It's been two months since you had been able to see both Reiner and Pieck. You vaguely had remembered them telling you about some Warrior Business they had to tend to overseas. Those two months had gone by so quickly, mostly because of those addictive novels Reiner had gifted to you before you left.

Still, no matter how hard you tried to remember, you could not pin-point a memory on Reiner. Everything about him was so unfamiliar to you still. He was so kind and gentle whenever he talked to you. He worried about you a lot.

Yet you still couldn't figure out why.

Those little thoughts kept growing in the back of your mind.

"Porco that was for Y/N." Pieck scolded the blonde with a disapproving look on her face. She snatched the bag out of his grip and elbowed his side. "Stop eating the food we brought for her. Remember? We."

Porco rolled his eyes and huffed. "I'm sure Y/N didn't mind. After all how is she going to eat all those carbohydrates?"

You blinked back to reality and stared at the two bickering. A small smile crept upon your face at their lively behavior. That smile was suddenly overshadowed by a frown when you spotted Reiner, trudging down the street with dark circles around his eyes.

"Right Y/N?" Porco snaked his arm around your shoulder and pulled you towards him.

"What?" You stared at him, clueless to what he was talking about.

"Didn't know you could be such an airhead." He pinched your cheek and grinned. "Never mind. See Pieck? Y/N says it's alright."

"You idiot." She muttered. Pieck turned her attention to the slow walker. "Finally Reiner! Y/N here was getting so worried. I could just see it in her eyes."

You pushed yourself off the wooden bench and jogged up to him. "You look like a mess Reiner. Are you alright?" You cupped one side of his face in your hand.

Once your face had come into view his expression softened. A part of him wanted to break down in your arms but another part of him wanted to stand strong for you.

"I'm alright Y/N." He gently placed his hand over yours and nodded. "I just need sleep."

"If you were tired you should've went home. I'd be fine with just Pieck and Porco here." The concern on your face never faltered.

"I wanted to see you." He smiled.

Porco watched the two with suspicion growing. He turned to Pieck and tapped her shoulder, "What's with those two? Did I miss something?"

Pieck crossed her arms over her chest and tilted her head. "Reiner still has me in the dark about her.. I don't know who's she is."

That need to care and nurture him jumped out inside of you. He looked so exhausted, his mind seemed like it was slowly being torn apart and you wanted to know the reason why. You wanted to help him.

   That evening Pieck and Porco had returned to their homes early to meet with their parents. You were left with Reiner at the harbor, sitting in pure silence with your feet dangling over the edge. Reiner stood far behind you, leaning against a brick wall.

You watched as the harsh rhythmic percussions of the waves crashed onto the walls. As the sun set over the horizon the sky was set ablaze. Red, orange, and yellow streaks had been painted across the sky. An ombré of various strikingly beautiful colors coming together to bid the sun goodbye.

Suddenly the weight of another had caused you to shift your balance. You were so distracted by the sunset you hadn't realized that Reiner had come over to sit next to you. He rested his head on your shoulders and closed his eyes, relaxing his body at the presence of yours.

"You aren't going home to see your family?" You broke the silence with a question.

"Not yet," Reiner responded, exhaustion coating his voice. "I want to stay here a little longer with you." He couldn't afford losing you too. Even though he couldn't tell you yet, he still loved you just as much as he did before.

You slowly edged your hand towards his, letting your fingers slip in between his. In an instant he closed his hand around yours. A small blush crept onto your face.

Before you knew it, the light had completely escaped. Stars scattered across the ethereal night sky, the moon rose high in the sky reflecting itself upon the water. Quietly, Reiner watched the waves continuously grow in size.

All that selfishness still resided deep within him. That selfish urge he had to take you away from Paradis. Just because he loved you. He hated himself for that but at the same time he couldn't fool himself, a part of him was glad he did.

Reiner stood up and offered his hand out to you. Another tired smile. "Y/N it's getting late. With the way you're swaying back and forth, I wouldn't be surprised if you fell into the water."

You grabbed his hand and gently squeezed it. "Thank you for staying with me Reiner." You hoisted yourself up, nearly stumbling back.

He nodded, and managed a small grin. "You're welcome."

Reiner was quick to offer to walk you home tonight and at first you opposed to it but he insisted, so in the end he took you back home.

"Reiner," You breathed out and looked up at him "did you know my parents?" The sight of children running into the arms of their parents suddenly came back to you.

He stopped walking, his shoulders tensed up. Then he relaxed. "You parents? I never had the chance to. They weren't alive when I met you."

"Oh." Your expression fell. "I hope all those memories come back one day. If they died the least I want to do is remember them."

Reiner buried his hands deep in his pockets, the feeling of guilt returning once again. "Hopefully."

You wiped all those feelings away and forced yourself to smile. If it's been that long since they've been gone you had no reason to feel sad. Before the accident you assumed that you had already moved on.

"What was I like? Were we really close?" The questions came flooding in.

"Sweet, selfless. Also really tough. You were also very reckless." He released a breathy laugh. "We were really close friends, more than that actually.." Reiner muttered the last part under his breath.

You rubbed the back of your head. "Reckless huh? That made me laugh."

"It's true though. We used to fight along side each other."

The smile quickly faltered from your face. A soldier? A warrior? Was that what you were? Your mouth shaped itself into a 'O' in astonishment. "I used to.. fight?"

"Yeah." He replied "Our friends used to watch–" Reiner's voice trailed off mid sentence.

"Pieck and Porco? Them?"

"No." He shook his head "Just different friends who are somewhere else now."

You widened your eyes and hunched over, burying your face in the palms of your hands. Your vision faded in and out as a sharp pain struck your head. Flashes of dark silhouettes appeared in your mind, standing over them seemed to be a monster. A large monster that looked almost human, but it was completely naked and looked horrifying.

Reiner kneeled in front of you, placing his hands on your shoulders. "What's wrong Y/N? Are you alright?"

Memories? Were these memories? Your stomach churned in disgust, you wanted to vomit so bad. There was no way those were real. You could feel the bile surging up your throat.

"Hey." Reiner quietly called out to you and lifted your face to look at him. "I'm right here okay?"

Your body trembled uncontrollably. Your eyes were brimming with tears, you heart was beating at a significant pace. Seeing his face helped bring you back to reality. You desperately clung onto the collar of his coat.

"My head hurts," You whimpered, begging to make it stop. "What the hell did I see?"

Reiner wrapped his arms around you, pulling you to a tight embrace. He held the back of your head. "I don't know what you're going through but I promise I won't let you go through it alone."

In moments you passed out in his arms. The warmth of his embrace brought reassurance and comfort to your mind, those horrific images faded away.

–

authors note; im so unsatisfied with this chapter,
i might go back to revise it in the future but for now
i'll give you guys this. i'm sorry this update took so long, still recovering from s4ep8. i actually
wrote so many drafts of this chapter and deleted all of them.. is this writers block?

oh well, please bare with me. i promise to
try and make it more interesting for you all. :')

imy sasha bb <3

signed off, kyr0mii