heavily bleeding. "No," Indra protested. "We can't move her. Wonkru will come back for us."

Although it was nice to believe that, Harley didn't think it was enough. Gaia was seriously injured, and she may be too soon. "We need to move, now," she stated gravely. Or they were all going to die.

Bellamy nodded in agreement. He put both his hands tightly over Gaia's bullet wound. "It's okay, we got this," he promised.

"First, we stop the bleeding," Octavia proposed.

"Not here," Bellamy disagreed. "Harley's right. We need to move, find cover." His eyes are frantically observing the area before the land on a shadowy pile a few feet away. "They won't see us behind those rocks." Before anyone can move and hide, the beam of light flashed closer to them. "Get down!" Harley falls to her side, throwing her arm over her mouth to bite down on the sleeve of her jacket to not shout in pain.

When it moves on from their hunched over bodies, Octavia is the first one on her feet. "Run."

The group sprung into action. Bellamy lifted Gaia, throwing her limp body over his shoulder as Octavia grabbed Harley in the same fashion as before. Indra picked up a gun, guarding them as they sprint to the pile of rocks. They manage to make it to their hidden spot just as the light shone over their heads and Harley released a breath she didn't know she was holding as Octavia gently lowered her to a sitting position, her back pressed against the rocks.

Gaia is laid back, her head cradled in Indra's lap. Bellamy rushes to take his belt off, tying it tightly around her thigh. "Even if we stop the bleeding, we'll never make it carrying her."

"Save yourselves," Indra tells them. "I'm not leaving my daughter."

"Indra's right. They'll come back for us," Octavia argued, her hand over Harley's shoulder.

Harley isn't sure when Gaia had woken up. But she let out a groan, blinking a few times to stare questionably at Octavia. "Why are you doing this?" She breathed out. "A week ago, you threw us in the pit."

"A week ago, you were a traitor. Next week, you may be again. Right now, you're Wonkru," Octavia corrected her.

Bellamy rolled his eyes. "She thinks when Wonkru comes back, you'll tell the followers of the Flame to follow her back through this gorge."

There's a heavy pause shared between them as they all take in Bellamy's crude, or correct, words. Then Octavia looks away and whispers. "If they don't, everybody dies." She averted her attention back to Harley, brushing her hair off her sweaty forehead. "Let's see that wound."

Together, they work on tucking the hem of Harley's pants, rolling it upward to reveal a deep gash snaking its way up her calf. Her breath hitched in her throat. It's not straight enough to have been done by a blade but it's deep enough to be a problem. It must have been caused by her crashing after the explosion. Octavia has already moved into action, ripping a portion of her cape off and making a tight, perfect knot to slow the bleeding. She cursed under her breath when Harley winced. "Hey, it's okay," she says softly. "Just another battle scar."

One of many. Harley shut her eyes for a single second, every image of every scar permanently on her skin now flashing in her mind. The grounder who cut her at the dropship. The scarred burn marks on her arm from the attack on Tondc. The faded rings around her wrists from the endless times she was held hostage. The ones from countless training with Echo and the rest, and the new addition from Indra's spear on her upper arm when they were in the pit. Those never compared to what emotional trauma she endured herself.

"Thanks, Octavia." Harley is faintly smiling under all the mud drying over her face and crusting blood. Octavia had barely returned it before she picked up the gun she had stolen earlier to keep guard, carefully poised over the rocks.

Gaia made a soft, painful sound, shifting in her mother's arms. Harley can't hear what she's saying, but from the expression on Indra's face, she can tell Gaia's trying to let go. Her heart hurts at the sight of Indra's face twisting into grief, clutching her daughter a little tighter. "No," she protested louder. "Wonkru na komba raun gon yumi. Mo na throu daun, jos ste gonen kom liwa mou, en - " (Wonkru will come for us. They'll fight. Just hold on a little longer, and - )

"Mo nou na komba hir," Gaia interrupted her. "Wonkru ste shada." (They won't come. Wonkru is broken.) Her eyes start to shut as Octavia glanced over, a thoughtful and understanding look. "Ai gonplei ste odon," Gaia breathed out. (My fight is over.) There are heavy tears in Indra's eyes, starting to pour over the white scars on her cheeks.

Bellamy, who had been listening, quickly leaned over. "Hey, no," he argued with her firmly. "What about Madi?" Gaia's eyes fluttered open again when he said Madi's name. "What kind of Flamekeeper leaves a twelve-year-old Commander to fend for herself?" He insisted, encouraging. "Keep fighting. If not for you, then for her." Gaia doesn't have to respond. Despite her pained features, she nodded.

Harley's attention moved to Octavia when she whispered. "Wonkru ste shada." (Wonkru is broken.) Harley can see the devastation that fills her when realizing what she's done and who she's become. "I broke it."

"Yes," Indra agreed, voice wavering but dark as she accused Octavia. "You did."

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When the rag of Octavia's cape starts becoming soaked in Harley's blood, she presses her hand around the wound tightly. She didn't know how much blood she's lost. She doesn't think it's as bad as the injury she sustained years ago when the grounder cut her torso but granted, she wasn't stuck on the battlefield where no one knew where they were. The rain certainly didn't help. Harley knows that no one was coming for them. They were on their own, where she's bleeding badly and Gaia is losing her fight. They still know there's no plan.

When Octavia stands a bit straighter from her guarding position, Harley's head turns to her direction. The light wasn't close to them but it could pass by at any second. "There's someone alive out there," she informed the rest.

Harley could see the shadow as they tried to rise. "Octavia," she began, about to tell her there's nothing they can do. "You can't - "

But Bellamy beats her to it, seizing Octavia's arm and yanking her. "Get down!" He snarled. "They'll see you." Seconds after, a machine gun fires repeatedly and whoever was out there grunted before Harley hear a wet thud.

Affected by another loss, Octavia turned to her brother, her rageful expression matching his. "What do you care if I die?" She spat. "Isn't that what you want?"

Her arm fell back to her side when Bellamy shoved it away. He glared daggers at her before answering her question gravely. "Yes."

The color drained from Octavia's face at the same time Harley's jaw dropped, stunned by how cold he replied without hesitation. He doesn't look at them, returning to Gaia's side while Octavia went back to her post, shoulders tense, attempting to hold herself together. Harley didn't have much room to defend her herself, not after being apart of poisoning her but there had to be something wrong with how he was treating her.

Before Harley can say anything, to either comfort Octavia or against Bellamy for his behavior, Indra, from where she has her hand over Gaia's neck to check her pulse, spoke up. "Her heartbeat is slowing. We need to go, now."

"How?" Harley urged. "We won't make it across the warzone."

Indra doesn't have to think about it. "I'll give them a target," she declared. "The next time they open fire, we run."

"That's not a plan," Harley insisted. "You... You'll..."

"It's all we have," Bellamy pointed out. Harley's mouth clamped shut at the sound of his voice. The last thing she wanted right now was his input but needed it if she wanted them all to survive. "I'll carry Gaia," he offered.

"No." Gaia lets out a shuddering breath. "You're not dying for me."

Suddenly, Octavia spoke up. "She's right." She lowered her gun, stepping over the rubble to crouch where they were huddled. "I may never be able to fix what I broke... But I can save you." Harley feels as if her mouth had somehow gone drier, her stomach starting to churn. "I'm the one they want most of all," Octavia continued. "When they open fire... Run like hell."

"No," Harley struggled to choke out. She's not doing this again. "You've... Octavia, you've made... Mistakes and all, but I'm not letting you sacrifice yourself for all of us." Not when she means the world and more to Harley. She'll go herself if Octavia just stays... But their target wasn't her.

But Octavia gives Harley a sad smile, whose eyes start to water in response. "Omon gon oson," she said softly. (All of me for all of us.) Harley is visibly trembling when Octavia reached out to cup her face. She pressed into the palm of her hand, desperate. She's lost in her desperation to come up with something else, drawn in until her lips are pressed against Octavia's. It's full of as much love as they always shared but with a spark of something else - a good-bye. Harley had always been gentle when she kissed her but this time it's different. Her hands go to her armor, fingers curling around it tightly, terrified for the second that'd come when she'd let go.

When Octavia starts to pull away, she feels Harley's hold tighten. She must have tasted the salt from the tears that had broken free from the dam. She whispered, brushing her lips against hers very lightly. "This is what I have to do for everything I've done... And if I can keep you safe? I don't have to question it." Octavia's hands go to gently pry Harley's off of her to stand.

"Wait," Harley is crying to her, wincing as she started to try and rise with her but Octavia is already moving to stop her, shaking her head. Green eyes meet blue, speaking hundreds of words, all of them full of love and begging her to stay because this can't be it. Although Octavia had made it clear just days ago she wanted nothing to do with her anymore, Harley can see it's different. She is still in love with her even after all she's done wrong. And so does she.

"I love you."

The three words touch Octavia because they're not said so simply. Harley puts all of her emotions in it, silently telling her that she loves her so much more than her own life and would pick out all of the stars in the sky if it meant she never burned out. That their souls were formed to be apart of one another, and there's no way she could go on without the largest piece of her. That watching Octavia give her life for them just made Harley love her more if that was somehow possible.

Octavia's speaking the same way but she leaves the words that Harley heard even when they were unspoken. She knows she can't leave and give her life up, letting Harley think she hates her. "I love you, Harley." She's frozen this time when Octavia fully rose, only to be stopped by her brother who had been silent the entire time. She chooses to say a final good-bye, gazing to Bellamy. She doesn't keep it long. "My brother, my responsibility."

Then she's gone. Harley is numb with the overflow of her feelings, watching Octavia disappear into the nightfall for the gorge. She doesn't even feel it when Indra hauled her up, wrapping an arm around her hip to keep her steady. Bellamy already had lifted Gaia, following their path while Harley limped, her heart starting to shatter painfully in her chest when she hears Octavia fire repeatedly at her target.

"You are Wonkru! Or you are the enemy of Wonkru!" Octavia screamed at the empty sky to the prisoners. "Choose!"

The light is flickering around, searching for its source. It landed on Octavia seconds before her rifle clicked, signaling it was empty. Harley ripped away from Indra who still keeps a grasp on her lower arm, keeping her from sprinting to where Octavia had dropped her weapon. The light shone on her form as she cocked her head, outstretching her arms and slowly dropped to her knees.

Harley's lips part, wanting to let out a wrenched, curdling scream but she knows they'll be spotted and Octavia's sacrifice would go to waste. Instead, she heaved a few dry, strangled sobs of a single word, accompanying the tears pouring like the rain around them.

"No..."

Octavia is panting, shutting her eyes and completely surrendering to them. She bore all of her sins and decided this was how she earned her redemption for them. When she hears a spray of bullets, Harley braced herself for them to pierce Octavia's body.

Harley's broken heart was pounding so fast she was positive it'd beat out of her chest and leave because wherever Octavia went, it was sure to follow.

Instead, Harley watched in budding grief that turned to shock as the rover hurdled into the gorge, the machine gun firing heavily towards the prisoners. Whoever was driving slammed on the breaks and Octavia is stumbling to her feet, slowly backing up, eyes frantically flickering around in search for where she had left the rest.

The back door of the rover popped open and none other than John Murphy hopped out. Harley can see his wide grin even from her distance. He's holding the same blaster the prisoners carry. "Yeah! Somebody call for a rescue?!" He cheered.

A wave of gratefulness washed over Harley. She can't explain how her mood had switched so quickly, but she's not about to turn down the invitation. "Hurry up!" Emori's voice called over her gunfire to urge them. "We're not staying!" Harley, with the help of Indra, is rushing to the rover.

For some reason, Murphy is tossing the blaster when they arrive. Octavia is already helping Bellamy lift Gaia in so Harley pulled away to launch at her brother. She expected some smart-ass remark but Murphy's arms are already open, wrapping around Harley's waist. "Up you go." He easily lifted her, allowing her room to kick her legs forward and find footing in the rover. Octavia is there, helping to lower her in the cramped space beside where Gaia was laid down.

Harley doesn't stop squeezing nor release Octavia's hand. She waited until Murphy, the last one to crawl in, slamming the door behind them, and they take off across the gorge. She uses her free arm to lean to her other side and wrap it tightly over Murphy's shoulders, pressing him close and burying her face into his neck. Harley had started crying all over again, out of pure relief now, crying to him brokenly. "Thank you."

She'll thank the rest later, but for now, Harley felt as if after all of her impossible decisions she finally had a win.